Gabby and Ken
by JoeLaTurkey
Summary: Will the Normandy's favourite double-act ever realise their potential as a couple? Let's find out. Kenneth/Gabriella
1. Procrastination

**Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing of the Mass Effect Universe.**

**Gabby and Ken of the Normandy SR-2 made all of us smile. For some reason I haven't found much of a following for them in the fanfiction world so I decided to write my own.**

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Kenneth Donnelly was a brilliant engineer with an almost-spotless service record, serving on the finest ship in the galaxy. Kenneth was quite sure he was supposed to be living up to all this grandeur in some profound way. He was certainly _not _supposed to be leaning on a quickly-numbing hand, sighing like a surly teenager. Grateful as he was for Shepard's contribution of the FBA couplings, finding ways to fill all this vacant time was fast becoming a headache. Craning his neck to get a good long look at Jack only allowed so much procrastination (as it yielded limited results and was often deadly) and staring into the Drive Core, hoping to see something unique had become boring by day three. He couldn't fake another piss break either. He turned to Gabby. She'd been deadpanning at that bloody screen for way too long without idle chatter. Or calling him a dick…well, no real difference there.

So it was time to do what he did best when boredom reached such a critical level.

He let his fingers fly on the keyboard.

**- Sooooooo… - **

Gabby let out an irritated hiss as the message popped up on her screen, disrupting what had been twenty minutes of progress on a system-wide scan. 2185 and the galaxy had yet to be rid of both slow elevators _and _loading screens.

"Kenneth!" Gabby exclaimed, turning to face the culprit. He had that stupid grin on his face again. "Thanks a lot, now I've got to start over!" She closed the message and tried to restart the scan. Another message; god she was going to kill him one of these days.

**- The scan can wait Gabs, I know you're as bored as I am right now. -**

"Ken I'm standing right next to you!" she protested. Despite the fact that she was yelling in his ear he was still fixated on his screen, grin exposing his feigned concentration. "Why do you insist on clogging my inbox when we spend all day standing six feet apart?"

She started a third scanning attempt, before adding in an undertone: "could do with a couple more between us. I can smell the haggis and scotch whisky on your breath."

**- Hey! I resent that! - **

A small smile tugged at her lips. Sending him just one message couldn't hurt, could it?

**- Weren't you bitching about Gardener being unable to cook up some of that 'mighty fine arse' just a fortnight ago? - **

Thank goodness. Her message had wiped the damn grin off his face. The glib Scotsman was now frowning, though he looked mildly impressed.

**- I can survive on other foods, Gab! - **

**- Really? Wow. The message says no but your pale complexion and flaming hair scream yes. - **

Kenneth sniggered, and then applied a look of over-exaggerated shock and distaste.

**- More stereotypes? Don't make me toss a caber at you woman!** -

Gabby giggled. He could be a real boil on the ass of life sometimes. But a boil that never failed to make her laugh. She let her hands back on the keyboard with the confidence that the momentum had shifted in her favour.

- **I'll cut the stereotypes as soon as you give me a good reason over why you feel the need to message me like your life depends on it. - **

Gabby swore she could hear him tut at this.

**- I don't cut deals with prejudiced people…you American pig. -**

They snorted in unison. Resurrecting old Academy nicknames was always good for a cheap laugh. Cerberus may have been more informal but the family atmosphere was just lacking.

**- Careful what you type there Ken, some people might take it the wrong way. - **

**- Seriously Gab, why are you so hung up over email recently? -**

**- I just think you should be more careful with what goes into the database under your name, Ken. Are we gonna have another incident like the one where Joker tried to download 'Backdoor Azure III?' - **

Ken snorted harder than before at this and a look of fond reminiscence glazed over his brown eyes.

- **Tell me Gabby, what's the REAL reason you're protecting your inbox like a newborn child? Worried any love notes from that big, blue-armored turian upstairs will get lost in the shuffle? - **

Gabby could feel his eyes on her as the blush crept up her cheeks. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of losing it.

**- I'm not even dignifying that with an answer - **

**- AHA, the rumours ARE true! - **

- **Watch it young man! - **

**- Sorry mum. - **

There he was again with that "mum" business. She didn't appreciate it at the best of times and she really wasn't happy he'd done it in front of Shepard. _Men, _she thought.

- **You NEED to be more conservative with email, Ken. You know that Shepard can read these whenever he wants. Plus…we're an illegal organization, there are others that can access the files. Unfriendly types. -**

**- Yeah right, like the Shadow Broker's got nothing better to do than go through our email. That's about as likely as him having an hour-long vid of Jacob doing crunches with his shirt off. And don't worry about the Commander. He's too busy balling Chambers to care what we get up to ;-) - **

**- KENNETH! - **

His face lit up with glee at her outrage.

**- Oh yeah, like you don't know! Redheads Gabby, redheads. We've got that appeal. - **

**- I agree…I'm standing next to the exception that proves the rule! - **

**- Don't make me grab my trusty Claymore! - **

- **Loving the Scottish temper there, hon -**

**- It's my favourite way of annoying you …or would it not be easier to simply poke you with a stick? - **

She grimaced and banged her head against the rail in front of them while he punched the air triumphantly and made the kind of indecipherable noise you associated with an elated football fan.

**- Ken for the love of Jesus, we are NOT wasting another day swapping Autoware quotes. - **

**- Why not? We used to do it all the time. -**

**- We used to serve in the Alliance. Things change, Kenny. -**

He grunted stubbornly as he typed the reply.

- **You're just bitter cause I beat you to that Achievement Award! - **

Gabby gasped, scandalised. This again?

**- We both know you cheated! -**

**- Did not - **

**- Did too -**

**- Did NOT - **

**- Did TOO - **

Ken hesitated. Drake Era: Genesis had been their favourite addictive pastime back in their old Alliance days; plus it was the perfect way to satisfy highly competitive natures without resorting to engineering one-upmanship that pissed off their COs. He wasn't going to tarnish that memory. This dispute was a road well-travelled. Plus no man wanted to face another day trying to kill time while stood next to an angry woman. Even though she _was_ cute when she got like this.

_Time to change the subject to something more current, Kennyboy. _

Gabriella quelled her annoyance and mounted another gargantuan effort to shift focus back to anything besides Kenneth's mind games. She opened a folder and lazily eyed the FBA schematics for the billionth time. No need to bother with another system scanning attempt, he'd start another inane email exchange just to thwart it. But then a sideways glance to Kenneth revealed a rather sheepish and apologetic-looking man, who met her eyes for the first time since the shift started. Did he really care about hurting her? Maybe it was okay to resume work now.

**Initializing System Scan…1%**

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**Initialization halted…**

Then again maybe not. She opened it.

**- So, you and Garrus -**

"Kenneth!" The red was rising in her cheeks again and all sheepishness was gone from her insufferable colleague. A second triumphant noise filled the engine room, every bit as indecipherable as the last. _Honestly. _Was it physically possible for a man look any smugger? "What are you implyi-"

He interrupted her with a warning wag of his finger and motioned to the orange glowing terminals. She reluctantly turned back to the screen.

- **C'mon Gabby, tell me what's new with you and the big blue member of the crew. Wow, a poet and I don't know it…or maybe I know it but I never show it. - **

She buried her face in her hands. This felt more endless than hours of staring at the scan's progress. At least the scan didn't try to rap in text form.

**- Poetry huh? Don't quit your day job, Kenneth. Whatever that is. – **

**- I'm also a musician. Been working on a piece for you to sing to Garrus… - **

**- This I have to see. Or hear. Or not. – **

**- Aaaaaarchangel, Archangel, will you be miiiiiiiine? My darling dear, love you all the tiiiiime, I'm just a fool, a fool in love with youuuuu - **

They'd have to watch that old vid again soon. Crazy how the story behind the term 'flux capacitor' could get just about everything else about physics wrong.

**- Willing to go back two hundred years for the right pop culture reference eh? Impressive. But give it up Ken the rumour isn't true. There's nothing to tell.- **

**- Oh really? Maybe you're just being more secretive than usual. I bet he's your desktop background! All scarred and sexy in a rough-edged, jagged, alieny kinda way. - **

He mockingly leaned over her shoulder and took his first full view of her screen.

"HEY!"

Gabby leapt a foot in the air. This word had actually come from Kenneth's mouth.

"Why am I listed as **HairyLoudScottishGuyModel101 **in your contacts list?"

She grinned ear-to-ear as she typed her response.

- **Well…you said you wanted me to be more 'open and honest' when we emailed -**

He huffed, red in the face, furious at how far the tables had turned. Any vocal or textual response was interrupted by Shepard on the intercom.

"Guys, could you come up here? Garrus wants to go over some schematics for upgrading the gun." The intercom's buzz died down again.

"Okay woman!" Kenneth hissed menacingly, eyes narrow. "You win _this _round." They turned and headed for the elevator.

* * *

Five minutes later, Gabby came rushing back in. Her lie over leaving an omni-tool down here may have worked just fine on Shepard, but Kenneth had eyed her with suspicion. She crept to his terminal and logged in.

'_Daddybags' real original password, Ken. _

Her name in the contacts was easy enough to spot: **CommonGreaseMonkey. **

_Hmm...could be much worse I guess. _

From her room down below the deck, Jack stared at the young woman and groaned.

"When will those two just fuck each other and get it over with?"

* * *

**Author's Note: Well, there's the first chapter. Please leave a review and let me know what you think; I can't do this without your feedback**


	2. Showdown

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Main Battery Room**

"Wow,_ this _is why I love starships!"

Gabby didn't even try to contain her excitement as Garrus uploaded the disc and the small red room was filled with the white light of its hologram. It showed the underside of the SR-2, only now equipped with an enormous dual-barrelled gun. Garrus took note of the young woman's tone, saw her open mouth and shot her a sideways smile.

"The Thanix Magnetic-Hydrodynamic Weapon," he proudly announced with a dramatic sweep of his hand. "Better known as the Thanix Cannon."

"Awesome!" Gabby gasped, almost inaudible. She took to his side, in order to study the rotating hologram in more detail. "Just…_wow." _She fired up her omni-tool and started recording every last detail.

"Now remember Engineer Daniels, this tech will almost double the Normandy's standard power draw, so the…"

Kenneth frowned and folded his arms, leaning against a bulkhead behind them. The turian was now throwing out tech jargon (he didn't register what, he wasn't exactly listening intently) just for the sake of showing off and she was eating it up. She'd see right through the act if he was the one showboating. What did Garrus know that he didn't?

"…capacitors…"

_Bugger, _she was staring at the scars again.

_Just marry him already!_

"…Drive Core. Wouldn't you agree, Engineer Donnelly?"

"Huh?"

Garrus was eyeing him with that trademark intense stare, evidently waiting for Kenneth's opinion on something.

"Oh, I err…" Kenneth flushed, unaware of what he had just been asked about and let his eyes dart around the room for inspiration behind what it may have been. Gabby shook her head in a way that made him feel two inches tall.

"Never mind," said the turian, turning back to Gabby.

The big, blue-armoured bastard then muttered something to her which elicited a small giggle. The kind of giggle that only he, Kenneth, was supposed to elicit. The feeling of humiliation intensified.

"Massive improvement over the current Javelin disruptor system," continued the turian as he collected the holodisc and pocketed it. "This thing replaces a dark energy-emitting warhead with a stream of superheated molten metal, believe it or not."

Gabby scrolled through her omni-tool's newly-acquired files.

"Let's see…dual-barrelled armament…platinum inner and outer shell…it's definitely a turian design."

"Very good," said Garrus. "Though I have to tell you, this technology wasn't obtained in the most honest way."

"What do you mean?" Kenneth snapped without warning.

To Gabby and Ken's inexperienced eyes, Garrus had either failed to notice the hostility of this rather insolent question or was too well-mannered to acknowledge it. They couldn't tell. Kenneth didn't care.

"Well, you could say that this particular gun is basically a miniaturised version of what we saw Sovereign decimate the Citadel Fleet with two years ago."

Gabby made another awed noise and resumed her file-checking while Garrus continued to explain.

"After the Battle of the Citadel there was a three month salvage operation conducted by human and turian volunteers to rid the station's orbit of all the debris. Turns out the turian teams were actually weapon specialists collecting samples of Sovereign's main weapon and eezo core for the purpose of recreating both. Eleven months later," he tapped his pocket containing the disc, "the Thanix Cannon schematics were finished. Just don't ask me how I got this copy."

"How exactly does it work?" said Gabby.

"Well, the standard Javelin Torpedoes a-"

"Are fired on converging trajectories, utilising a precisely-timed detonation sequence to resonate their dark energy fields, thus maximising their time-warp and devastating the target," drawled Kenneth, his monologue sped up with every word. "We've all read the Alliance Codex; tell us something we don't know."

Gabby and Garrus stared. Kenneth looked at the floor, he hadn't meant to sound so icy and dismissive. Well…truth be told he _had; _it had just turned out to be a much better idea in his head than in practice.

Garrus was the first to recover his voice. "Uh yeah…so…anyway, it's important to note that Sovereign's cannon wasn't a direct energy weapon, but actually fired a stream of liquid-iron-uranium tungsten alloy that had to be suspended-"

"By an electromagnetic field from an unusually large eezo core which could accurately shape it into an armour piercing projectile," Kenneth interrupted again, his anger prompting his mind to recall the trickiest things they had taught at the Academy. "Which is why only the SR2's Tantalus is currently capable of duplicating it."

Kenneth then realised he was clenching his fists and trying to match the turian's stare. What had come over him?

Garrus was completely bewildered by this point. He responded with a rather unsure nod. Engineer Donnelly seemed to have been offended by something he'd said or done. Perhaps he needed to do more reading on human social conventions. He cleared his throat again and resumed rather tentatively.

"Yes...that is how it works. Very impressive Engineer Donnelly."

Garrus turned to Engineer Daniels, who looked every bit as embarrassed as he felt. "The Javelins are excellent but it would still take several volleys to damage a Collector vessel. I think our only real chance of taking it out quickly is upgrading to the Thanix."

"What makes you so sure?" she asked.

"The SR2 inherited quite a bit of the old Normandy's database, even in its final moments." Garrus fired up his terminal. "And in those final moments the SSV Normandy managed to take a rough scan of the Collector vessel. But we'll still probably need to upgrade the ship's armour and kinetic barriers to maximise our chances. Going through the Omega 4 Relay would likely p-"

"Put us into 'knife fight' proximity with the Collector vessel meaning short-range use would increase the risk of-"

"Kenneth, for God's sake will you let him finish?" cried Gabby, angrily rounding on him.

Kenneth wasn't really one for reading turian facial expressions but Garrus seemed to be doing his species' equivalent of eyebrow raising.

Gabby looked from Garrus, who was still politely bewildered, to Kenneth, who looked ready to break something.

_What the hell is he doing?_

Surely this didn't have anything to do with her supposed crush; they very thing they'd been joking about just ten minutes ago. Was this a jealous outburst? Was he acting the overprotective brother again? Or was he just trying too hard to make up for being caught daydreaming?

"Just trying to make myself useful for once Gabby," he retorted, still not tearing his eyes away from Garrus.

"Does that mean you have to interrupt all the time?"

"Not _all the time, _just when I n-"

"Because it is so rude!"

"You're one to talk! What about that time when-"

"Are we going to have a problem here?"

Shepard's smooth, yet always imposing tone came from the doorway. He entered the room and took a seat beside Kenneth. For some reason the Spectre looked more amused than angry and the room's other occupants wondered how much of their conversation he had listened to.

"No sir," said Gabby, her tone quiet but dangerous and icy. "I was just on my way back to Engineering." She stormed out, taking extra special care to bump into Kenneth's shoulder as she passed him.

The most uncomfortable silence of Kenneth's life followed, made worse by Shepard's knowing smile.

"Aren't you gonna go after her?" the Commander jibed with the air of a man enjoying himself way too much. Blushing furiously, Kenneth nodded and hurried out of sight.

* * *

He caught her just as she was about to enter the vacant elevator.

"Kenneth, you are such a dick sometimes it is just unbelievable!" she snapped, staring daggers at him.

"I'm sorry, I was just-"

She raised her eyebrows expecting a witty and well-worded lie, but he had no explanation this time.

"Did you really need to be so petty? He was just doing his job!"

"Oh come on! Who says we even need the damned upgrade?"

"You tell me, Mr. Alliance-Certified Power Engineer, First Class!"

It was a really stupid question. He knew it was a stupid question before it was even fully out of his mouth, but argument for the sake of argument really felt like a good idea right now for some reason.

"Look, I know I overreacted in there Gab, I just wanted to-"

"One-up him?" Her eyes flashed with fury. "I know you're competitive; hell, I know that better than anyone but why would you want to do that to Garrus when all he's ever done is be polite to you?"

"I…no reason," he lied, blinking several times. "Just think you could do better," he added under his breath.

Gabby's eyes widened with disbelief and the lunch table round the corner seating crewmembers Goldstein, Hadley, Hawthorne and Matthews erupted with sniggers.

"_That's _what this is about? A stupid rumour?" she yelled, now red in the face. "I keep telling you it's not like that and even if it was, what the hell do you care? Why does it even matter so much to you?"

Kenneth tripped over his words as the crewmen's noises became louder and more gleeful. Even Patel was in the middle of a silent fit of girlish giggles as she left the crew quarters.

"A guy gets torn up by a gunship at point-blank range and somehow _I'm _the one in the wrong for expressing a great deal of concern! Must've taken a real genius to arrive at that logic, huh Ken?"

Kenneth took a step backwards, she looked demented.

"The same amount of concern I would lend towards anybody with that level of injury!" Her voice was still somehow getting louder and she locked eyes with him. "Well, _almost _anybody!" she added.

A chorus of 'ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhs' came from the table.

"YOU DON'T MEAN THAT!" shouted Kenneth, this time taking two steps towards her.

Tired of this exchange and wary of their captivated audience, Gabby hit the switch and stepped inside.

"Wait, go back to the Main Battery Room for a minute," she said as he entered beside her.

"Why?" he asked, stepping out again.

"Because I don't want to share this ride with you." The doors closed and she was gone.

The crew followed up this ruthless move with an even louder jeer.

"You go girlfriend!" screeched Matthews. Caught in the hilarity of the moment, Goldstein and Hawthorne then stood up and began a conga line that was soon joined by Gardener, Patel, an un-cloaking Kasumi and the security guard Bert.

"Go Gabby! Go Gabby! Go Gabby!" they chanted.

"What's the matter Ken? Garrus acting like a dog with a cuttlebone around your girl?" called Hadley.

Kenneth marched swiftly around the elevator, gave the crewmen a brief, one-fingered wave then returned. He hit the button marked 'Engineering Deck' as she had done and as the doors closed, picked up a few badly-sung seconds of the crew's rendition of:

"THE LOOOOOOOVE BOOOOOOOOOAAAAAT!"

"Bastards!" he growled.

* * *

The solitary ride seemed to take forever. He fought very hard against the temptation to bang his head against the wall until it split open and his tiny pea of a brain fell out. He had made complete fools of both of them with his own, stupid insecurities.

'_Why does it even matter so much to you?' _

"Gabby," he whispered with a shake of his head. "Do you not know?"

The doors slid open to reveal her. She was crouched on the floor running her fingers over its metal panels in an impatient and irritable manner.

"Dropped the spare chip for my omni-tool," she muttered as neutrally as she could.

Kenneth looked closer. Her eyes looked swollen and bloodshot, had she been crying over this? As if sensing what he was doing, she turned away.

"D'you want me to help you look?" he asked.

"No. Go away Ken." She sounded angry but shaky, as if on the edge of tears.

"Hey, I'm only trying to help!"

"Yeah and look how that turned out last time!"

He recoiled again. How did she manage to make him do that every time?

"Fine!" he barked. "At least let me apo-"

"I'm not the one you should be apologising to Ken and you know it." She picked up the tiny chip and headed to the Engine Room in a manner that told him she didn't want to be followed.

Kenneth grunted and headed back to the elevator. Better apologise to the Gunnery Officer and Commander as soon as possible. Even if it meant enduring more suggestive nineteen seventies TV theme tunes.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Zaeed's Room**

Zaeed looked up from his game of Skyllian Five with Grunt, listening. Age and frequent explosions hadn't dulled his hearing too badly. And experience had taught him to trust his hunches. Those two in Engineering were an unplanned pregnancy or knife fight waiting to happen. He still wasn't sure which.

_Bloody kids, _he thought. He'd met krogan Battlemasters that couldn't cut through that amount of sexual tension.

_She's too uptight to notice it and he's too goddamn chicken to act on it._


	3. Wager

**I must thank the talented Lockdown for the fanfiction Magnum Opus - "The Garrus Vakarian List" which influenced this chapter. If you haven't seen it, check it out. **

**Warning: The views expressed by Zaeed Massani in this chapter concerning Garrus Vakarian jokes do not reflect those of the author. **

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Kasumi's room**

Kelly settled on the black leather sofa and cosily drew her knees to her chest, mirroring the pose of the Japanese woman opposite. She enjoyed these sessions they had together. Kasumi was not only a pleasant person but a worthy challenge for the best of her psychoanalytical abilities. She had this inimitable method of coming across in a glib and friendly manner without ever giving too much of herself or her thoughts away. For all the talent and training she had in dealing with people, Kelly still found the thief something of an enigma: approachable and outgoing yet unreadable. The two women had hit it off well and found they were always able to discuss matters, serious and mission-related or just idle gossip. Today the latter was on everyone's mind.

"So I take it you won't be joining more conga lines with the crew any time soon?" Kelly asked.

Kasumi shuddered. "Are you kidding me? It was bad enough having Bert's _eyes _on my ass. I didn't think I was going to get away without hurting him."

The yeoman giggled, albeit sympathetically. Bert had been like an octopus.

"I think you may have to start cloaking through the whole ship now," Kelly said. "All it takes is to give them a little sample."

"You should know," Kasumi retorted with a smile. "You gave a sample and then some."

Kelly blushed at the thief's comeback, but she hadn't denied to anyone what was between her and the Commander or how shameless and forward she'd been from day one. If anything Kelly was rather pleased with herself. Either way, Kasumi was glad that she didn't frighten as easily as Gabby or Ken, who both seemed to have the emotional levels of twelve year-olds right now.

"Speaking of scandalous ship romance," Kasumi continued, unable to resist. "What are we to do about everyone's favourite engineering duo?"

Kelly cocked an eyebrow. "You're that interested?"

"Oh come now Kelly, we all know _you're _the ship's hopeless romantic. They'd make a great couple, I just don't think they'll ever realise it…without some help."

"Wouldn't you rather let nature run its course?"

"No," said Kasumi flatly. "Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying they aren't made for each other and all, I just think destiny could do with a little speeding up due to the whole 'going into the eye of the storm and not sure if we're coming back' thing hanging over all our heads." She rubbed her gloved hands together in a manner worthy of any fictional supervillian. "I think I'd rather enjoy playing matchmaker."

"Oh? Thinking of taking some time off from chasing Jacob?" said Kelly, both eyebrows cocked this time.

Kasumi laughed in disbelief; nothing was going to run her off _that _particular course.

"Of course not. Just thinking of adding another project to my spare time." She motioned to the collection of priceless trophies around the room. "I'm a galactically-renowned thief Kelly, I always get what I want eventually and Jacob isn't such a hard nut to crack. Getting _those_ two together on the other hand would be a huge achievement." The bright eyes beneath her hood's shadow flickered, brightening with mischief. "For one of us at least," she added with a wink.

Kelly closed her eyes and shook her head. Was Kasumi honestly encumbered with enough free time to instigate a challenge ripped straight from every clichéd high school soap opera?

"I was going to say we could work together," she sighed, "but why do I suddenly have the horrible feeling you're about to suggest a wager?"

Kasumi grinned; Kelly had guessed the truth. "Because I've not really been sure about what to do with myself lately. Not much call for thievery aboard a ship." She frowned and leaned towards to Kelly. "And you're the Normandy's shrink, isn't it your job to be nosy and intrusive in personal matters?"

Kelly nodded, unabashed though wondering if Kasumi took anything seriously.

"Of course it is. I just don't bring gambling into it."

"Then we'll put nothing on the line but bragging rights," Kasumi said, before leaning further forward and lowering her voice to a menacing whisper. "Which can always change, Chambers."

Kelly stood and drew herself up to her full height. Her expression of mock anger looked almost convincing.

"You're on."

Kasumi rose also and moved towards Kelly with a silent, fluid elegance the yeoman could never hope to match. The two women then shook hands with some caution. Kelly retracted hers first and started towards the door with surprising quickness.

"What's the hurry? Off to arrange the next booty call with Shepard?"

"Of course," said the young redhead curtly, now feeling _very _pleased with herself. "Bye."

She left Kasumi alone in the dim room.

_Oh poor Kelly, that was too easy, _thought the thief._ I wonder how long it will take you to find the tracking device I just put on your shirt._

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Mess Hall**

Kenneth strolled out of the Main Battery Room, a place he never wanted to see again. It was good to have at least one burden off his mind. Garrus and Shepard had readily accepted his apology and for that he was grateful. All that remained now was the small task of finding a way to adequately make up for hurting and humiliating the one person he cared about more than anyone else in the galaxy.

Upon returning to the Normandy's third deck to issue the apology, Kenneth was pleased to find out that Shepard (or more likely Miranda, given her temperament and the close proximity of her office) had dismissed the small crowd of witnesses to the argument and the Normandy SR-2 was returning to its regular routine: dramatic suicide mission talk interrupted by the occasional nervous joke and several shitloads of self-reflection.

_Well, you've apologised to the boss and his sidekick Ken, she's got no excuse to ignore you now...but then again, women tend to throw all the conventional rules out the window when they get angry._

He started for the elevator yet again, hoping it would be his last ride of the day.

"Hi Kenneth!" Kelly chirped as she appeared from out of nowhere at his side. She looked strangely excited about something. Maybe it was time to arrange another booty call with Shepard. He braced himself for the inevitable, thinly-veiled attempt at casual therapy she had been trying with everybody from day one.

"Oh...hey Kelly," he grumbled a little too late.

"I'd give it a bit more time before returning to the Engine Room if I were you," she blurted as he reached out to the control panel.

Kenneth blinked in surprise. "What? Why?"

She continued to beam at him in that bizarre way. What had come over her?

"You know...let her cool down a bit."

He nodded and backed out, not knowing if he should be thankful for the advice or angry that everyone still thought that what had happened was their business.

"I'm going back to the CIC now, seeya later!" Her tone was still bright and infuriating. They may as well have been talking about pedicures.

Kelly positioned herself in front of the control panel so he couldn't see her hit 'Engineering Deck.'

It would be really pathetic to fake another twenty minute piss break now. He turned his attention to Kasumi's room.

_I need a drink._

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Kasumi's Room**

Just as she had expected, Kasumi saw the small red dot labelled 'KellyC' heading towards the Engineering Deck on her omni-tool's miniature map. The bubbly yeoman had made the first move, good for her. What she didn't expect was the loud knock on the door.

"Hey Kasumi, bar still open?"

Kenneth's heavily-accented voice came through the steel panels. She opened the door and crossed her arms.

"Having a loud fight with your woman and now drowning yourself in alcohol," she snapped. "You're doing nothing to help stereotypes Ken."

He was angered by this observation but far too tired to instigate another full-blown argument.

"Don't you have a painted face and ninja skills?" he groaned.

Kasumi cut off her response to consider this for a moment. He had a point.

"Touché, Donnelly. Go on in."

Kasumi slithered past Kenneth as he entered. She wasn't going to stoop to Kelly's level by talking to him about Gabby directly: a lifetime of thievery had given her a tendency to do everything with both subtlety and unnecessary intricacy. He would be left there alone while she formulated a more sophisticated plot and not another word about his hilarious, tragic and always dysfunctional love life would need to pass between them.

With a stab of dread, she then remembered Shepard's last solitary drinking session in her room. She may not have needed to discuss Gabby with him, but alcohol and bathroom etiquette was ground that had to be covered. When she turned her head back to Kenneth he was already seated and mixing something.

"Just remember, if you feel the need to stumble around until you break into a toilet cubicle and collapse in a vomit-covered heap, the men's bathroom is on the _Port_ Side of the ship!" she warned. "I never want to hear Miranda scream that loud again."

She activated her tactical cloak and vanished from sight.

Kenneth grunted in affirmation and slurped down a few gulps of the nearest cocktail. It was flat and flavourless, and brought him no closer to that familiar, pleasant numbness. What was he even doing here? His desire to drink himself stupid had disappeared as quickly as it had come. It wasn't going to solve anything. He hated what he'd done to Gabby, but just hadn't been able to contain his distaste over the thought of her and Garrus.

_Distaste? Call it what it is Kenneth: 'jealousy.' You were jealous._

Indeed he was. The idea of them being more than friends had never been explicitly considered, but the alternative; the thought of someone else in either of their lives was even stranger. She was so important to him, and Kenneth knew beyond all doubt that he mattered a great deal to her. They'd been through thick and thin and she'd never left his side. Gabby had outright hated the idea of him taking the risk of entering a group like Cerberus without her guidance.

_"If they decide to slit your throat in your sleep, it'll have to be mine first."_

A fond smile came to his lips as he remembered not only those words but the concern in her eyes, the defiant courage. Gabby meant everything to him. She had for a long time. But then the same thing happened that had happened for the last two years whenever he had considered his feelings for Gabby: he remembered the awful truth.

_Who am I kidding? _he thought hopelessly, emptying the glass and getting to his feet. _The Perugia was the right time._

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Gabby slumped against the rail, still fighting back tears. The soft swirl of the Drive Core's beautiful colours were doing nothing to calm her this time. When did this happen? It was so unlike her. She was a grown woman, a former first-class engineer in the galaxy's greatest navy and now serving on the finest ship ever built. The days of running off alone to cry about boys should have been over.

_Rationalise it, girl. It's what you do best. _

This was probably just a rare case of their verbal jousting going too far. Teasing had been overdone before. Halfway through Tech Academy they'd made a truce. She'd stopped likening him to Scotty and in return he had stopped mocking the way she pronounced "propulsion," but this most recent incident felt different. Kenneth was behaving like he'd been presented with a real threat in Garrus and Gabby hadn't anticipated how volatile he would be. There were no prior experiences like this to weigh against.

Neither had been in a relationship with anyone since before the Academy days, as duty in the Alliance and beyond had consumed so much time, almost all of that time spent together. Keeping engineering duos with each other posting-to-posting was a common Alliance initiative. Commanding Officers understood the importance of their engineers and the power of trust and familiarity in the ranks, seeing as how all aboard the ship entrusted their lives to this particular wing of the service and a single mistake could spell their end. Kenneth and her had been inseparable even before they were officially contracted to each other by the Navy, and now that they were part of Cerberus and their families thought they had just transferred to work in an independent ship-developing corporation the duo would need to look out for one another even more. All things considered it was only natural for some territorial feelings to develop. She nodded at this thought. It was both reasonable and comforting.

_Older brother protectiveness brought about by years of close proximity, that's all it is. It can't be anything else._

She heard the door open and tentative footsteps behind her.

_Great, here he comes. _She still didn't feel ready to talk.

"What do you want, copper-crotch?" Gabby asked wearily, not sure if this challenging insult was a joke or not. No response. She turned to face him and to her horror didn't see Kenneth standing there, but a startled Kelly Chambers.

"Oh shit! Sorry Kelly, I thought you were Kenneth!" she wailed, holding her hands out defensively as Jack began to roar with laughter beneath them.

"It's alright," Kelly breathed, mustering her best look of understanding and care though still feeling rather taken aback. "I'd be mad at him too." She moved to Gabby's side and joined her unfocused Drive Core staring. "How are you holding up?"

"I hate him." Gabby hissed, closing tear-filled eyes and dropping her head towards the floor. Another uncharacteristic and childish outburst, what was wrong with her? "I just _hate _him!"

Kelly paused, choosing her next word with care. Jack's continual howling below wasn't helping either of them.

"I don't think you're like this because you hate him."

Gabby heard nothing but gentle wisdom in Kelly's words. She was right.

"And Ken's not behaving like a dick because he hates you either," Kelly followed up. She looked straight at Gabby. "In fact it seems to be quite the opposite."

Gabby would have liked to believe this. Kenneth was her best friend, the only person who she felt understood her completely. The only person who could make her this angry and earn her forgiveness so damn quickly. She allowed herself one more time to entertain the idea that something more could work between them, that he saw her as more than his bossy little sister.

But who was she kidding? The Perugia had been the right place and time.

Kelly tapped her shoulder. Kasumi was right; destiny needed some serious speeding up.

"I'll come back later, take care of yourself Gab."

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Zaeed's room**

"Show me what you've got, lizard boy!"

Zaeed Massani cackled as he threw his cards down onto the makeshift table and brought an unusually lopsided game of Skyllian Five to a close. Grunt was terrible. Okeer's memory imprints may have included impeccable tips on human anatomical and military weaknesses but unfortunately nothing on card games. The defeated krogan tossed aside his own cards with a frustrated roar.

"Bah! These human games are boring and soft!"

"SOFT!" Zaeed yelled, dismayed. "This skill may save your life one day son. When I was en route to killing this hotshot batarian bitch Kallathin Dryarr-"

"Yeah Yeah! You already told this story. You got captured, played cards to gamble your freedom and killed Dryarr with a Polish Bike Ride."

"Exactly!" the mercenary boomed, smile creasing his scarred face as the all-too vivid flashback cropped up. "Silly bastards gave me a choice between Skyllian Five and Russian Roulette. I probably had more skill in the latter game but still," he tapped the card pack as though it were a young relative. "You don't always have to take the biggest risk, just the one that gets you to your target quickest."

Grunt sniggered. "You turned down a chance to use guns for a card game? I take it that's what all humans do when they get old?"

"Hey!" Zaeed leaned forward and jabbed a gnarled finger into Grunt's shining chest plate. "I don't have to take that kind of talk from a bloody _virgin!"_

Before the argument could escalate to the level of bulkhead destruction, an extranet terminal Zaeed had perched on top of the nearest ammo crate gave a series of loud, harsh beeps. Zaeed pulled himself off the floor and shuffled towards it, trying to walk off the pins and needles. He examined the screen and saw two new messages stored under his name.

_**Garrus Vakarian broke the #1 rule on Omega…and Aria LOVED it.**_

_**The 'Big Bang?' that was just Garrus Vakarian learning to masturbate.**_

"Oh goddamn it!" growled the veteran as he slammed a fist down on the highlighted 'delete' option. "When will those things stop circulating?"

"What things?" said Grunt.

Zaeed waved his tattooed right arm dismissively.

"I dunno, some extranet chain letter bollocks." The sound of Donnelly coughing outside then turned his head to the door.

_Finally, time to talk to Mr. Chickenshit. _

"Beat it!" he snarled at the seated krogan. "I'll teach you Monopoly tomorrow."

Grunt was furious at this news, but refrained from fulfilling his momentary desire to crush the nearest souvenir. He sort of respected Massani: humans were squishy but the old man had shown unusual durability on more than one occasion. He left without another word.

"Hey you! Connelly!" Zaeed yelled from the doorway. "Get in here! You and me are gonna have a talk."

"It's _Donnelly_!" replied the very nervous Scotsman. Zaeed wasn't sure what was scaring him more: the moody krogan, the prospect of returning to that poor girl, or having a heart-to-heart with a man like himself. He wasn't patient enough to figure it out though.

"It'll be 'recently deceased' if you don't get in here!"

Kenneth dragged himself towards the bounty hunter's quarters, wondering if he'd ever return. But just before he reached the room, he spotted Kelly sneaking out of Engineering.

"I thought you were going back to the CIC!" he said. At the rate the elevator moved there was no way she could've gone to the CIC and then come back down. He didn't even know what she was doing here.

Kelly's eyes widened and she blushed. "Oh...I left an omni-tool down here from earlier," she lied in a way that wouldn't convince a senile hanar.

"But you haven't even _been _down he-"

"Bye Ken!" she skipped off again before the interrogation could continue, and Kenneth stared after her, helpless.

_Why does everyone think that 'omni-tool' excuse works on me?_

* * *

**SSV Perugia, 2183 - Battle of the Citadel**

Sovereign was shattered, and the people of the galaxy roared in triumph, as one. Great shards of the hulking nightmare littered the endless nebula, accompanying waves and waves of corpses that drifted around the remains of vanquished ships. Gabby stared breathlessly from her station in the Perugia's lowest deck. The geth flagship was still a horror, even in defeat. People all around her were laughing, crying and hugging. An overjoyed Captain Marlowe barked incoherent orders through the intercom, failing to subdue his laughter, but nothing else seemed real to her right now. She could only stand and stare, covered in dirt and sweat, contemplating her mortality.

Gabby was no stranger to combat but this was a brush with death the likes of which she hoped to never experience again. Such devastation, so many annihilated in such a short space of time. Where was Kenneth? Tears stung her eyes. They'd been separated in the commotion as the most damaging blows began rocking the ship. Even in the adrenaline-fuelled elation there were still security personnel extinguishing fires and medics tending to people with horrific burns and shrapnel injuries. Was he hurt? Was he even still alive?

Just as the terrifying thought crossed her mind she felt his hand grasp hers and everything else melted away. He looked as sweaty and dirty as she but there were no signs of injury. She then threw her arms around him and broke down completely, never thinking she could've felt so safe and so _relieved_ in a scene of such carnage. They said nothing; no words needed to be said; the intensity of their embrace expressed enough, but it didn't last long. He broke from her grip, took her hand once again and moved away, pulling her along.

They were by the crew lockers, far from the crowds and alone for the first time in days.

Gabby and Ken started shaking and giggling, unable to control themselves, unable look away from each other. It was over. It was over and they were alive. She cupped her hands to his face, lovingly but firmly, as if trying to confirm he was truly real, and he held her with equal concern. Two pairs of brown eyes locked and she found her head moving forward. Her eyes closed. Her heart in was in her throat, anticipating it. His arms locked around her into an even tighter embrace than before. Their lips were an inch apart.

"Donnelly! Daniels! I need you up here immediately!" Marlowe seemed to have regained his composure; at the worst possible time.

Their eyes opened and they sprang apart. The moment was over.

And they had never talked about it.


	4. Progress

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Zaeed's Room**

Zaeed's quarters were far from the most inviting Kenneth had seen. The two men were stood in what looked like a standard Alliance frigate storage room, except it was decorated with the kind of trinkets that could only have been accumulated by two decades of utter madness. Lining every surface were models of famous ships missing or infamously destroyed, rusted and twisted bullets both used and unused, armour segments pried from dead victims, weapons that were common, exotic and completely unknown and ammo types that ranged from the efficient to the downright cruel. Kenneth observed the trophies and dared not enquire about any details; he didn't want any part of his anatomy joining them.

_Might as well force a stab at generic conversation, as long as it doesn't earn me a not-so-generic stab from this guy._

"I um…like what you've done with the p-"

Zaeed cleared his throat and Kenneth flinched, wondering if the man could do anything that wasn't nerve-wracking. Two irregular eyes were now on him.

_Oh merciful Lord if you're up there, protect me from this madman and all his rusty instruments of death, that I may one day die with dignity without a spike up my ar- _

"Now then!" Zaeed growled, pacing up and down before his motionless guest like a lion ogling the last portion of gazelle. "Sit down, doesn't matter what on, long as you don't break anything." The battle-hardened veteran leaned against a bulkhead. "And grab a drink," he demanded with a wave of his tattooed right arm.

"You…" Kenneth's voice was almost an octave higher and a decibel quieter. He cleared his throat and tried to start again. "Wanted me to fix s-something, right?"

Kenneth tried to think of something that matched this theory. What the hell was there to fix? Had the old man's portable refrigerator broken down from storing too many severed heads? Was the deck monitor stuck on Grunt's private toilet? Maybe Jessie had reached menopause?

Nothing in what was left of the mercenary's face hinted at needing help.

_Better not ask about Jessie, Ken. _If he lived to be a thousand years old he would never forget Grunt's cry of agony coming from this very room when the krogan had knocked her over. Unfortunately for Kenneth, small-talk would have to wait as Zaeed saw through this false incredulity and addressed him with a no-nonsense directness rarely seen outside of turian boot camps.

"Have a goddamn drink and cut the crap son, we're here to talk about _you. _You and the girl crying her eyes out in there," he jerked his head towards the Engine Room.

Kenneth cringed, did the whole ship know about his sad little crush?

With considerable reluctance, Kenneth stepped over to the windowsill, snapped up a brightly-coloured bottle of God-knows-what and took a timid sip. He spluttered and his throat burned; it had a metallic taste and strangely familiar texture.

"The hell kind of a drink do you call this?" For a scarce moment, Kenneth's anger at being prompted to drink such a beverage overpowered his fear and he turned back to Zaeed waving the container in disgust.

Upon turning around he saw Zaeed stood in front of his small refrigerator with a bottle of ordinary Zakera-brewed beer in his hands. Something told him he had misinterpreted the mercenary's words.

"Drink?" the veteran said, scarred features forming a perplexed frown. "That's a good luck charm I picked up on Kahje ten years ago. Fermented hanar semen."

Ken howled and spluttered, trying to bring up the swallowed contents while Zaeed cackled. He should have known this was going to happen; just over a minute in Massani's quarters and he'd ingested almost as much jellyfish juice as a Fornax starlet on a good working day.

"Just kidding!" the mercenary roared, "but you owe me a new can of rifle polish. S'alright," he added when he saw Kenneth's terrified face. "That stuff ain't lethally poisonous, just watch your bowels for the next coupla days."

Zaeed tore the bottle cap off with discoloured teeth and in an amazing display of accuracy, spat it straight into the ship's garbage disposal. Marksmanship seemed to translate into every part of life for a man like Zaeed. Kenneth wouldn't be surprised if the older man constantly saw Vido Santiago's face in the toilet bowl. Not forgetting the need to drink that always accompanied romantic advice among their species and gender, Zaeed pulled out another bottle and threw it to a very grateful Kenneth who slumped onto the floor against the wall and gulped it down, glad to wash the metallic taste out of his mouth. This was as far as Zaeed was prepared to go with hosting formalities and he cut to the chase.

"Y'know," he grunted, "I'm not one for all this sentimental romantic shit but I gotta say…she's a standout young lady, that Gabby." He pointed a coarse finger at Kenneth who curled up at the sight of it. "You should be looking out for her."

"Why would you of all people say that?"

Kenneth hadn't expected this at all. And knowing Zaeed's incredibly low tolerance for dishonesty and topic evasion, Kenneth almost wished he _had _been summoned to discuss Jessie's rusty machinery.

Zaeed, on the other hand, was irritated by Kenneth's assumption that a man couldn't make any accurate emotional observations just for being a grizzled, partially-insane war veteran. But glad to have at last forced some straight and coherent conversation on the subject.

"Why would I of all people say that? Because when she came down here just after you two had your big fight, I went out into the corridor, said 'hello' and she grabbed me by the throat, pinned me against the wall and said that if I didn't immediately piss off she'd stick the deck intercom so far up my arse the Reapers would be hearing my 'silent but deadlies' in dark space."

Kenneth could relate to this. He recalled receiving a similar threat from Gabby the last time he observed that her accent sounded like it changed every five minutes. He wasn't alone in this opinion but no matter how hard he pleaded his case, she still wasn't having any of it.

Zaeed slapped his gauntleted hands together and prompted yet another sharp flinch from Kenneth. Only Zaeed Massani would be so impressed by an act of unprovoked violence.

_Try to relax Kenbo, he isn't gonna hurt you…probably. We're just talking about women. That's right, not krogan warlords or dropping the soap in a batarian prison shower or how to kill a man with a lunch tray. Just women…mysterious, terrifying, unconquerable women._

"It takes _guts_ to say something like that to a man like me, son," Zaeed growled, cutting off Kenneth's train of thought. "It takes real character. The person in that room, wasting time at her terminal and coming up with various ways to dismember you right now is no goddamn doormat." He balled his tattooed fist and his face hardened even more. "She's one helluva girl! And I should know."

He had that horrible misted stare again in his eyes again. Kenneth could only imagine the kind of stories Zaeed would have about dating. And sure enough...

"Buddy and I went on a double date once with these asari twins. Mine was Melphyria. Good head on her shoulders, really understood how things worked. And a real beauty, she was as well…pair of tits you could kill for!" He leaned forward and grabbed each side of his armour's chest plate to emphasise the point. "Which is kind of fitting actually, considering I _did _kill for them a few times over the next coupla months."

Zaeed then grinned and let out a surprisingly emotive sigh. "Remember the first time I saw her...sat in Chora's Den, black dress that hid very little, 'love' and 'hat' tattooed on her hands."

"Hat?"

"She'd lost a finger in a knife fight."

"Oh."

Another memory, one of the more pleasant ones in that battered head cropped up and Zaeed licked his scarred lips. "Not to mention the _sex_ was…"

With this, Kenneth discovered difficulty of doing the 'Lalalala, I'm not listening' routine with one hand in your pocket and the other holding a beer. That was more of Zaeed than he had everwanted to visualise.

"What happened to her?" he enquired, eager to postpone the Gabby talk for as long as possible.

"Bitch sold me out to the Blood Pack." Zaeed spat, draining his bottle and staring out of the window. Both men began to contemplate the usefulness of this tale, but unlike Kenneth, Zaeed wasn't paralysed with fear, which enabled him to be quicker on the uptake.

"I know what you're thinking and you're right, that isn't the best example but hell, I'm glad I went for it. Didn't work out but fuck me if I ever turn too chickenshit to try."

Kenneth didn't find any of this reassuring.

_What's this guy trying to say? Better to have loved and lost when the bitch tried to have you killed by a Terminus gang than never to have loved at all? There's too much he doesn't know. The Perugia! How am I going to explain the Per-_

"But remember this," Zaeed pointed at him again, "I may have enjoyed two months of bliss doing the horizontal monster mash with a hot asari but that Gabby's a girl who knows her way around an engine, can throttle a merc in the blink of an eye and despite these skills _isn't_ the type to sell you out to heavily-armed krogan and their arse-kissing vorcha. Those are some pretty unique qualities son." Zaeed's voice was almost gentle. "She's a real keeper."

He tossed the empty bottle into the garbage disposal and didn't meet Kenneth's eyes. "Don't wanna spend your life thinking of someone and what could've been with them," he muttered, half to himself and now submerged in the most painful recollection of all. A gauntleted hand caressed the most unsightly scar on his face.

"Like you and Vido?" asked Kenneth. The words slipped out before any semblance of common sense could restrain them.

Zaeed's lopsided eyes snapped towards him and widened, making Kenneth contemplate smashing open the window, leaping out and holding his breath until he reached the nearest atmosphere. He fancied his chances better that way.

_Shit, _he thought, _I've touched a nerve._

Zaeed stiffened and he stroked his armour's built-in holster, still not taking those eyes off him. The holster was empty but Kenneth found the gesture provocative enough.

_I've squeezed a nerve!_

Zaeed marched towards him.

_I've danced the fucking Macarena on a nerve!_

"Yeah, that's right," whispered Zaeed. They were almost nose-to-nose. "Like me and Vido. I may have wanted to kill the son of a bitch, and yeah, I admit it; I'm glad Shepard talked me out of it. But with Vido dead or alive, my biggest regret was walking around with a chip on my shoulder for twenty goddamn years and letting it control everything."

He spat on the floor. "It was a choice between putting a bullet in him and realising I had let myself reach the point where I had nothing else left to live for, or letting him go and saving a whole refinery thanks to the one man who made me realise that there are better things to pursue than credits and revenge. Not all of us get a chance to meet someone like Shepard. And not all of us get a chance with someone like Gab. Now I'm not gonna force you into this, you're a big boy now. I'm not gonna shoot you if you don't make the bloody move-"

Kenneth furiously fought the urge to let out a massive sigh of relief that would probably send Zaeed flying away from him.

"But don't you _dare _moan for the next two decades if you chicken out of happiness now. Can't say I didn't tell ya, we'll leave it at that."

Zaeed backed off and gave the momentarily stunned Kenneth a chance to consider this. The Scotsman stared at the floor.

"Deep," Kenneth muttered with an impressed raise of his eyebrows.

"Don't look so shocked!" snapped Zaeed, though he was actually smiling now. "Now piss off. I gotta find that old Monopoly box." He shuffled towards the largest crate and began rummaging around inside it.

"Don't thank me!" he added, as if reading minds was another learned mercenary skill. "Just remember what I said. Man up, take it or leave it."

Kenneth nodded and left without another word. Even if he'd bothered bringing up the Perugia, Zaeed would never consider 'missing the perfect moment' an adequate excuse. He was grateful for the old man's efforts and needed no convincing that someone like Gabby would make some man very, very happy one day; he just wasn't sure that man was him. She deserved so much more. Then again, would it really be so harmful to pursue a wild shot in the dark? How else would he know? If he was proven wrong and she didn't reciprocate, all he had to do was endure several months of awkward, silent suicide mission work hoping not to survive the final battle and then if he survived, get a Cerberus transfer to the arse-end of nowhere where he would never have to look her in the face again. If he was proven right and she did reciprocate then they could finally...

There was still so much to consider. He'd been through too much today; pissing off Gabby and Garrus, looking unprofessional in front of Shepard, giving Hawthorne, Hadley, Matthews and Goldstein enough gossip ammunition to last a year, alerting Kasumi and Kelly to feelings he would rather keep hidden. And then there was that madman and his krogan sidekick, when had this become a ship-wide intervention? And why would Zaeed want to teach Grunt how to choke a man to death with a Monopoly piece when krogan have perfectly good hands for the job?

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

"What did Mad-Eye Massani want?" Gabby inquired as she stopped pretending to type. Kenneth had just entered the room looking like a man readying himself for the firing squad. He stopped and stared.

This was getting silly. She'd overreacted to a sincere, protective, older brother-like gesture just because it happened to have come from a witty, loyal yet unobtainable man and now the whole SR-2 was in uproar. He still wasn't completely off the hook for his childishness, but at least now she understood why he'd confronted Garrus in such a harsh way. She'd taken part in a shouting match with most of the ship watching and then acted like a bitch when he'd tried to apologise. All because some stupid rumour had almost revealed her sad little crush.

_Damn scuttlebutt. I'll __**kill **__Matthews if I find out this was his doing again._

With a stab of guilt, Gabby realised that he must have apologised to Shepard and Garrus by now and she still hadn't allowed him to do the same to her so they could put a pin on this debacle and move on. No wonder he looked so tense.

Kenneth pulled a strange face; equal parts amused at her quip and surprised at her willingness to instigate conversation.

"Air conditioning," he said. "Gardener's upstairs cooking so he wasn't available to...you know." His voice trailed off, but he felt that it had been a convincing enough lie. He remained motionless, waiting for her approval to further the conversation.

Gabby knew she needed to help relieve the tension somehow before normality could resume. Good old normality where they could pass the time with worn-out sci fi and fantasy RPG jokes along with the occasional bout of engine-based light flirting, all the while pretending nothing had happened on the Perugia. Maybe that was what she'd have to do with this latest incident; just give it the 'Perugia treatment.'

"Bounty hunters!" Kenneth suddenly snarled in the best English accent he was capable of projecting. "We don't need their scum!"

A smile crossed her tired features. Ken duplicated it and walked to his own terminal. From the corner of her eye she could see that his typing was every bit as fake as hers. He'd been gone only a little while but Gabby's time in here, sobbing like a teenager had been the loneliest of her life. Kelly may have spent little time on this deck with them but her words were solid. Gabby could never hate him no matter how hard she tried.

"Gab," he croaked, holding her gaze even in the corner of her eye. "I'm sorry." He had never sounded more sincere, more regretful.

"It's alright," she whispered, voice lowered by the rush of warm relief flooding through her. The swirling colours of the Drive Core were beautiful again; they almost lived up to his smile. An impulse of momentary madness seized her and everything repressed for the last two years fought against their restraints like caged dogs.

_Maybe he does feel something, maybe Kelly was suggesting what you think she was suggesting. Quit stalling! Take the damn shot in the dark already girl! How else will you know?_

She turned her whole body towards him and took a deep breath.

"Dinnertime! C'mon everybody!" chirped Kelly over the intercom.

Gabby's face burned and the impulse sank back behind its veil of fear and hesitancy. Kenneth looked equally pissed at the announcement. Facing the crew would be a nightmare, but the duo left the Engine Room knowing that with their differences resolved it would now at least be a bearable nightmare.

They joined Zaeed in the elevator and started up their well-practiced routine of avoiding his creepy, wandering eyes. Zaeed was holding a tattered black and orange cardboard box but Gabby didn't raise the subject. She didn't want to end up fitting in it, and Kenneth seemed especially jittery. But then again Gabby wouldn't have been surprised if the air conditioning that her friend had seen to was maintaining a collection of severed heads and pirated krogan testicles.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Mess Hall**

Kelly may have been a people person, but there was nothing ordinary about the Normandy SR2's people. She had insisted on timetabled mealtimes seating as many off-duty crewmembers as possible. After some insistent persuasion, Shepard agreed to allow this in the name of morale. Though whether it was to help or hinder morale was still something of a mystery to many.

Kelly's intentions were always honourable and her optimism plentiful, but even the best nuggets of wisdom taken from her psychology course did little to prevent the day-in-day-out volatility of breakfast, lunch and dinner on the SR-2. Jack had yet to attend a single one, Mordin's one hour of sleep, high work-ethic and minimal food intake made social interaction difficult and Miranda had shut herself in her office for every meal since Grunt had crushed Jacob's hand in a game of Irish Snap a fortnight ago. She'd seen Jacob soak up plenty of injuries during their operations together, but didn't appreciate having chilli sauce splashed in her eyes while it happened. That and Shepard's one-man drinking marathon to test his upgrades had sent her packing from any of Kelly's crew-bonding initiatives. Even Joker preferred eating at the helm while arguing with EDI over sanitation rules these days.

Gabby, Ken and Zaeed arrived to find Kasumi, Kelly, Jacob, Shepard, Garrus, Patel, Rolston, Grunt and worst of all; Hawthorne and Hadley (dubbed the 'Glorified Fratboys' by Miranda) seated and eating. Zaeed held up the tattered box and he and Grunt walked over to a smaller table in the room's far corner where they re-assembled the surface to accommodate food trays and a game of _**Monopoly: Omega Edition. **_

Rolston and Patel ceased their quiet chatting to offer Gabby and Ken polite, if rather patronising smiles as the engineering duo joined the table. They hoped the others would leave them alone and focus on their own eccentricities. A momentary scan of the table gave some positive signs. Kelly seemed to consider a moment she wasn't draped around Shepard a moment wasted, Kasumi was making Jacob very uncomfortable under the intensity of her gaze, Garrus nodded to them and did nothing for the next few minutes but poke at his food trying to instigate conversation with Shepard, which was proving difficult for the Commander with Kelly always nipping at his ear.

Hawthorne and Hadley on the other hand looked as though Christmas had come early this year. Thank goodness Goldstein and Matthews were still on duty, it would've been a massacre.

"I say, Hadley?" Hawthorne said in a loud, ostentatious voice to the smirking man sat beside him.

"What is it, my good chum Mr. Hawthorne?" responded Hadley in a manner just as cartoonish.

"I'm currently writing a splendid book on nineteen seventies glam rock bands and cosmetics!" boomed Hawthorne.

Everyone stared at the two men nonplussed, but Gabby and Ken were the first to figure out where this was going. They had no idea what exactly the punch line would be, but it was on its way.

"Really?" said Hadley. "How fascinating! What's it called?"

Gabby closed her eyes and braced herself. Kenneth pretended to be too fixated on his baked potato to listen. What was it with this crew and all the late twentieth century references?

"It's called _KISS and makeup! _And it's about-"

"So Garrus!" Shepard said forcefully. Hawthorne and Hadley looked disappointed to have their fun cut short but weren't about to cross the Commander. "There's one thing you never explained to me. Why were you only given fifteen hours to investigate Saren?"

Garrus set down his spoon and laughed. "Actually, it's a pretty funny story. You see, I had just-"

"Scuse me!" Kenneth groaned. He leapt to his feet and ran to the bathroom clutching his stomach. Zaeed wasn't kidding about the rifle polish.

Awkward silence reared its ugly head again.

"Don't mind him," Zaeed growled from the corner. "Accidentally ingested some of my rifle polish earlier. Makes 'em get a bit edgy."

At this, Gabby's embarrassment was overridden by fear. Was Kenneth alright? What on earth had happened in Zaeed's quarters?

From the other side of the room Grunt set down his ladle and examined the small card in his hand.

_**For pinching Aria's backside you have your teeth removed and two limbs broken. Miss a turn. **_

"Dammit!" he yelled, making every seated crewmember that had not seen combat jump. "When will this thing pick up in my favour?"

Zaeed just chuckled and swept up a handful of paper credit chits as Hadley followed his friend's example by making a second attempt to milk this situation for all it was worth.

"So, I'm on the extranet reading this Star Trek fanfiction about Scotty and some chick he knew at Academy, and it suddenly occurred to me that-"

"What're you teaching him this time Zaeed?" Shepard asked, interrupting what would have been a strangely accurate joke and pausing one of Kelly's aggressive games of footsie.

"Constant vigilance?" Rolston muttered, much to the amusement of the table.

"Don't get cute kid!" Zaeed roared, brandishing a fork maliciously. Rolston cowered just like Kenneth had and Zaeed's roughly-shaped head swivelled back to the Commander. He wondered if every man in Cerberus reacted the same to insincere threats. "To answer your question Shepard, this is the Omega edition of that Monopoly chestnut. Picked it up back in the late sixties from this sneaky salarian bootlegger who..."

Gabby appreciated Shepard's attempts to keep the conversation off of the five ton elephant in the room. One only needed to ask Zaeed a simple question to get a long, macabre story out of him. Her mind was still a terribly disorganised mass of emotions, memories and failed attempts to rationalise everything. She just wanted to call it a day, go to sleep, dream of an alternative Battle of the Citadel aftermath and carry on with the old routine. There was still so much to consider.

But EDI's message changed the surreal tone of the evening.

"Commander, the Illusive Man wishes to speak with you immediately regarding a potential Collector attack."

Everyone rose and returned to their stations as if waking from a long sleep. Sometimes it was easy to forget the serious demands of a suicide mission and get lost in all the craziness that it gave birth to.

Kasumi ignored the sudden, panicked mobilisation of the people around her, remaining calm, dignified and seated, finishing her ramen. She'd had her fill of Jacob-staring for the day and was disappointed in Kelly for failing to spot the tracking device which was now back in the hands of its owner.

_I overestimated you Kelly. A pity, I finally thought I'd encountered some worthy competition. Badly-timed heartfelt speeches aren't going to cut it with those two honey._

With any luck, she'd spot the distraction device that was now planted just beneath her badge and then the _real _fun could begin.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 2, CIC**

Kasumi was pleased to find Kelly's terminal unguarded. The redhead had rushed off the elevator back onto the third deck asking for a change of clothes due to a coffee stain on the front of her shirt. This was particularly odd considering she hadn't noticed anyone spilling it on her, and she had been careful enough with her own beverages despite sharing numerous and eager bouts of fondling with the Commander. The yeoman hadn't even noticed the large brown spot until she'd headed back to her station. It was almost as if her Cerberus personnel badge had been leaking.

Shepard was no doubt in the conference room discussing this alert with the Illusive Man in raised voices. EDI was transmitting Horizon's location to Joker and everyone else was too absorbed in their own work to notice the hooded Japanese woman vanishing under a tactical cloak and hacking into Kelly's psych reports.

_Ugh, when's she gonna get rid of that KellyGrrl username?_

The master thief let out a small but triumphant noise when the desired information came up, accompanied by a large and telling image gallery.

_They served on the Perugia together huh? Awwwww look how happy they were! I wonder what I can make of this._

* * *

**Credit goes to Stormy-B for the Zaeed double date idea.**


	5. Friendship

**Normandy SR-2, Engineer's Quarters**

Gabby woke with a start in her room. She'd heard a strange noise; too quiet to be one of Grunt's and too low-pitched to be one of Jack's. Zaeed would probably have needed to lose a few limbs before letting any of the crew know he was in pain, which only left one person. She hastily got up and dressed. A quick glance at her bedside alarm clock showed Horizon was still eight hours away.

Gabby slipped out of the tiny bedroom and crept across the panels, metal refreshing and cool against her bare feet. The ship's Engineering Quarters consisted of a pair of adjacent bedrooms located in a small, low-ceilinged corridor just below the main Engineering Deck, accessible via trap door and unfolding staircase. Ship designers of all species kept power and propulsion engineers right by their stations in the event of an emergency; as nobody wanted to rely on galactic-standard elevator speed and functionality when their vessel was on fire or being torn apart by mercenaries.

She reached Ken's room, hoping he was alright and looking forward to finally having some proper time alone with him, but his door was open and the room was empty. Where was he? Gabby had come downstairs and fallen asleep before Kenneth had even left the bathroom on Deck 3, though not until Dr. Chakwas had promised her that he'd be fine and in bed within the hour. A second, louder noise then revealed his location and condition. He was still vomiting.

The corridor's only other room was Grunt's personal bathroom, which would have been a problem for the duo were it not for Ken's ingenious solution of rerouting a small electronics grid powering Joker's extranet porn downloads to a round-the-clock air freshener. Even EDI had been impressed by this; as Joker only lost three per cent download speed and the rancid smell of digested varren steaks was been kept at bay by a wide range of far more pleasant aromas. However, using the toilet if you were anybody but Grunt was not such a wise move.

"Kenneth?" she hissed, knocking on the closed bathroom door, praying that Grunt wouldn't overhear them. How good were krogan ears anyway? It was difficult to tell with body parts that weren't visible.

After a worryingly violent bout of unintelligible gagging and cursing, she heard him wipe his mouth and hit the floor with a soft thud.

"Whoizzit?" Kenneth moaned. Her stomach turned, he sounded terrible.

"Fashion Police!" she said in the deepest voice possible. "We've come for your ceremonial kilt!"

She heard him guffaw, then giggle like a madman, then vomit even harder. She wondered about what ingredients had gone into making Zaeed's rifle cleaner.

_Maybe 'waxing goddamn nostalgic' means what I think it means._

"That kilt was a gift from my mah, Gab," Kenneth croaked upon recovery.

"Hey I inherited a hideous birthmark from _my_ dear old mother," she countered, "doesn't mean I wanna keep it."

"Oh? Maybe I'll have to take a look," he purred.

Gabby laughed, both flattered and nervous. "Careful you, don't make me sue for sexual harassment!"

She knew they were joking, and that he was likely delirious with fever at this point, but nonetheless wished he wouldn't talk like that. He had no idea how it affected her.

_Just a joke Gab, just a joke. You don't need any more false hope in your life._

Yet another fit of choking and coughing followed. She felt like suing Chakwas for malpractice, as for that Zaeed…

_Forget the Reapers; it'll be the __**Protheans**__ hearing them when I'm finished with you!_

"You're sure it was rifle polish?" she asked for the fifth time. It was so much easier to ask constant questions from outside a toilet while he hurled his guts into the bowl now that the crew and their suggestive smiles and 'aaaaawwws' were out of the picture. A terrifying thought then came to her.

"Kenneth I..." how could she tell him? They'd just made up and this was a reason for him to never speak to her again. "What if you were poisoned intentionally?"

He snickered. "I know the guy's nuttier than squirrel shit Gab, but why would he do that?"

She took a deep breath. "Before I dropped my omni-tool chip I _kind of-_"

"Choked him and threatened to perform a Sony-sponsored colonoscopy?" Ken asked.

So Zaeed had indeed told him. "Yeah," she felt crippling guilt. "What if he hurt you to get back at me?"

Kenneth actually laughed at this. "It wasn't like that. Zaeed's actually a pretty good guy."

"But Ken-"

"No _really _Gab. He's a good guy beneath all the scars and crazy." Kenneth sounded oddly insistent. She wondered how ten minutes of seeing to the air conditioning could have so altered Ken's opinion of the old man so much. Maybe the delirium was taking full effect.

"Ken, I'm calling Dr. Chakwas down, you're really sick." She reached up for the trapdoor's handle and switched on her omni-tool.

"No!" he protested.

"We've got a mission in a few hours, you think this is normal?" She fought the temptation to bring up the memory of carrying him back to his dorm after the Tech Academy graduation party or the Scottish drinking stereotypes that had for so long made them laugh together.

Her omni tool beeped at the arrival of a new message.

**- Chakwas won't help. She'll just say 'stay away from solid foods' blah blah blah -**

Stubborn and frustrating as ever. Gabby clenched her teeth but responded in kind.

**- This again? Why can't you just talk? - **

_Talk to me Kenneth! Tell me things that so far have only existed in my mind!_

**- Can't talk, puking. -**

She shook her head but couldn't resist typing the response.

**- Yeah, puking…is…BAD -**

Gabby heard a shout of laughter that reverberated in the toilet bowl**.**

**- Unhelpful RPG references? That's my girl! -**

**- Don't read too deeply into this Ken - **

**- Why? -**

**- That was a one-off. If we carry on with this exchange you'll just end up ranting for hours about how all the **_**Genesis **_**characters got hit with the ugly stick for their Drake Era II cameos -**

This time a shocked gasp came through the door.

**- That was a crime against humanity Gabby! And turianity…and quarianity, whoever plays the game. And the "you look different/don't we all?" in-joke doesn't excuse it! -**

As much as she agreed with this observation, Gabby turned off her omni-tool and sat down on the floor, head resting against the bathroom door. She wanted to stay up talking for quite a bit longer, but not about why saving one city state isn't as impressive as saving a whole country, or why Flanders had turned all whiney and preachy. Plus there was still the issue of Grunt, who for all she knew was waiting above them, ready to pounce. Zaeed may have retreated like a frightened little mouse at her last threat, but it would probably take more than the promise to quarter Grunt's quad if she wanted to keep the krogan at bay. She then heard Kenneth power down his own tool and knew that for once he had picked up on one of her signals.

"We um...didn't have a chance to talk in the Engine Room earlier did we?" he was still tired and sick, but his speech was less slurred this time. There was no jesting in his voice.

"You're my best friend Gab, I'd _never _do that to you intentionally I was just," he snorted at his own folly, "I'd like to say 'looking out for your best interests' but..."

She heard his head rest against the door and knew he was mirroring her pose. It was an affectionate move.

"I know Kenny. You don't have to say any more. I still owe you for what you did for me back at Academy, remember?" She grinned; she'd never forget the day Captain Marlowe learned the consequences of messing with the best friend of Kenneth Donnelly.

"It was nothing," he said. "You'd've done the same for me."

_Dammit why can't we talk to each other like this face-to-face?_

She reached out and pressed her hand to the door, wishing she could touch him again; turn back the clock two years and correct her mistake.

"Ken _please, _if you won't listen to the doctor at least-"

The door opened and their faces, which had been propped against it, jerked forward, almost colliding. They stood up, feeling ridiculous.

"I think that's all of it" he said, patting his stomach and trying to smile through a pale, clammy visage. "Better out than in: like Marlowe and Udina in an escape pod."

She tried to smile, but hated seeing him in this state.

"No worries, I can make my own way to bed this time Mum," he said with a wink.

This was a surprise. "You remember the graduation afterparty? You were the most wasted one there!"

Kenneth reddened, looked at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't, I just...remembered waking up in a comfy bed _without _a permanent marker dick on my face, next to a bottle of hangover medicine and knew that there was only one person who'd do that for someone like me. So I guess- oh!"

She leapt forward and cut off his words with a bone-crushing hug. Only his surprise delayed responding in kind and for a few, precious moments they simply stood there, unmoving save for a gentle rocking motion.

"G'night Kenny," she breathed. "You sure you'll be-"

"I'll be fine, Gab. Remember: downing various cleaning products is a standard employment initiation in my country."

She giggled and let him go.

Gabby collapsed back into bed and her tired eyes flicked over the room's only photograph. The two of them were grinning and giving a corny thumbs up, attired in their custom-made 'I survived the Battle of the Citadel and all I got was this lousy shirt' shirts. They were so proud, so hopeful on that day. The feeling hadn't returned until they'd boarded the SR-2, which she remembered as if it were yesterday.

After several thrilling hours of examining everything the deck had to offer in ways that grew more competitive with each moment, along with exhausting their repertoires of appropriate pop culture references and Academy memories, the duo had settled in and felt truly at home for the first time in two years. Sharing the deck with a krogan, crazy woman and a man who had likely seen his first combat at the Alamo was a challenge. Gabby remembered how Grunt demanded Kenneth tell him the meaning of the word 'peachy' and the less said about their first meeting with Jack the better, but the thought that they would always be looking out for each other was more than a comfort. Many monotonous or worry-filled nights in her room had been brightened up by their idle chatter through the thin wall.

When considering it further, Gabby was kind of glad he couldn't recall that night after graduation, especially the kiss on the forehead she'd snuck in while tucking him into the bed.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room **

Horizon was only an hour away when they woke again and the grim, duty-bound stoicism drubbed into all good Alliance personnel seized them as they reached their posts. Personal feelings aside they knew the importance of their mission; but it was the tremendous risk involved with the SR-2's endeavour that was keeping their minds on little more each other these days.

* * *

**I know canonically Gabby and Ken are most likely to sleep in the Crew Quarters on the third deck, but in an emergency you'd need power and propulsion seen to immediately, right? **

**The photograph was inspired by a superb piece of fanart by the talented rabbitzoro depicting the same, only with suicide mission shirts (and no cheesy thumbs up)**


	6. Changes

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room – Battle of Horizon**

Gabby and Ken gripped their terminals, knuckles white and faces focused. It turned out Horizon would be a groundside campaign, but when faced with possible Reaper technology that could change in a heartbeat. They stared eagle-eyed at the hologram of the hulking Collector Ship, checking for any signs of change or movement, fearful of even blinking. A premature take-off launched by the enemy would mean an emergency extraction of Shepard and the team. Such a feat would be impossible without pinpoint timing and execution, and then they would have to either reach the Mass Relay first or do battle. Despite the proficiency of the SR-2 and its staff, not to mention a universally-shared hatred of the Reapers and their insect-like puppets, adequate standards for upgrades that would allow a direct confrontation with the Collectors were not yet reached. They still had yet to install either the Thanix Canon or Silaris Armour, meaning that right now the Normandy was little more than a big target with only a slightly better arsenal that its predecessor.

The enemy ship stuck out from the verdant green surface like an unsightly cancerous growth, plunging the colony into shadow. Even in a miniaturised form it was a hideous creation; every bit as unnatural and enigmatic as Sovereign had been, a bastardised union or organic and synthetic material from a time best forgotten. Kenneth felt a mixture of fear and disgust as he watched the monstrosity curse the planet with its very presence. So many helpless people were trapped within its walls and unless the team did their job right, so many more would be taken. As he glanced to his side he saw that Gabby wore the same expression that she'd adopted moments before the Perugia had cleared the Arcturus Relay en route to the climax of the Geth War.

Gabby and Ken's training and talent was almost unmatched and they had no shortage of faith in the abilities of their Commander and his team, but nothing could have prepared them for the rush of familiarity and excitement felt when at last the real enemy revealed themselves for another fight. They solemnly thought of Sovereign's victims – tens of thousands of good, selfless men and women slaughtered for no other reason than existing. They thought of the betrayal of the glorious dead by the Alliance and Council, who became eager to bury everything that would have made that sacrifice worthwhile. They thought of all the colonists who now suffered because of this incompetence. Kenneth's face was still white and his temperature high but nothing would keep him from this assignment. This was exactly why they had joined Cerberus. Everyone stolen, terrorised and killed, human or not, would be avenged.

_They sure as hell aren't taking you Gabby._

Gabby and Ken waited and watched as the ground team tore through Horizon below. Shepard had taken Garrus, Jack and Kasumi, who to her annoyance had promised an insistent, almost tearful Kelly that she'd look out for Shepard, while the remaining squad stayed behind statically awaiting orders. All except for Zaeed and Grunt, who kept up their bizarre routine of simple and seemingly banal board games which always hid some deeper, darker meaning or symbolised a grisly life lesson that Zaeed would share in no less than twenty minutes with anyone who couldn't get away quick enough. Unfortunately for Jacob; 'scissors cuts paper,' meaning the task of telling Miranda she'd be left on the ship for their most important mission yet had fallen to him. Jacob was still unharmed and tending to the weapons in the armoury, but the prospect of the Ice Queen ever being melted was looking miniscule at this point.

"Engineers Donnelly and Daniels: please stand by as I am currently interfacing with the colony's GARDIAN Laser Towers," EDI declared in her cool, ubiquitous voice. They exchanged a determined look. The colonial defence system was top-of-the-line yet untested. Anything could happen, from an explosive backfire that would wipe out the ground team, to a short-circuit that would do nothing to harm the Collector ship at all.

"So we fire up and use the GARDIANS," Kenneth muttered to his friend. "What if that fails?"

"You whip on the old kilt and moon them into surrender," said Gabby, her eyes snapping back to the hologram. "If _that_ fails, I jettison the toilet's contents from last night, sound okay to you?"

"Just another stag party in Glasgow," he said. "Which gives us a plan A, B _and_ C, not bad."

The lasers came online and finally began their pounding of the unwelcome dreadnought. Shards of the Collector Ship flew off, looking small golden sparks in their holographic form. Kenneth felt a surge of pride as he watched the myth of Collector invincibility come to an end. At last they were fighting back. But the moment was short, as a different surge came immediately afterwards; a massive tremor which shook the entire Normandy, almost threw the engineers into Jack's pit on the sub-deck and ruined Zaeed and Grunt's game of Connect Four.

"Guys it's taking off!" This time it was Joker's frantic voice which rang through the room. The tremors intensified, setting off the deck's alarm system. "I'm maximising our kinetic barriers, God help us we may also have to use the Javelins. Kenneth; watch the power draw on the fusion plant."

"Got it," said Kenneth as he uploaded another hologram.

"Gabby," continued Joker, "keep an eye on the antiporons' aft exhaust port. If we have to use evasive manoeuvres they'll get a hell of a kick and this _really_ isn't the time or place to stall the engine."

"Done," she said, beginning a diagnostic of the ship's thrusters and preparing for the worst.

"Oh and Kenneth, one more thing," Joker added.

"What?"

"No matter what happens…Gabby wuvs you!"

Gabby's face reddened as the sound of whooping and high-fives could be heard through the speakers. Kenneth refocused his eyes onto the screens in front of him, trying not to look too bothered by this.

"Twat."

It happened with incredible speed. The colossal eyesore shot upwards, leaving a smoking crater and dozens of shattered buildings in its wake. Kenneth's breath caught in his throat, his hand trembling on the keyboard in anticipation. This was it.

"Gab, we may have to resort to B."

"Have you waxed that zone recently?"

"No."

"All the worse for them." Gabby's wit under fire never ceased to amaze him.

To their surprise, the long-awaited exchange of hypervelocity firepower never came. It seemed the Collectors would rather leave with half a day's work done than risk sticking around having to deal with a damaged hull and pissed off Commander Shepard. The creatures flew straight past the SR-2 and before long were off the ship's sensors, heading straight back to the Omega 4 Relay to lick their wounds and process their findings in gruesome ways. Calm silence returned as the chorus of quakes, beeps and alarms died down.

Gabby laughed derisively. "That's right, run you little bastards!" Their mission was far from over, but the ship was intact and to her relief Kenneth had gotten through it without repainting the room's surfaces with his innards.

"Good news, everyone!" said Mordin over the intercom, sounding more excited than usual. "Seeker Swarm countermeasure consistent, direct combat a success; two thirds of colony saved!"

Kenneth whooped and pounded his terminal. "Consider your daddybags kicked! And here I was thinking we'd have to resort to plan C."

Gabby patted his shoulder. "Maybe next time, Ken." Her voice then turned sweeter, yet much more forceful. "And until that time comes, you'll be in the doc's office, and you _aren't _leaving until you're well again." Ken's hatred of doctors went back to an eventful and most regrettable night during their first semester at Tech Academy but Gabby's tolerance for his excuses was wearing thin.

Kenneth looked like a child hearing a yell of bedtime. "Can I leave early if Chakwas jokes about my nationality?"

"No Kenneth."

"What if she's been indoctrinated by the Reapers?"

"Yes Kenneth."

"What if she performs a faux prostate exam just to see the look on my face?"

"No Kenneth."

"What if she tries to seduce me?"

"Highly unlikely but, yes Kenneth."

"What if she tries to indoctrinate me through a faux prostate exam which is just a front to plant Reaper tech up my-"

"JUST GO DAMMIT!"

He skipped out of the room_._

The battle's immediate aftermath went as expected; Shepard hadn't uttered two words before he was fighting off Kelly, who didn't wait to begin questioning him on the status of his relationship with Ashley Williams. Jack slunk back into her quarters without paying any heed to the adulation, stopping only to once more laugh at Kelly over the 'copper-crotch' gaffe ("man, you Cerberus bitches really crack me up!") and Garrus resumed his saga of uninterrupted calibrating. After three hours of untraceable absence, Kasumi showed up in her room while Kenneth underwent a lengthy medical examination at his best friend's behest. It had been a dampened success. The team had met a vastly larger and more advanced force with no squad casualties, but one third of a Terminus colony locked up and en route to their end. Team building and upgrade gathering would be the only step forward and before the day was through they were Haestrom-bound.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Kasumi's Room**

Kasumi removed the neural implant and placed it back in the drawer.

_I swore to stop doing this all the time Keiji, but you're making it so damn hard._

Her attempts to move past spending all free moments living in the Graybox's memories had partially motivated the wager. The other reason was far more personal.

_I may have lost you Keiji, but I won't let those two miss out on what we had._

The knock at her door was no doubt from Kelly. Kasumi felt like giving up on hoping her friend would ever discover the devices – the vibrant redhead and gone to sleep with four more hidden on her person following her unexpected change of clothes yesterday.

"Come in!"

Kelly entered, looking as dishevelled as she always did whenever Shepard was within five hundred feet. Kasumi leapt backwards onto her bed with silent, dextrous grace and resumed her usual cross-legged sitting position.

"What's up?" the thief asked.

Kelly sat on the leather sofa though remained stiff-backed and missing her usual friendly smile. "I'd like to discuss our little bet," she said.

Kasumi pulled a patronising face and cocked her head to one side. Kelly was never this concise. All the other discussions the yeoman started with her had been preceded by several minutes of small talk on either the wonders of a sustained dalliance with Shepard or asking which memories of Keiji she was most fond of. It seemed her opponent was getting cold feet.

"Aaaawwww," Kasumi crooned. "Only one day into a bout of healthy competition and you want to _discuss _it? What's the matter, can't stand the heat?" Issuing such challenges in a high adrenaline, post-mission environment had been her favourite method for getting a rise out of Keiji. He was never one to back down.

_Don't you disappoint me again Kelly Chambers._

"I think it's time we discussed the priiiiiiiiiiiiiize," Kelly said through a yawn. "Sorry, late night." The yeoman cleared her throat, "the prize of this wager."

"Oh, what brought this on?" Kasumi's look was playful yet challenging.

"Let's cut to the chase, how much money?"

There it was again. That abrupt, no-nonsense tone. Kasumi knew that right now getting Gabby and Ken together was like convincing a volus to perform a striptease on Therum and accomplishing such an act would no doubt leave the successful matchmaker wanting something more than bragging rights, but what had brought about the change in Kelly's demeanour?

"How about we start with the cost of my shirt?" Kelly folded her arms and leaned back, though her expression was anything but relaxed.

_Yes!_

"What an unusual place to start at," Kasumi said with her best attempt at incredulity.

"Not really," Kelly said, idly stroking her brand new Cerberus personnel badge. "Especially considering what Mess Sergeant Gardener told me about that strange 'coffee stain' which somehow ruined my last one. Along with one of our washing machines."

"Honey, you're not making any sense." Kasumi wished she had more opportunities in life to play dumb.

Kelly pointed at her badge. "You used a distraction device," she said in a blunt, impatient tone. "It struck me as rather underhanded."

"We didn't go over any detailed rules," Kasumi said in her defense. "You're in a bet with a thief, what did you expect? Anyway you lied! You went straight down there to Gabby. Booty call with Shepard my ass!"

Kelly frowned.

"No pun intended," Kasumi added, though this was not the cause of Kelly's frown.

"Never mind the pun, how did you know I was...you put a _tracking device _on me too?" she cried.

Kasumi shrugged, letting that trademark mischievous grin spread over her face. "All's fair in love, war and galactic extinction cycles."

_And you're getting plenty of the former._

"I can't believe you'd resort to that!"

"You gave a sappy speech, that's the oldest trick in the book!" Kasumi hadn't needed a device of any kind to figure that out.

Kelly didn't pursue the argument; if Kasumi wanted to go this far then fine.

"There's something else," she said. "Shepard just got three more dossiers and a distress call from the Illusive Man. We're going straight after Tali on Haestrom. Joker's headed for the Relay right now."

This would be a most interesting development. "Scared Miss Chambers?"

"Of course not. Tali's going to be spending all her time down there with them and it won't be long before she realises those two need to be locked up until they realise they're in love. Who knows, this game may even end up with a third participant. If Tali wants to play along I'm fine with it."

"Then we'll just have to put the wager's prize at whichever cost covers one Cerberus shirt and one ruined distraction device which comes to," Kasumi checked her omni-tool's calculator. "Seventy-eight credits."

_No way is it gonna stay that low._

Kelly stood up and nodded. "Agreed. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to show Shepard why he shouldn't go back to Ashley Williams."

She turned and marched off but then stopped by the open door. "Oh, and I want every one of your devices gone, _period_. Not just the kinds I didn't mention."

Kasumi reluctantly came forward and removed three minuscule devices from Kelly's hair and one from her trousers.

"Oh," said the thief with an awkward expression, "you and Shepard haven't been…intimate in the last twenty-four hours have you?"

Kelly laughed. "Does the Illusive Man watch Box News?"

The tension dissipated and Kelly and Kasumi shared a lengthy bout of giggling, which Kelly from recovered first. "To answer your question; a couple of times," her face changed. This clearly unsettled her. "Why?"

Kasumi breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh...well, in that case it's probably been destroyed. Bye!"

She closed and locked the door, leaving a wide-eyed Kelly standing there.

_No need to tell her that last one was a joke_.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 2, CIC, Crew Workstations – Twenty minutes after The Battle of Haestrom**

"Yes!" Matthews breathed, rubbing his hands together as the mission reports came up on the crew database. "Tali Zorah has arriiiiiiiiived! Do you think she'll be hot?" He looked around to his colleagues Patel, Goldstein, Hawthorne and Joker who were seated nearby at their usual posts. "I bet she'll be hot!"

Patel paused her game of solitaire and tutted. "What is it your obsession with quarians?"

"Why the hell do you even need to ask that?" asked a dumbfounded Hawthorne. "Have you _seen _the quarian body shape? Beautiful! Miranda needs modded genes to fit into modded jeans but with those girls it's all natural!"

"Don't forget the accents!" interjected Matthews, "those lovely girls with their sultry, vaguely eastern-European accents." He sighed dreamily and leaned back in his chair, lost in thought. "They're like Bond villainesses in candy wrappers!"

Goldstein chortled. "How much quarian action has that line got you?"

"None," he admitted, eyes still on the ceiling. "But soon enough none of that'll matter." He leaned over and gave her a nudge. "Lighten up Goldie, weren't you once stationed on Horizon?"

"Yes," she murmured. "But I didn't dodge a fatal bullet so I could spend my days listening to this shit."

Matthews shook his head. "So, so cynical," he stretched and cracked his knuckles. "Mark my words Goldie, before the day is done I'll be up to my eyes in dextro-DNA pie!"

_"You?" _said Hawthorne with cutting disbelief. "I think Tali's a girl who wants a bit of experience and you're hardly the kind of..."

The elevator doors hissed open and two occupants stepped into view.

"Dude!" Hawthorne suddenly gasped. The flamboyant technician lurched forwards and almost fell out of his seat, eyes round as saucers. "Epic hips at twelve o'clock!"

There she was in all her curvaceous glory. She stood at Shepard's side as the Spectre pointed to each part of the deck, giving her a brief summary. But unfortunately for Matthews and Hawthorne, Tali's grand tour of the ship and their grand tour of Tali would have to wait a little longer. A brief, slack-jawed glimpse of the machinist was cut short as Jacob beckoned them into the Briefing Room.

Matthews wolf-whistled. "Oh manthe rumours were true! I'd let my Fleet Migrate into her Flotilla any day."

The others stared at him.

"Y'know…" he said sheepishly, "my sperm?"

"Oh, of course!" said Hawthorne.

Patel stuffed her fingers in her ears, trying to block out the inevitable avalanche of lechery. Why hadn't she possessed Goldstein's intuition and brought a pair of earphones for her omni-tool? Hawthorne then began the inane exchange and his friend gladly met the challenge.

"I'd _Keelah _her _se'lai_!"

"I would _vas _that _Neema!"_

"I'd Traverse her Perseus Veil!"

"I'd probe her dark space!"

"I'd stim those nerves!"

"I'd take her on a _pelvic_ Pilgrimage."

"Guys, will you shut up?"Patel snapped. It turned out fingers in the ears were no match for the raised voices of two young men in heat.

"But who first?" whispered Matthews dramatically, ignoring the woman's protests. Two pairs of eyes narrowed. There was only one way to settle this.

"Rock, paper, scissors, genophage, KROGAN!" they yelled in unison, shaking their hands and forming the appropriate signs.

"_Yes!" _Matthews hissed with a pump of clenched fists and thrust of the hips. "Paper outlaws genophage, seeya later! I'm off to get my vote…" he took a deep breath and stared at the Briefing Room door…"_Tali'd." _

"That doesn't even make any sense!" Patel snapped, enraged at this man's idea of humour.

Matthews rounded on her. "It doesn't have to! I'm about to score, be happy for me!" he marched off, slapping his face and mumbling to himself.

For all the annoyance and reluctant amusement she was feeling, Patel couldn't supress her nagging concern. A high-ranking quarian aboard a Cerberus ship would cause enough tension without Matthews attempting to boldly go where no microbe had gone before. She shifted towards Goldstein, who in turn removed her earphones.

"Does Matthews even know about Cerberus' history with the Migrant Fleet?" she whispered. "You know, the Ascension Project calamity, Miranda's attempt to 'interrogate' Veetor, the constant whispers of spies and sabotage from both sides?"

"I _would _tell him," said Joker from his seat up front. "But c'mon, where's the fun in that?" He swivelled the leather chair, wearing an excited smirk. "Something tells me he needs to find out for himself, however painful and entertaining it may be." The Helmsman then stroked a recently-bandaged wrist. "Plus that high-five he gave me during Horizon was _really _aggressive and I'm not in a very forgiving mood."

"Hey Hawthorne," said Goldstein. "Why didn't Miranda christen Matthews a Glorified Fratboy?"

Hawthorne stroked his chin and racked his memory. "I think she said he's more of an oversized pre-schooler."

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

A disappointing and anticlimactic affair had unfolded at Haestrom; nowhere near as exciting as Horizon. Upon reaching the planet, Gabby and Ken took to their stations itching for another meeting with the geth warships. But the synthetic race's occupation of the former quarian-controlled planet had been so long that for efficiency's sake all time and resources were focused on establishing a strong, fortified groundside force. The only traces of geth ship activity had been signals from infantry and artillery dropships which, thanks to the SR-2's Stealth Systems and use of the Kodiak Drop Shuttle, remained focused on the ground team. Disturbing reports of Haestrom's dying sun forwarded to them by Shepard during the mission also explained the gradual withdrawal of geth from the area, meaning that the role of Gabby and Ken had only been symbolic today.

Gabby set down her Rubik's Cube; an object never before used during an actual military encounter with a known enemy. "Sometimes I wish we weren't aboard such an advanced ship," she sighed. "We just don't have as much to do as we did back in the day."

"Yeah, never thought I'd be this bored on a Cerberus mission under Shepard," Kenneth grumbled into the hand that had propped up his head for the last thirty minutes. "Fancy another game of I Spy?"

Gabby shook her head. "Nah. It was fun for the first hour but..." she turned her head towards Jack's pit and lowered her voice. "I'm sick of Jack offering obscene suggestions. How do you spot a 'rimjob' in an Engine Room?"

"No worries Gab," he chirped. "I'm sure this Tali will bring enough entertaining outlets with her." He checked the time on his terminal, "where is she anyway? The Kodiak docked a while ago."

Gabby and Ken had had little time to adequately prepare for the arrival of the woman who'd be taking over the newly-created post of Chief Engineer. They were glad to have more help aboard the ship. Fighting the Collectors to a standstill on the ground was impressive but had the SR-2 itself become the main target of the conflict, the results would have been catastrophic. According to Shepard, Tali's work on the SSV's kinetic barriers had proven invaluable and she would gladly overlook the difficulties of collaborating with Cerberus if it meant returning to work on such a ship.

"By the way," continued Kenneth with a certain suggestiveness in his voice. "Did I mention I had dibs on the lovely lady?"

"Yeah right, she's suited and masked Kenny, not blind and deaf."

_Hypocrite, _Gabby thought. _If our new boss was a tall, scarred male turian you'd shit a brick and throw it at him. _But this was no time to start another fight, and she'd only be that bothered if his intentions were sincere.

"Team!" Shepard's strong voice rang through the speakers, returning them to full awareness. Shepard's voice had that effortless quality of instilling a determined focus into all it commanded; despite the fact that this time Kelly's unmistakable giggling in the background reduced the announcement's severity. "We've torn two Reaper allies new ones on consecutive days..." The Commander stopped for a few seconds to let the Normandy's residents make their varied noises of approval. "Which means we'll all be heading to Ilium for a celebratory shore leave before resuming recruitment!"

A soft, distinctive beep then told Gabby and Ken Shepard had reallocated the transmission to the Engine Room alone. "Tali's headed your way guys, and according to EDI she just fired up a Combat Drone in the CIC." Shepard's tone was hushed, he sounded rather flustered.

Gabby's eyebrows formed a pained expression, Kenneth gulped. Shepard noticed the nervous pause and continued.

"I don't know if it was accidental or not but still…well, just be careful. I trust both of you completely, but Cerberus and the Migrant Fleet have some very nasty history. Tali's coming from a lifetime in the Migrant Fleet being raised on stories about the prejudices against her people and the evils of artificial intelligence, which was _not _helped by Jacob just a few moments ago. So just ma- _not now Kelly! _Just make her feel comfortable, show her around and lay off the flirting for the first few weeks."

"He's talking about you, Gabby," Kenneth whispered. She flipped him off.

"Understood?" Shepard queried.

"Aye, aye sir," said Gabby.

Rather than the usual loud buzz of the speakers dying down, Gabby and Ken heard the soft drone emanate from the speaker for a few seconds longer. A muffled giggle followed…then a lustful male voice.

"Now where were we?" It was Shepard, and from his tone this was not an intentional part of the transmission.

"That's it baby," moaned Kelly, "punish me, I've been a _bad girl!" _she yelped pleasurably after a loud crack.

"You like that, don't you _slut_?"

Gabby and Ken closed their eyes in horror and Jack spat out her snack. A ship-wide power failure would be really welcome right now.

"KELLY!" Shepard roared, "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LET GO OF THE DAMN BUTTON!"

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 2, CIC**

Rolston yawned and shambled out of the elevator, glad to have caught a quick nap following the strenuous intensity of having to work through the Horizon and Haestrom missions with so little sleep. He eagerly awaited the next message from his family. Little Becky would probably be learning to walk soon. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind he found himself flat on his face, having tripped over some large object on the floor. It was Matthews. He was curled up in a foetal position, clutching his stomach and breathing raggedly. Rolston collected himself and knelt by his colleague's side.

"My _god _Matthews," he said. "Are you alright? What the hell happened?"

"Ice pack," Matthews gurgled. The colour was draining from his stunned face. "Get me...an ice pack _quick!" _


	7. Memories

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Gabby and Ken were reeling from two consecutive shocks; an insight into Kelly and Shepard's private life that every journalist in the galaxy would've killed for and the fact that they had only a few seconds to absorb it. The hiss of the elevator door outside and tentative footsteps which followed diverted their attention. These may have been the worst circumstances for surprise inspection they'd ever been in. Tali had already resorted to violence and Shepard was in no position to restrain her right now. The only one being restrained was Kelly.

Gabby sucked in a breath. "That's her!" She threw the Rubik's Cube to one side, which thankfully didn't fall on Jack's head again, and gripped Kenneth's arm so hard he squealed. _"Please _don't do anything stupid Ken!" As much as she (secretly) loved his wit there was no telling what effect it would have here.

He grunted in affirmation and pulled away, massaging the red nail marks left by her grasp. The door opening and entrance of their new boss cut off his retort.

They did the automatic routine of standing to attention and saluting.

"Propulsion Engineer Gabriella Daniels," said Gabby stiffly.

"Power Engineer Kenneth Donnelly," said Kenneth, sounding almost comical from such a rare attempt at formality.

The purple-suited and masked quarian gave a brusque nod, "Tali'Zorah Vas Neema."

The duo weren't entirely sure how far Tali's power over them extended. Shepard liked to keep an informal ship, feeling morale prospered best when restrictions were minimalized and only enforcing discipline when it hindered job performance. The new yet poorly-defined post of Chief Engineer no doubt made Tali the Ranking Officer of the Engineering Deck but neither of them knew just how this would play out. All quarians had to be well-versed in everything involving starships so they had no shortage of trust in her abilities, but where etiquette and military rankings were concerned they had no details on quarian/human collaboration.

Shepard always spoke highly of Tali whenever she came up in conversation, calling her a dear friend as well as an unrivalled machinist. Gabby and Ken weren't about to disregard how she must have been feeling. The impact of losing Shepard, finding out that he lived and was working with Cerberus, having an unfriendly encounter with someone like Miranda over Veetor then having to be plucked off a sun-roasted world to work on a Cerberus ship against a hated enemy would take its toll on anybody. Then there was Jacob's probably unintentional but nonetheless harmful remark about EDI. No detailed mission reports of the showdown on Haestrom had reached them yet but they weren't prepared to believe that several hours of exchanging gunfire with the geth had improved Tali's mood either. It would be best to play it safe and await her order.

Tali said nothing, examining the motionless duo still frozen in their formal pose. "Oh," she blurted after a nervous silence, "at ease."

They complied, relieved to have made some progress in this situation. Kenneth knew better than to try handling the pleasantries himself, and gave his friend a subtle nod.

"Welcome to the new Normandy ma'am. Engineer Donnelly and I will be assisting you in all matters of -"

"Let's get a few things straight first," said Tali with a boost of cold confidence. "I'm here for Shepard, nobody else. Cerberus has done inexcusable things and not just to my people."

"We know ma'am," said Gabby, voice calm and even. "But Ken and I are former Alliance techs, not terrorists."

Tali raised her head haughtily. Having no facial expressions to go by, the duo would have to rely on reading body language. Kenneth was hopeless at this sort of thing but Gabby understood: Tali considered their defection from the Alliance into Cerberus a dishonourable move.

"We were sick and tired of all the bureaucratic shite discrediting Shepard," said Kenneth. Memories of those bitter, frustrating days added a harsh edge to his tone. "We don't know about the decisions being made by Cerberus' top dogs, no pun intended," he added, prompting Gabby to facepalm. "And…if we did we probably wouldn't agree. But we're just engineers, nobody important."

Gabby cringed again and Tali folded her arms. Kenneth got the message for once.

"I mean… not that you and Gabby and what we do aren't important," he said. "But what I'm trying to say is-"

"What he's trying to say," said Gabby icily, "is that this is Shepard's ship and we're Shepard's team. The SR-2's full of people who aren't here to advance human interests." She thought of Mordin's tireless, selfless work and Grunt's struggle to find an identity as something more than the trophy of a dead warlord. She thought of her Commander and all his courageous, unrewarded actions. "Our mission is to stop the Collectors."

Kenneth cleared his thorat. "And let me say ma'am-"

"You…might not want to keep addressing me like that." Tali's voice softened as she said this. "My last stint in command was less than an hour ago and," she looked at the floor and chuckled humourlessly. "It…ended badly."

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Medical Bay**

"Mr Matthews _please _stay still so I can get a proper look at it!"

There was never a dull moment serving under Shepard for Dr. Chakwas. It was fascinating to finally get to examine the effects of a quarian-built combat drone suffered by someone on their own side. Or it would have been, if she could only get him to stop squirming.

"Oooooooh god my lungs feel like they're about to fall out," he whimpered.

"It was a small, defensive kinetic function, young man," said the doctor. "Equivalent to taking a punch in the stomach. If I can patch up a shotgun blast without any lungs falling out I can fix this."

They were in the Medbay with Goldstein, Hawthorne and Patel, who were red in the face from an extended, shared laughing fit. EDI temporarily took over their duties as they had 'escorted' their colleague to the bay but a sulking Joker needed to stay behind. Rolston had returned to the dorm.

"Hey Matthews come on, you offered your body," said Joker over the intercom. "Didn't exactly specify how. I'd count that as a victory, it's about as close as you're going to get to a quarian touching you."

"Did you even pick up the comm chatter during the last mission?" said Goldstein. "Apparently that drone of Tali's usually goes for the eyes."

"I'd have targeted the balls," Patel muttered, disgusted.

"You'd need another cyberwarfare division for such a small target," Hawthorne quipped.

"That is an incorrect observation, Crewman Hawthorne," said EDI. "The scanning and targeting systems of a Flotilla-built combat drone are sufficient for short range engagement with an average human male's genitals. Cerberus command would deem the requisitioning of a second cyberwarfare division a misallocation of resources that could…ah. That was a joke."

"Keep at it EDI, you're getting there," said Joker.

"Fighting on a ship," hissed Dr Chakwas, still wrestling with Matthews in an attempt to expose more of his bruised belly. "Would never happen in the Alliance."

"_Nothing _happened in the Alliance, doc," said Joker bitterly. "At least not after Sovereign. How else did you think we ended up here?"

"Nice bedside manner by the way," Matthews croaked, turning over to glare at Chakwas.

"You technically aren't on a bed, Mr Matthews. "This is a reclining chair I usually use for gynaecological examinations."

"Good thing Patel wasn't in control of that drone then," said Goldstein over the crew's joyous reaction to this latest information. "You'd have needed the chair even more."

"Alright!" said the doctor as she finally exposed sufficient skin. She turned off the intercom. Matthews would recover; it was a minor injury but the real concern was the young man's mental state. "Everybody here to mock, please leave!" The exit of their audience was reluctant but expected. Nobody wanted to get on Chakwas' bad side.

"Why'd you have to send them out?" Matthews murmured, filling with dread. "Is it that bad?"

"Mr Matthews, I thought I'd spare the embarrassment of telling you you're fine. There's some bruising but the skin isn't even broken. I'd withhold that information from your fellow crewmembers if I were you. This is a warship after all."

"How long before the pain goes away?" he grumbled.

"No more than a few days, so suck it up." she said. "As for your reputation," she added with a smirk. "Give it nine or ten years."

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck**

Gabby and Ken left the Engine Room worked to the bone and happier than they had been in a long time.

They had sorely underestimated her. Tali was a master of the engineering arts. They would not have been surprised to know she stood out even among her own mechanically-oriented people. Her quiet, understated manner likely fooled many into believing her to be shy and withdrawn, but now they knew it to be but a mask over the constant inquisitive workings of a brilliant mind. She brought out the best of their knowledge and intuition, pushing them to the limit several times all the while showing a willingness to listen and consider their own ideas. Today no chatter outside of the cold, hard duties of their work rose, but with professional respect established it would not take long for Tali to warm to them both.

They examined their omni-tools. Almost five hours had passed them by, ending the working shift for the day. It had been tense and at times almost unpleasant to work with someone so wary, but Gabby and Ken left their stations that evening silently elated to have met someone so capable.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Mess Hall**

The engineering duo sat down to a well-earned meal. Only Goldstein was at the table this time. Rolston discussed plans for moving his New Canton-based family with Patel in the dormitory, Hadley and Hawthorne returned to both comfort and torment a shell-shocked Matthews in the Medbay and various other off duty crew were scattered around discussing why Shepard and Kelly had declined attending dinner tonight. Kenneth grinned at Gabby when they caught the gist of what was being said. It was fun to have the upper hand in scuttlebutt for once, but they weren't going to use it. Shepard had tried his best to divert the flow of gossip from their argument earlier and they weren't going to forget that any time soon.

Tali would probably be down there for hours longer, energised by her eagerness. With a stab of sympathy Gabby realised that grabbing onto a new mission with so little hesitation and working with such diligence was probably a coping mechanism for the quarian. Tali mentioned losing many marines under her leadership, maybe she felt succeeding in SR-2 management would make up for that. They would talk when she was ready.

"So how's Tali?" said Goldstein. "She treat you okay on your first shift together?"

"She's fine," Kenneth said simply. "Beats working under old Napoleon by a bloody country mile." He shuddered at the memory.

Goldstein's eyes narrowed with confusion. "Napoleon?"

"He means Marlowe," said Gabby.

"Marlowe? _Captain _Marlowe of the Perugia?" said Goldstein. "He was pretty big back in the day. I think Bert met him once. What was he like?"

Gabby pulled a disgusted face as she cut the first piece off a small steak. "The stick up that guy's ass had a stick up its ass," she said.

"Which also had a small family of sticks up its arse," Kenneth added with a semi-serious nod.

Kasumi crept from her room having just completed a very secret Haiku lesson with Grunt. Somebody had said the words 'Marlowe' and 'Perugia.' The only time Gabby and Ken talked about their Alliance days with anyone but Shepard was when Marlowe's name came up. She cloaked and tiptoed to the dinner table. Kelly had been acting really flustered for the past few hours for some reason but nonetheless was ahead in their wager. Losing all the tracking devices was a setback for Kasumi, and a quick, sneaky look at Kelly's private terminal earlier had revealed a troubling development. The yeoman planned to rig booking arrangements for their Ilium hotel, 'accidentally' placing Gabby and Ken in the same room. There was something special about that picture of the duo in their goofy 'I surived the Battle of the Citadel' shirts that somehow made Kasumi feel that if she kept digging into their Alliance history she'd find what she needed to win.

"Tell me more about this guy Marlowe," Goldstein said.

Kenneth set down his fork. "Short-tempered Alliance Captain with the mouth of a down-on-his-luck drill sergeant, _real _piece of shit."

"He was best suited to command people being trained to kill without mercy," said Gabby. "Neverknew how to handle the engineering staff. Even the janitor got the boot camp treatment on The Perugia."

"Any reason why?" Goldstein asked. "Or was he just a jerk?"

Kenneth tried to answer through a mouthful of samosa but was cut off when Gabby took the dish from him and replaced it with a bowl of pea soup. She berated him for returning to solid foods like this. Dr Chakwas had said his stomach wasn't ready yet and Gabby told him she wasn't going to stand by and watch him get sick again. After some protest he complied, muttering under his breath. Goldstein watched the scene with a knowing look on her face.

Kasumi supressed a giggle. _Those two, _she thought. _I wonder if I'll bring up that little exchange at their wedding. _

Eventually the conversation got back on track.

"Anyway," said Gabby. "Marlowe used to command the Waterloo believe it or not. It's one of the reasons why he got the nickname Napoleon."

Goldstein's eyes widened and she looked to Kenneth for confirmation. He nodded. "When we were assigned to the Perugia it turned out to be his first time fronting a ship since he was removed from the Waterloo in 2178. Old bastard had spent five years in limbo."

"Why?" said Goldstein, sipping her coffee.

Gabby slapped Kenneth's hand as he reached for a discarded cake. "You know what happened at Torfan right?" she asked. "All those people got killed, Randall Kyle went crazy then that batarian propaganda writer mysteriously dissapeared," she turned to Kenneth. "What was her name? Fyarr?"

"Dryarr," grumbled Kenneth, rubbing his hand and looking longingly at the cake.

Gabby turned back to Goldstein. "Anyway, the Waterloo was at the front of the Torfan raid, so after the scandal, the top brass removed Marlowe from that post but...as much as I hate to admit it, Marlowe had been a great serviceman in his prime. They let him keep his job and rank, but withheld any on-ship postings. He spent his days touring training campuses giving speeches."

Goldstein hissed. "That must've hurt."

"Just imagine it," said Kenneth with grim satisfaction. "Going from commanding what was then the most famous and celebrated ship in the Alliance Fleet, named after Earth's most well-known battle to inspecting tech academies, chatting with normies like me and Gabby all the while stillwearing your Captain's Bars."

"Rumour has it Marlowe was close to an Admiral's Star by the time of the Siege of Torfan," Gabby said. "After the battle he lost the Waterloo anda promotion. He was bitter...as..._hell_ when we first met him. The guy just went around campus bullying people." She shook her head and stared with a furrowed brow into what was left of her meal, as if seeing his pale face again.

"You mentioned the first reason why you called him Napoleon, the Waterloo part," said Goldstein with an interested smirk. "What was the second reason?"

Gabby and Ken's eyes met and they chuckled. "Classic Napoleon complex," Gabby chirped.

"Aye," said Kenneth. "Guy was a wee little man with a massive power fixation. Pushed around regularly-sized folk cause he could."

"It was never, everokay to mention any of those things in front of him," Gabby added. "You never talked about his lost ship, or the scandal, or the nickname to his face. He'd go berserk."

"What happened when he met you two?" Goldstein said, now immersed in this story.

Gabby shrugged. "His first visit wasn't that eventful. He'd bump into you, shout you down then go off, probably looking for some children to frighten. His secondvisit however..."

Kenneth flushed and excused himself from the table. Gabby looked apprehensively after him.

"C'mon," urged Goldstein. "You can tell _me. _Hand on my heart no Glorified Fratboy or winded preschooler will hear of this."

Gabby had no idea what her colleague meant by winded pre-schooler. It probably had something to do with Matthews and Tali. She was also wary of Goldstein's involvement with the torrents of teasing over Kenneth.

"It was about four years ago," she said.

Kasumi hit 'record' on her omni-tool...

* * *

**Alliance Academy of Engineering Technology, Combat Simulation Chamber, 2181**

A total disaster and it was _all _Stephanie's fault. Gabby's partner for this combat simulation had insisted several times that she'd run the numbers correctly and all would work out. It was typical of her. Gabby had been so shocked by watching the sudden breakdown of a seemingly fine Drive Core simulator that she'd barely registered Stephanie's insincere apology and hurried excusal of herself to the bathroom. She wiped the sweat from her brow and analysed the wreckage miserably. There would be no fixing it without drawing the attention of that old reptile Marlowe. This just _had _to happen with two days left before his visit ended.

It was a hot Saturday morning on the Edmonton Campus. Potential recruits who weren't sleeping away the time in their dorms sauntered around in groups, chatting animatedly and sipping ice tea while enjoying the sights and scents of the lakeside scenery which bloomed rich and full in the summer days. Others occupied seats in dark, solitary corners of the coffee houses or libraries, immersed in their work. Gabby would like to have been treating herself to a blissful morning alone, sitting on her bed with a cool breeze seeping through the open window, reading a copy of _From the Albatross to the Waterloo – Military Craft through time _and planning her strategy for the upcoming Drake Era multiplayer showdown with Kenneth (Darkborn vs. Knights Errant) later on. Instead she had got up at the crack of dawn to waste almost four hours assisting a complete idiot.

Despite its availability to all recruits on Saturday mornings, the Simulator was seldom used. Few trusted themselves with its intricate technology. Even Gabby and Ken, the star pupils of every lecturer were hesitant. Gabby had no idea what had possessed her to assist Stephanie Sorenson, campus' token bimbo with no supervisors or safety officers around.

The minutes ticked by and Stephanie didn't return. Gabby picked up and stacked over three dozen pieces of the prototype. She was alone and furious at being abandoned like this. She also regretted not being at least dressed for the task. Jeans and a Grateful Dead t-shirt weren't compatible with Alliance engines, imitation or not. Was Stephanie even coming back? Or had the girl pleasured a few boys on the way to the bathroom before arriving and forgetting why she'd set out in the first place? Gabby could imagine the stupid blonde's begging posture and pleading puppy eyes that had bent so many gullible male recruits to her will.

_Please please __please__ Gabby you gotta take the blame for this. Daddy'll never forgive me if I get kicked outta Tech Academy and y'know I'm like, totally close to it. _

She grimaced. Stephanie had been screwing up and taking warnings from day one but breaking equipment of this cost would very likely spell her end. She almost felt sympathetic.

"DANIELS, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?"

Gabby's head slumped forward. There was no mistaking that thick Tennessee accent: it was Marlowe. She turned and saw him doing that hurried half-walk, half-run men do that doesn't actually make them go any faster. He was looking ridiculous in a sweaty tracksuit that hung loose off his short, scrawny body. His skin looked even more pockmarked than usual and she swore his black hair had receded considerably since his first visit. But almost everyone in the Alliance knew that Captain Marlowe's unimpressive size was no reason to take him lightly. A spectacular fall from grace could turn the best of men into cold, heartless husks and Marlowe had endured the military scandal of the decade at Torfan, coming through cleared of criminal charges but removed from command of the prestigious Waterloo.

Marlowe stopped at her side, huffing from the rigours of yet another morning run that would add no muscle to his frame. He stared at the smouldering ruin with a sagging mouth. She couldn't tell how much of the crimson now rising in his face was the result of exercise and how much was just another manifestation of his famous rage. She spotted a surprised Stephanie by the doorway in the corner of her eye. One look at Marlowe's sweaty back was all the blonde needed, and she took off before Gabby could even make a desperate, wordless motion. Marlowe turned to meet her eyes. She blinked nervously; his face was a beet-red mask of utter fury.

"Sir," her voice was shaking as it always did under his hating eyes. But her reason, which proved her innocent, was smothered by nerves. Stephanie had done all the programming and diagnostics. Stephanie had typed in every incorrect coordinate and computed every miscalculation. All Gabby had done was hit the 'on' button when the idiot finished fumbling. But Marlowe wasn't going to give Gabby's voice any time to resurface.

"Daniels!" he bellowed. "You are addressing a captain! You will conduct yourself properly!"

Spittle shot from his mouth and dotted her face. She flinched but obeyed, saluting with hand to one side and legs together. His eyes then locked onto her unfortunate choice of shirt.

"_Grateful dead?"_ He looked her in the face again. "You'll be grateful to be fucking dead when I'm finished with you! Get lost on your way to a pot party and thought you'd screw with eighty thousand credits of machinery?"

Gabby looked at the grey, stained tracksuit and bit her lower lip, holding back her response questioning him if he'd got lost on his way to a _Rocky _convention for fiftysomething has-beens.

"Sir!" Gabby felt outraged at this injustice. "I was just helping Stephanie, Sir!"

"Sorenson?" he spat. "I catch you wrecking the Simulator and you push the blame on her? I smell bullshit Daniels, and I'm not talking about your perfume choice! Perhaps you'd like to explain this to the whole academy, it's their assessment you've ruined."

Before she could protest, Marlowe fired up his omni-tool and gained access to every on-site student pager.

_Speak up dammit! Tell him! _But the words wouldn't come. Her anger at Stephanie for this backstabbing, anger with herself for agreeing to support the girl and unleavened hatred of this cruel man overwhelmed her.

One-by-one the students marched in, most staring resentfully at her for being the cause of their leisure time's interruption. Kenneth was near the back. He furrowed his brow at the broken machine then gave her a questioning look. She mouthed '_it wasn't my fault'_ before returning to her stiff, attentive posture. Before long they all filed in, half lining the balconies overlooking the scene and half forming a crowd surrounding her and Marlowe. She felt like a child again; at the mercy of the school bully in front a horde of spectators who would do nothing to help her.

"Alliance pissant wannabes!" Marlowe shouted to the assembled crowd, "I knew working with eezo made you ugly but my god it cannot have made you this stupid. It seems Miss Full-of-Herself decided she'd screw with your free time _and _examinations by destroying the Simulator!" He turned back to her, beads of sweat flying from his thin hair onto her face. "Do you deny this?"

Gabby's face burned even harder as the tutting, head shaking and tasteless laughs began to rise from the crowd. She still couldn't find her voice. Kenneth however was staring at Marlowe, looking angrier than she had even seen him.

"Cat got your tongue Daniels?" He gave her a sadistic smile, trying to elicit a response. "I thought you were trying to pin this on someone else, right? Sorenson was it? We'll see about that! Willis!" he pointed to the nearest recruit. "Get me the sign-in register!" The selected recruit ran as fast as he could.

Gabby's heart sank even lower. Stephanie had never remembered to sign in before. Willis returned before long and handed Marlowe the datapad.

"I see a _**Gabriella Daniels **_but no _**Stephanie Sorenson**_ on here!" She knew it was too much to hope Stephanie would remember today. Marlowe was not done taunting. "What is your major malfunction Miss Daniels? Too many brain cells devoted to showing off and throwing your fellow students under the bus when you can't get the spotlight, and not enough devoted to learning how sign your fucking name?!"

Tears filled Gabby's eyes and she stared at the floor. There was a sudden commotion from near the back of the crowd. She caught a glimpse of an irate Kenneth being restrained by four people. Fortunately Marlowe was too busy yelling at her to notice.

_No Kenneth, _she thought._ Don't take the bait. Don't throw it all away for me!_

Marlowe's eyes swept over the crowd. "Now I don't give a fuck about how things go here in maple syrup land but in the Alliance, we believe in the value of group cooperation. Engineers are paired for _life. _We depend on you, much as it hurts me to admit it. We depend on you. There are moments in battle where the grease monkeys in the shithole of the ship are all we have to keep us breathing. One bad engineer," he pointed at her, "one big liability. I think this calls for some teamwork! You will all report to the Main Auditorium in _full _uniform tomorrow morning at 4am to undergo a five hour master class on the procedures and benefits of correct military discipline! I don't care if I interrupt your morning religious services, I don't care if I interrupt your morning tug-along to the Fornax Channel, you will be there!"

The few protests that popped up in the crowd only incensed him further. He repeated the message, increasing the speed and volume of his delivery with each word.

"Bullshit!" he shouted, "I didn't hear a 'sir, yes sir' now let's try again! You will _all _assemble in the Main Auditorium in _full _uniform tomorrow morning at 4am to undergo a five hour master class on military discipline _without _the bitchy attitude! I am not to blame, _she _is!"

"SIR, YES SIR," chanted the crowd. Marlowe took one last disdainful look at her before dismissing the others.

"Daniels, you'll stay here and clear all this up. And I'd _better _not spot that Highlander sidekick of yours trying to help."

* * *

**Alliance Academy of Engineering Technology, Main Auditorium, 2181 – The next day**

Gabby spent the remainder of Saturday alone and nobody made any effort to change that, not even Kenneth. He sent a quick message to her omni-tool not long after the humiliation in the Simulator (**- Don't worry Gab, I'll make things right. Trust me -**) before disappearing without a trace. Maybe Marlowe had intercepted the message and nailed him on trumped-up charges too. Or maybe her worst fears had been realised and Kenneth was on a ship back to Glasgow, expelled for engaging Napoleon in a fistfight.

Like schoolchildren, her colleagues hadn't even bothered to lower their voices when sensationalising the day's events or slandering her personally. Hours of secluded timewasting was followed by an immediate departure to bed with no follow-up word from Kenneth. Stephanie had once more decided to save her own, spray-tanned skin rather than help someone in need. She sat, bold as brass with her stupid friends several rows behind Gabby, not even changing her facial expression when spotting the woman she'd betrayed. Gabby's few hours in bed had been predictably sleepless and worried. She could be dishonourably discharged for the Simulator debacle, as no evidence linking Stephanie to its breakdown had surfaced. Then there was the elusive Kenneth...

It was a grim scene. The auditorium was usually only used for grand ceremony and this was anything but. The folded flags and minimal lighting gave it a look as tired as the people gathered inside it. Several dozen rows of plastic chairs were out; a far cry from the prestige of the oak benches used in the induction and the security staff lined the walls. Everyone who arrived settled in with quickness and efficiency as Marlowe was not renowned for his patience. He beheld them from the podium, the only person in the room who looked rested, fresh and ready to begin the day. His black hair was slicked and his blue captain's uniform was ironed, quite unlike everybody else's. The look of smug superiority made him complete. As the last body settled, he pulled out a datapad and began droning a speech.

Gabby felt a nudge at her back, followed by a whispered _"Gab!"_

It was Kenneth.

She turned to look at him. Like the others, Kenneth was in uniform but appeared rugged and unshaven. His shirt was rumpled, trousers stained with grass and boots muddy. He also had a distinctive smell of the outdoors on him. He had clearly been out all night, but the look in his brown eyes was energetic. Gabby turned back to the front. Marlowe was too engrossed in the datapad's text to look at her.

"Kenneth," she whispered over the drab speech coming from the front. "Why have you been out all night? What have you done?" She knew this had something to do with getting back at Napoelon and loved the loyalty of her friend for it. But she couldn't stand the idea of Ken jeopardising his future over this. If he had been caught...

"I told you I'd make things right Gab," he whispered back. "Just wait. You'll see."

"...a very informative educational vid!" Marlowe said proudly, leaving the stage and switching on the huge screen that made up the entire back wall. "Play it!" he demanded with a jerk of his head towards the top box.

No vid played, and the chamber was left in an uncomfortable silence staring at a black screen. Then after a long moment, the speakers fired up and at an almost deafening volume came the music. Kenneth had done her proud.

_Waterloo – I was defeated you won the war  
Waterloo – promise to love you forever more_

Eruption. The seated crowd of tired pupils collapsed into a mass of uncontrollable laughter and Marlowe turned his brightest red yet, running up and down the rows screaming obscene threats that nobody heard over the overpowering sound of the music. Even the security staff lined up by the walls cracked smiles. Gabby lost all sense of worry and joined the others.

_Waterloo – couldn't escape if I wanted to  
Waterloo – knowing my fate is to be with you_

Marlowe set his omni-tool's microphone to maximum volume.

"ENOUGH!" he howled as the technicians in the auditorium's top box finally subdued the music, leaving only the din of several hundred shouts of laughter. "I WILL NOT BE DISRESPECTED LIKE THIS!"

Silence fell, but a sea of faces contorted by repressed merriment remained.

"WHO THE_ FUCK_ DID THIS?" Marlowe was shaking head to foot, still marching up and down the rows. "WHO JUST ENDED THEIR ACADEMY STAY AND SIGNED THEIR FUCKING DEATH WARRANT?"

Silence remained. Marlowe's demented glare wasn't going to give him the upper hand today. He met the eyes of everyone in the room, lingering for a few seconds on her and Kenneth. Gabby batted her eyelashes at him, mocking with her innocence. She had nothing to do with this and Marlowe knew it. She knew her best friend well; there would be no adequate evidence to link either of them to this. Marlowe was ruthless, but dealing with the best engineer he had ever met in Kenneth Donnelly. The old man's voice had also taken on a hoarse quality and everyone knew he wouldn't be able to keep up the screaming for much longer.

"I've had _enough!" _he spat again before turning back to the top box where the two giggling technicians sat. "Play the backup vid." They obeyed, but once again nothing came up on the screen. Horror creased Marlowe's already ugly features. "NO WAIT!" he yelled, "DON'T PLAY THE BACKUP VID! DON'T PLAY-"

His order came too late. The speakers had already started up.

_As long as I gaze on Waterloo sunset  
I am in paradise_

Marlowe gave one last shriek before storming out in defeat. Every thrilled student left behind knew that there would be hell to pay for this. The disgraced captain would likely be back in only a few minutes accompanied by the full fury of a grouchy General Staff, but until that time came he was just another joke. They all happily sang along in-between further laughs, swaying side-to-side in time with the music, and security was too amused to stop them. Gabby swore she saw one murmur a few words before noticing her and ceasing.

She spotted Kenneth, now further away due to all the commotion. He sang along while receiving several congratulatory pats on the back for producing this masterpiece. He gave her a smirk and nod, and without stopping to think about it, she blew him a kiss in return. They blushed and broke eye contact.

Gabby had known from her first week on campus that Tech Academy would be easier to endure with Kenneth at her side. But what would happen now that she was falling for him?


	8. Aliens

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Kasumi's Room**

Haiku was powerful and memorable. It reminded Grunt of himself, and of his people at the zenith of their glory. When the whispered name of a Battlemaster brought chills to the fighting fit of entire colonies. Back in the days when they were simultaneously feared, respected, envied, emulated and hated. Before their categorisation as trophies, consolation prizes and hired goons for lesser species unworthy of even wiping blood from their boots. Haiku struck its listeners and tested its learners. Time had tested it, and the art still prospered amongst scholars. Grunt could not pass up the chance to count himself among them. He would make this skill his own.

The heavily-armoured krogan leaned forward in his seat, studying the datapad Kasumi had left for him. His eyes flickered over the neatly-arranged words again and again and again. He was bred for this; to learn, adapt, and conquer new things for the good of Tuchanka's surviving clans. The minutes passed by and he became engrossed in its words.

_Hmmm…The human Goto is flimsy and slippery but possesses a sharp mind. Massani mentioned the need to properly express oneself to ensure maximum intimidation. Warlady Shiagur of Canrum struck terror into the hearts of her enemies with her eloquent powers of speech, before making their fears reality. This literary skill will prove vital._

Grunt's examination of the verses became so diligent he forgot the need to close the door that Kasumi had left open. He mentally recited the layman's definition given to him by the Japanese thief.

_Traditionally arranged into syllabic groupings of five and seven, Goto said. _He tried to count and keep track of each syllable on his fingers, but with only three on each hand it proved an irritant. Failure at such a menial task did not suit Grunt, and he counted again, only to once more lose track. He let out a low growl after failing for the third time.

"Ahhh! Cursed humans with their extra fingers and base-ten math!"

What was the alternative Goto had suggested? Oh yes: _'If you struggle, say it out loud and drum out a beat.' _He growled again when remembering her tone. Goto had said those words in that overtly playful, patronising voice she used in many situations that didn't call for it. But now this appeared to be his only option. Grunt cleared his throat and recited the verse, accenting each syllable with alternating blows to his armoured thighs.

"Breath-less, glin-ting skin

Mus-cles work-ing in rhy-thm

Cloaked des-ire watch-es

Look-ing at me now

His indi-ffe-rent eyes smile..."

He stopped for a moment, feeling mortified. The imprints of Okeer, when they weren't relaying images of endless battlefields and the glorious dead, warned him to expect the unexpected. No warning or billion-credit genetic engineering could have convinced him he would one day be sat here, surrounded by trinkets of human sentimentality reciting the words of a smitten human woman for the good of the krogan.

_Focus! _

He shook off the embarrassment and redirected his attention to the datapad. Emotion was a hindrance when it wasn't aiding the Blood Rage. It was weakness; self-consciousness had no place in the heart of a pure krogan, especially one who was reciting poetry alone.

"I am a pud-dle

Beau-ti-ful and good

Pun-ish-ing with his kind-ness

Ja-cob is per-fect."

The krogan straightened his posture once again, which proved difficult on such a small sofa. Despite the physical discomfort, coupled with the squishy human lyrical content, he was pleased with this 'Haiku' discovery. One day all krogan would be in awe of the spoken and written words that complemented his unmatched prowess on the battlefield. He would be sought after by every worthy foe and quoted by every loyal progeny. Warlord Grunt: ruin of the Collectors and the Reapers, voice of the krogan.

The harsh sound of glass shattering ended the daydream and Grunt jerked his large, plated head upwards to the doorway.

Jacob Taylor was there, looking terrified yet at the same time, flattered. A broken water glass lay at his feet, its contents steadily pooling into the room.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT?" bellowed Grunt.

Jacob flinched at the outburst and tried to piece together a response. The Cerberus agent's nerves failed him. He wisely decided against answering the question and ran back to the elevator, en route to locking himself in the Armoury with his trusty Eviscerator for perhaps a month or two.

Grunt felt a rush of blood fill his face, though it definitely wasn't the Rage. It wasn't like anything he had ever felt. Had he spent so much time around these temperamental bags of scale-less flesh that he was starting to blush like them? But the fury and embarrassment flared for only a moment, as his unusually large omni-tool changed the subject for him by letting off its customised AK-47 ringtone. It was Zaeed again.

"Kid!" barked the irritable human. "You gonna learn Jenga today or what?"

"Later," said the krogan with finality. As much as he looked forward to adding 'balance' to an already impressive battlefield repertoire, his brain first needed to process this literary skill. Zaeed didn't relent.

"The hell have you been anyway?" he demanded.

Grunt frowned. "Studying," he said after a rather costly moment of hesitation.

Unfortunately for Grunt, Zaeed had gained first-hand experience of almost every krogan emotional state. Their supposed permanent fluctuation between uncaring stoicism and anger was a myth to seasoned krogan colleagues and killers. Even the most hardened warlord revealed more than he intended when staring into the barrel of a gun or feeling a stiff, unyielding blade steadily pry off his head plate. Zaeed Massani was a veteran of both collaboration and killing when it came to the natives of Tuchanka. He saw through the lie.

"Studying?" yelled Zaeed. "My greying arse! Have you been going over that fruitcup poetry again?"

"No."

"Cause I told you, that stuff's for peace nicks and cannon fodder!" Grunt heard Zaeed rap his knuckles on what he presumed to be Jessie's rusted stock. "Mightier than the datapen!" he boomed. "Now get down here!"

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Tali knew she was overworked, but couldn't bring herself to leave the terminal. Engineers Donnelly and Daniels had been dismissed for dinner an hour ago, and their absence left too heavy a workload for just one machinist. She could feel the AI watching. That cold, emotionless stare was surely observing every inch of every room, but Tali's instincts kept conjuring up the image of an overarching beast staring over her shoulder. She would just have to continue telling herself that eventually she'd get used to all this; that it was just another of life's tests, the kind all quarians must face and conquer as the Blessed Ancestors did before them. But jumping to a Cerberus ship when the Haestrom research team was barely cold...she took her hands off the Terminal and sighed.

_A Cerberus ship. Oh...Reegar, Father, Veetor, Mother, Auntie Raan. Never thought you'd see me working here did you?_

The two years running between Shepard's death and her current predicament – although marred by almost unbearable heartbreak – had been years of growth. Gone was the tentative, pre-Pilgrimage child too often prepared to look for the best in people; this Tali knew how ugly the world could be, she knew so much more about her friends, foes and self.

It had coloured her view on earlier life. She had learned that from the moment she was out of the bubble that agenda-driven people had been trying to win her favour. Blessed with her father's mechanical mind and mother's shapely figure, Tali had been the object of desire for many men of the Migrant Fleet. At first it was difficult to tell genuine attraction and friendship from veiled manipulation, but she learned in time. The view of her as a pawn in a political chess game had intensified after Pilgrimage. All the insincere gestures of sympathy over her loss – empty words coming from the same people discrediting Shepard _and _the Reaper threat – had showed her once and for all the kind of people making up the remnant of the quarian race. There were people like Prazza: hotheads with no patience who listened only to their emotions, never considering the good of the Fleet. There were people like Admiral Zaal'Koris, who had far too optimistic a view of the world to give realism a shot. There were people like Mother and poor Kal'Reegar: too wrapped up in duty to realise their own worth. There were people like Father and his friends: too political and internally-focused, especially with the Reapers on the horizon. Then there were pigs like that Cerberus technician earlier, who she had _no _time for.

She was Rael's daughter through and through; a bright young woman with a bright future. Someone of her standing in the Fleet would be the ultimate object of exploitation for Cerberus.

But despite all this, Tali picked up no such vibe from her new staff. They were a funny pair, Daniels and Donnelly, nothing she had come to expect from the kind of people who normally made up terrorist organisations. She looked at the terminal's clock.

_Keelah! Has it been that long?_

It was time for bed. Human/quarian psychological analysis and fuel cell readjustment would have to wait. Until life slowed down and took on a more routine quality she'd do what worked best when doubt descended: trust Shepard's wisdom, stick by his side, and keep Chiktikka on standby. She signed out and left the Engine Room. Maybe talking to some of the non-Cerberus crew would clear her head. The Commander's rag-tag team for the SSV had impressed, could the SR-2's squad live up to their legend?

A scream of fury burst from the room to her right and Tali grabbed the small of her back, going for a shotgun that was no longer there. According to the ship's accommodation info the room belonged to Zaeed Massani. But the scream had been inhuman.

"I _KNOW _WHO DID IT, HUMAN!" thundered the voice. _That _must be the pureblood krogan known only as 'Grunt,' who had taken residence in the Port Cargo Area. Whose idea had it been to keep those rooms so close together, and directly above the Engineering Quarters?

She took a deep breath and opened the door, nerves braced and Chiktikka only a flicked switch away.

The krogan – the largest yet youngest Tali had ever seen – was standing less than an inch away from the grizzled human male. Massani looked to be outweighed by several hundred pounds of engineered muscle but was standing his ground, meeting his foe's eyes and red in the face from yelling.

"I keep telling you!" he spat, "you don't know _shit!" _

"I _KNOW!" _roared Grunt, jabbing a huge finger into the blemished breastplate of the man opposite him. They were so engrossed in this confrontation that Tali's opening of the door had gone unnoticed.

Tali froze. Unstable krogan aboard overcrowded starships occupied the most frightening cautionary tales told by Migrant Fleet parents. If things turned any more volatile Shepard would have no choice but to order the lower decks jettisoned. Would he do that with her down here?

The enormous krogan raised a beefy arm and Tali winced, thinking he was about to ignite the infamous Blood Rage. Maybe he'd seen her in the corner of his eye. But the irate pureblood just pointed to a table on his left. Tali craned her neck slightly, and caught a glimpse of what appeared to be a very old human board game. The krogan took another deep breath.

"IT WAS COLONEL MUSTARD, _IN_ THE DRAWING ROOM, _WITH _THE LEAD PIPE!" he roared, showering Massani with thick droplets of spittle. The human still didn't back down.

Tali clutched her chest and shook her head, almost delirious with relief. A lifetime of potential risks from something as basic as a cough had taught her to never push her luck, so she crept away before it ran out. It appeared this shouting match was far from over, but at least it wasn't going to result in the death of everyone below the ship's third deck.

Shepard was a magnet for the galaxy's best, brightest and craziest. This was the Normandy alright.

And here was nowhere else she would rather be.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Mess Hall**

Kenneth's twenty-fourth faked piss break of the week came to an end and he crept nonchalantly back into the Mess Hall. Gabby seemed to have finished telling Goldstein that very personal story, as the two women were clearing up. Maybe he should've waited a little longer, as upon spotting him Goldstein beamed and hurried over.

"You _angel!" _she whispered with deep admiration. "Doing that for Gabby!"

Kenneth rubbed the back of his neck and felt the heat flare up on his cheeks. "Well you know...I'd..." His eyes flickered over the room with as much nonchalance as possible. They were still only accompanied by Gabby and Gardener, but on this ship you could never tell when someone unwelcome was about to pop up. "Sort of thing I'd do for any of you." It was a pretty feeble attempt at appearing humble – and concealing his feelings – that Goldstein saw right through.

_"Sure _you would Kenneth." She was wearing that damned knowing smile that all the women on the ship (bar Miranda) seemed to have picked up all of a sudden whenever they spoke to him about Gabby. Goldstein patronisingly tapped his shoulder and went back to helping Gabby and Gardener clean up.

"Hey, Groundskeeper Kenny!" It was either Hawthorne or Hadley that yelled this newest nickname, he couldn't tell. In fact it was rather surprising to think that the two had taken this long to come up with it. They hurried out of the elevator and stopped in front of him with eager eyes. Kenneth couldn't stand it when they did that: it always gave the feeling of being cross-examined. Hawthorne's eye was reddening. He'd been struck.

"What happened to you?" said Kenneth, pointing to the swelling mound on the left side of his colleague's face.

"Oh this?" he said, rubbing the welt. "I asked Matthews if Tali taking his breath away was everything he hoped it would be.

The three men shared a rare, collective laugh.

"Speaking of which," said Hadley, "just what are Tali's sleeping arrangements anyway? I thought the I Guy only had two rooms installed down there."

Kenneth gulped, he hadn't considered this. The presence of a third engineer on Deck 4 hadn't been anticipated by Cerberus at all, and Tali's role as Chief Engineer meant one of the duo would have to move so the boss could remain where she was needed. Would _he_ be expected to act the chivalrous gentleman, offering Tali his room and moving into one of the dormitories on this deck? He could just imagine it; being kept up for hours and hours by Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews' on-going debate over the things they'd do to Miranda given the chance. The thought almost made him shudder. No more games of Twenty Questions through the dividing wall at 2am? No more guessing games on the origins of Zaeed's scars? No more moments where after a long and stressful day he could just relax and privately treasure every second of hearing her beautiful, unique voice?

Hadley picked up on his thoughtful expression.

"Lighten up Ken! If Tali takes your room, you could just move in with Gabby and add 'with benefits' to your situation!"

"Tali will be sleeping in the spare room next to mine," said a double-toned voice from behind Kenneth, before the Scot could make Hadley's eye match Hawthorne's. "Shepard left a note with me when she came aboard."

It was Garrus. When Kenneth turned to look him in the face, everyone stopped and stared. The news of Kenneth's Battery Room outburst of territorial feelings over Gabby had spread through the ship like an STD in Afterlife's VIP lounge, but nobody except Gabby and Shepard had even seen the two men in the same room while it had unfolded. This was their first meeting in front of the other crew since the incident. Kenneth felt every eye in the room on the two of them. Gardener was so fixated he failed to notice the dirt and dishwater dripping down his front from the plate he was holding. Gabby was terrified.

"That's...good news," said Kenneth curtly. His apology had buried the hatchet, but tension always outlived grudges and the SR-2's onlookers weren't letting it die just yet. Their eyes flickered from Garrus to Kenneth like prison inmates watching the two toughest criminals squaring off in a penitentiary courtyard.

Behind Garrus' back, Hawthorne and Hadley started shadow boxing, mouthing the word _'fight!' _over and over again.

"Yes I..." Garrus summoned that ridiculous, overdone politeness again. "I thought it would be more uh...appropriate considering...Tali's history working with me and...you know. I wouldn't want to come between you and Miss Daniels when the problem could be solved by moving Tali in next to me."

Gardener cringed in the corner of Kenneth's eye, Gabby and Goldstein covered smiling mouths and the Glorified Fratboys continued their exhibition behind the turian's back, this time mouthing _'foursome! Foursome! Foursome!' _and making the appropriate hand gestures and pelvic thrusts.

Kenneth nodded. "Thanks," he said without forcing a smile.

"Well," said Garrus after another pregnant pause. "If that's all? I'll-"

"Yeah," replied Kenneth. "Nothing more to say here."

"Then I'll head back to my station, those calibrations aren't going to do themselves."

He turned and marched back up the long, pod-flanked isle. Gabby breathed a sigh of relief and the Fratboys collapsed into hysterical giggles.

"Oh wait, one more thing!" Garrus called, walking back into the Mess Hall.

The tension returned in a split second. You could've heard a pin drop.

But Garrus didn't appear confrontational, and met every face in the room. "Has anyone seen my omni-tool?"

Shaking heads and a series of murmured _"nos"_ sent him back to the Battery Room.

More awkward silence followed, until Hawthorne's face lit up and he snapped his fingers.

"Viktor Krum!" he exclaimed. Several staring faces switched from Kenneth to him, even Hadley looked rather confused. _"That's _who Garrus reminds me of!"

"What do you mean?" said Hadley.

"Y'know," said Hawthorne, ponting at Kenneth. "Goofy redhead falls in love with smarter brunette girl, then along comes a tall foreign guy who-"

He ducked a viciously-thrown datapad.


	9. Poker

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Gabby wasn't surprised when she found out Kenneth had used the same method as she to impress Tali. She strolled into Engine Room three hours early, only to find him starting off the day at his own workstation. He gave her a sleepy smile and held out a steaming cup of coffee.

"Thanks," she said, accepting the beverage and taking to her post. She decided to copy him and open her work with a routine analysis of the Engineering Decks surrounding rooms. Malfunctions on a top-tier ship like this were infrequent, but few top-tier ships kept the living spaces of a vat-grown krogan, biotic convict and Blue Suns founder metres apart. The unremarkable data showed no major changes. All traces of charred machinery from blackpowder explosions were gone from Grunt's room, meaning Shepard had at last found and confiscated all the remaining makeshift firecrackers. The air freshener in Grunt's toilet was also still going (although if it failed the smell would probably have reached them before the data gave anything away). But when scanning Zaeed's room she saw something particularly eye-opening. Something that had nothing to do with the insane inhabitant for once. Her friend's scan had reached the same stage, maybe he saw it too.

"Hey Kenneth," she said. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

Kenneth looked up and stared at the wall, frowning in deep thought. "Yeah," he murmured. "How _do _volus practice autoerotic asphyxiation?"

Gabby snorted; too tired to pretend she didn't adore his sense of humour but still very much wanting an answer. "No, not that."

He laughed and turned to her, baggy eyes wide and brows raised. "You've never wondered?"

She shook her head. "It's a good question, no doubt. But I put to death all curious thoughts of alien fetishes when Joker 'accidentally' sent me that link."

"Yeah that was a good one!" Kenneth chortled. "Remember when he showed Garrus that picture of the demon baby from 'It's Alive' and told him it was the galaxy's first human/turian hybrid?"

They laughed together. It felt great being able to bring up Garrus' name in a light-hearted fashion again.

Kenneth yawned rubbed his eyes. "What _did _you want to know then?"

She pointed at his terminal and asked, "What's that on your screen, what does it tell you?"

Kenneth frowned again and examined every inch of the terminal's data, trying to see what she did. Was this a trick question?

"Gab," he said, once more meeting her eyes. "I see the same thing you see on your screen. We're running identical Engineering Deck room checks, what's your point?"

"Then you must also know that Gardener removed Zaeed's air conditioning two weeks ago," she said coolly, not looking at him. "Meaning that you _weren't _fixing it when I asked you what you were doing in his room."

Kenneth gulped. There was no anger in Gabby's voice. If anything she sounded hurt, disappointed by his lying.

"I was just wondering if you were frantically thinking up an excuse to cover up that rather enormous hole in your alibi," she added.

"Look Gabby I..."

"Good morning," said Tali as she marched into the room towards the terminal on their far left. Gabby sighed and decided to drop the subject until they were alone, and far from unlocked doors and intercoms. The duo responded in kind, silently disappointed that Tali hadn't, and probably wasn't going to praise their decision to arrive early. They hadn't done so much for so little adulation since Tech Academy. It helped though; the quarian's rare and elusive approval only drove them harder the previous day. It enabled growth. What they considered special, Tali considered routine. Maybe one day they would reach her standard.

With Tali here, they were best off suspending the conversation that would either lead to another fight or the fulfilling of their dreams.

_Dammit, back to work_, thought Gabby.

Another anomaly came up on her screen. She clucked her tongue. "Man I've reallygot to talk to Rupert about his plumbing tweaks down here, I mean look at this! The boiler's firing up early every morning and carrying on wayinto the night, operating at twice the normal speed, power and heat."

Kenneth's giggle was right on cue. "That's what Kelly sai-"

"Kenneth!"she hissed, "no more jokes on Shep and Kelly's...thing."

He laughed at this proposal. "And what was wrong with the last month and a half of jokes we dedicated to that particular subject?"

Gabby lowered her head and voice further. "Not sure if it's wise to talk about that with Tali in here," she said with a quick look at their boss, who was expectedly immersed in her work. "Rumour has it she was crushing pretty hard on Shepard on the SSV."

"Aye but...this is the SR-2." Kenneth looked at Tali thoughtfully, and then addressed Gabby with a curious look. "You think two years doesn't have any effect on feelings for someone you care ab-"

"No," she said, holding his gaze. "No I don't."

Brown eyes locked once more. Kenneth nodded slowly and curled his lips into a satisfied smile. "I don't either. Glad we agree," he said. The colour rose in their faces but neither turned away, neither wanted to turn away.

"Engineers, I'm going to need your personal security codes to get full access to the system," said Tali from far off.

They snapped out of it and resumed work, wondering if they would ever have a boss who knew when to refrain from interrupting a moment.

* * *

**Six hours later...**

Gabby and Ken's second day on the job under Tali's leadership was far more relaxed. She was still driving them hard and raising the bar but every now and then, informal chatter subtly found its way into their work. They had earned her respect.

It turned out Tali's presence was something of a mixed blessing for the duo, as putting such a proficient quarian in the lead engineering position on such an advanced ship left more free time that ever before. The same monotonous boredom that had slowed the very air during Tali's recruitment on Haestrom soon resurfaced. By midday, the bulk of their work was very much over, but regulations bound them to their workstations for at least another three hours. Routine scans and small adjustments almost always completed without error, but EDI kept reminding them that engineer supervision was required.

Fed up with counting the keys on his keyboard and too afraid to kick off a text conversation with Tali in the room, Kenneth broke the monotony.

"Well I'm not as big a fan of silence as you ladies seem to be," he said. The Power Engineer pulled a small radio transceiver out of his pocket. "How about some music?" He then carefully unfolded the device, clamped it to a nearby metal rail and hit 'play.'

"_Tonight on Box News: why quarian affirmative action could crash the galactic economy!" _

Tali stiffened and Gabby elbowed Kenneth's ribs, horrified.

"Sorry," Kenneth said sheepishly, fingers fumbling as he rushed to switch off the radio. "Illusive Man has every device on the ship automatically tuned to that. We keep trying to bypass it."

"Regulations on tampering with equipment are clear, Engineer Donnelly," said EDI.

"You just keep telling yourself that, lass," Kenneth muttered under his breath.

"Well isn't this a happy coincidence?" said a smooth, cheerful voice behind them.

Kasumi Goto prowled across the Engine Room floor, eyeing Tali and smiling like the cagey, predatory woman she was. She extended a black-suited and gloved arm to the Chief Engineer, who shook her hand.

"You must be Tali," she said as the hesitant quarian completed the gesture and retracted the three fingers. The thief bowed. "Kasumi Goto, pleased to meet you."

"What's a happy coincidence?" said Kenneth, cutting to the chase before even Tali could voice a response to the greeting. He'd had just about enough of her conniving ways. "There's bugger all going on down here."

_"Exactly!" _Kasumi exclaimed. "How nice that I would find myself bored to tears, but on the Engineering Deck with three hard workers who look like they could do with some excitement themselves!"

Tali turned back to the terminal. "Thank you but, we're fine Miss Goto."

Kasumi wrinkled her nose. "Ugh! Call me Kasumi, I feel so _old_ when people crack out the formalities." She strutted towards the Drive Core then stopped abruptly and leapt forwards onto the railing in front. Her colleagues turned the corner alarmed. Kasumi was always brave but seldom reckless.

They stopped and stared at the breath-taking image. Kasumi was perched perfectly – a sleek, black shape, crow-like with fiery eyes that were stable and comforting beacons against a backdrop of swirling, restless cerulean. The bright Core effortlessly mixed with the dark, exotic woman, lighting up all her alluring qualities. Kasumi's beauty, mischievousness and love of life were thrown out for them to see, bathing in an undying flood of brilliant blue. The silhouette sat there, still and unmoving, drawing all eyes to herself. Invisibility was only one area of her expertise. There were occasions that called for visibility so dazzling and perfect it masked her true intentions and eventual actions. Some heists could not be completed in the cosy confines of darkness that swallowed so easily and showed off so rarely. Some heists required convincing the victim they were totally safe, rather than coming in the night while he was tucked up in bed, surrounded by locked doors and bodyguards, feeling his most vulnerable and expecting the worst.

Every place has an exploitable environmental feature that can magnify or minimise visibility. For example; when stealing from a man of Intai'sei, Kasumi had learned that it was important to capitalise on the kinship he shared with beauty and bright colour, the familiarity he felt with the setting and rising sun. So she had flawlessly executed her move with the sun positioned just behind her, grabbing the trinket as he had stood engrossed in the glorious union of the woman before him with the heavenly orange incandescence of a setting sun beyond her. Kasumi smiled at her captivated shipmates, this complemented the image of the black and blue goddess with eyes of fire and lips decorated by a soft stroke of lavender. It was a smile toned down from the usual precursor to grabbing her prize. The smiles given to Kasumi's poor, gullible victims suggested everything yet promised nothing, drove them wild with desire as they hungered for her, for all the mysteries she held.

Gabby, Ken and Tali were mesmerised. They didn't know it of course; they would attribute their apparent catatonia with the hours of static work or sudden glare of the Core. But Kasumi knew her little trick had worked. They were more suggestible now.

"In addition to curing this crippling boredom," said the glowing goddess. "We could _all _benefit from getting to know each other a little better right?" she added with a wink at the quarian.

Gabby was the first to break free from her trance. "What do you propose then?" she asked.

Kasumi's answer was found in Kenneth. "You still got that vintage Skyllian Five pack I swiped from Zakera Ward for you?" she said.

Kenneth nodded. The goddess' benevolent gaze switched to Tali. "And I trust Shepard was kind enough to introduce your innocent, adolescent mind to the depraved wonders of human gambling games on the SSV, right Tali?"

"Of course," said Tali as she allowed a single, controlled laugh to leave her. She liked this woman.

"Then I suggest we resort to the ancient, universal art of risking lots of money for the sake of a cheap, competitive thrill," said Kasumi happily. "As for the 'getting to know each other' part...well, my grandfather once told me that you never see a more raw, honest version of a person than when their gambling."

"I hear that," Kenneth muttered. He rubbed his hands together in anticipation. "And I'm up for it, on _one _condition."

Kasumi tried and once again failed to feign a look of surprised innocence. "What condition?"

"You tell us your ulterior motive, now!"he barked, pointing an accusatory finger.

_Well well, sometimes men __**are **__observant, _Kasumi thought.

The thief cocked her black-hooded, blue-enshrouded head to one side. "Must I always have ulterior motives?"

"YES," said Gabby and Ken together as Tali watched the exchange, intrigued.

Kasumi only smiled further. They were right about her having a concealed agenda, but had no idea what it was. "Maybe Tali secretly called me down here...maybe she'll only trust non-Cerberus people and requires my assistance in vanquishing you both once and for all!"

Tali shook her head then looked at the duo, who met her bright eyes.

"Oh I don't know," the quarian said. Was that playfulness in her voice? "These two aren't so bad."

Gabby and Ken dared to smile. Tali _was_ the person Shepard had praised her as.

Happy as she was with Tali's verbal olive branch, Gabby resisted the tantalising offer. "We've got one more day to go until Ilium, can't you wait?" she asked.

Kasumi frowned defiantly and folded her arms, making her balancing act on the railing appear even more remarkable. The crow-like idol of restless blue was shattered, Kasumi now seemed like a cat; forever ending up in precarious positions yet never faltering.

"Oh come onyou three!" she urged. "I know you're as bored as I am right now."

Kasumi then leapt off her thin support, floated across the room and leaned over the rail opposite, overlooking Jack's sacrosanct territory. The lighting was set at its usual seedy dark red glow, but Jack's curled-up, snoring silhouette was discernable. "Hey Jack! You in?" she called.

Jack yawned and stretched gracelessly, "poker?" she breathed.

"Yeah."

"Strip or regular?"

Kasumi's slender neck muscles twitched as she fought the urge to turn around and bring this question to the other players. For a fleeting moment it seemed funny, and a perfect opportunity to advance her standing in this unfolding duel with Kelly. Gabby and Ken had been undressing one another in dream and daydreamland for a while now. But then there was Tali to consider. The quarian was still very tense from the chaotic events of the last couple of days, and to even the dimmest mind was in no mood to put up with any more jokes about her lifelong confinement in that purple getup.

"Regular," Kasumi finally said.

"Fuck off then," said Jack through another small yawn. She rolled over on the makeshift bed, away from the other young woman.

Unfazed, the enigmatic thief opened up an on-ship communications channel on Garrus' omni-tool. "Hey there, it's Kasumi. I'm in here with three bored grease monkeys, you b- sorry honey!" She winked at Tali again. "Twogrease monkeys and Tali. You boys up for joining us in some Skyllian Five?"

"Nah," said the unmistakable gravelly voice of Zaeed through the holographic device's speaker. "This goddamn kid hasn't even mastered Jenga yet, I still don't think he's ready for - NO!"

The four colleagues heard the oddly satisfying sound of a collapsing assembly of wooden blocks. Gabby, Ken and Kasumi smiled while Tali looked confusedly from one face to another, trying to understand the situation and source of their amusement.

"You gotta pokethe middle ones out with yourfingerson, like _this!" _Zaeed hissed, voice still blaring from the glowing device. "Don't think you can get around without accurate hand-eye coordination! How else do you think I managed to escape Antoine Gianfranco's dungeon? If I hadn't poked my way through that security system's circuit boards with nothing but a disembodied salarian cock Id've-"

"Okay," chirped a disgusted yet amused Kasumi as she switched off the device. "Thanks for the nightmares Zaeed."

Kenneth whipped out a dog-eared but still useable pack of cards from the private compartment beneath his terminal and took a seat on the floor with a flash of mean, competitive determination in his brown eyes. Kasumi and Tali followed suit.

"I think I'll deal this time," said Gabby as she sat down in the neutral spot on the floor between Kenneth and Kasumi. She didn't know Tali well yet, but their intense working hours had revealed the kind of honest work ethic that didn't seem too compatible with Skyllian Five cheating. Keeping Kenneth and Kasumi from resorting to dirty tactics however, would require superhuman effort.

Kenneth was less than enthusiastic about her chosen role. He stood up and pulled her around the railed corner towards the Drive Core, away from the other two women. Kasumi stared at the floor panels to conceal her smile.

_How many times have you wanted to do __that__Kenneth?_

"Gab, are you out of your mind?" Kenneth hissed in a desperate, hushed manner.

"What?" she said, unsure of the reason for his panic. "I think it's fairer for me to deal this time, give Tali the chance to win something other than Matthews' heart, don't you?"

He ignored this. "And leave meto fend against these two? Look at those bloody poker faces! One's barely visible at the best of times and the other one…" he leaned around the corner and stole a glance at Tali, who was making small talk with Kasumi but still rather tense. "There isn'tanother one!" he finished with an even greater desperation in his voice.

Gabby wasn't risking any of her money; Ilium's souvenir stores were the finest in the galaxy and she'd never forgive herself if she left the planet behind without getting Kenneth anything.

"Kenny," she said softly. "There's something you're forgetting."

"What?"

She laid a hand on his shoulder and squeezed.

"They can teek yuhr money but theh'll nevurrr teek yuhr frrreedumm!" she said, in perhaps the worst Scottish accent ever voiced.

He tried to frown, tried to act shocked, tried to feign fury and counter with a remark connecting America's rising sea levels with their obesity problem but just couldn't. He could only guffaw and clasp the hand on his shoulder, leaning toward her. Gabby's eyes widened.

"I'll keep that in mind," he whispered, before letting go and marching back to the other players, leaving a flustered, breathless Gabby behind. "Time to kick some arse!"

* * *

**Three hours later…**

"Sod it, I fold," sighed Kenneth as he surrendered his last hand. Tali went all in, her uncertainty and lack of killer instinct nullifying a flawless poker face. Kasumi, while not possessing the experiential edge of Kenneth or Tali's advantageously-obscured facial features, had secured victory through the subtle social graces only a lifelong thief could have mastered.

Tali revealed her hand; a good but not great Redshift Flush. Kasumi had underestimated her, but it still wasn't enough. Not today.

The thief laid her own, winning hand down. "Supernova!" she declared. "Better luck next time, guy and gal!"

Gabby let out an awed whistle and looked at the three players with a mixture of pity and respect in her face. "Whoa," she said, "final winnings are five hundred creds overall." She settled her eyes on Kenneth. "Guess that 'Phil Mcavity' joke really riled you up."

Kenneth's face almost matched his hair and he leaned forward aggressively. "That and the fifty others!" he snapped.

Gabby laid a hand on his shoulder again. "Fair's fair Kenneth. Let her have the money," she said, sounding sympathetic but firm.

Kenneth grumbled as he channelled his share from his omni-tool into what he thought was Kasumi's. Gabby's Ilium gift would have to wait. Tali remained silently disappointed as she did the same.

Kasumi redirected the transaction to her bedroom's private terminal. "Don't worry Ken," she said. "I'm sure Gabby'll think of a way to cheer you up!"

Cat and crow-like once more, she leapt up and slipped away before hearing even a single half-hearted congratulatory remark from the losers and dealer.

"Bye guys! Nice meeting you Tali!" she called as the door closed.

The smile tugging at the master thief's soft, painted lips was incendiary by even her upbeat standards. It didn't take much imagination to see their blushing faces at that last remark. And with some real money finally entering the picture, this duel with Kelly was about to get interesting. She wondered why the sociable yeoman had shied away from everyone today.

"Attention SR-2, this is Commander Shepard." Everyone, including the groggy Jack (now playing Five Finger Fillet with a shard of Collector skull) froze and stared up to the nearest speaker. "We'll be docking at Nos Astra Spaceport on Ilium first thing tomorrow morning." The usually laid back Shepard sounded far more stately this time. It seemed being caught with your pants down could pacify the ego of any man. "Installation for the new guns and armour's going to take a while, so you'd all better pack your things. This will be a long-term stay."

"Wow, actual sunlight at last," said Kenneth with a longing stare into the Drive Core.

"I'll get the SPF 10 000," Gabby droned as she left the room.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From:** KasumiG

**To:** KellyGrrrl

**Subject:** Our friendly bet

So I just played an entire Skyllian Five game with Tali and the lovebirds.

…500 credits for me! What say you we add it to the prize money? 78 credits is SOOO boring.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From:** KellyGrrrl

**To:** KasumiG

**Subject:** Re: Our friendly bet

How nice for you, but let's keep it simple for now xx

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From:** KasumiG

**To:** KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Re: Re: Our friendly bet

Not even angry that I played an entire - I repeat _an entire Skyllian Five game_ with the grease monkeys without notifying you or Romeo? Does _nothing_ provoke you?

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To: **KasumiG

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: Our friendly bet

Like I said, it's best to keep things simple xx

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: Re: Our friendly bet

Good...

Btw, the other day while you changed your shirt? I hacked into your terminal and examined their psych profile ;-) xoxox

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From:** KellyGrrrl

**To:** KasumiG

**Subject:** Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Our friendly bet

You're on.

* * *

**For those of you who don't get the **_**It's Alive**_** reference, I dare you to Google it.**


	10. Ilium

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 2, CIC**

"Alright, I'm gonna ask this one more time," said a very tired Commander Shepard looking over the SR-2's crew, who were now assembled in a cramped mass stretching from the deck's airlock down the main bridge. "Are you sureyou're all packed and ready for Nos Astra Hotel?" Their luggage was assembled on, under and around the tables on the third deck.

The wave of murmuring which followed contained liberal amounts of both certainty and uncertainty. Organising the latest shore leave wasn't going as smoothly as the Commander wanted. He was starting to resent allowing Kelly to make most of the arrangements, and the rest of the crew seem to have picked up on the lack of order. In the last three hours Gardener had unpacked and repacked all the ship's ingredients several times, worried that an anti-Cerberus agent could have been planted into the construction teams, ready to lace their food with cyanide. The Mess Sergeant had eventually relented, but only under the combined efforts of Miranda and Shepard. And Zaeed and Grunt still weren't paying attention. Grunt was putting a great deal of effort into jerking his python-like arm, trying to get the stringed ball back into the cup while Zaeed timed him on an omni-tool stopwatch.

"C'mon kid!" he growled, tapping the bright orange countdown. "Coordination, focus!"

"Ready when you are Shepard," said the always serious Garrus. His omni-tool had shown up in Mess Sergeant Gardener's utility room, between a discarded red rose and rough sketch of that human who stole the Mona Lisa. Normally the inquisitive former C-Sec agent would have pursued the mystery, but there was always too much calibrating to do.

Shepard sighed again, grateful for Garrus' readiness but growing frustrated with the rest of his team. He found that dealing with mutated alien horrors or mercenaries armed to the teeth had pretty much become standard routine, woven into instinct. But the crew were a different story sometimes.

Near the back of the crowd, Hawthorne was showing a series of downloaded Ilium brochures to Hadley and Matthews.

"Which after-dark show do you think we should go to first?" he asked, maximising the 'Adult Entertainment' file. "Cyan Sluts, Big Blue Jugs or Caboose on the Loose?"

"What about this place?" said Matthews, "Dextro-DNA Dancers?"

"Nah," said Hadley. "That's just a place for lonely turians."

"Wait a minute!" said Patel from somewhere in the dense crowd, "where are Ga-"

"Gabby, Ken and Tali are staying behind to overlook engineering one more time," said Shepard. "It's their workplace that's being altered. They'll be with us in a few minutes."

With this the crowd's unrest died down somewhat. Shepard always drew respect towards himself, and despite any initial difficulty, the crew always followed him no matter how bizarre the situation.

Though none of them had yet figured out how to tactfully point out the lipstick smear still on his neck.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineer's Quarters**

Shepard and Miranda clashed from day one on the SR-2, over almost every last detail. The "alpha male – dominant female posturing" as Kasumi called it, had not come as a surprise to anybody. Dual stubborn egos and brilliant minds rarely made ideal partners.

Shepard's most vehement complaint had been over the necessity to stamp a distinctive logo on everything if Cerberus were so hung up on secrecy. Everyone may have agreed with the Commander, but the prospect of invoking Miranda's wrath kept their mouths shut. But Shepard's proposed compromise; removing the logo from the Normandy's hull but keeping it on the uniform, had been refused and the two hadn't spoken on any matters not relating to the mission since.

But today there would probably be less bickering. The SR-2's private docking bay would keep the large Cerberus insignia hidden, and as an extra precaution Shepard had ordered everyone not accompanying him to Liara's office to wear casual clothing. Both Commanding and Executive Officer seemed satisfied with this, though for the squad it was an unusual request. Grunt had needed to place an order for specially-made clothes as there were few krogan his size in the known galaxy, Kasumi's choice of a black hoodie and matching tight pants did very little to alter her usual look and the large bump on Zaeed's lower back gave away a kinetic barrier generator kept under his high-collared shirt. Other than these problems, the changeover proved relatively painless.

After spending several aimless minutes rummaging through her dresser for something appropriate, Gabby came across the same Grateful Dead t-shirt and jeans she had worn during that unforgettable day on the Edmonton Campus.

_Why did I even pack these?_

She hadn't given it much thought. Nostalgia had been the dominant motivator behind her packing for the SR-2. As happy a memory as it was, Gabby was not keen on inducing more false hope. The mission was getting more urgent and complex with each passing day, and her crush on Kenneth still hadn't subsided.

And there was stillthe issue of him lying over what had transpired with Zaeed the other day. Kenneth had changed the subject every time she'd tried to bring it up, topping of his act by pretending to fall asleep when their usual through-the-wall bedtime banter was about to commence. She wasn't angry with him, just surprised that something had come up which he didn't feel he could trust her with. It was most unusual, considering he'd ended up poisoned. Though she was hoping Kenneth would relent by the time they reached Nos Astra Hotel. They'd been working extremely hard under Tali's leadership and shore leave had come at just the right time.

_Might as well wear the jeans, I've been sitting around in here long enough._

A thrilling thought then came to her. She quickly got changed and left her room before the impulse died down and that all-too-familiar rationality could resurface

The shirt and jeans still fitted her no problem, but Kenneth didn't know that.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

"Well that's the last of 'em," said Kenneth, setting down the final sealed toolbox on the floor.

"Shepard asked for one last report before installation began," said Tali. She headed over to her terminal and began downloading it into a blank datapad. "Then we're done here."

"Kenneth?"

It was Gabby, and she sounded excited about something. Ilium was a marvel, no doubt but every other time Gabby had showed more interest during the landing cycle than the actual shore leave. He turned around to address her.

"What is it Ga- Oh!"

Kenneth hadn't seen her in thatoutfit since Tech Academy. There was a bright mischievousness in her eyes.

"Yeah," Gabby said with a nervous grin. "I was just going through my things and found these. But um…" Her expression changed and she very slowly began to turn around. "I don't think they fit me anymore."

Kenneth rubbed the back of his neck and tried to think of another subject to discuss, what was Gabby doing? And why was she lowering her voice like that?

"Kenneth?" she breathed, now facing away from him with her hands on her hips.

"Hmmm?" was all he could manage.

"Do you think these jeans are uh…tootight?They don't make my ass look big do they?"

Kenneth's eyes snapped towards the area in question before her sentence even finished. She said something else, but he didn't quite pick it up. It was very warm in the Engine Room. He was supposed to be doing something, something to do with the toolboxes but couldn't remember the details. His mind seemed to have jammed.

What had she said? 'They don't make my…'

His eyes widened.

_Oh, Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the donkey that took them all to Bethlehem it's __glorious!_

He tried to voice some form of response, but found his throat was far too dry. "Um…"

"Thanks Ken, that's all I needed to know," Gabby chirped in a manner worthy of Kelly Chambers herself. She slipped out of the room before he could elaborate further on the state of her behind.

"Right then," he muttered, still rather befuddled. All of a sudden he remembered Tali's presence and prayed she hadn't picked up on his reaction.

But the Chief Engineer was busy taking one last look at the magnificent room. "She's beautiful isn't she?" said Tali.

"No," said Kenneth defensively, standing bolt upright and giving her the look of a man accused of theft. Tali stared at him. Kenneth sensed her disapproval.

"Well _yes _of course she is but I never really…I mean I always thought she was but…but not in _that way, _and…and I'm not saying she's ugly or unappealing and that I don't think she's good looking or anything because…because I always thought Gabby was…was pretty but, but as a friend y'know? Not in a kind of perverted, lecherous way or anything like that, I mean…what I'm trying to...what I'm trying to say is that she's really pretty but...I never really...you know we're _friends _and all but, I alwa-"

"Engineer Donnelly, I was talking about the Normandy."

His eyebrows shot upwards and face reddened, clashing with the permanent blue shadow cast by the Drive Core in a most unsightly way. He had sounded like Mordin trying to save a marriage.

"Oh…um." He visualised himself getting beaten by a disembodied hand.

_Fucking great Kenneth Donnelly!__Add another one to the list of women on this bloody ship who know about your feelings but won't help because you're too proud to ask for it!_

"The Commander is waiting for us, Engineer Donnelly." Tali sounded calm and business-like, but he'd been around enough teasing sapients to detect the amused edge in her voice.

"Right." His breath seemed to have failed him for a few seconds.

It was veryhot in the Engine Room today.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 2, CIC**

When the three engineers arrived on the CIC they found the ship's remaining occupants crowding the airlock. Matthews squeaked and moved to the front when he spotted Tali.

Shepard would take up his business with Liara at her office in the centre of Nos Astra's famed Veus Market. He would be accompanied by Jacob and Miranda due to their previous work with Liara, along with Garrus and Tali, who were familiar faces in a more friendly sense. Everybody else of the SR-2's combat squad and on-ship crew was to be escorted straight to Nos Astra Hotel via first class bus. With Jacob, Miranda and Garrus gone Kelly was the authority. As the airlock opened and daylight spilled through, the yeoman gave Shepard a very long, nonverbal goodbye, blocking the crowd as they tried to rush out.

Gabby still felt rather dizzy; feeling Kenneth's eyes on her had been nothing short of thrilling. She would no doubt scold herself later on for being so forward and reckless, but right now the Propulsion Engineer just felt too damn happy. Kenneth's dumbfounded silence and goldfish-like facial expression meant he had liked what he saw. She almost skipped out of the airlock onto the hangar's walkway and felt her jaw drop when catching her first glimpse of the view.

Ilium was every bit as beautiful and awe-inspiring as its reputation suggested. The capital Nos Astra was a vibrant megalopolis stretching out further than the eye could see and beyond what the imagination could visualise, possessing the spectacular look of the Citadel Wards, made warmer and more welcoming by its planetside setting. Even from orbit she had seen that every inch of the planet's surface seemed covered by grandiose office buildings, apartments and markets in slender, towering form – dwarfing even the finest that Earth had erected in its newest golden age. From every angle the traffic shot through the air like enormous fireflies, above and between a labyrinthine maze of skyscrapers. A thousand neon lights from a thousand billboards attempted to grab her attention all at once. Everything was for sale on Ilium and it was marketed to every species.

Ilium was a volus world, but had been the main trade hub for asari-owned corporations for several hundred years. It was a celebration of wealth and achievement, of extravagance and privilege. It magnified and proudly displayed all the positive traits of asari and volus culture; making it a never ending flow of money contained within ageless and elegant architecture.

But the planet's beauty masked a sinister underbelly of crime. Ruthlessness was the single rule in many places on Ilium, and almost nothing but first degree murder was outlawed. Zaeed had spoken of the planet only once, calling parts of it 'Omega with finer silks.' To survive, to live long enough to enjoy the all the elicit perks of the trade capital of the Terminus Systems required mistrust of everyone and loyalty to only yourself. Mainstream society was safe and satisfying for many, but rising to the very top however; required a willingness to sacrifice anyone in the way of your success; friend, foe or loved one. Ilium was fit to burst with mobsters, assassins and Donovan Hock-type businessmen prospering under the not so watchful eyes of well-bribed law enforcement.

But these cold, hard truths were little more than nagging annoyances in the back of Gabby's mind. In this moment she simply appreciated the incredible sight, the honour of working under someone like Shepard and the warmth of Kenneth's company.

She tore her eyes away from the heavenly city and turned to him. He looked every bit as stunned as she. Even the Glorified Fratboys and their sexually-challenged friend were standing and staring in appreciative silence.

Gabby didn't even register the photo Kasumi took on her omni-tool; her and Kenneth stood side-by-side, gazing over Ilium's diamond-studded landscape and into the horizon, where nature and technology became a bright and brilliant whole.

"Here it is guys!" said Kelly over the wail of a strong wind that hit the docking bay. A sleek, silver asari transport broke away from the stream of traffic and hovered over a smaller dock several metres left of the ship's exit ramp.

Jack pushed her way to the front, making every Cerberus crew member cower as she passed. She took her place at the back of the right row. Then came Kasumi and Kelly, Rolston and Patel, Hawthorne and Hadley, Matthews and Goldstein, Gardener and Joker, Grunt and Zaeed, Mordin and finally – Gabby and Ken. Additional security and tech personnel, led by Chief of Security Bert would catch the next bus.

By the time she stepped onto the bus with a still silent and rather dazed Kenneth at her side, Gabby noticed pandemonium was already threatening to end their journey before it could even begin. Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews were arguing over who got to use their room if they all ended up getting lucky. Jack lit up two cigars at once and was busy puffing smoke into the humid bus air. Gardener was apologising for treading on Joker's foot, or at least trying to apologise over the torrent of obscenities coming from the helmsman's mouth.

Then there was Zaeed, explaining human tribal warfare to Grunt in a very loud voice.

"Well," he said thoughtfully. "There's the Scots who hate the English, the Irish who hate the English, the Welsh, who hate the English and the of course the English, who _really _fucking hate the English."

Kelly stood up, stepped to the front of the bus and handed a credit chit to the sweating and shaking salarian driver. "For your trouble," she muttered.

Gabby and Ken settled into their seats, resting on the assurance that Shepard's money and influence would save them from being at the centre of a planetary incident. Gabby, who was seated by the window, continued wondering when Kenneth would regain his ability to speak.

The bus made a total of three stops en route to the hotel. The first was outside a Galactic Rifle Association meeting, where a silent, brooding krogan got on, locking eyes with Grunt until his departure at the second stop where a loud asari matriarch and her daughter boarded. They sat at the front of the left row.

"And that's what's wrong with Liara T'soni's generation!" boomed the matriarch with no attempt at tact or discretion. "Now as for yourgeneration…"

"Mom, please!"the asari matron moaned. "Can't you just go back to pressuring me into finding a bondmate?"

"Be careful what you wish for young lady!" countered the matriarch. She examined her daughter head-to-toe and shook her head. "You're 387 years old, practically on the shelf! And there are so many suitors on Ilium."

Hawthorne and Hadley, who had been watching the two asari with the same wordless, awestruck appreciation they had given the first sight of Ilium, straightened in their seats.

"Oh man I am sousing our room tonight!" Hawthorne breathed.

"What're you talking about?" said Hadley, screwing up his face. "She was clearly talking about me!"

Before continuing this exchange, the Fratboys realised Matthews' absence from it. They leaned towards him. He was seated on the opposite row, next to Goldstein who had once again possessed the common sense to indulge in her omni-tool's music through earphones while the men around her regressed into sex-crazed apes.

From her seat near the front, Kasumi examined her pet project from engineering and nudged the redhead beside her.

"He'll never learn will he?" said Kelly. "Matthews, I mean."

"That's not why I nudged you," said Kasumi. "It's Gabby and Ken again."

"What?"

"I can't figure out why they aren't saying anything to each other," she said. "In fact, I haven't seen or heard them speak since they started cleaning up engineering back on the Normandy. You'd think now that they're cooped up all cosy next to one another they'd be yammering away but..." She frowned. "Gabby's staring at the window like a kid in a candy store and he's just...he looks like he's seen a damn ghost!"

Kelly gave no response, prompting a more insistent nudge from Kasumi.

"Aren't you going to start interrogating me?" said the thief, eyes still on the couple. "Y'know, ask me what I think of Tali and the impact she can have on our duel? C'mon Kelly I thought you were being competitive!"

"You think it may have been something Tali said?" Kelly asked.

"Tali was a really sweet girl when I went down to meet her," said Kasumi. "Matthews had it coming to him, but I can't see her snapping with somebody like Kenneth. Even if he can be a royal pain in the a-"

"Yes...yes you're right about Tali," said Kelly. "I had a lovely chat with her earlier actually. She's not what I expected, I like her."

Kasumi looked from the duo to Kelly, who had crossed her arms and was staring straight forward, not smiling. Kelly's voice had must have sounded convincing enough to herself, but Kasumi had sensed a little too much sweetness.

"But…?"

"She looks up to Shepard," said Kelly who was still staring forward, the false sweetness in her tone gone. "She _really _looks up to him."

Kasumi shrugged, but knew where this was going. "They're friends, what's your point?"

"My fema-"

"Again with the female intuition!" Kasumi exclaimed.

"You don't sense it?" said Kelly, dropping her voice to a determined whisper.

Kasumi just clucked her tongue playfully and grinned at the passing city through the window.

"Oh poor Kelly, it seems you've picked not one but two unwinnable fights in the last few days, haven't you?"

"It's not funny!" Kelly hissed. "What am I going to do?I can't spice things up in the bedroom any further without injuring at least one of us! I mean just last night I let him put his-"

Kasumi held up a stiff hand.

"Okay, Kelly? You know that there are many, manythings I would do for you. But listening to all the lurid details of what goes on in the ship's loft day in and day out, is not one of them."

Kelly looked as if she was about to continue pursuing the subject, but held back. Kasumi's tone had left no room for argument. She huffed and sank further into her seat, crossing her arms tighter.

"I'm just frustratedis all!" she said. "Right now he's probably in Liara T'soni's office, and we all know how _she _felt about him!"

"One fight at a time Kelly," said Kasumi with an encouraging pat on her friend's shoulder. "One fight at a time."

The bus' third and final stop was outside the Nos Astra Nature Preserve – a single lush green spot in an otherwise overdeveloped city. The asari matriarch and her daughter left. They went unnoticed by the lustful human men left behind, who were still too busy arguing. No new passengers joined, but the driver was hassled for a few minutes by a rather eccentric blonde man in what appeared to be imitation N7 armour. The man had no money on him but insisted on being let on; citing 'undercover business' as his reason. When pushed for credentials he lost patience and stormed off.

* * *

**Ilium, Nos Astra Hotel, Entrance Hall**

Finally, the bus touched down just outside the magnificent Nos Astra Hotel and its salarian driver said a relieved goodbye. The crew felt rather strange walking on solid ground in the shadow of such a towering city. Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews wasted no time continuing their verbal jousting once the shock wore off, only to be stopped by the sight of Jack lighting up her biotics.

The hotel's entrance hall was like a grand, circular ballroom with a single desk in the centre. Bright blue Thessian silks covered every wall, complementing a lapis lazuli floor. The room's many gold-rimmed doorways were flanked by weathered statues which according to the brochure dated back to the earliest battles of the Krogan Rebellions. A stunning asari concierge in a tight, low-cut dress greeted them with a bow and dazzling smile.

"Welcome to Nos Astra Hotel, Dr. T'soni and Commander Shepard have seen to all financial transactions, I just need-"

"Yeah, yeah!" said Jack, pushing and shoving her way to the front of the crowd once again. "Where do we get shitfaced?"

The asari's smile faltered, but she regained her composure with surprising quickness.

"Beverages of a refreshing nature will be available around the clock from your quarters on the fifth floor, provided you use the privilege in moderation" she said evenly. "We also have a wide range of bars, restaurants, room service options and-"

"Right, right!" said Jack with an irritable wave of her tattooed hands. "Didn't ask for your life story, shit!"

"I apologize," said the concierge with a nervous tremble entering her tone. "I just need a signature from 'K. Chambers?' and you can be on your way. Is she here?"

"That's me." Kelly marched forward and took a datapad.

"Complete room bookings," said the concierge. "Just punch that code at the bottom into your omni-tool and you can download a copy. Each of you will also have to pick up a keycard before you settle in.

"Uh…huh," Kelly muttered without looking up from the datapad's text. It was not like her to be distant with anybody. She scanned the schedule, and then gave a wild grin. "That's fantastic!" she almost shouted.

The concierge nodded and smiled in return; humans were nerve-wracking and confusing to her sometimes.

"Well..." she said, "enjoy your stay here at Nos Astra."

Kenneth's nudge to Gabby came as quite a shock. His trance had ended.

"What's she so happy about?" he whispered. "Her and Shepard's room come with complementary nipple clamps?"

"_Kenneth!" _Gabby hissed through fervent giggles.

The party picked up their keycards from another beautiful and provocatively-dressed asari stood by one of the many doorways and passed through it, heading for their rooms. Shepard had booked the entire fifth floor. They turned a corner and headed down a long corridor, which like the Entrance Hall was decorated by fine Thessian silks and priceless art, but in a darker shade of blue.

"Isn't this exciting?" said Kelly. Jack cracked her knuckles.

"Don't know why you're so pleased, Kelly," said Kasumi silkily, stepping between Jack and Kelly before a one-sided biotic beatdown could erupt. "In fact if I were you I'd complain, maybe even get Shepard or T'soni to set things straight." She took the datapad from Kelly's hand and stopped, causing everyone else to do the same.

"What do you mean Kasumi?" said Kelly. There was a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

"There's clearly been a mix-up, hon." The thief prowled in a silent but menacing circle around Gabby and Ken. "According to this…" She paused, relishing the moment. Gabby felt the familiar blush burning in her cheeks. "Engineers Daniels and Donnelly will be sharing a room…and a bed."

Gabby visualised Kelly and Kasumi getting beaten up by several disembodied hands.


	11. Arrangements

**Spinoff "Grunt and Zaeed" is now up.**

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor**

Kenneth was frozen, and at a total loss for words for the second time that day. He was very much aware of the chorus of laughter, wolf-whistling and jeering cascading around him like every other occasion when his not so secret feelings for Gabby entered the spotlight. But he was far more angered than embarrassed this time. The newest handing out of gossip ammunition for the SR-2's crew had not been his fault, but the well-meaning faux pas of Kelly Chambers. He should've known something like this would happen with her in charge. When were Shepard and Lawson going to return? They'd set everything right.

Gabby was by his side, staring at the floor and blushing so hard she resembled sunrise on Vamshi. The small, surrounding crowd began to encircle the mortified duo, trapping them. For a moment, Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews forgot about their heated disagreement and broke out into a well-rehearsed song they had been waiting weeks for the right opportunity to share.

"Kenny and Gabby, sitting in a tree, f-u-c-"

"Shut it!"growled Gabby through gritted teeth. They ceased.

Once again, the more level-headed members of the Normandy crew showed far more tact and decorum that their Fratboy colleagues but nonetheless failed to subdue their amusement or change the subject. Goldstein, Rolston and Patel shook with silent laughter in their own little group; even Dr. Chakwas cracked a smile. Jack was the farthest away from them (and had the least amount of love for Cerberus or any of its members) but still considered this amusing enough to laugh midway through carving her name into a wall. Grunt and Zaeed then ceased their timed ball in a cup marathon to do their own staring at the embarrassed couple.

"I don't understand it," said Grunt, his thick voice reverberating over every other in the corridor. "The human Daniels blushes and splutters, yet is a healthy female of breeding age presented with an opportunity to start her own clan with a familiar member of the opposite sex, there is no logic here!"

Zaeed shook his head as the crew laughed even louder at this observation.

"Look kid," Zaeed muttered as he wagged a finger in Grunt's enormous face. "I may be prepared to teach you how to properly kill, gamble, drink, smoke, drive and all, but I _ain't _goin' down that road."

"Bah!" spat the krogan. "You humans are all prudish and sentimental!"

"Bloody virgin!"

"Guys," said Kasumi, appearing from nowhere once more to settle between the dumbfounded Gabby and Ken and laying a hand on their shoulders. "Kelly I will go back down to reception and see if they can rectify this before nightfall."

She nodded to Kelly and the two women headed away from the crowd, back down towards the entrance hall.

"Zaeed, lead the group to their rooms please," said Kelly over her shoulder.

Zaeed jerked his head in affirmation. It was the biggest response he was prepared to give to a Kelly-issued order, but she represented Shepard, and he was far from disloyal.

"The hell am I, chopped liver?" said Joker, now leaning against Gardener with an arm draped over the Mess Sergeant's shoulder and his busted foot in the air. Joker had a point; he was the highest-ranked member of the crew in Kelly's absence, but this was not a point anybody else was prepared to argue in Zaeed's presence.

"I'll send an asari chiropodist up to your room!" Kelly called back from the far end of the corridor. Joker relented, appeased, and looked to Zaeed in acknowledgement of his new authority.

"Now then!" barked the mercenary, standing before the remaining crew who all formed a line in the wide corridor (with the exception of Jack, now checking her omni-tool for the correct date to accompany her carved name).

"We're at the gate of the Terminus Systems," Zaeed said, "surrounded by people who want to see to our every need. That means…" he began pacing up and down before them with clenched fists, no doubt immersed in more memories, "trust nobody, suspect everybody, never go off with strangers, don't sign anything without reading the small or encrypted print, keep an eye on all food and drink; I've got a scanner for that sort of thing, stay away from windows cause you never know when a sniper might have his eye on you."

He walked over to the nearest window. "Deceptively thick," he said to the group, and slammed his fist against it three times. "Any Terminus-issue round could bust that thing." This point was pretty well-illustrated, as the window now bore a long, thin crack.

"Elevator will take us straight to the fifth floor, should be big enough for all of us. Try to stay in single file when walking down the corridors to your rooms though, give the others a chance to run if the person in front gets taken down."

He slapped the shield generator on his back and a flicker of bright energy enshrouded him. "Let's go!"

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor**

"We're not even going back to reception are we?" said Kasumi, leaning against the blue-tiled wall of the women's bathroom as Kelly straightened her hair before an oval mirror.

"No," said Kelly. "I'll send Zaeed a message saying the receptionist's hands are tied. They aren't going to protest when hearing it from _that _guy."

Kasumi chuckled. "And just how are you going to explain this to Gabby and Ken when Zaeed's out of the picture and they're free to complain to you and you alone? Or better yet, get Lawson or Mr Wonderful himself to help out?"

"I'll just claim that this is a classic case of bureaucratic deadlock and they won't be able to arrange rebooking the room for at least another week. That should be enough time for Gabby and Ken to crack." She turned to Kasumi, wielding a lipstick tube. "You think he'll like this shade?"

"Kelly you've got a lot to learn about lying," said Kasumi, ignoring the question. _"Why _can't they rebook the room for another week?"

"Through traffic," said Kelly. She drew out another tube and began examining it.

"Through traffic?"said Kasumi. "You're not even trying anymore, are you? What through traffic?"

Kelly frowned at her dolled-up reflection. "You're suddenly very helpful for a rival," she said. "Why's that?"

"Oh it's nothing you should feel suspicious about. I just don't want you to lose thateasily, it'll be more fun winning with you still in the running, thinking you can actually beat me."

Kelly shook her head and examined yet another tube.

"So now that my intentions are cleared up," said Kasumi, "you still need to convince me why 'through traffic' is an acceptable excuse."

"Y'know…" said Kelly. She decided pale pink would have to decorate Shepard's nether regions later on and applied the lipstick. "We're part of an enormous and endlessly complex interstellar society now Kasumi. Every day the authorities try and fail to keep track of trillions of sapients, extranet bandwidth always overloads, cosmic horrors mass on the edge of the galaxy with almost nobody being any the wiser. What's so implausible about a hotel that for all its grandeur can't deal with a bombardment of arrangements, cancellations et cetera?"

"Because this place is almost empty?" said Kasumi. "NA Hotel's the most expensive in the entire system. You'll have a hard time convincing anybody that this place is too packed."

"Uh huh," Kelly muttered. She was too busy smacking her lips and pouting to really pay attention to this comment.

"Kelly?" Kasumi said with a patronising wave of her hands. "You still there?"

Kelly paused her lipstick testing and smiled suggestively. "Maybe Gabby and Ken will be too preoccupied to notice," she said.

Kasumi shook her head and clucked her tongue. Kelly really had a lot to learn about this sort of thing.

"This isn't prison Kelly! Those two aren't going to end up having sex because you've forced them into close proximity!"

"I've got backup plans," said Kelly, now testing breast firmness through her shirt. "I'm starting to droop," she quietly added with a sigh.

"Interesting to see where they'll go," said Kasumi. Kelly's flushed face snapped towards her.

"Is it?" she retorted. "I know men, as soon as he notices he'll go straightinto the arms of Miranda! How am I supposed to compete with…_those?" _

"No," said Kasumi, half-laughing but suppressing it for friendship's sake. "I was talking about your backup – never mind." She opened the door. "Time to get back to the others I think, our luggage is due any minute. Besides, I may have flunked physics but I know droopy boobs only go in one direction."

Kelly shook her head and sighed again. Kasumi had no idea what it was like dating such a sought-after man.

"You go back to the others," said Kasumi as they exited, returning to the ground floor corridor. "I'm going out to get some fresh air."

"And just what will you be doing while breathing this air?" said a narrow-eyed Kelly, showing some sign of improvement in this on-going game of mistrust.

"You'll thank me later." And with that, the thief was gone, swallowed up by silken blue surroundings as her tactical cloak came on.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor**

_God, just __look__at us, _Kenneth thought as his eyes wandered over the huge (and as always: slow) elevator's occupants. _A woman who's too good to be true, a cook, a pilot, a psycho, an experiment, another psycho, a doctor, two technicians, two fratboys who think they're technicians, their friend who thinks he's a technician, another doctor and a stupid engineer all cooped up together on a nice suicide mission break. _

He'd be composing a nice pub joke right now if he wasn't so nervous. His eyes settled on Zaeed, who responded to the familiar sensation of being watched and gave him an unreadable sidelong look.

Kenneth looked away without a second of hesitation, feigning sudden interest in the violet and indigo-bathed starship drawings on the ceiling.

_Shite,_ _got to stop looking at Zaeed. Don't look at Zaeed! _

The very public light shed on his 'will they or won't they?' friendship with Gabby would likely prompt Zaeed to give him a 'friendly' reminder of what they already talked about. But the shared room, shared bed fiasco on the horizon was only a single worry floating around in his anxious mind. Yes, this booking screw up was daunting, but Kenneth was just as concerned about the unanswerable question Gabby had asked him back in the Engine Room. He was a man of many words; rarely speechless, yet her daring display had rendered him such. What the hell was that about and where had it come from? Gabby had never asked an unanswerable question before, and he knew an unanswerable when he heard one. _'Does my ass look big in this?'_ _'Do you like the waitress' tits?'_ and _'What are you thinking about right now?' _had been asked by women for centuries but never, ever correctly answered. What was she trying to pull?

The elevator doors; cobalt blue and embroidered with a gold and silver mosaic, slid open silently and out they went. They were greeted by a short, thin bellboy whose welcoming expression soured as he beheld the elevator's unusual occupants. Jack was the first to go, never one to enjoy sharing a confined space with Cerberus employees no matter how minor their role in the organisation's endeavours. She cut off a tentative greeting from the bellboy in a profoundly rude manner, shutting him up without much effort.

Trailing close behind Jack and paying the already-addled bellboy no attention was Zaeed. He stared after her with lopsided eyes, still tapping his lower back in morbid expectation of a yet-unfired gunshot. Grunt joined the mercenary's side.

It had really happened, Kenneth thought as the surprising realisation dawned. Grunt was now something of a protégé to Zaeed and following his every whim. This was a turnout nobody who'd witnessed their first meeting could have predicted. The armed standoff and grizzly exchange of words following Grunt's release from the tank and manhandling of Shepard still raged vivid in Kenneth's mind.

Kenneth stepped out with Mordin and Chakwas (still arguing though now in respectful, lowered tones about second-hand smoke) on his left and Joker and Gardener (now trading hopeful musings about asari chiropody) on his right. Gabby seemed to have wedged herself amongst Goldstein, Patel and Matthews. He couldn't see her face as they proceeded down another lavish and well-decorated corridor coloured many shades of blue, but was certain that she was still biting her lip, prolonging the moment when they would have to lock eyes with this new, uncomfortable development hanging between them.

Zaeed marched over to another window. This one was long and diamond-shaped, stained with a slender turquoise star leaving enough plain glass to allow a first-rate look at the always daunting yet always wonderful Ilium landscape with its millions of multi-coloured glows and flashes of light. Ilium's people, viewed through the diamond shape were like a diverse ant colony, scurrying through busy lives without rest against the marvellous backdrop of nature and time-tested technology.

The veteran thudded this window with three more harsh blows of his fist.

"Better. No cracks this time!" he barked, causing several more flinches from the Cerberus crew. The bellboy's alarmed eyes widened further at this unorthodox display of behaviour from this strange-looking man.

"Place might actually be stable enough. But then again," he turned to the vast krogan at his side, "shouldn't let a secure glass shield lower your guard thatmuch."

He gave the window one more aggressive thud and the bellboy winced, red in the face; seemingly outraged at this point yet far too afraid to say anything.

"Remember what I said about my last Ilium visit, a few years back when I was hunting down the last of Ibragimov's people?"

The krogan nodded and Zaeed continued. "I left the shower bollock naked and walked over to the window. Ended up with two rounds in my arse and a 500 credit indecent exposure charge. Goddamn blood was everywhere; spent about a week scrubbing the stuff off. Rubbed myself so raw I almost had to get a circumcision when I was done."

Kenneth chortled with as much volume as he dared as the rest of the crew wandered without any real purpose or intent down a vast passageway of doors, paintings, vases and windows. Jack had long since vanished from sight and was already in a well-isolated room.

"Place may just appear a cushy holiday destination for an inexperienced kid like you,"said Zaeed, eyes narrowing at Grunt, "But I 'spose you'll learn." He shook his head. "Bloody Cerberus missions," he added in a bitter undertone, "never a truly safe moment."

"Uh, e-excuse me?" said the now trembling bellboy. Dark patches of sweat were visible in the armpit area of his ultramarine uniform and his matching silver-embroidered hat was askew. "Did you say Cerberus, sir?"

"No!" snapped Zaeed. He closed the gap between the two of them, forcing the younger man to back against the wall opposite. Kenneth gulped, fearful for both the boy's safety and security of the mission. "I said 'welcome to Westerlund News, this just in: headless bellboy found in ditch.' "

The bellboy nodded and retreated into the elevator without a word.

"Don't worry about him," Zaeed continued as the extravagant doors closed and the terrified little man disappeared from view. "He ain't gonna be saying a word."

The corridor's scattered occupants exchanged nervous glances, eyes snapping from one face to another, with the exception of Gabby, who was still situated outside of Kenneth's vision.

"Anyway," said Zaeed with more colour and less iciness in his voice. His omni-tool was flashing, showing the booking schedule Kelly had just forwarded from downstairs. "Rooms! Kid," he nudged Grunt, "you're at the far end, past the water cooler, utility rooms and sauna, in 5-43."

A wise choice by Shepard; 5-43 was situated as far from the other, more clustered grouping of rooms as possible.

"Jack, Jackie, Jacqueline, Subject Zero, whatever the hell she's calling herself these days, is in 5-35."

This news was met with another shared feeling of relief; 5-35 was a turned corner and eight doors separated from Grunt's dwelling and again, generously far from the remaining SR-2 crew and squad.

"Hang on," Zaeed said, looking up from his arm. "Girl probably didn't hear that. Anybody wanna pass that onto her?" He frowned at the group, making his face appear even more marred and melted.

More silence. No volunteers.

"Fine, I'll do it!" he growled, uneven eyes falling to the omni-tool's display again. "Disappointed in you!" he added to Grunt, who huffed.

"That leaves…" Zaeed continued, growing more bored with this by the second. "Goldstein and Patel, you're going in Room 5-8." He gestured to a nearby door.

Goldstein chuckled. "Just don't put me in 2-17 and I'll do anything you ask," she quipped. This was met with another uncomfortable silence, and it was her turn to go red. "Does nobodyread books anymore?" she hissed through gritted teeth.

"What is this human literature the technician speaks of?" said Grunt to his mentor.

"Joker, 5-3," droned Zaeed, ignoring both Goldstein and Grunt. "Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews, you're in 5-9. Gardener…"

Kenneth zoned out, still not looking at Gabby, who had managed to stay somewhere behind him all this time. Kenneth hoped Shepard had possessed the foresight and good judgement to also give Grunt well-isolated private toilet facilities. He didn't feel like spending another couple of hours tweaking an electronics grid, uniting extranet porno bandwidth and Febreeze plug-ins. This thought quickly turned optimistic.

_Then again…I could do it again to impress Gabby. She was thrilled last time. _

He shook his head and took a deep breath. If ever there was the possibility of anything happening romantically, it would materialise within the next couple of days and he'd simply _have _to see it through to a proper end; no jumping apart, intercom interruptions notwithstanding. An almost-kiss followed by two years of flirting, lying to himself and suffering in silence was fine to pull off once but twice would drive her away forever. Did he really want to impress her in the hope that it would lead to a more than just friends situation? He wasn't sure anyway. There was such an easy safety in casual flirting; an assurance that they could always fall back on an unbreakable friendship.

_Still, redoing the valiant 'I'll save us from the krogan shit smell' routine couldn't hurt, could it? _

Then there was the unanswerable she'd posed earlier, the one that burned an image into his mind still tangled in a web of lust, fear and excitement. Was it a bold move on her part? Or was she just waggling her bum around with him getting illegal benefit? Maybe she simply trusted him with buttock proportional measurements without the fear that he may stiffen like an N7 marine responding to an address by a superior officer.

_Nah, it's not that. It can't be._

He was no longer prepared to deny that there was somethingbetween them. His two years of crippling doubt after the debacle on the Perugia were behind him nowadays as the more 'special moments' between he and Gabby were recently piling up. Gabby had even told Goldstein the story of that arsepit Marlowe's day of defeat in Edmonton, and Gabby rarely told anyone anything about their past friendship. So she really wasn't ashamed of him being around her. Good thing to know when they were literally booked to sleep together.

_No. Mustn't see it that way! Have to pretend I don't like the idea!_

Kasumi and Kelly were sorting out the booking fiasco at this very moment, meaning his opportunity to almost certainly not try to do anything later tonight was gone, and that was good…sort of.

"…and that leaves," said Zaeed, bringing Kenneth's mind back to the land of the living, "Donnelly and Daniels in 5-12, Shepard and Chambers in 5-14." He shook his head, "I feel sorry for _their_ bloody bed."

Zaeed motioned to turn off his omni-tool, only to be interrupted by the harsh beep signifying the arrival of a new private message.

"Oh," he added dispassionately. "You two! Chambers says they won't be able to rebook the room for at least another week so looks like you're stuck together."

Kenneth heart leapt; anticipation, coming in the usual mixture of happiness and dread, filled him.

_YES! I mean SHIT! I mean YES! I mean-_

This train of thought was interrupted by his first sight of Gabby in what felt like hours. She slipped past him without a word and joined Goldstein and Patel who were conversing outside of 5-8 as everyone else went off to their respective rooms, letting out their final dregs of laughter at the reading of Zaeed's private message.

His view of her was short-lived, as Zaeed made a sudden, menacing beeline for him.

"You'd betternot screw this up, Donnelly!" he hissed, weathered face inches from Kenneth's and voice dropped below the capabilities of even Grunt's enhanced hearing. Kenneth's leaping heart raced with an intensity not felt since their first 'romantic chat' a few days ago. He held his tongue, and the older man's gaze. Zaeed's restraint from interfering any further in his struggling love life had been something of a mixed blessing for Kenneth; satisfying his cowardly safety-first approach to keeping Gabby at arm's length but encouraging him to make an effort by himself.

"This is it, kid," Zaeed whispered, still sounding like a man about to enter a shootout with a battalion of batarians. "One of those opportunities I mentioned. Two choices," he raised two fingers, "chicken out again, or make something of it!"

Kenneth sneaked a quick look at the trio of women still talking by 5-8. Gabby had fallen silent and was looking at him with wide-eyed worry.

_Bugger, _he thought, _she probably thinks he's threatening me with another poisoning. Better get away now. _He met Zaeed's eyes again and nodded several times.

"Yeah, yeah," he said with almost convincing sincerity. "I'll err…get right onto it."

Satisfied, the mercenary walked away. Kenneth groaned and ran both hands over his face. He felt exhausted already.

_Surely there must be a faulty engine or struggling power grid around here somewhere? __Anything__to take my mind off that bloody -_

"Zaeed arranging another chinwag over tea?" said a familiar voice. His eyes snapped open. There was Gabby, looking up at him with her full lips forming a shy grin. Nothing seemed to rob Gabby of her sense of humour, even when they clashed. It was one of the many things he adored about her.

"Hmm?" he mumbled, hands now slumped over his mouth. They were now alone in the rich blue corridor. "Oh that? Uh, no he was just reminding me of the last one," he said truthfully. He didn't feel the need to lie to Gabby again. She sensed his discomfort and didn't pursue the subject.

"Mordin asked for my help prepping his room's lighting, he…" she chuckled and rubbed the back of her neck. Was that another tell-tale blush brightening her smooth white cheeks?

"I dunno," she added. "Some salarian sleeping cycle thing I guess. So uh, just go ahead and check out the room and I'll be there in a bit." She smiled. "Seeya!" She walked off.

Kenneth looked with both longing and resentment at rooms 5-1 and 2 – the empty, locked doors nearest to the cobalt elevator. The spaces they would be occupying had everything gone to plan. Before she disappeared from view he indulged in one more, daring glance at the Propulsion Engineer.

_Mighty fine indeed. Finer that the haggis of a Glaswegian butcher._

He headed towards 5-12. When he arrived, the door had a folded note stuck to the centre. He pulled the note off and opened it up.

_**Room reserved for Mr and Mrs Doubtfire. Please knock (loudly) before entering. **_

"_Wankers!" _

Matthews, Hawthorne and Hadley's laughter came with surprising clarity through 5-9's sealed doors.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Mordin's Room**

"There you are Dr. Solus," said Gabby as she flicked the last switch on an uncovered circuit board, revealed by a pulled out armchair.

The salarian's large black eyes twinkled and his leathery face broke into a smile.

"Excellent work Engineer Daniels, surprised to see such high versatility in technical skills, but pleasantly so." He held up his hands before she could react to this comment. "No patronising intent," he added, "merely impressed with your prowess."

"Thanks, and no offence taken," she said. "I spent a lot of time as a kid screwin' around with pretty much everything that had an electrical current. Drove my mum and dad nuts but," she shrugged, "comes in handy for this sort of thing."

Mordin stroked his scaly chin with one hand and nodded, lost in a rush of new inspiration. Gabby could see the gears of his mind turning. A fire was lit behind his eyes.

"Versatility should be expected in human species; unusual genetic and cultural diversity for sapient group. High variance in matters of politics, religion, religious denomination and interpretation, ethnic groups, cuisine – most convincing argument for collector abduction motive; genetic variance allows for most promising biological test results when using humans as control group. Have seen it before during STG missions in DMZ."

"Professor," she said, struggling to keep up, "remember what we discussed? About you using more connectives in your speech?"

Mordin nodded in solemnity and cleared his throat. "Sorry…_I…_will try to use more connectives in…_my_…speech…" He shook his head like an elephant bothered by a troublesome fly. "Ah! Sorry, can't do it!" he yelped, face turning frantic. "Word efficiency goes up 20% when eliminating unnecessary connectives and conjunctives, allows for smoother flow of dialogue, easier to keep track of new ideas and thought processes when forming theories!"

"It's fine Doctor, just a suggestion," she said. "Well if that's everything, I'll see you around, sir." She turned and touched the door switch.

"Actually," said Mordin. "Wanted to discuss something else. Medical matters."

Gabby frowned. Recent days had accustomed her to bizarre twists and turns in her personal life but Mordin Solus never joked about medical matters.

"Aware that mission is dangerous," he said. "Different species..." he paused, choosing his next words with caution in a most uncharacteristic way, "react differently to stress."

Why was this straightforward, fast-talking salarian being so careful?

"What are you-"

"Long-time friendship with Engineer Donnelly makes dalliance attractive as stress-release."

Gabby raised her eyebrows.

_No way! Not you too Mordin?_

Mordin took her appalled silence for permission to continue. "Cerberus less bound by regulations concerning fraternisation but still: recommend caution."

"Doctor I don't know wh-"

"Sexual release tempting in such stressful conditions," Mordin continued, ignoring her despairing face and open mouth. "Engineering a vital part of mission procedure. Would be hazardous if distractions from duty arose. Wholly encourage sexual relationship if feelings are strong, forced abstinence in face of tension never a good idea. Just suggesting you and Engineer Donnelly work out nightly routine of-"

"I don't know what you're talking about," she snapped.

"Oh?" said Mordin, "was almost certain that you and Engineer Donnelly were either involved or considering it. Exchange of information among crew always pointed towards sexual activity. Evidence anecdotal but still-"

"Mordin, there is _no truth _in that!" she barked, hoping nobody else had picked up this exchange.

"Very well, just offering informed suggestion from medical standpoint," said Mordin with another defensive raise of his hands. "Have completed extensive studies of human physiology; understand the effects of self-denial and repressed romantic feelings on long-term health, unpleasant results."

"Thank you Doctor Solus but, I don't think any of this is necessary," said Gabby. Her tone was icy.

"Will respect your wishes, Engineer Daniels," said Mordin, "won't mention it again unless you seek me out."

Gabby nodded stiffly and left the room. She soon found 5-12. Kenneth was waiting for her by the door, red in the face and clutching a balled-up note in a very powerful grip. She nodded at his clenched fist.

"What's that?"

"Nothing," he said, pocketing the paper and using his keycard.

To their shared annoyance, Room 5-12 was the most beautiful they had ever seen.

It was large yet cosy, shaded a delicate periwinkle. Every surface appeared silken and spotlessly clean, shimmering in the low light. The air was sweet-smelling, calming. The bed placed in the far corner was a huge, inviting four poster.

Gabby cleared her throat, which was dry all of a sudden. "So I guess this is…"

"Yeah…" said Kenneth, "our room."

"It's nice," she said with a nod that was more an attempt to calm herself than a response to his comment. "It's…roomy."

"Uh huh," he mumbled, heart in his throat. "Can never go wrong with a room that's…like you said; _roomy_."

What happened to them? Several years of close friendship meant they were surely past the stage of forced small talk by this point. Ever since the Garrus incident their conversation seemed to have taken an awkward and unsure turn; some days they happily basked in their erudite grasp of engineering, fond memories and shared interests and some days they were like shy fifteen year-old prom dates with little to no experience in dealing with the opposite sex.

"Wanna go downstairs and waste time while the luggage people come up?" he said.

"Actually I wanted to spend some time alone for a little while," said Gabby. For some reason, hearing the news from Zaeed's lips only seemed to have worsened it. "Sorry," she added when seeing his unreadable expression.

"It's alright," he said with a shrug. "Talk later?"

She nodded, smiled once more and started back down the corridor, wondering how many of Ilium's gift shops she could browse before someone noticed her.

"Gab!" he called. "I'll see if I can get my hands on a sleeping bag or ask Joker or Gardener if they'll let me bunk with them or something, shouldn't be too hard."

Joker's door opened and he leaned out. "I'm not sharing."

"Neither am I!" Gardener yelled without bothering to open his own door. "Be a man and sleep with the girl!"

"We're not either!" shouted Hawthorne from 5-9.

"I didn't bloody well ask you!" Kenneth countered.

"Leave him alone guys, he's a man in love!" bellowed Goldstein from 5-8.

"Will you all please SHUT UP?"

"Hey Ken!" called Hadley. "I wouldn't want to rob you of a chance to enjoy the _craic!" _

"THAT'S IRISH YOU IDIOT!"

Gabby hurried into the elevator and punched the button marked 'Ground Floor.' This was not an exchange she wanted to witness any more of.

* * *

It was the first trip of the day for Gabby that passed without any notable madness. When reaching the ground floor via the elevator she encountered the now white-faced bellboy who greeted her with a yelp, and was just about to approach the asari receptionists when Bert and the remaining crew arrived, accompanied by their baggage handlers. She hurried back to the elevator without greeting them; not willing to find out how fast word of the booking mix up had travelled.

Serrice Souvenirs on the third floor was a huge disappointment, containing little more than tacky, overpriced mugs, shirts and the smug writings of Matriarch Enralya. She left after only five minutes with no gifts, wondering if she had the time (or enough ability to sneak past the paranoid Zaeed) to take a taxi to Memoirs of Ilium by Liara T'soni's offices. Eventually she headed back to her - _their - _room on the fifth floor, felling dejected and deciding to get the monotonous task of unpacking her things out of the way.

The message alert from her omni-tool was expected. Shepard would be gone until the next day and in his absence Kelly would have to repress her unquenched libido and mount another fruitless team bonding attempt. The crew and squad got along well enough; just without Kelly's incessant pressure. Gabby was also certain that this was a meal Jack still wasn't going to attend.

_**Hey guys,**_

_**Good news! I've booked that Armali-themed restaurant on the first floor for a celebratory dinner later. Put on your best evening wear and come down at sevenish.**_

_**- Kelly x x **_

Gabby found this far less surprising than what was lying in wait for her by the time she got back to Room 5-12.

She entered the lush room and spotted a shiny black and very revealing dress hanging from the now open wardrobe. It was accompanied by a pair of matching, and equally glamorous high heeled shoes. She ran her hand along the dress' surface. It was smooth to the touch. She turned it around and saw a silver, triangular clasp between the shoulder straps over the neck area.

_Wow, it's amazing! Is that real, honest to God, dead cow leather? Must've cost a fortune! But who would- ah._

A note with Kasumi's distinctive, curvaceous scrawl was tucked in a very well-hidden and spacious pocket that Gabby guessed was for concealing sidearms.

_**Hey Gabby, **_

_**When I came aboard the Normandy I thought I'd need this little thing for Hock's party, but that never came about. Now that he's mush and the graybox is back with me there's no use keeping it for myself – (what a happy coincidence this dinner is) Enjoy!**_

_**- Kasumi**_

Gabby felt a simultaneous rush of gratitude and irritation. She knew what Kasumi's motives were. Why did everybody think it was their business all of a sudden? She thought her share of surprises was over for the day. But the impact of Kasumi's gifts on her blood pressure was eclipsed by what lay in an open drawer on the dresser by the window.

_You have __got__to be kidding! What kind of person do they think I am?_

It was a lacy push-up bra, accompanied by another irritating note from Kelly that she didn't even bother to read in detail; the trademark _**'Kelly x x' **_at the bottom told enough. As sexy as it looked, Gabby felt this sort of attire really wasn't…_her. _She'd grown up a tomboy, always eye-deep in tools, spare parts and self-made gadgets, surrounded by three older male cousins who she routinely outshone in all technologically-oriented areas of life.

Still, there was no harm in trying the thing on in private, was there? Before letting herself descend into further endless depths of rationalising, she put on the undergarment, looked down and felt her mouth drop open. The unfamiliar pressure under her chest was a small price to pay; this thing really did its job.

_Oh my God, you could serve drinks on this rack!_

She shook her head and contemplated pulling off the item, dropping it back in the open drawer for now and discreetly returning it to Kelly later. She was more grateful for the dress and shoes, but not enough to motivate her into wearing them for the evening. She visualised the crew's shocked stares and gleeful smiles, Hadley and Hawthorne's leers, Kenneth's wide, wandering eyes and the relentless teasing that would swell in the background whenever the two of them made their pained, hesitant conversation. She felt ashamed. But then again, there would be almost no escaping Kenneth's company for the next fortnight or so, and bedtime would be most painful. Their Ilium stay was going to be full of awkward moments; she might as well have a good time during.

She couldn't exactly tell why she did it. Maybe it was the jewelled Ilium horizon, or maybe it was the gleeful anticipation of working by Kenneth's side on an even more advanced Normandy in the near future. Whatever it was, it prompted her to accept these offerings. For the second time that day, Gabby put cold rationality aside and gave herself over to excitement, hope and a momentary madness. She kept Kelly's gift, pulled on Kasumi's and strutted towards the long mirror on the room's other side, wobbling on the unfamiliar footwear and wondering what Kenneth would make of her newest outfit.


	12. Messages

**[VIEWING: CShepard - Inbox]**

**From:** KellyGrrrl

**To:** CShepard

**Subject:** Our special night **;)**

Shmoopie, I need you to send your signature to the recquisition service for that order of whipped cream for our room (it's been paid for in your name)

Though it won't taste HALF as good as you do...

* * *

**From: **LT'Soni

**To:** CShepard

**Subject:** Garrus's request

Tell Garrus (when he's ready - he didn't seem too stable during our meetings) that I've located Sidonis.

No matter how this ends; I trust your judgement Shepard.

Thank you again for your help with this 'Observer' debacle.

* * *

**From: **MLawson

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Personal matters

Shepard, I need your help and there's no one else to turn to. Meet me in my room later so we can discuss this properly - I don't trust this channel.

* * *

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To:** CShepard

**Subject:** Your inbox

Hey sugar muffin, me again.

So I just noticed you've received messages from Liara and Miranda consecutively. Would you kindly ask them why these weren't run by me first? I'm your yeoman after all.

How is Liara anyway? You've been spending an awful lot of time in her office lately. What do you talk about? Does she know about us?

Can't wait to see you again my little boogelybear.

- Kellykins xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

P.S. *sigh* I wish you'd start using the 'Sheppyboy' username – we'd officially be email lovers!

* * *

**From:** NAHotelCustomerService

**To:** CShepard/LT'Soni

**Subject: **Re: Rebooking proposal

We apologize for the inconvenience sir/madam, but will be unable to rebook Rooms 5-1 and 2 for Mr Donnelly and Ms Daniels due to an unexpected krell spider infestation. Rest assured we have managed to contain the creatures and will be having them exterminated shortly.

* * *

**From:** DrSolus

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Krell spiders

Shepard, have made fascinating discovery of krell analysis. Rare breed; Tuchanka-born. According to local reports were stolen from illegal laboratory on Al'Vahr Street, theft would have taken some skill. However, if the arachnids escaped of own accord, could prove major evolutionary breakthrough on hive-mind physiology. Will continue studies.

* * *

**From:** KasumiG

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Re: Please tell me you didn't

What? Oh come ON!

Mordin mentions a 'thief of some skill' and you leap to THAT conclusion?

* * *

**From:** JacobT

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Dinner

Hey Shepard,

Some of the guys mentioned eating out at this fast food place by Veus Station; you're welcome to join us if you want. I've been there before. Heavy cost, but the fries

* * *

**From:** JacobT

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Sorry

My omni tool glitched.

Heavy cost, but the fries are great and they come in pretty good portions. I think there's an all-you-can eat special on there today.

* * *

**From:** GarrusV

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Liara

Make sure Liara receives that thank you from me for her help obtaining the Thanix schematics. And I'm sure you've heard about Hadley's brother by now, offer him my condolences.

* * *

**From:** theHbomb

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Fucking love you man

I may be drunk but you'll always be beautiful

* * *

**From: **ZMassani

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Bail money

Goddamn kid didn't listen to me. I told him not to enter the high-stakes tournament without proper collateral but he went ahead and did it. Could at least have controlled his bloody temper - he lost a bundle and pulled some guy's arms from his sockets.

Reminds me of the last time I went out for drinks with Anton and Vera before the Blood Pack raid of '68. We'd been debriefed by Mel and Aria - bloody girl doesn't bother with the formalities, eh? - and Vera was doing her usual thing of flapping her lip about Anton's MENSA membership when some drunk off his four-eyed arse batarian comes over and starts with the macho man routine. So Anton smashes a 7Down bottle over the guy's head, and it turns out this batarian's some rich kid working for Rattokk and Gianfranco, out on some birthday do with his gambling buddies. Didn't even need to give Vera the signal; she leaps into the air, pulls a Silaris-issue pistol from between her tits and g-

_**Error: Maximum characters reached.**_

* * *

**From:** LockDown

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Awesomeness

_**Garrus Vakarian once time-travelled to 1860s America...**_

_**He split the Union with a sniper shot.**_

**[MESSAGE MARKED AS SPAM]**

* * *

**From:** JackieNought

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Little help?

Shepard, tell that nosy bitch Anaya to stick that arrest warrant up her purple ass. I don't feel like kicking it again but I will if I have to.

Btw you're gonna have to pay to fix the damage in that place.

* * *

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Re: Re: 'Us Time'

Tootsiepop,

You have time to do a couple of jobs for that stalker and some flirty matriarch but when I arrange a private date all of a sudden you're "too busy?"

* * *

**From:** KasumiG

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **The engineers

Hiya!

So…don't be mad or anything and it's probably nothing, but we kind of lost Gabby and Ken. Might as well come clean now before you find out in any other way.

* * *

**From:** KellyGrrrl

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **I need to know

Honey Pie,

Why did you only take me from behind last time?

It's like you didn't want to look at me

* * *

**From: **KDonnelly

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **The departed

Where does the toetag go on a dead poerson without feet?

* * *

**From:** GDaniels

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Why are the lunatics on the grass?

The air is around me everywhere. I'm in a giant aero, not afraid to care. The bubbles are everywhere! My head's gonna explode, thunder in my ear. What will happen if the band I'm in start's playing different tunes?

* * *

**From:** KDonnelly

**To:** CShepard

**Subject: **Trust

I trust you man.

I need to know.

Don't lie to me man.

Just tell me, honestly,

Am I on fire right now?

* * *

**From:** JJokerMureau

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Re: WTF?

Commander, you may be getting some really weird messages and hearing some things right now. Rest assured: THOSE ARE NOT MY DRUGS.

* * *

**From:** KasumiG

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Phew!

You are not gonna BELIEVE what happened with Gabby and Ken just now. We caught them-

_**Error: Could not receive the rest of this message**_


	13. Dinner

**One hundred reviews, thanks everybody.**

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall**

**One day previously…**

"You're absolutely _sure _it's been contained?" inquired an anxious Kelly Chambers, wondering if she'd have to resort to her 'my boyfriend is a Spectre' routine. Kasumi was by one of the archways, examining the oldest Thessian statue and twirling a stolen keycard in her long fingers. She was hanging onto every word.

"Yes ma'am," said the concierge, accompanied by four additional asari staff who themselves gave tentative nods. "Every room is fitted with a containment field in the event of an emergency. The exterminators will arrive first thing tomorrow, though the fifth floor will be unavailable for a few hours during and after their work."

This appeased her, and Kelly dismissed the asari. She then saw that Kasumi had joined her side, but was far too used to this to jump in surprise.

"I need a translator for you sometimes," said Kelly, dropping her warm voice to a cold whisper. _"That's _what you meant by 'getting some fresh air?' Stealing a Class-A untradeable species from Eclipse and planting it in our living space?"

Kasumi remained unabashed; she wasn't going to start feeling remorse over stealing at this point in her life.

"Our living space?" she said "While we're quoting me, didn't I also say you'd thank me for this later? I hacked Shep's omni-tool earlier…"

Kelly's eyebrows shot up and she folded her arms.

"Oh don't pretend you don't do it all the time!" Kasumi added with exasperation. "How else did you find out he'd been PM'd by Miranda and Liara consecutively?" Kelly's displeased face flushed, but her posture stayed the same.

"All you need to know," continued Kasumi, "is that Shep and Liara were pretty damn close to rebooking that room, so I decided to take a…necessary precaution. And we're only reallyin trouble if Mordin captures and studies one of the things then blabs to Romeo."

Her half-concealed face creased at this unsettling thought. "Which, come to think of it…he might." She tried to shrug this off, but couldn't quite do it. This was a pretty likely outcome. "Ah well," she smiled and squeezed Kelly's shoulder. "It'll be my ass in hot water if that happens."

Kelly tried and failed to figure out what was worse: Kasumi's continual, suspicious desire to help or the fact that Gabby and Ken were now somehow bold enough to question news that had come from Zaeed's scarred lips yet still too timid to leave the respective romantic comfort zones keeping them apart. And then there was the shudder-inducing thought of hundreds of bright red arachnids scuttling around five floors above her head, breeding and spreading if the containment field failed. She decided to deal with the most accessible of her nagging doubts first.

"You still haven't told me why you're being so helpful?"

Kasumi's patronising smirk resurfaced at this question. "Because I'm trying to prove a point," she said. "Those two spend all day stood together in the Engine Room and all night chatting through a thin wall. They're accustomed to ignoring and suppressing sexual tension."

"We'll see," said Kelly with rather tired sigh, heading towards one of the many golden archways. Kasumi went off in the opposite direction. "I'm off to get changed for tonight, and I'm not the only one," Kelly added.

This clashed perfectly with Kasumi's own utterance of "and you're not the only one."

The two women froze, then turned to face one another with astonishing speed, like two duelling gunslingers in the Old West.

"Who are you referring to?" said Kelly, now narrow-eyed. She was familiar enough with the thief well enough to know that Kasumi never spoke of herself in such a way.

"Me?" said Kasumi, "who are _you _referring to? We both know your uh…what was the name? 'Schmoopie' isn't going to be joining us tonight."

Kelly grinned. "Let's just say I left the baggage handlers more than just a generous tip."

"Oh," said Kasumi, resuming her silent walk to the exit. "Nice to know great minds think alike."

Seven o'clock at Armali Palace was going to be most interesting.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor**

_How Miranda actually __fights__wearing these things, I will never know, _thought Gabby as she wobbled, jerked and stumbled her way through a deserted corridor on the fifth floor, ears attuned to the sound of approaching footsteps.

In the far-too-limited remaining time between discovering Kelly and Kasumi's little surprises and the scheduled start of dinner, Gabby had given more than the usual amount of attention to the tidying of her hair and then applied an economical but still noticeable layer of makeup to complement her outfit and chest amplification, thanks to a small makeup kit that had gone unused for longer than she cared to think about.

As big as room 5-13 was, it just fell short of providing the required space to practice her walk, and Gabby didn't want the others to think she was collapsing every few seconds, so she slipped out when the coast was clear, not stopping until she was far from any sight or sound indicating habitation.

After failing to last more than a few steps yet again, she slumped against a locked utility room door, feeling defeated and not sure if she should be disappointed by the thought of losing this romantic 'secret weapon' or relieved by the fact that sticking to regular clothing would keep her in that cosy comfort zone.

But before she could descend into the final stage (self-pity) what she called her 'feelings for Kenneth cycle' – the horrible, unmistakeable sound of approaching footsteps came.

Gabby practically flew upwards to her feet and made the automatic keycard motion at the utility room's door, only to realise a split second later that she possessed no such keycard.

_Shit!_

Her eyes shot from door-to-door. All were inaccessible, taunting her with their red glowing locks and sealed panels. She couldn't take off the shoes and run; she'd already done that when fleeing from her room to this deserted spot. The high heels were beautiful but still too small for her feet. Squeezing into them a third time in one day wasn't going to do any favours for a woman who spent most working days standing up, surrounded by a billion credits of pioneering machinery in a room that was a lynchpin between a krogan, mercenary and escaped convict. Desperation gripped her, and she turned her attention to the nearest laundry trolley, several doors down.

_I could hide behind it if I dived far enough. Can I make it?_

No, it was no small feat with her large feet. The footsteps grew loud; their sound rang off the blue walls with a maddening intensity matching the pounding of her heart. She was almost out of time.

_Shit shit SHIT! I'll just say I was drugged, redressed and dragged off by a really weird fashion designer/serial killer who dolls up his victims before killing them…but he heard the footsteps and ran off before finishing the job. Sounds plausible enough on this planet. _

She groaned, letting her head fall into her hands.

_No, better not. Kenneth will have Shepard blow the place up. _

She stood, took a deep breath and tried her best to turn on her raised heels and face the approaching person with dignity, only to overbalance and fall forwards again.

"You're going to be hearing this a lot tonight, so get used to it," said Goldstein, looking down at her with adoration. "You look fantastic, Gabby."

Gabby's face fell back down. "Provided I can find a way to go through this whole evening standing perfectly still," she moaned into the blue floor.

With a laugh and disbelieving shake of her head, Goldstein pulled Gabby up by the hand and straightened the ruffled leather.

"First time on heels?" she asked.

Gabby just nodded without a word, sick and tired of feeling the rush of blood fill her cheeks.

"Here," said Goldstein, standing beside her, hands on her hips. "Try doing it this way…"

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fourth Floor**

The fourth floor of Nos Astra Hotel was the only one devoid of private living spaces. Despite humanity's strong and ever-growing influence in the galactic community, superstition concerning the number thirteen had yet to hit Ilium's hotel chains.

There was no outer wall on this floor, just a huge, thick window that curved around the building. It was like crystal, capturing Ilium's many vivid colours and lights. This made it a hot spot for professional photographers and camera-happy tourists. Gabby spotted at least six of them between the elevator doors and far corner, clicking away with omni-tools and releasing awed gasps. She crept past them, well…it wasn't exactly creeping to her ears, or anyone else that would have cared. The clunks of her high heels just rang with less consistency that a conventional walk would have produced, and she was glad to see they were far too enamoured with the scenery to turn and see her shaky movements and revealing attire. The exposure of her shapely legs and cleavage were for the benefit of one pair of eyes only.

As she passed the attractions offered on the fourth floor (her gait was now improving, though rough around the edges) Gabby once again felt dwarfed by the extravagance of this wondrous planet. It was as if she had left the confines of the hotel and wandered into the heart of Veus, Al'Vahr, Laiken or one of the many other famed marketplaces. She went by massage parlours, gymnasiums, clothing stores, e-book stores, countless outlets devoted to asari cosmetics – from scalp and tentacle bleaching to back tattoo enhancements. Beyond the asari specialists was the volus district, mostly consisting of enviro-suit adjustment and frame stores ('Hang up your clan's family tree in style!'). After passing the two massive entrance doors of Visions of the Galaxy – Nos Astra's finest interstellar cinema, she reached the section bearing the overhead sign marked 'Cuisine.'

Every species was represented here. She went by Palaven Pies, a dirty krogan steakhouse called Slice O'Nathak ('CAN **YOU **HANDLE THE MEAT?'), Serrice Exquisite, From the Waters of Kahje, Starbucks, Enkindled Eating, Vol-Clan Coffee, Feros: Fried and Frozen, Matriarch-Made, Lorik's Are You Qui'in? and finally, near the corridor's end; Armali Palace.

Before approaching the doors of Palace, Gabby couldn't help but wonder where the quarian-friendly eateries were. She went beyond her arranged destination and leaned around the corner.

Her question was answered almost straight away. It was a half-expected answer but still an unpleasant one. In a cramped, unused alcove, far from the other restaurants, bars and coffee houses, stood a battered stall on wheels attended by a single salarian who frowned at her and tapped a sign reading 'Nutrient paste tubes. Two flavours – six credits each.'

_I guess quarians don't have it easy anywhere, _she thought sadly.

Even Ilium's open and common use of quarian indentured servants, coupled with its Terminus Systems border did little to lessen anti-quarian sentiment. She ceased her leaning, stepped around the corner with a renewed sense of boldness and examined the dilapidated cart, irking the salarian further. If Tali were here she'd be giving a lecture not only on the shabby treatment and representation of her people, but the tube stall's structural and functional inefficiencies – how the wheels needed to be larger and spaced out further for greater balance, how Serrice steel outlasted most conventional metals and can often be acquired at a reasonable price, how easy it is to install a small electronics grid simultaneously powering a grill and some pretty lights to attract more customers. In fact, while installing an ERL-X grid (standard or premium, and what battery would be best suited? She couldn't tell; power was more Ken's thing) why not replace the wheels with a dual H9 propulsion jet to allow easier mobility between floors, or anywhere else for that matter? It would require licensing and maintenance, but that was a small price to pay. And after installation of that particular appliance, you could always –

She stopped, shaking her head and seeing the salarian's expression, now more confused and scared than irritable. Gabby's thinking about Tali giving a lecture on mechanics had resulted in doing it herself.

_Guess she's rubbing off on me sooner than I thought she would. _

She chuckled and went back to Armali Palace.

Unlike the other places on the fourth floor, Armali Palace was fitted with obsolete hinged doors rather than the more reliable and almost universally-adopted keycard and panel system. But nobody was complaining.

True to its nature as a piece of asari architecture, Armali Palace's design mirrored the sensuality and effortless charm of its creators. The doors were tall, slender, curved constructs of stained glass, bordered by a glistening pattern of violet diamonds. Embedded in centre of the left door, sculpted from sapphire was the most beautiful, idealised asari Gabby had ever seen. Her opal-fashioned eyes were wide and powerful, with jade irises and two onyxes forming her pupils. Her smile was gentle, reassuring. The amethyst gown covering her buxom form twinkled in a thousand places like waves of an ocean struck by sudden rays of sunlight, and her jewelled hands were held up in an inviting gesture, almost an embrace.

On the right door, patterned in many shades of blue, green and purple were the words:

_And the Goddess spoke again.  
'My beloved children,  
Do not slip away into the Void with regret heavy on your hearts  
But love as I have loved you._

_Before your end, when you embrace Eternity_  
_Know that you have embraced others_  
_So rejoice, drink wine, break bread_  
_Laugh and love_  
_Celebrate together, united_  
_As I am with you  
Always.'_

The shimmering Goddess and her Word changed; darkened, _deepened_. A red-gold hue crept over Her delicate form, Her Word became bathed in shadow. Gabby turned to the wide window.

The sun was setting on Ilium. Its permanent neon lights glowed stronger in the descending dark, achieving their desired effect by bringing the tantalising promise of mischief, fame, fortune and romance. On the horizon, beyond blackening spires and restless specks of car lights, the sun's orange beams raged a final time through dark cloud in a wash of valedictory beauty. And then it was gone, and Ilium was left to the mercy of its distinctive night life. A whole new world seemed to burst into existence, bringing vibrancy into the darkness. What a beautiful world. What a wonderful place to share with Kenneth at the peak of their careers. Gabby turned back to the door and took another calming deep breath. She then looked down and let it out again. Her breasts were thrust out far enough already. She touched the handle beneath the Goddess' jewel-incrusted fingers, pulled the door open and went inside, mustering her trusty smile.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fourth Floor, Armali Palace**

The restaurant's interior was almost blinding. Gabby grimaced and screwed her eyes shut in an undignified and surely unattractive way, wobbling on the shoes again, but this time able to regain her composure without much effort. Goldstein's brief but insightful lesson was already working its magic.

_I should send her flowers._

Gabby dropped the forced smile. There wasn't a soul in sight. Armali Palace was the largest restaurant on this floor. This particular room was smooth and corner-less, devoid of any dirt or darkness. Gabby's blinking reflection looked up at her from an emerald-coloured marble floor. The walls were made of the same material, leavened by asari mosaic; splashes of deep blue forming patterns of water that swirled in every direction. Nooks were cut into the walls, containing many rare, exotic plants in crystal vases. Before her, in several neat rows were tables and chairs all fashioned in what appeared to be blue glass. They looked thin and floaty; priceless artefacts too fragile to even touch, but were able to withstand the weight of everyone from salarian to krogan. How did the asari do it? On the wall by the longest table was a vivid painting of Kanera the Justicar.

Gabby's eyes began to adjust to the glare of all the polished surfaces, but there was still something she couldn't quite put her finger on. The wave mosaic was almost too real, there was something mesmerising about the way it shone. Bubbles of light swelled and burst on the emerald and ultramarine floor, the glass tables and chairs seemed to have a gentle, rhythmic sway. Then she looked up and realised why.

High, high above her head, stretching up the emerald walls, beyond blooming plants and splashes of blue was no ceiling, but an aquarium. A sheet of glass held in a great pool of water, scythed by the movement of hundreds of fish all shapes, sizes and colours; all beautiful in their unique way. She spotted Ilium's native Skald and Pejek paddle fish, the Thessian sunfish, Palaven's arrach fish with its jagged, plated body, yellow mollofish of the Volus homeworld and Earth's very own clownfish.

Bracing her stance one more time, Gabby walked through the sea of blue glass and blossoming plants. She was still alone. There wasn't an asari or crew member in sight, and for that she was grateful. She felt so much better knowing they would discover her, one-by-one. It was preferable to entering a room full of them – bombarding her with smirks, wolf-whistles and gasps. For the second time that day, Gabby imagined Kelly and Kasumi's grins, Hawthorne and Hadley's jaws hitting the green marble floor and Kenneth's polite, wordless bewilderment. She chuckled to herself again. There was nothing wrong with _that _particular image. At the very worst she would attract the attention of somebody outside of their troupe. A man or woman making a pass at her with perhaps a little too much alcohol sloshing around inside them would mean a very ugly, attention-attracting incident Kenneth. A charismatic turian doing the same would be the sky falling on their heads.

Upon reaching the end of the blue glass ensemble she noticed one of the larger nooks in the wall opened at a blue carpeted passageway which led to the Palace's more laid back other half – drinking and dancing. On the room's opposite end the floor seemed to rise and curl upwards into a long, wall-to-wall counter enshrouding a transparent shelf which boasted a hefty collection of drinks from around the galaxy. In the corner nearest to where Gabby stood was a disorganised assortment of comfy chairs and drinks tables and beyond the bar was a silver-tiled dance floor. There were no plants on these walls, but more paintings; these created by Matriarch Arla. All of them depicted great asari from history. Gabby saw justicars in flowing red robes, wielding swords and biotoc fields in the Thessian Iron Age, Commandos vanquishing krogan during the Rebellions or dying valiantly at hand of the hated rachni. All appeared to be set against milieus of starry nights, stormy seas and rising suns. The burning of Shiagur's Fortress and Siege of Korvann were the largest and most dramatic works on display. Gabby wondered what Grunt would make of them – hopefully not ash or tatters.

At the end of the bar she saw Kasumi with Kelly and her heart gave a nervous jolt. There were worse people to greet her, but the quiet contentment of solitude she had been feeling suddenly ended. Right on cue the music began; an ethereal Thessian hymn. It was slow, soothing and close-harmonied, played on what sounded like acoustic guitars and pan flutes to Gabby's Earthborn ears, though this was most untrue. A high-pitched voice warbled sweet words of faith in the Goddess, of the unbreakable pantheistic union of sapient life, of how love conquered all.

Gabby stopped again. There was no turning back now. She was more prettied up than she had ever been in her entire life, surrounded by gleaming, flawless decoration, ethereal music and preparing to meet the man she cared about more than anyone else. What were they going to talk about? Tonight there would be no immunity to the effects of their heavenly surroundings and that was good…right?

As she moved closer, Gabby could see that Kelly and Kasumi were exchanging excited chatter and sipping lavender-coloured wine from tall, ornate glasses. Kelly was the first to spot her and the inevitable compliments began.

"Oh Gabby you look wonderful!"Kelly exclaimed, clasping her hands beneath her chin and widening her brown eyes which were shining, almost brimming with tears. She looked and sounded like an over-excited mother watcher her daughter descend the stairs on prom night; a manner which annoyed Gabby and Kasumi to no end.

"She's right Gab," said Kasumi. "You're gorgeous_._ You should wear this sort of thing more often."

Gabby was almost too taken aback by the outfits of the women before her to register their words. They may have made a special effort dressing _her _for the evening, but that hadn't thwarted any effort gone into making themselves more glamorous.

Kelly's short red hair was sleek and shiny, tied behind her head in a bun held together by a diamond-encrusted hairpin in the shape of a lotus flower. She wore a long crimson dress matching the new shade of her lips. Around her wrist was a silver bracelet and her neck bore an iridescent silver chain necklace with an aquamarine centrepiece; a gift from Shepard.

As lovely as Kelly was, Kasumi had stolen the show; concealing her face but appearing graceful and stunning at the same time. Gabby and Kelly's curiosity over how the thief had altered her appearance for Donovan Hock's final party was sated at last.

Kasumi wore a satin, figure-hugging dress of her trademark black, embroidered with silver thread forming the pattern of a Japanese dragon that wrapped around her and gleamed under the lights. She wore no necklace; instead the dress had a satin choker which seemed to lengthen her already long, graceful neck. Two smaller sliver thread dragons entwined around each other adorned the choker. Her ample cleavage was visible through an oval cut in the black material and the hood pulled over the top of her head blended seamlessly with the dress. The silver thread pattern woven into it, surrounding Kasumi's bright eyes was a thin, elaborate streak of flame and the flicker of paint over her soft lips was now charcoal black with an inner stroke of more silver. A long luscious plait of black hair protruded from beneath the hood and was draped over her slender right shoulder, on its end was another dragon; a platinum ornament which like Kelly's hairpin was covered with many small diamonds. It had been a gift from Keiji just before his last heist.

Both Kelly and Kasumi may have been more relaxed and accustomed to such events and items of clothing, but even they were showing less leg and bust than Gabby, who began to feel even more self-conscious than ever at this uncomfortable revelation.

"I just feel kinda strange," Gabby admitted. "Thanks though," she added quietly, looking both women in the eye.

"You're welcome," said Kasumi. She produced a third glass apparently from thin air. "Little trick I learned at Hock's place," she whispered as she handed the drink to Gabby. "I know, I'm not a perfect thief, try not to feel so shocked."

Gabby took it, grateful. The bartender; an asari maiden with a bright, friendly face and white makeup, emerged from the stockroom and engaged Kelly in conversation.

Gabby sipped the drink. It was sweet and strong with a rich, fruity taste. "What is this stuff?" she said.

Kasumi shrugged. "Some pretentious, overpriced 'made from the grape that floweth from the Divine Shopping Bag of the Goddess,' I dunno, I wasn't paying attention.

Gabby laughed, she expected as much from an asari serving in Ilium's high-roller district.

"Bartender here's a real history buff. Only a maiden but you know how excitable they can get." Kasumi's twinkling eyes flicked to the girl in question, then back to Gabby and she lowered her voice. "It's actually been a real pain. _Everything _in here's got a story. And you should hear her theories on the prothean extinction! I keep imagining her and Liara T'Soni debating, with the Fratboys losing it in the background."

Kelly excused herself from the bartender's company and hurried over. "What are we talking about?" she said with a rare, fake smile.

"We're talking about Liara, Kelly," said Kasumi, expertly mirroring Kelly's facial expression. "You know that asari scientist that aided Shep two years ago? The charming, sweet maiden who has every right to meet her old friend and who we have every right to talk about in front of you? That's the one."

Kelly drew up to her full height. "Fine," she said.

Kasumi's patience over Kelly's obsession to discover some kind of Shepard-stealing conspiracy was wearing thin.

"So…" said Gabby, trying to think of a new subject, "what are your plans for all that poker money Kasumi?"

This only agitated Kelly and Kasumi further. They exchanged a long, calculating look.

"Something worthwhile," said Kasumi after a tense pause.

"Provided you get the opportunity to spend it," said Kelly with a smirk on her face. "Who knows? It could be here today, gone tomorrow. Maybe even later tonight."

Kasumi broke eye contact with Gabby, but made no movement to face the other woman. "_Pre-tty _sure it's going to stay with me Kelly," she said.

Gabby looked from one woman to the other. She hadn't meant to make the situation more awkward.

_What the hell is this about? _

Zaeed and Grunt emerged from the hallway and Gabby was almost relieved. Tensions were already high enough, and she and Kelly were the only people in the room with no fighting skills.

Zaeed was now wearing a cream and heliotrope Guili Vorn shirt with gold buttons and matching trousers. The suit had an undeniable air of class and dignity, right up until you got to the man's scarred face. To everyone in the room familiar with Zaeed and his work, he just looked like more sophisticated killer. Kasumi grimaced when spotting him. She was reminded of Hock's party.

"Yep," he said, spotting her displeased look and mistaking it for curiosity. "Took this from the body of Antoine Gianfranco himself, shot him down in his Bekenstein mansion about a decade ago. Cost half the bounty for actually killing him to get the thing fixed and cleaned, but I'm glad I did."

Grunt was clad in the same kind of suit often worn by Ilium's krogan; bottle-green with a black and white checked pattern on the cuffs, neckline and over his hump. It was almost twice the size of a regular krogan suit.

"So Zaeed, it's nice to see you've given the shield generator a little break," said Kasumi, gesturing to his lower back. "It wasn't doing great things for your figure."

"I didn't," Zaeed growled. He slapped his stomach and the flicker of blue light shrouded him again. "Just found a smaller one." He then jerked his head towards Grunt. "Gotta wear it when your only backup is a kid who can't even win one round of Pass the Bomb."

Grunt gave Zaeed his usual threatening glare but didn't respond. Zaeed approached the bar. "Gimme a pint of Stella."

"What's that?" said the bartender without taking her eyes off the huge krogan.

Zaeed sighed. "Gotta be sodding kidding me," he muttered. "Beck's? Strongbow? Guinness? John Smith? Foster's? Bombardier? Boddington's?"

She shook her head.

"Fine, just make it a Dark Matter."

"Um, how do you make that?" she said, now very nervous.

"The hell should I know?"

"Kelly?" said Kasumi, watching the scene unfold and pulling the young woman to one side by the arm. "Do we have enough bribe money in the fund Shep left to avoid an incident here?"

Kelly checked her omni-tool. "Provided we refrain from blowing up three restaurants on this floor, or tarnishing one painting in this one, we'll be fine."

"Daniels," said Zaeed, now clutching a Heineken. Everybody stopped what they were doing and saying to watch, as none of them had heard Zaeed compliment a woman before. What would it sound like? Was he even capable? Gabby waited with wide eyes.

"What?"

"I hope you kept the sidearm that came with that thing," he said, much to their disappointment. It seemed Zaeed only complimented Jessie these days. "I wouldn't want it to fall into the wrong hands."

Goldstein then entered, wearing a green and blue floral dress. Behind her was Patel, looking radiant in white and Rolston, in white with silver trim. His outfit was similar to Zaeed's though of less monetary value, and probably not taken from a dead crime lord.

Patel and Rolston had been informed of Gabby's bold choice of evening wear by Goldstein beforehand, and wished her no more embarrassment by making it the centre of attention. They only offered encouraging gestures. Gabby gave a thankful smile in return, still wondering where Kenneth was and after all this time still torn between wishing he would hurry up and wanting him to never see her like this.

The three newest patrons ordered their drinks and joined Kelly in listening to one of Kasumi's thrilling tales while Grunt and Zaeed sat in the corner (Grunt on three and a half chairs) discussing the history of trial by combat among their species. She stood by herself, still eyeing the entrance.

_I guess I'll need some 'confidence.' _

She drained half her glass in one breath but felt no rush; no dizziness or desire to sing loudly while dancing on a table and removing her dress.

Kelly caught her eye. _'Non-alcoholic,' _the yeoman mouthed. Gabby groaned.

The group was joined by Joker and Gardener next. The Normandy's chef and custodian had put on a dated brown suit, made uglier by its close proximity to Joker, who shocked everyone in the bar by putting on showing up in his old ceremonial Alliance vestment; looking smarter than they had ever seen him.

"_Wow!" _said the awed bartender. "Are you an Alliance helmsman?"

"Only a war hero of the finest ship ever built," said Joker.

He attempted to approach the bar with a smooth strut, only to be let down by his fragile legs. When finally reaching the smitten asari, he leaned forward and stroked the extensive collection of medals pinned to his chest.

"And who might you be?"

Gabby could hardly stand the pressure any more.

"How're you then Gabby?" said Rupert Gardner, joining her side with a glass of scotch.

She shrugged. They didn't talk often, but it was hard for anybody to hold anything against the man who cooked the meals and cleaned up after them every day. Rupert was sometimes abrasive and always willing to speak his mind, but Gabby never found anything to hold against him.

"It's kind of a weird change of pace," she said. "I don't think any of us are suited to this kind of life."

"I know what you mean," he said, taking a sip of his scotch. "I'm- oh God that's foul!" he cried. "I miss my kitchen already, and having someone around to bark orders at me. Not that it happened that often, but still."

"Relax Rupert. If any of the waitresses ask, I'll tell them your calamari gumbo's better. Though it might help to not to mention the whole 'cannibalism' thing in front of them."

He chuckled. "Done."

With a storm of laughter and flamboyance came the Fratboys and their friend Matthews, attired in plain blue jeans and their 'Milwaukee Tech Academy, Class of '82' shirts as a joke.

"So then the husband says 'I was talking to the duck!' " Hawthorne choked.

The three of them fell about laughing, prompting the bartender to look up from her whispered, almost nose-to-nose conversation with Joker to scowl at them. Dress formality was a well-regarded aspect of all asari cultures and she saw no merit in its mockery.

"Gimme a Bud, sweetie!" called Hadley. The other two didn't order. They were too busy staring at Gabby, who stood her ground.

"It's finally happened!" Hawthorne gasped. "Gabby's been exposed to so much eezo she's mutated!"

"What?" said a Scottish-accented voice from the hallway. Kenneth entered the room at long last. "I highly doubt thaaaaaa…" he spotted Gabby, "oh I see."

And Gabby thought _she _was going to be the only provocative dresser that day. Kenneth was wearing a black suit jacket and pants with a cream turtleneck sweater: exactly the same outfit he had worn at their graduation party on their last night at the Edmonton Campus; the night she carried him back to his dorm while everybody drunkenly else sang '_Soulshine,' _tucked him in bed and kissed him for the first and only time.

She felt afraid. Were memories all they had?

Kenneth looked around at the others with a red face. "Everybody…got a drink?" he said.

Matthews broke the silence. "Yeah, better get Ken a drink," he said. "Couple of jugs should do the trick."

"Make it a Slippery Nipple!" Hadley added, nudging the Scotsman.

Hadley was next to offer a suggestion. "How about a-"

"Scotch whiskey thanks," said Kenneth, glaring. The asari complied.

Everyone spectating was too amused by these suggestions to even notice any stereotypical significance in the drink Kenneth ordered.

After a few more tense moments in silence, the buzz of scattered conversation resumed. Gabby pulled Kenneth by the arm to a spot where they could speak out of earshot without appearing too far apart from the rest of the group.

Kenneth sipped his drink and stared at her, expecting his friend to start whatever pained conversation they were going to spend the next few hours stumbling through; stealing glances and stuttering; all the while having to endure the feeling of being watched and listened to.

She tugged at his turtleneck. "Tech Academy clothes, huh?" she said, "still fits."

He winked. "Good, that makes one of us."

She gave him the usual soft punch in the arm. His silence in the Engine Room earlier had told her enough. "Just try not to puke all over that thing this time," she said.

Kenneth's face creased into that look of artificial anger masking hilarity that she had grown so attached to.

"I promise no such thing!" he huffed.

"Don't think I'll take you to bed this time if you do!"

His nervous blink made her regret her choice of words. "I mean _carry _you…to."

"I know."

Well, that was one awkward eventuality out of the way; the time had come to tackle the next and enjoy her evening.

She touched her dress lightly. "What do you think?" she asked.

He blurted something out. Something she couldn't hear over an unexpected clink of glasses coming from the bar. But his readable lips were clear enough. Could it be true?

_Beautiful? _

Gabby almost dared to believe it, but had to hear it from him first.

"What?" she said, "sorry I missed that."

"I said you look dutiful," he blurted again.

"_Huh?"_

"Y'know…dutiful. Like you're ready to…to start up an engine or fix a propulsion system or, y'know? _Dutiful." _

She looked crestfallen. Was that all he had to offer his best friend after all these years? Mounting a desperate attempt to tweak his mechanical mind towards the conventions of women and rational beings, he tried to salvage the situation.

"Dedicated," he added with a series of nods that gave him the look of a man being violated by a tazer. "Dedicated and…professional. You're…obviously ready to unwind but…" he tried a nonchalant gesture that went far too near her breasts…"you've left none of your engineering charm behind!"

This terrified ramble came to an end with a maniacal laugh and smile.

_I think I covered my tracks there, she won't suspect a thing._

Gabby just gawked with one eyebrow arched.

…_and I've lied to her again. Nice work Mr Gobshite! _

"Well," she purred, "it's nice to know we Normandy girls can look professional with this much skin showing."

"Aye," he replied, glad she had picked up the ball so well. "You should see the nude calendar Grunt and Zaeed are organising for us guys to do."

They broke out in giggles and moved closer.

"_Boys of the Normandy!" _Gabby said with glee. "You could do November: the only month Scotland has!"

Kenneth grinned. Global warming had come yet Scotland was still written off by many as a soaking shithole.

"We could put _you _in the ship's gym under January," he threw back at her. "The only month Americans use them!"

They laughed again. Kenneth moved closer. "Did you _see _that quarian food stall outside?" he hissed. "Drove me up the bloody wall!"

"I know, right?"

Awkwardness forgotten, they spent a few happy minutes swapping theories on how Ilium's subpar quarian food services could be improved, all the while admiring one another's abilities.

With the entrance of Mordin and Doctor Chakwas, the arrivals were complete. The two walked in a way that was fuelled by their on-going debate; stiff and swift without taking their eyes off each other or offering any greetings. Like her Alliance fellow Joker, Doctor Chakwas donned ceremonial clothing of stately blue. Her companion and current opponent was wearing what looked like a tunic on his long body; black and trimmed with gold.

"And I refer to my original point Doctor," said Chakwas scathingly. "The preliminary results of Professor Garen's tests have been proven meaningless by all subsequent investigations. Conditions were disorganised at best, and she did _very _little to account for the difficulties that would arise from poor study of human physiology, hence all the 'inexplicable anomalies' she kept talking about."

Mordin shook his head. "Testing conditions at University of Sur'Kesh perfectly viable, can say so from experience as well as personal correspondence with Professor Garen."

Kelly broke up this argument with a surge of determined optimism. "You look very nice Mordin," she chirped over Chakwas' response.

"Thank you Miss Chambers," Mordin said with a humble tilt of his single-horned head. "Melonthian silk, was a gift from Ledra Clan leaders following special missions in Krogan Demilitarised Zone."

"Lookin' sharp Doc," Kasumi put in, raising her glass. "Docs," she added, not wanting the already cranky Chakwas to worsen should any of them need her expertise before the evening was through – a possibility that was then almost realised as Grunt showed his distaste for what he had just heard.

The last dregs of Kasumi's wine flew up into the air, splashing on the floor among shattering glass. Grunt had bumped her, and was storming towards Mordin.

"And just what were STG doing?" he demanded in a voice far too low and calm for comfort. A tempest was brewing behind those brilliant blue eyes. He neared the Blood Rage. "Well?" he pressed, jabbing a thick finger into the doctor's chest."

Mordin's expression soured but he didn't back down. Zaeed hurried forwards as more asari – these ones in fluttering sea green robes with faces decorated by white paint – emerged from behind the bar. It didn't take an expert to see that this sudden influx of oddballs would require plenty of capable hands.

"Hey come on!" Zaeed snapped, wedging himself between the two and pressing his scarred forehead against Grunt's undeveloped plates. "What did I goddamn tell you about wasted aggression? Save it for the Collectors, Eclipse, Blood Pack or whatever the fuck!" Zaeed's eyes were narrowed, his voice was venomous.

Grunt relented, and left the most fearful silence yet.

From their own secluded spot, Gabby and Ken realised their hands were locked together in a tight grip. Gabby withdrew as if touching fire, Kenneth slipped his guilty hand into his pocket and they both took a step apart.

With the tension dissipating and completion of their group for the night (nobody was relying on Jack showing up) the asari waitresses lined up before them and gave low, graceful bows, moving together and gaining the undivided attention of the Fratboys and Matthews, who always appreciated bowing from beautiful creatures in low-cut dresses.

"Welcome to Armali Palace," stated the tallest asari in the middle. "Nos Astra's finest restaurant and the finest demonstration of Thessian culture outside of visiting the great planet itself. Before we serve you tonight, please sit back and enjoy one of our oldest and most prestigious customs: a demonstration of native Thessian dance."

The music filling their half of Armali Palace changed, becoming even slower, calmer, taking a new form that was almost surreal. It was a many-layered symphony of instrumentation the likes of which none of the crew – even the well-travelled Zaeed Massani – had ever heard before. No voice, asari or otherwise could be heard singing a single note. This song had a seamless, uncatchable flow, sounding as natural to its listeners as a wind-ruffled sea; as sweet as the first song of a bird in its fleeting life. They felt as if the Goddess Herself was soothing them with a lullaby. Even the perfume sweetening Armali Palace's air was intensified by this song's esoteric power.

Then in a swish of sea green, bright eyes and white face paint, the line of asari parted. They moved together as the many limbs of a single organism, joined at the very core, pieces forming the same puzzle. A low, rumbling note encroached upon the melody from somewhere within many harmonious layers, underscoring the song's sweetness with a solid base and creating a reassuring feeling in the hearts of Armali's guests. At this point the asari were impossible to discern as individuals. They were wisps of blue, green and white smoke wafting upward from a lone flame. They twirled and twisted and turned; ducked and dove with black, featureless eyes. Their melding with one another was now absolute.

Before the dance floor – now more of a fine artist's canvas – were the guests, united in awe by this otherworldly display and its captivating composition. All disputes, personal issues, worries and woes lay powerless, forgotten in an enclosed and unreachable spot in their minds. They felt warm, humbled and empowered. They felt like privileged prophets gifted with a glimpse into the opened asari Heavens. Even the grim, war-hardened minds of Zaeed and Grunt felt the caress of this Thessian spell, and surrendered to it despite their best stubborn efforts.

The endless theories, ideas and creations blazing into existence within Mordin's consciousness found themselves lulled into a much-needed rest, and he didn't care.

Kasumi's devious thoughts drifted beyond a mere desire to steal a set of those priceless fluttering robes. She felt disarmed and confused. Those robes…there was something about the way they captured the light and blended with every surrounding colour…was she worthy of stealing them? Or would such an act besmirch them, and herself? Was she even worthy of touching them, looking upon them? She no longer knew.

The dancers seemed to melt under the lights, becoming one again, and then leapt apart, divided by a silent, invisible knife. When reforming the line after a lightning-fast sequence of moves, several onlookers jumped at the strange sight of their black, empty eyes or squinted at the way their robes somehow captured and tamed the bubbles of light welling within the overhead aquarium, then projected them outward again. Was this sorcery? What being, anywhere could tame light? Make it perform tricks like a common circus animal?

Bright robes became blinding as biotics entered the majestic fray. Beams of blue and white energy shot from upheld hands and met in the room's centre, like a supernatural bridge between creator and creation. Dark energy beams became a single mass effect field – a great spherical orb; a crystal ball holding every secret of the universe. All you had to do was look into it, become lost in its depths and irresistible promise.

The orb disintegrated in a shower of a million white sparks and a great rushing sound tore the air in two, cracking like a whip as the dancers stilled, the music died and the display ended. Water-smoothed stones, painted royal blue with lilac spirals were slowly descending upon the crowd, held by biotic energy. One fell into each of their hands. Jack's hit the bar with a graceless clatter and was soon recovered by the bartender who blushed a darker blue.

The black asari eyes returned to their lively, welcoming state and the group twitched as if waking from a vivid, alluring dream. Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews had forgotten their raging lusts completely as the song gripped them and the sight became far too sacred to desire sexually. All three young men looked pale and unnerved. No smart puns came to their lips and no lewd fantasies filled their imaginations. Instead, the trio averted their eyes with solemn respect when the dancers became common waitresses again, walking down the carpeted passage and signalling everyone to follow them.

Gabby and Ken were the last to follow. At some point during that powerful (and rather vulgar) display of showmanship – maybe the beginning, or towards the end…maybe when the biotic orb emerged and shone, maybe at the first chords of music or swish of green – they had become locked together, side-by-side. Gabby's head was resting on Kenneth's shoulder, her left arm around his waist. Kenneth had coiled his right arm around the soft skin of her exposed shoulders, resting his own head on hers. For the second time that day the duo jumped apart, and left the bar join the others.

Everyone settled around the longest blue glass table. The events that followed resembled a bizarre game of musical chairs. Zaeed insisted on facing the door should they be visited by an assassin, Hawthorne, Hadley and Matthews would only conform to a seating arrangement that didn't place any of them near Zaeed or Grunt (a sentiment that soon spread amongst the others) the doctors wanted to continue arguing without having to shout across the table, while everybody else shuffled and shifted to put Gabby and Ken opposite or next to each other, with the latter prevailing.

"Mind. Fuck," said Zaeed, trying to shake off the spell's effects.

"So when do we get to order?" said Hawthorne as the asari troupe slithered away into the kitchen without a word.

"Yeah, what's with that?" said Hadley, "I'm starving."

"I ordered a special group meal," Kelly informed them. "It's a tradition on Thessia."

"How does it work?" Hadley asked.

"Hey!" said Matthews, nudging Hadley. "You said you were an expert on Thessian history!"

Hadley shrugged. "I never claimed to be an _expert _I just…" he glanced at Gabby, "like to be kept abreast of what's going on."

Gabby's jaw clenched. The Fratboys' respectful silence was slipping away. She felt Kenneth stiffen in anger at her side.

"I for one haven't studied asari culture in years," said Hawthorne, having a nice long look of his own. "It's a distant mammary, _memory _I mean."

"Oh yeah, now that I think about it," said Matthews entering the fun. "Most of my old study guides are on the rack, uh _shelf." _

Kenneth's angry retort was cut off by Hadley, who noticed the Scotsman's brewing fury and beat him to the punch.

"Surprised we didn't see you shaking it on that dance floor, Ken," he quipped. The Fratboys' catatonia was now truly gone. "Isn't that what you people do?"

"Hadley, for the last time; watching the first half hour of _'Billy Elliot' _does not mean you know a thing about Scottish culture!" Gabby snapped, leaping to Kenneth's defence before he could.

"So-rry Mrs Doubtfire!" said Hadley.

"You calling her ugly?" Kenneth demanded, trying to get to his feet but only making it halfway with Gabby restraining him.

"Will you two just get a room?" said Hawthorne. "Oh wait…you did!"

"Here's an idea," said Goldstein. "Why don't we all talk about something else before we start killing each other?"

"She's got a point, lad," said Zaeed with a grim nod. "I've seen blokes kill each other over dinner tables for less."

Nobody quite knew what to make of this.

"Alright then," said Rolston after almost a minute of resentful silence. "So…I don't know about the rest of you, but I want to know where those spiders came from. An infestation like that isn't normal for a high-class Ilium hotel."

Kelly and Kasumi exchanged a look that was both nervous and excited.

"Not that!" barked Patel, "I don't wanna talk about that when I'm about to eat!"

"Spiders?"said Matthews with a disbelieving scowl. "I thought they were titmice."

"Just ignore them," Gabby urged Kenneth.

"We are nottalking about this at the dinner table!" Patel insisted. "There's nothing to say anyway."

"On the contrary Miss Patel," said Mordin – Dr Chakwas had not bought his argument, she was just too tired to continue challenging it; salarian metabolism was hard to outlast – "have already completed small analysis of krell specimens." His voice dropped in concern. "Implications…unpleasant; forwarded results to the Commander."

Kelly and Kasumi exchanged another look, this one containing no excitement.

"I'm sure they're fascinating and all, Doc," said Gardener evenly. "But they're far from appetising. Take it from a chef."

"Not true at all," Mordin replied. "Fried krell spider queen a delicacy to krogan warlords . Red-coated breed very prized food on Tuchanka. Often served in stews on Thessia."

"Still keeping tabs on us, salarian?" spat Grunt.

"Wasted aggression!" Zaeed said to his protégé for the second time that evening. "When're you gonna goddamn learn?"

Mordin frowned, deep in thought and unmoved by Grunt's hostility. "Messaged Shepard almost two hours ago," he mused. "Surprised he hasn't sent anything back."

Right on cue, Kasumi's omni-tool switched on with the arrival of a new private message. She examined it, blushed and typed a quick response, staring daggers at Mordin.

"Okay," said Joker, leaning back in his sparkling seat. "So we've discussed Scotland, spiders and titmice like the freaks we are. How about some appreciation for my favourite girl?"

There was a swell of mumbled agreement. The Normandy fascinated its team to no end. They anticipated its upgrades with zeal.

"The fitting of massive, dual-barrelled guns," said Hadley in an awed voice, though his eyes were on Gabby again. "Also; we're getting a Thanix Cannon!"

A distraction then appeared in the form of another asari, this one entering via the magnificent main doors. Kelly and Kasumi recognised her as one of the receptionists. She was holding a datapad and giving them an apologetic smile.

"Sorry for the inconvenience Miss Chambers," she said when reaching Kelly. "We currently have your roommate's signature for that whipped cream you wanted sent to room 5-14, but we'll need yours to complete the order.

Kelly turned a shade of red that matched her dress and lipstick, snatched the receptionist's datapen and scribbled her name.

"Couldn't have picked a worse time!" she muttered under her breath, teeth gritted as Kasumi trembled with mirth.

Kelly then looked up to a table full of amused faces, robbed of her bubbly temperament. Another timely distraction then surfaced; their asari hosts returned, surrounding the table and watching them as if awaiting their approval for something.

"Oh right!" said Kelly, picking up her spiral-patterned stone. "Everybody open yours."

"We hope the Words of our Goddess, whatever She has chosen for you, will be enriching and inspiring," said one of the hosts. "Though remember: they are for your eyes only."

The crew twisted the stones and pulled them open. Gabby and Ken found no words in theirs, but two parts of a carved, solid gold eye.

The asari nearest them gasped and beamed at the sight. "Awww!" she yelped. "You two got the Eye of Orno T'Ratha!"

"What does it mean?" said Gabby, dreading the answer.

"According to the old legends, it's a sign of destiny!" the asari said. "During the Ameth Age, if two people ended up with each part of the Eye they became bondmates!"

She left the thunderstruck couple alone, joining her colleagues as they departed for the kitchens again, and accepting a credit chit from Kelly as she went.

"And lo, the Goddess looked upon creation and said…" Hadley muttered to Hawthorne and Matthews…"When will those two finally go at it like pyjaks on meth?"

Kasumi clicked her tongue. Kelly was capable of many things, but pulling off a discreet transaction right under the thief's nose was not among them.

"Another one of your tricks?" she asked the yeoman beside her.

"Maybe."

"No subtlety at _all _Kelly."

At last the feast arrived. Perfumed air was enriched by a new variety of aromas as more asari entered, carrying the finest servings money could buy, all free of dust-form element zero. There were clusters of fat golden grapes, oozing their sweet nectar. There were platters bearing birds all shapes and sizes cooked in every way imaginable – braised, diced, shredded, fried, baked. Three more asari supplied the fish – white and red nerrelfish of the asari colonies that melted in the mouth and a bloated corrunfish boiled in wine with a thick scarlet sauce trickling down its edges. Then came the land beasts: the crew helped themselves to plump orroth legs glazed in honey, joints of sirewolf meat stuffed with sea-salted vegetables, strips of crispy selp hide; dried and dusted with white pepper. After these were soups letting off graceful spirals of orange, lavender and crimson vapour, served with wedges of freshly-baked bread. Their next helping consisted of eggs the size of footballs, capped off by half a roasted Chascan calf dripping in Thessian gravy. Made especially for Grunt was a two dozen strong stack of succulent thresher maw slices sizzling in a pot of extra-strong ryncol, followed by stewed krell spiders and a soufflé that resembled a truck tyre.

The human and salarian-friendly desserts were just as mouth-watering. The asari brought in pies draped with hand-woven webs of silken sugar, puddings encrusted with ripe berries, crunchy cakes with cores of congealed brandy and additional fresh fruits too numerous to name. In the centre of the table stood several blocks of ice, immaculately cut into the Council of the Nine Revered Prophetesses. They glinted in the fluctuating light, never melting.

"Thank God," breathed Joker in delight. "I was getting so damn sick of Rupe's calamari gumbo."

The group's feasting dominated a solid hour of conversation. Disputes lay forgotten again as everyone tucked into dish after dish of fine Thessian food, commenting on its brilliance. The only noteworthy incident in that hour occurred when the Fratboys ordered then straight away downed some Flaming Sambucas. Hawthorne forgot to blow his out, and spat the burning liquid into Grunt's face; who wiped it off while Zaeed roared with laughter. Were it not for the mercenary's lessons on self-control and wasted aggression; Hawthorne would not have left Armali Palace in one piece.

Eventually tension lifted and the atmosphere became far more laid back and friendly than anyone had thought possible. The crew, with tongues and inhibitions loosened, traded their most outrageous stories. Before long it was Kenneth's turn.

"How about you, Ken?" said Hawthorne.

"What? I wasn't in the Scouts."

"Then tell us the craziest thing you did in your youth."

"It was the only holiday the family ever took in England," said Kenneth. Gabby smiled and nodded at his side. "I once convinced a kid that if he believed hard enough, closed his eyes and ran really fast at the barrier between platforms nine and ten, he'd reach nine and three quarters."

Most in the group laughed, others gasped. _'Why?' _Goldstein mouthed.

"What happened next?" said Rolston.

"It was my little brother; we were four and six!" said Kenneth with a defensive shrug. "When he woke up and told the truth, my dad hit me over the head with a hospital bedpan."

Everyone except Grunt and Zaeed laughed, none louder than Gabby.

"I once watched a couple of girls wrestle half-naked in omni-gel," said Hawthorne. "Ended up with second-degree burns, but hey, it was their idea."

"You already told that one!" Goldstein snapped at him.

"Scout story!" shouted Matthews, raising his hand like an excited toddler. "We once had to initiate a new kid into our Scout group, no leaders involved," said Matthews. "And we convinced him the final stage of scouting involved artificially infusing biotics, and that it could only be done by melding with an asari. So we put a blindfold on him, convinced him to strip down to his boxers, then ran a bit of wet rubber on his collarbone. He thought we'd actually got a matriarch to have sex with him, boor bastard. So then-"

"I think we've heard enough," Patel snapped, wary of the superiority of asari hearing.

"Call that a hazing story?" Zaeed said with malice in his eyes. _"I_ once-"

"Zaeed," said Kasumi. "Why don't we allow the saner people to tell their stories?" She nodded at Rolston. "How about you?"

Kasumi, eager to keep the ball rolling, pointed at Joker.

"Don't wanna keep you here all night so I'll keep it brief," said Joker, voice lowered and slowed by mild drunkenness. "Long story short: I started off at Jump Zero's bar, woke up on a merchant ship headed to the Attican Traverse."

"Okay!" cried Hadley after finishing another drink. Matthews and the Fratboys were now no longer the only diners woozy from alcohol. "Craziest thing you ever did with a woman! GO!"

When receiving several disapproving looks from the women, he added "Or man! Or..." he pointed at Kelly..."whatever. And _not_ counting any quickies you had after Tech Academy, so Gabby and Ken, you'll have to come up with something else."

The couple in question flipped him off.

"Let's not share those," said Kasumi in an attempt to steer the conversation elsewhere. "Zaeed, Grunt? How was your afternoon at that vid theatre? I hear you guys watched some Earth classics."

Zaeed spat on the floor and everyone looked around to see any staff saw this. They were lucky.

"Load of absolute horseshit!"he growled without looking up from his plate. "Why'd they have to make all the orcs cockney?"

Matthews slapped a fist over his mouth and shook with stifled laughter. "Yeah," he whispered to his two friends. "It's an insult to orcs!"

It happened in the blink of an eye. To everyone watching, Zaeed just jerked his arm. When he had actually drawn a small dagger from a concealed chest pocket and flung it across the room, streaking past Matthews face and leaving a leaving a long cut across his right cheek.

Matthews let out a horrified whimper and slapped both hands over the mild laceration, falling to the floor while Mordin and Kasumi leapt to their feet and drew concealed guns on the guilty merc. Gabby and Ken leapt into each other's arms (as did Hawthorne and Hadley) Rolston, Goldstein and Patel ducked under the table, Kelly lifted up an empty plate as a shield, Gardener pulled Joker in front of him and Dr Chakwas fired up her omni-tool, finger on the panic button that would alert the Commander. Grunt continued eating.

"ZAEED!" Kelly yelled. She then noticed the button Chakwas was touching. "Why didn't he give me one of those? I'm his GIRLFRIEND!"

"Wasn't that an act of 'wasted aggression,' Massani?" said Grunt sourly.

"You're lucky to have such a bad aim Zaeed!" snarled Kasumi. "If that had hit closer to home you'd be dead right now!"

"But he's still wounded!" Kelly shrieked.

"Wounded? Bollocks, I bet he's had worse from careless wanking," said Zaeed, still not even looking up from his food. "And you two better put away those guns!"

Matthews stirred on the floor. "Why is it always me?"he sobbed.

"Oh no!"Patel groaned, pointing at where the knife had struck.

The frame of Kanera the Justicar's portrait bore a new appendage.

"Kelly!"Kasumi cried in horror to the yeoman, who put down her plate and began wringing her hands. "That's ten million credits! This is why you shouldn't be spending like this!"

"What do you mean _'spending like this?' _we've been here less than a day!" Kelly retorted.

"Oh don't think I don't know!" said Kasumi. "The dance display, the emptiness of this place, the Seer Stones!"

Frantic footsteps come from the kitchen. Mordin and Kasumi pocketed their guns, every interlocked pair of friends parted, Matthews got up and ran from the Palace, Gardener jumped in front of the portrait to hide the knife and everyone else stood up, except for Grunt and Zaeed, who remained seated, finishing off their desserts.

"What's going on in here?" exclaimed the tall asari waitress as she entered the room to find all but two guests on their feet and one of the immature humans running from the premises crying.

"Grapes!" Hawthorne squeaked before anyone could stop him. "Our friend was…kidnapped by black market crooks on the Citadel once. You know, the kind that sell krogan testicles?"

"Yeah!" Hadley giggled, drunker than everybody else. "Now just the sight of anything even remotely resembling one them sets him off."

"Nonsense!" said the bartender angrily. Everyone turned to her. "Thessian grapes don't even remotely resemble krogan testicles. The colour, shape and texture are all wrong!"

Every eyebrow in the restaurant went up.

"I…read it somewhere," the maiden added, looking down at her feet.

"That doesn't explain why you're all on your feet," said the asari waitress. Additional staff joined her.

"We're just stretching our legs," Patel lied, joining Gardener in shielding the knife.

The asari staff watched, narrow-eyed, still not convinced. Goldstein, Joker and Rolston then joined this disastrous attempt to cover Zaeed's crime by standing in front of Patel and Gardener.

"Why are five of you humans stood in front of Justicar Kanera's portrait? Did Mr Matthews leave a mess before he ran out?"

"Well...kind of," Joker muttered.

"I'll have it cleaned," said the asari. She snapped her fingers and three waitresses started towards where Matthews had sat.

"NO!" Kelly screamed, stopping them in their tracks.

Gabby and Ken buried their heads in their hands. This was it. They were all done for.

"Miss Chambers, explain yourself before I ban all of you!" barked the tall waitress.

"W-w-we just-" Kelly stammered.

"We just wouldn't want you to overexert yourselves," said Goldstein. "Cleaning up after us when you don't need to."

The asari (all of them) appeared deeply offended.

"What my colleague is trying to say," Rolston said through teeth gritted with nerves. "Is that-"

Kasumi dived forward, worming through the small crowd to Gardener.

"What we're all trying to say," the thief stated, "is that," she squeezed between Gardener and Patel, "is that Mr Matthews has not left any mess that we can't handle ourselves. And to atone for his disrespectful attire; we'll clean up after him ourselves."

"Nonsense. Mr Matthews and his friends have shown extreme disrespect with their clothing but the fact is: you're still paying customers, we will clean it ourselves."

"That won't be necessary," Kelly half-laughed, half-cried.

Kasumi yanked out the knife and slid it into a hidden pocket of her own, keeping her expression neutral and then slipped a device over the frame.

"And now that our legs are fully stretched," said the thief, tapping Morse code on the backs of her surrounding shipmates, "I think we can sit down again."

"No!" Kelly repeated, eyes wide with terror.

"Trust me Kelly," Kasumi's teeth were now clenched. "It's okay to just," she tapped the code again. "Sit. Down."

Slowly, reluctantly, the others went back to their seats. Kasumi then followed. Everyone drew in worried breaths.

But the frame of Kanera's portrait was no longer marred; it appeared just as flawless as ever.

"Well then, if you insist," said the waitress, taking a long look at the painting. "We'll be in the kitchens, call us if you need anything."

"Will do!" Kelly chirped, too relieved to think straight.

The suspicious hosts of Armali Palace retreated.

"How the bloody hell did you fix that thing?" asked an astounded Kenneth.

"One of my trusty devices," Kasumi said. "It's a Chameleon Duplicator." She nodded at the painting. "Right now that thing's mirroring a part of the frame that isn't punctured and projecting it over the puncture itself."

"How long is its battery power?" Gabby inquired.

"Six months."

"Guess we can never come back here again after that," said Joker miserably.

"I'm keeping this knife, Zaeed!" Kasumi whispered in the guilty merc's ear.

"The hell you are! I killed Rattokk with that thing!"

Dr Chakwas burst into tears. "I didn't leave the Alliance for _this!" _she wept. "What happened to my life? What am I even doing here?"

Joker and Mordin patted her shoulders, unable to come up with any tactful answers.

With everyone else focused on the doctor's breakdown, Kelly picked up a wine glass and lurched forward, spilling the drink down the front of Gabby's dress.

"Oops!" she yelped as Gabby recoiled in shock. "Look at that! What a klutz I am! KENNETH! Better escort her to the bathroom, not the one in here, the one out there; that's the one with leather-cleaning facilities! Go go go!"

She shoved the two of them out the door.

"What was the point of that?" Kasumi said, pulling Kelly to one side and fearing for her sanity.

Kelly shrugged. "They'd be alone for a few minutes and he'dbe staring at her breasts the whole time with no asari in the way. No harm done."

"You remember what I said about subtlety an hour ago, right?"

"We may be having the craziest night in Armali Palace's history," Kelly sighed. "But so help me God I'm still going to win this thing!"

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fourth Floor**

It was strange seeing Gabby like this, Kenneth thought. Over the years he'd become accustomed to all her usual quirks and qualities, and they didn't include low-cut dresses and dinners in high-roller restaurants. With fondness, he recalled those bright brown eyes shining through her dirt-covered face in the Edmonton simulators and bowels of the Perugia during their more arduous test. Or the way she screwed her face up in concentration when they were presented with an engineering conundrum. Kenneth was more used to seeing her face in the glow of the Drive Core or low light of the Fourth Deck, with no makeup decorating it.

Tonight she looked strange indeed.

But despite this, he beheld her with a lover's eye; in wonder, eager to take in every detail, preserve them as treasured memories. Kenneth realised the terrifying truth that she could now appear beautiful to him in any form. This was not 'regular' Gabby. But 'irregular' Gabby was still Gabby. _His _Gabby. There were still things about her he didn't yet know; sides to her still undiscovered. Tonight he had discovered a different side. He wanted more.

After a few minutes they reached the floor's bathroom and his daydream ended.

"Back in two ticks," she said, and swept around the corner.

"_Two ticks?" _

The speaker had a dual-toned, flanging voice; and a rather aristocratic accent.

Kenneth spun round. A well-dressed turian with a brown face and white markings stood before him, holding an almost drained martini glass.

"Why would she return in…" his plated features shifted as the realisation hit him…"oh I see! Could your companion be referring to the old-fashioned clocks you humans used to use?" He tapped a long finger against the glass, creating a light ticking noise. "Yes?"

Kenneth nodded. "Aye, that's right."

He slapped his forehead. "Of course that's what she was talking about! I was almost certain your friend was referring to the small parasitic things that you levo-amino folk have to deal with every so often."

Kenneth just grunted. Was this turian mocking him or just weirdly curious?

"And now that almost twenty ticks have passed and it is still merely two of us in this extravagant corridor; I'll presume she was exercising that oh-so endearing human habit of frequent exaggeration?"

"Yeah she was," muttered Kenneth.

"Excellent!" exclaimed the turian in delight. "For a moment I thought you were both mad."

Kenneth grunted again, making it clear he had no desire to exchange small-talk about human eccentricities, but the turian pressed on.

"You must be with that charming, rowdy group based on the fifth floor, am I correct?"

"I suppose you are," said Kenneth after a reluctant pause. He wondered how long this conversation would go before he had to start withholding information or outright lying. Shore leave or not; Cerberus operatives always needed to be discreet.

"And if my information is accurate," said the turian, "you're currently plagued by an unfortunate infestation. Are there krell spiders on your floor?"

Kenneth nodded. "More than you could shake a stick at," he admitted.

"And why would I want to 'shake a stick' at those things?" the turian asked.

"I dunno," said Kenneth. "It's just a turn of phrase."

"How exactly would I go about 'turning a phrase,' good sir?"

"Do you want something?" Kenneth snapped, losing his patience.

The turian's face plates shifted again as another realisation dawned. "Scotland!" he exclaimed. "I thoughtthat accent sounded unique."

"Right."

"Oh you Scots are a fascinating human subspecies!" the turian said with a joyous nod.

Kenneth frowned. 'Subspecies?'

"So many idioms!" the turian continued. "Like when you say 'can I' instead of 'cannot.' Or w-"

"You mean _cannae," _said Kenneth, feeling his temper shorten.

"That's what I said!" countered the turian with a dismissive wave of his hand.

"Um…hi," said Gabby, re-joining Kenneth.

"Don't mind me young lady, I was just forcing your other half into making uncomfortable conversation."

Gabby blushed. "He's not my other ha-"

"And now it appears I've embarrassed you as well." He gave them an ostentatious bow. "My apologies. Forgive this curious, martini-swilling turian."

Gabby shrugged. "You know, don't take this the wrong way," she began.

"I wouldn't know which way to take it on my best day, dear lady. Whatever 'it' is."

Gabby laughed. Kenneth glared.

"You're not like the other turians we've met," said Gabby.

"Oh I'm not Ilium-born ma'am. I'm actually on what you might call a vacation." He finished the martini. "Two years ago I came into some money following a high-profile scandal on Noveria. At my insane sister's behest I sold the story to a writer of musicals and started a Nos Astra restaurant in my own name."

He sighed. "Both ended up being named as terrible puns, probably written by some self-important hack who can only publish fanfiction on the extranet. But luckily for me I kept my post managing Synthetic Insights; this is just a courtesy visit."

"Right," said Gabby, not sure if she believed him. "Well we should..." her voice trailed off and she looked at Kenneth for help.

"Go," said Kenneth bluntly.

The turian bowed again. "Oh well, nice meeting you Miss…?"

"Daniels."

"And Mr…?"

"Donnelly."

"Indeed? A descendent of the legendary Scottish comedian?"

"No!" he yelled, "_Donnelly!" _

"My mistake. Have a pleasant evening."

The turian walked back into his restaurant.

"He seemed nice," Gabby said. "Kinda weird but, memorable."

Kenneth groaned. He had no luck with turians.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fourth Floor, Armali Palace**

When Gabby and Ken returned, Pandora's Box was halfway open. Dr Chakwas had not stopped crying and was still being comforted by Mordin and Joker. Goldstein, Patel and Rolston and Kasumi were on their feet, waiting for the bill to arrive so they could get the hell out of dodge, Gardener had finally slipped over the line of intoxication, Grunt and Zaeed were playing another game of Irish Snap, Hadley and Hawthorne were calling for more drinks and Kelly appeared on the edge of a nervous breakdown that would outstrip even the doctor's.

Hadley caught the redhead's eye with a whirl of his arms. "I kespect you, Relly!" he boomed at her.

"Excuse me?" she said weakly.

"I respect you Kelly! When you see someone…or…or some_thing…_" he pointed at Grunt…"that you want to do, you just cut the crap and _do _them. Or it. That's so admirable, not caring what people think, you got a lotta body. I mean bottle."

"Thanks," muttered Kelly as she tried to steer him out the door before any more disarming compliments were handed out.

"I mean, it's takes _real _character!" he continued. "We're all up there on the bridge saying 'wow what a skank, she must have a gash the size of Klendagon's Great Rift' but you don't care! You keep your head up and your legs open and you won't take shit from _anybody!_ To you!"

He raised a non-existent glass.

"Oh Hadley, shut up!"moaned Patel as her and the remaining bridge crew put as much space between themselves and Kelly as possible.

In all the conversations the bridge crew had enjoyed on Kelly's merry personal life, no one had been that direct. But Hadley was revealing an unfortunate talent for summarising all of them put together.

Hawthorne was now discussing the difficulty of rooting out spies with Gardener, who only seemed capable of smiling and nodding with a faraway look in his eye.

"How do you know?"snarled Hawthorne, now almost blind drunk. His hair was dishevelled and collar open. He gestured at Kasumi. "Spies, I mean! Could be surrounded by 'em! I mean lookat her; can't see her face, we don't even know if she's really Asian!"

"You know the best thing about you asari?" Hadley slurred to the nearest waitress as they all returned to begin cleaning up and he broke free from Kelly's clutches. "The bestthing, i- is…wait…no that's the _third _best thing. Third and fourth because there are two," he said, pointing to each of her breasts. "The best thing," he stood up and threw his arms out. "Is that whether you're a maiden, or um…or um,_ matron,_ or…_matriarch: _you're always a MILF!"

"Okay," said Kasumi, grabbing him and smiling in a poisonous way. "Time for us all to go, methinks!"

Another shell-shocked asari left Kelly and Kasumi a bill laid in a bed of opals.

Grunt seized a handful and stuffed them into his mouth, chewing loudly.

"Bleeeeaaaargh!" he spluttered, spitting chunks everywhere. "These candies are chalky and unpleasant!"

"Time to go, now!"Kelly squawked. "EVERYONE BACK TO THE FIFTH FLOOR!"

Gabby and Ken were the first ones out the door.

"Bed?" he said with the slightest hint of a snicker.

"Sure, just get me the hell outta here," she sighed.

* * *

**FINALLY! Grunt gets to quote Lrrr, Ruler of Omicron Persei 8!**


	14. Affection

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor**

Gabby and Ken reached the bedroom door feeling jovial and still re-enacting their favourite moments from the night's farce. It was relief to skip ahead of the rest of their party. Grunt carried out the unconscious Fratboys while Zaeed tried to console Kasumi and Kelly with the information that he always put tranquiliser on dagger blades and Matthews was probably just passed out in a bathroom somewhere. Dr Chakwas refused to be helped out by Mordin (who then switched to carrying out Gardener) and would only let Joker touch her. This proved tricky as Joker's Vrolik's Syndrome and desire to pass on contact details to the now sickened bartender prevented him from being an effective shoulder to lean on.

What happened next was a mystery to them, and neither felt like lingering in the corridor to find out.

Kenneth struggled to open 5-12's door, still shaking with laughter at Gabby's impression of Hawthorne and dizzy with excitement at what was or wasn't about to occur.

They entered the bedroom, which was illuminated by a moonbeam creeping under the drawn curtains. Kenneth switched on the light and once again, the two of them stood in a lair of shimmering periwinkle beauty. The air was sweet-scented like Armali's, but this time its effect made them drowsy.

"Never seen anything quite like that," said Gabby, sitting on a chair by the wardrobe and yanking her undersized shoes off with relief.

Kenneth closed the door behind him and gulped. There was no going back now.

"That's because you've never been to a pub in Dundee on New Year's Eve," he said with a yawn.

"No..." she said, blushing and giving him a long, testing look. "I haven't."

_Was that too forward? _she thought, keeping her eyes on him and burning face neutral.

But Kenneth was more amused than abashed. "You actually wantto go there?" he said.

She smiled. "Maybe...one day when...all this is over we could...I dunno..." She masked bumbling hesitance with humour. "What's the matter? Scared I'll drink you under the table again, Ken?"

"One time that happened Gab!" he fumed, though he was still trying to suppress laughter and his mind was screaming its approval at Gabby's proposal. "One bloody time!"

"One time's all it takes, Kenneth," she said with a teasing wink.

He half-laughed, half-yawned and leaned against the door. What exactly were they postponing?

"You think Matthews will be alright?" he said, trying to change the subject to something that made fewer emotional demands.

Gabby didn't respond, her eyes were fixed on the wall to his left. "Hey, what the hell's that?" she said, pointing at the wall.

Neither of them noticed it at first. Next to their bed was what had been a large, empty picture frame, waiting to be filled. It now bore a photograph of the two of them staring at the Ilium skyline, moments after departing from the SR-2. They stared.

"Must've been Kasumi," said Gabby after an uncomfortable moment in silence.

"Aye, it must've."

They stared at the photo, wishing it wasn't so impressive.

"So do you wanna keep it?" said Kenneth, turning back to her.

"Yes," she said at once. "I mean…noif you don't want…if…you. Do _you _want to keep it?"

He shrugged. "She didn't ask our permission or anything, and you know how everyone'll be if they find out."

Kenneth had a point. But what else could they do to humiliate themselves further, short of being caught in _flagrante delicto _by a camera-wielding Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani?

"We'll keep it," Gabby said abruptly. "It's nice."

He shrugged a second time. "Never said it wasn't 'nice,' I just thought it was a bit too..."

Gabby cocked an eyebrow, a smirk tugged at the corners of her mouth. "What?"

"Fine," he said, now irritable. "We'll keep it."

Gabby stood up and went into the bathroom to get changed. Kenneth made his own preparations with her gone. He stripped down and replaced the evening wear with a baggy white shirt and pair of boxer shorts (longer than all his other pairs - he didn't want anything slipping out). Then, with more reluctance and frustration than he would have admitted to anybody, he reached into the bottom drawer on the dresser pulled out a comfy blue sleeping bag acquired from reception earlier.

Gabby returned from the bathroom wearing black satin pyjamas and rubbing her eyes. Her face was red-raw from her hurried makeup removal.

"So Ken," she said, "wha- oh."

She spotted the sleeping bag and felt a stab of disappointment.

"What?" he said, motionless.

He looked from Gabby to the bed. _Does she want me to? Oh my god I've underestimated her; she's a __man eater!_

"Nothing," Gabby said. "I just thought...never mind."

She turned away from him and climbed into the bed, drawing all the four-poster's curtains.

Kenneth groaned and squirmed into the sleeping bag, still feeling the unyielding hardness of the floor. He clapped the light out, and the delicate sheen of moonlight returned.

"I didn't know you could clap these out," said Gabby with mild surprise.

"That's why they didn't make you a Power Engineer," he said smugly.

"And yet Mordin chose me to tweak his room," she threw back without missing a beat.

Kenneth tutted. "Poor, poor guy," he said in a solemn voice.

Gabby yawned and curled up, drawing the sheets around her. "Night," she said.

_"What?"_ he cried in disbelief. "That's all we're talking about?"

"I thought I'd try getting an early night for once."

"Don't leave me hangin' Gabby," he said in a playful manner. "At least tell me you think of our new quarian boss!"

"We've discussed this Kenneth," she said. "You ended up finding out how good quarian hearing is, remember?"

"Yeah, but now that she's gone, I figured we'd be better suited to talk about it."

She chortled. "I guess this means you want to talk about that 'snug suit' and 'beautiful bucket' a little more?"

"Oh, there's those," he droned, "but first I just wanted your opinion on the lass."

"Yeah," she said with suspicion. "I haven't been able to tell you everything yet, have I? What with you falling asleep early so much recently…"

He shifted in discomfort and gave her no chance to follow this up.

"You really like Tali," he said, dropping his volume.

"Sure do," she agreed. "I thought that was obvious. Why'd you ask?"

"She's like you," he said.

Gabby frowned. "How exactly?"

"Thought it was obvious."

"Nope. Enlighten me, Engineer Donelly."

"Tali's...a natural leader. You'll be a Chief Engineer one day."

She lifted her head up. "You think so?"

"Of course you will...provided you can grow your figure into one of those enviro-suits!"

"You dick!"she struggled to say through a shriek of laughter. "And this from a guy with a head so inflated he couldn't even wear the helmet!"

She opened the curtain Kenneth was adjacent to, and he caught the glint of her brown eyes in the dark. They were bright and alive with merriment.

"Again," he said, "I must say in my defence, that Scotsmen have no trouble ending up with their heads in buckets, provided they've drunk enough!"

"But seriously, Ken," she said, "is that what you really think? The whole 'leadership' thing?"

"Yeah," he said, looking her dead in the eye. "It is. You're the one Shepard goes to when he wants an opinion or trustworthy info. You're the level-headed one. I'm the 'Highlander sidekick,' remember?"

"Oh, I dunno about that," she teased. "You do have _some _redeeming features."

"I know, I know," he said. "An engineering duo's incomplete without the eye-candy."

Gabby laughed again. "Too true!"

But when calming down, she saw no amusement on his face. The darkness was thick and her view of him was only vague, but after all this time she could just sense when something was wrong.

"Gabby, I just..." he sighed, "...I just hope that...one day when you're a Chief, giving orders and handing out whippings on whatever ship you end up assigned to, you...won't forget the little moments. The 'lowly grease monkey' ones. When we were stickin' the man."

"Kenneth," she giggled. "Who says I even want to climb that high?"

His eyebrows shot up. "You don't?"

"And miss out of all the playful banter?" She smiled. "Relax; I'm right where I want to be Ken, I wouldn't trade this for anything."

He sighed, contented. "Good. And Gab?"

"Hmm?"

"Where do you think I'll end up?"

She grinned. "Shall I tell you what you want to hear, or what you need to?"

"What I want, of course! Flatter me girl!"

"Well," she said, stretching. "I always envisioned you with blue paint over one half of your face, leading the last stand against those 'Ainglish pegs.'

"Thank you very much, lass! That _is_ what I wanted to hear!" he boomed. "Oh what might have been...If only I wasn't such a good engineer."

"Never too late to give it a try Ken."

"Sure," he snorted. "I think I'll start with Zaeed."

"Speaking of Zaeed," she said. "When are you goi-"

"And your honest opinion?" he blurted out, cutting her off.

She sighed at his persistent evasiveness, and wondered why he was so insecure on this issue.

"Ken, you were the best Power Engineer that ever went to Edmonton. You'll go as far as you want. Why'd you even need to ask?"

"No reason, just my male insecurity flaring up."

Ten minutes passed in silence. Gabby felt her eyelids getting heavier. The curtain was still open and she could still discern his form, but Kenneth's constant squirming was keeping her awake.

"This floor feels weird," Kenneth whined after a noisy bout of tossing and turning. "It kind of slopes. Are hotel floors supposed to slope like this?"

She just made a puzzled noise. "Dunno, never been on one."

"You'd a think the floor in a bloody asari place would be a bit more comfortable," he grunted.

"Probably because people aren't supposed to sleep on them," she joked. "It's kind of a high-brow place Kenny."

"Indeed," he said in a low, husky voice. "There were quite a few high brows at what _you _were wearing!"

"None higher than yours!" she retorted, amazed at how sultry her voice went when the words came out.

They both gulped nervously. This conversation was drifting into dangerous territory.

Silence fell. Two more minutes of it.

"Still," he uttered, making her jump. "I can't see why that can't at least tryto-"

"What are you getting at, Kenneth?" Gabby said, wishing he'd be more direct.

"Nothing," he snapped.

"Cos all you have to do is ask!"

"I never said I wanted to-"

Gabby groaned into her pillow. "Oh for goodness sake!" she hissed. "Just...come up here and get in!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Come on, before I change my mind!"

Unfortunately for Kenneth, his brain's plan for the daily balancing act of supressing all inappropriate feelings for Gabby while spending as much time with her as possible did not consist of climbing into bed next to her in a flower-scented periwinkle room with a romantic picture on the wall. But his heart saw no problem with this. Who was he to turn her down?

He withdrew from the bag and crept across the room, hoping his body's natural alarm clock would wake him before she noticed...that thing men's bodies do while they sleep.

_Oh no! _Gabby thought as Kenneth came towards the bed. _This is wrong! This is so wrong because it's exactly what I want! People shouldn't be allowed to have what they really want because we might screw it up, and then it'll go away forever._

The far side of the bed yielded under a new weight. Gabby's heart was in her throat.

_What's he gonna think? I exhibited T+A then flirted with him all night, and now we're actually in bed together and I'm not going to do anything because I'm too damn scared! _

Kenneth rolled over. She felt his eyes on her. Perhaps he expected them to do the usual thing of staying up for a few more hours, chatting, cracking jokes…or something more.

_He must think I'm such a tease. Which I am, but I don't mean to be! I don't even know if he feels anything, not that I've ever asked. _

She stifled a sob. _I'm so pathetic!_

"Gab, you okay?" said Kenneth, hearing the sob, filling with dread.

"Yeah," she said. Her voice still very high. "Fine."

"You sounded like you were cr-"

"No," she insisted.

"Don't worry," he said in a soothing voice. "I understand what you're feeling right now."

Her tired eyes flew open. "You do?"

This was it.

"Of course, I do, and you've got nothing to worry about. I'm thinking the same thing."

"You are?"

Gabby's whole body twitched as she decided not to turn and face Kenneth midway through performing the motion. Bedhead Kenneth, lying on a pillow, staring at her eye-to-eye in the light of the moon was nota sight she would permit herself to see.

She heard him chuckle. "I'll respect the 50% rule if you do."

She almost choked on her laughter. "Believe me Ken, the moment you lay down here I was guarding my half of the sheets!"

"Just thought I'd give you fair warning, woman!" he quipped, nudging her. "Pull my side off of me and you willpay for it!"

She rather liked the idea of conversing with him here in the dark, with her body turned away, feeling his soft breath on the nape of her neck and the warmth of his close body. It was a happy medium. There was no irritating wall to separate them and muffle their voices and at the same time, the darkness and dishonest excuse for her posture ('this is how I normally sleep') meant they could talk without the awkward moments of locked eyes, blushes and shy smiles.

"I've got something to tell you," he said with a flare of certainty.

"What?" Gabby breathed.

'_I love you and want us to move to France, live in sin and eat cake?' _

"Gabby," he said, voice now almost lower than a whisper. "I've been a fucking gobshite!"

"Kenneth!"

"It's true." His voice trembled with apologetic regret. "You looked perfect tonight. And the…y'know? Jeans and everything earlier? No problems there. At all. Seriously. I should've told you."

She beamed, blinking back tears. "Thank you!" she squeaked. "And you looked…really handsome." She meant it, she meant every word, but her hesitance made him doubt her.

He giggled, placing his hand on her side and caressing her through the silken duvet. They both drew in breath at the sudden contact, though Gabby didn't tell him to stop. Both of them were still feeling rather bold and affectionate from all the Thessian alcohol, though they were far from intoxicated. Every word and action was sincere.

"You don't have to lie to return the favour," he said. "There was only one show-stealer in that room tonight."

_Oh Kenneth, just shut up and fall asleep so I can shamelessly stare at you and stroke your hair! _

Before giving herself the chance to think about it, Gabby pulled her left arm from beneath the covers and touched Kenneth's.

"I wasn't lying," she said, giving his hand a squeeze.

"You were, you're just getting better. It's one of the many skills you've picked up from me," he whispered with pride.

"Hmmm. Guess once I can kill a Darkborn Ogre on insanity, I'll be on easy street."

He laughed and squeezed her hand again.

"Kenneth?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not gonna put you under any more pressure to tell me what happened with Zaeed," she whispered.

"Gabby," he said, leaning forward. "I –"

"Whatever it is," she breathed comfortingly. "I hope you can solve your problem one day."

He entwined his fingers with hers. "I hope so too."

And with that, Gabby and Ken slipped into sleep.


	15. Aftershocks

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall**

"_Unbelievable!" _Shepard snarled as he entered Nos Astra Hotel's Entrance Hall accompanied by Miranda, Jacob, Garrus and Tali, who were all keeping quiet in the face of what had been a twenty minute rant on the oddities of the galaxy.

"I mean, what are the odds?" he spat as they went by a well-dressed salarian businessman, looking up from his datapad's morning news feed to stare at them. They were all still clad in full combat gear and this alone drew more than enough undesirable attention, but Shepard wasn't done yet.

"Seriously though, what are they?" he demanded again as they reached the desk and stood waiting for the concierge to check them in. "All I heard growing up was 'it's a big galaxy!' And don't get me wrong!" he said as Miranda opened her mouth in an attempt to calm him down. "I can handle bumping into Shiala or Parasini but Nassana Dantius? Conrad Verner? What next?" he slammed a fist down onto the desk's bell. "You gonna tell me Aria is actually Wrex's old friend Aleena? Maybe Aethyta's Liara's dad! Who knows, it's a big _fucking _galaxy!"

"It israther unlikely," Miranda agreed, following a horrifying moment when the Commander's accented f word rang off the walls to grace the ears of every other resident in the room; echoing for what seemed like an eternity. None of Shepard's companions were prepared to reveal Lorik Qui'in's presence on the fourth floor. Shepard respected the wiley, silver-tongued turian, but the last thing the Commander needed was further validation mid-rant.

The salarian businessman stood up and walked over, no longer able to contain his mixed feelings of curiosity and outrage.

"What are you supposed to be?" he said to Shepard in a condescending voice, "some kind of cosmonaut?"

"Well actually…" Shepard replied, considering this…"yes."

The salarian grunted in disappointment. "I thought you were the exterminators. They still haven't got rid of those disgustingcreatures!"

Shepard snorted and patted on of the many guns, collapsed and encased on his armour.

"Those'd have to be some big spiders!" he said. "Bite your head off."

The salarian failed to see the amusement in this, and departed with a curt nod. Garrus and Tali exchanged an incredulous look – or as much of a look as Tali was capable of projecting. Humans had an odd sense of humour.

Jacob turned to Miranda. "Did that sound familiar to you?" he muttered.

Miranda groaned and hit the bell harder. She was too irked by the news of what had occurred in Armali Palace the night before to play along with this. Even with that debacle over, planting such a diverse and combustible crew in the civilised world would always put them on the edge of disaster.

This would especially be the case if Kelly Chambers found out about Gianna Parasini and Shiala's bold actions the previous day.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Gabby and Ken's room**

"Wake up sleepy head!" said Gabby, pulling a curtain on their four-poster open and throwing a small blueberry muffin, which landed in his sagging mouth.

"Mmmph!" he wailed, gripping the muffin in his teeth while trying to free himself from the tangle of bed sheets that had somehow ended up wrapped so tight around him. Had she…tucked him in at some point? He banished the thought.

"Time is it?" he grunted, rubbing a forearm over his eyes and letting out a huge yawn.

She shrugged. "I dunno…two? Two thirty?"

"WHAT?"

"Relax Ken, it's not like you've missed anything." She leapt onto the bed, landing by his side and crossing her legs. She was fully dressed. "Half of us are hung over and the other half…aren't speaking to the first half."

She drew her knees to her chest, her expression more serious. "Also, you might wanna avoid the fourth floor. Completely. For the rest of our stay. And if you- _we _ever come back."

"No shit," he said, yawning again. "Still," he sat up, "could've woken me up a _bit _earlier."

She cocked her head to one side and pulled a motherly, if rather patronising face.

"But you wooked sho peashful!" she cooed.

Kenneth seized one of the squashy pillows and aimed a blow at her head, which she deflected with her hands, letting out a shriek of laughter.

"You'll have to do better than that!" she said, shuffling backwards on the bed to avoid his second shot and grabbing a pillow of her own. She responded with a horizontal swish.

"Ow! That one has corners!" Kenneth protested, rubbing his right eye.

"You snooze, you lose Ken," she said triumphantly, raising the offending object again.

Before he could weigh the consequences on his brain's awkward-o-meter, Kenneth decided against keeping this a purely pillow-to-pillow duel and jumped forward, tackling her. They fell onto the far side of the bed. Gabby let out a scream of surprise and unexpected pleasure, writhing beneath his weight before going still, staring into his eyes and giggling. Kenneth pinned her arms above her head with a triumphant laugh.

"Where's your skill now eh?" he said in a low voice, leaning in close. She struggled again for a few moments, sensing what was about to come next.

"Kenneth, if you dare_…" _she whispered.

"Dare what?" he challenged with an almost innocent smirk on his face. He withdrew one hand from Gabby's trapped forearms and placed in on her side.

"Oh, this?" He tickled the sensitive spot.

"Kenneth!" she squeaked, only just able to voice the word due to the torrent of giggles escaping her against her will. "Stop it!"

"Stop what?" he said, increasing his attack. She was now laughing louder than ever. "Sorry Gab," he added, "can't hear you!"

"I'll kill you!" she cried, squirming. "I swear to God I will!"

This only encouraged Kenneth further. He released her arms, enabling him to tickle two-handed. Despite her protests and hysterical threats, Kenneth couldn't help but notice how little she was doing to properly fight him off.

Sudden, angry knocking at the door brought their daring bout to an end. It was Hawthorne.

"Get a room you two!" he shouted, still sounding rather slurred and unfocused.

"We're in a room!" Gabby yelled back without thinking about how this must have sounded.

"Well then keep it down, Princess Fiona!" He stumbled off again.

With this cursed interruption, the closeness of their bodies – and embarrassing fact that they were lying on a bed – became much more apparent. Kenneth felt Gabby's breathing intensify, her eyes brightened and bored into his. He let her go, falling back onto his pillow.

Gabby was furious with the interruption but glad to be free of her friend's torturous tickling. She settled onto her own side, at last allowing herself a look at Kenneth as they lay there.

"What time are the bug zappers gonna show up?" he asked.

Gabby said nothing. He shifted in discomfort and felt a nervous smile flicker over his face. She was staring.

"Hmm?" she mumbled, not even blinking.

"I said what time are the-"

"Oh!" she exclaimed, sitting up as If snapping out of a trance. "They uh…well yesterday we were told that they'd show up here first thing but," she shook her head, chuckling, "after our little dinner at Armali, I get the feeling they won't be making the biggest effort to look after us."

"Yeah, it was pretty crazy," he said. "Come to think of it, I've got a bit of a headache myself."

He massaged his forehead as if the point needed stressing further. Gabby pointed to a small bedside table on his left.

"Oh," he said, reaching for the medicine bottle. "Just like old times, uh?" He took a sip, smiling at her. "Still wish you'd woken me up earlier."

"It wasn't worth the effort," she said with a cheeky grin. "You're a pretty deep sleeper."

"I have to be."

"What do you mean?"

Kenneth placed both hands under his head and let out a series of animalistic snorts.

"I do not snore!" said Gabby with wide eyes.

Kenneth increased the volume and absurdity of his snorting, though it faltered under his cocky grin.

"Every night!" he said, cracking up at her scandalised look, "through the wall I have to listen to it. Last night was like sleeping on a dreadnought's thrusters!"

"This from the man who talks in his sleep!" she said, crossing her arms.

"Oh, bugger off with your nonsense!" he said incredulously.

"It's true!" she insisted. "Doesn't happen very often but still…" She frowned. "Who's 'Orwell?' "

Kenneth's smile vanished, so did hers when the truth hit. Gabby rose from the bed and hurried off, mumbling a pathetic excuse about her hair as she reached the bathroom.

"So…" said Kenneth, trying to sound as if he hadn't just received such a big shock, "wanna go out somewhere? Get something to eat, drink?"

"Actually I had a pretty cool idea for today," she said from her blue-tiled sanctuary.

"What?"

She emerged, still red in the face. "I thought we could visit the old girl; see how she's dealing with her upgrades."

"Great," said Kenneth with enthusiasm, forgetting her faux pas. "Let's go right now!"

"First," she flung a pile of clothing that caught him square in the face, "get dressed."

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Kasumi's Room**

"I've got to admit Kelly," said Kasumi, strolling to the window of her soft cyan bedroom, "I underestimated you. They came much closer to the big confession last night than I thought they would."

"How many listening devices did you plant?" Kelly asked from her armchair by the bed.

Kasumi turned to face her, running a hand over her painted lips like she did whenever trying to recollect.

"A dozen? Maybe more."

"What did they talk about?"

"Usual stuff for them: America and Scotland, what they wanted to do career-wise when all this was over, Gabby's choice of outfit-"

"Oh?"

"It didn't go as far as we wanted."

"Oh."

"At least not for a while."

"Oh!"

"Anyway," said Kasumi, wracking her brains, "then they talked about the 50% rule-"

"Oh god I hateit when men bitch about that!" said Kelly hotly.

"I know, right? Anyway, he starts moaning about the hardness of the floor and so she-"

"Wait a minute, the 50% rule?" said Kelly, interrupting again. "That means they ended up-"

"Yes, I was just getting to that Kelly," said Kasumi with a stern frown. "So; he complains about the hardness of the floor right up until the point where she can't take it anymore, so she invites him in."

Kelly nodded, pleased by the proficiency of her handiwork. So close…it wouldn't take much more pressure at this point. A nagging thought then flared up without warning.

"Wait, when you say they shared that bed, were they…?"

"What?"

"Which end did Kenneth's head end up resting on, top or bottom?"

Kasumi snickered. "What are they, eight year-olds at a sleepover, with Mommy just outside the door in her rocking chair with her shotgun, in case any no-no doin' starts a'transpirin'?" she said.

"Just asking," said Kelly, folding her arms, not liking the Southern American turn in Kasumi's accent as the words came out.

Kasumi pulled the stolen keycard from a subtle pocket, twirling it in her graceful, playful way.

"So there," the thief said, "I managed to buy you one night. The exterminators are on their way Kelly. It's time for you to move onto the next plan."

Kelly arms were still folded, her tone was still defensive. "Did that pretty picture of yours go down well?"

Kasumi blinked, surprised to find herself outsmarted. It was not a good feeling. "You saw that?" she said.

"Sure did."

Kasumi gave a non-committed shrug, not really sure how well that particular scheme of hers had gone down. "They decided to keep it," she said, "didn't say much else though."

"Do you think they'll want to stay in 5-12, even with separate rooms now available?"

"Oh Kelly," said Kasumi in her half-endearing, half-insulting way, sitting by Kelly's side and touching her shoulder. "It may be hard to believe but; Gabby and Ken don't intentionally set out to embarrass themselves. They're pretty terrible at being discreet about their feelings but, I think asking the Commander if they can continue to sleep together without any 'official' reason is something even they know how to avoid."

Kelly smiled sadly, more at Gabby and Ken's poor, confused state than at Kasumi.

"They can tell the Commander if they want!" the yeoman protested.

"No they can't Kelly."

"And why not?"

"Because if they do, Honey Chops will tell you, and you'll 'let it slip' during breakfast or something, and they'll blush and we'll laugh and…this whole thing of ours will go back to square one."

It was Kasumi's turn to cross her arms. "And I've got _way _too much Jacob seducing to do for that to happen."

"How's that going, by the way?" Kelly asked, trying to mask her surprise at Kasumi's knowledge of the pet name 'Honey Chops' – she only used it when they were together – never in message form.

"You've got other things to focus on Kelly."

"What?"

Kasumi activated an omni-tool. Kelly's omni-tool to be precise. "Because Tootsiepop himself has just returned." The thief's eyes twinkled.

Kelly took back the device and walked over to the dresser, examining her reflection one more time.

"Thank God," she breathed, pouting and rearranging her wavy red hair. "It'll be nice to have someone else in charge of making sure Matthews stops picking fights that put him in mortal danger."

Matthews latest brush with severe injury – this one at Zaeed's well-trained hand – had ended with him, true to the mercenary's words, passed out in a fourth floor men's bathroom from the poison.

"Shepard and Lawson'll talk some sense into the guy," said Kasumi with a nod of reassurance that was meant for herself just as much as it was for Kelly.

"We dropped a lotof bribe money last night," Kelly said, bitterness and residual anger in her voice. "But I don't think even we could've wormed our way out of one of the crew showing up dead in an over-described corridor."

"Over-what?"

"Decorated, I meant."

"Oh."

Kelly's expression hardened. She checked her omni-tool, looking more flustered that Kasumi had ever seen her.

"Oh no!" she cried, slamming both hands down on the dresser in despair. "I forgot to check if Jack had come back!"

"What?!"

"Jack went out last night, before our dinner…" Kelly's eyes were damp, her lip quivered. "I thought she'd come back and check in after us,"

"What made you think that?" said Kasumi, eyes wide.

"What was I supposed to do, tell her she was under curfew?" Kelly retorted. "Because you'recertainly welcome to try!"

Kasumi held up her hands. "Okay, I take it back," she said. "Call Grunt and Zaeed. Where are those two anyway?"

"Poker tournament," Kelly muttered, dreading where that would lead too. She tried both their numbers with no success. "Dammit!" she hissed. "I'll just tell Shepard she's missing."

"Why don't you call him by his first name?" Kasumi mused.

Kelly wasn't listening. She had to come up with a way to break this news gently. Then the idea struck, and she let out a relieved squeak.

"I'll tell him immediately after sex!" she said, leaving the room and running down the bright corridor.

Kasumi skipped to the doorway and yelled after her. "Again: I don't want to know!"

* * *

**Nos Astra,** **Veus District, Private Docking Bay #15**

Their journey to the SR-2's private location made Gabby wish she'd woken Kenneth a few hours earlier. Ilium was a never-ending torrent of incoming and outgoing sapients, all bearing burdens both physical and emotional, all wearied by travel and all considering themselves special and fully-entitled to exceptional treatment. In short: it was hellon the poor saps who spent all day processing information, ticking boxes and sorting the lawful from unlawful.

This meant that what should have been a routine trip for Gabby and Ken was slowed by several security checks, each more intense and prolonged than the last. Had Gabby dragged her friend out of bed in the morning, they may have slipped by a series of far less irritable middle-men; not yet angered by the day's rigours. After the third round of frisking and questioning outside a police station less than a quarter-mile from Veus, they both realised without any doubt that Shepard and Lawson's displeasure over the Armali debacle was keeping them from sweeping aside Ilium's bureaucracy.

"We didn't even do anything last night! It's the others they should be pissed at!" Kenneth had said to her. Unfortunately, his words were in earshot of an officer, and that remark earned them more trouble.

It was an annoying punishment, but there was an upside to the situation at least; with each wasted moment, Gabby and Ken became more thrilled by the prospect of seeing the Normandy again. No less than three and a half hours after departing from Nos Astra Hotel, they had reached the docking bay by Liara T'soni's offices.

"There she is!" Gabby said, pointing at it like a small child dizzy on sugar.

Kenneth grinned; her excitement was not misplaced. Despite knowing it top-to-bottom, the two of them seldom had a full view of the Normandy. Viewing its armoured exoskeleton in the form of on-ship graphs, maps and data feeds had no real warmth. This was a rare treat.

The regal Normandy SR-2 shone; the most prized and pleasing gem in the rich technological tapestry that was Nos Astra. Gabby and Ken often found afternoon sun had an overpowering and intrusive glare, but its effect on the SR-2 was perfect. Every curve was more pronounced, every colour was sharper. Sunlight pooled over each smooth surface like liquid gold, curling with lambent grace. The duo felt as if previous external viewing of the ship had been through a thick, dirty lens, now lifted to allow full appreciation. This was partially true; hangars on Omega or the Citadel were deprived of sunshine and Cerberus' penchant for mystery made the often joyous occasion of docking and take-off a shadowy affair with hardly anything visible. Drawing closer, they felt a hypnotic sensation; far different from the serene state evoked at Armali Palace the previous night, for this was not brought about by tricks of light and movement creating an illusion of benevolent supernatural forces – this was _real. _This was a work of skill, passion, hard work – it was pieced together lovingly. It was their home; home to Gabby because it was where Kenneth was happiest, and home to Kenneth because he knew it was a place Gabby never wanted to leave. Already they felt themselves yearning for the dark, cool Engine Room, mesmerising Drive Core and vivacious beeps of all terminal tech they had spent years mastering, never far from one another.

The Normandy was several hours into its second day of diligent upgrading. It was surrounded by survey teams. Many of them were lined along platforms suspended on wire before each part of the ship. Gabby and Ken went unnoticed. All of the technicians and engineers were busy analysing, discussing debating, calculating and every so often, descending into shouts. Gabby and Ken yearned to be among them. They imagined with a shared sense of smug satisfaction what Tali would make of this dissention, how she would be correcting and outwitting everyone (and there were several quarians among the teams, looking resplendent in rare white enviro-suits; far more fortunate and affluent than their Ilium-based brethren).

"Looks like they're adding the Thanix first," Kenneth muttered, face creased in concentration. Most survey platforms were hanging by the ship's underside.

"That means our power draw will almost be doubled," Gabby added with a nod. "Looks like you're gonna be best friends with the forward capacitors for the next few months."

"Think you'll ever be able to see any more 'green across the board' with those buggers sticking out?" he quipped, turning to her.

Gabby's eyes remained on the ship, but her smile could not be contained. "Ken, if you think I want to hear one more joke about Miranda's jumpsuit you are sorelymista-"

Her omni-tool beeped. Interruptions seemed as big a part of their lives as breathing these days.

"Oh, look at that, it's from Miranda," said Gabby, examining this new arrival.

"Speak of the She-Devil," said Kenneth.

"Amen," Gabby mumbled. The message opened with another brusque beep. "Oh no!" she cried.

"What, Chakwas still unhappy?" Kenneth asked, remembering the more emotional segment of last night's events.

Gabby shook her head. "No, not this time." Her voice was quiet and high-pitched again. "She'll be okay. According to Kelly she's just been saying how much she misses Jenkins and how nobody in Cerberus is even 'fit to hold his jock strap,' that sort of thing. This is..."

Kenneth stepped forward and saw the message.

_**Engineers Daniels and Donnelly,**_

_**I regret to inform you that Crewman Hadley's older brother – last stationed at John Fisher Corp's outpost on Ferris Fields – has been taken by the Collectors in another surprise attack. Rest assured he will receive the support he needs from myself and the Commander, though we would appreciate an effort from all of you.**_

_**- Operative Lawson**_

Kenneth sighed. "Rupert can help, right?" he said hopefully. "He's no stranger to loss."

Gabby was more worried about Hadley's own peer group. "I do _not _want to know what his friends are gonna make of this," she said. But again, Gabby spoke too soon. Her question was answered almost straight away.

_**Hey guys,**_

_**Took Haddie out clubbing, gonna get him some drunk quarian/asari action - he needs it now more than ever.**_

_**(Lawson and Sheppie STILL think we're locked in our room! Can you believe what a simple looped recording can do?)**_

_**Just tell them we're out. Chill: I'll make our excuses.**_

_**- Matthews**_

Following this horrifying notification by only a few seconds was a message from the Commander himself. Gabby gulped and Kenneth rubbed his arm, feeling a nervous twinge. Emergency messages from the Commander overrode all other endeavours. She opened the file, dreading this one even more than the last two.

_**Guys,**_

_**Would you kindly find those two and bring them back? With Thane Krios' imminent arrival I've got too much on my plate to deal with this sort of thing personally. You'll bump into them sooner or later (it's a 'big' galaxy after all). Who knows? A wild goose chase may even turn out fun.**_

_**- Commander Shepard.**_

Gabby groaned and banged her head on the railing four times. Any other time, Kenneth would have restrained her with a look of worry in his eyes after the first bump.

But this time he was too busy driving his own forehead against the bar.


	16. High

**I'm on Youtube now. Fans of this fic, be sure to check out the 'Urdnot Wrex Rap' courtesy of yours truly.**

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Shepard and Kelly's Room**

"Come on, come on, where is the bastard?" Kenneth growled as he rummaged through a third ornate drawer, still no closer to finding what he needed.

Gabby waited for him in the Entrance Hall downstairs while Miranda lectured everybody else on the previous night's events in a private lounge on the third floor. During their journey back, Gabby and Ken had managed to secure a rented car for the remaining day and night, as Zaeed's most vehement and plausible warnings about Ilium all concerned public transport after sundown. However, completion of the transaction required Shepard's credit chit. Despite being permitted to use it on this occasion, the duo had entered the hotel sure that the Commander himself would be handing it to them, only to learn he was stuck on the third floor with everybody else while Miranda let off some steam.

Kenneth sped up his ransacking, no longer concerned with what ended up broken or misplaced. He needed to move fast. If Shepard or Kelly discovered him it wouldn't be long before the Normandy's Executive Officer caught the scent and moved in with a fresh barrage of sermons on orderliness and etiquette. Gabby would insist on coming along and sharing his sentence if it happened, and he needed to further encouragement to continue falling for her like this.

In the single day spent on Ilium, Kelly hadn't hesitated to make herself at home.

_So many bottles, this woman has! God, she's taken over the bedroom, bathroom, wardrobe, windowsill, every drawer on the bedside table! And the bloody- _

From the other side of the door, a distinctive giggle belonging to the redhead in question stilled Kenneth's frantic fumbling, and a responsive growl from the man she had spent two months sharing bodily fluids with sent him into the tall, decorative wardrobe like a mouse fleeing a cat.

Kenneth didn't quite know why he did it. He would later look back on this event with undying confusion and horror, never able to fully discern his motive. Shepard and Kelly walking in on his raid would have been rather awkward but over in seconds once he'd explained the transactional necessities. He hoped they were just sneaking off for a quick tongue-tying session between duties, but a jittery glance through the keyhole proved him wrong.

Shepard and Kelly appeared wore nothing but bathrobes and their familiar, lusty leers. The Commander was in navy blue, she in a vomit-inducing pink.

_Okay, _he thought, trying to still his shaking limbs, beating heart and ragged breathing. His position was precarious and balance scarce, meaning one wrong move would either have him flying out of the opening door or just bringing the whole wardrobe down, trapping him. Both were inappropriate things to do in the same room as your boss, especially if he happened to be having sex.

_Maybe they're just…off to have a shower_ _together, I could sneak out then. _

Once again, he hoped too soon. Their bathrobes fell, along with Kenneth's jaw and will to live. Under her discarded robe Kelly wore a black, see-through chemise over matching underwear; lacy and floral-patterned, fluttering in a soft breeze coming from the window. Shepard was wearing even less, standing before her in tight black y-fronts. Kenneth screwed his eyes shut, though not before taking a long look at Kelly.

_Eh, not bad. Still, she doesn't have Gabby's legs, or waist, or neck, or skin, or ar-_

Kenneth's eyes snapped open at once, he could have hit himself. What the _hell _was he thinking?

_Oh for the __love__of…_

Opening his eyes again proved no help in this situation, as Shepard had put on a ceremonial Alliance officer's cap, along with a weapon-encumbered sword belt and white gloves. Kelly was sprawled on the bed. Her lips were swollen and her hair dishevelled from the intensity of their kissing. She gazed up at him with lust-brightened eyes and ran a finger over her bottom lip.

Facing the bed, back to Kenneth, Shepard stood to attention (in more ways than one, the Power Engineer guessed, but he wasn't prepared to take a clear look) and saluted.

"Request permission to come aboard!" the Commander said, voice husky.

Kelly licked her lips and examined him head-to-foot. "Do you have clearance, Commander Shepard?" she asked silkily.

Shepard unsheathed the naval cutlass at his side. Despite his growing hysteria, Kenneth couldn't help but admire the gold-wrought hilt, the impressive metallic sound of its unsheathing and the way its plain edge blade caught the room's light.

Kelly appeared less impressed, and shook her head, tutting. "I'm afraid you're going to have to provide a more…_potent _weapon, Commander; something with firepower."

Kenneth squeaked, nearing total despair. _Ohgodohgodohgodohgod!_

Shepard threw the weapon aside and pulled down the front of his underpants. Kelly's eyes widened and an aroused smile spread over her face as Kenneth slapped a hand over his, choking, desperate to stay hidden. Gabby was still waiting, what if she came up after him and discovered…_this? _He wouldn't do that to her.

"Permission granted!" the yeoman said.

Kenneth couldn't take it anymore. It was too much to hope for an early start and finish from Shepard – not with those bloody Cerberus upgrades. Even then he'd have to sit through an hour of the Commander's apologising and Kelly's resentful, insincere assurances that it was 'alright.' He pushed open the door and prayed for a quick death.

True to his estimation, Kelly screamed, grabbing fistfuls of duvet and covering herself.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"she howled.

Shepard, deprived of the chance to grab any bed coverings due to Kelly's erratic actions, had to settle for snatching the cap from his head and holding it over the growing mass between his legs.

"Sorry, sorry, _sorry!" _Kenneth yelled as he dashed towards the door and waved the chit around as if it were a V.I.P. pass granting him voyeuristic privileges. "I just had to get the…" He waved Shepard's chit again, and pointed at it this time. Maybe they'd misheard him? "The…y'know…for the car?" he finished feebly.

"GET OUT OF HERE!"Kelly screamed, pointing at the very door Kenneth was trying so hard to open.

For a seasoned military legend, Shepard was doing an awful lot of transfixed staring. He was doubled over feeling the stings of anger, shock and un-sated desire all at once. Kenneth continued trying to unlock the door with Kelly's endless screams ringing in his ears. It was no good. The central hologram was still red.

Then, after a horrific, overlong moment, Shepard snapped out of his petrification and shuffled, legs together, towards the door.

"Ken, let me get that," he said in a strangled voice.

Kenneth flinched as his Commanding Officer removed both hands from the concealing cap. To his relief, it stayed in place.

And to his horror,it stayed in place.

"Thanks Comman-" he began, before looking down.

The cap twitched.

_Fuck! I am __out of here!_

Kenneth slammed a trembling fist into the holographic mechanism which yielded at once, and sprinted down the corridor, past a rubber-necking salarian janitor, the traumatised human bellboy and a tall man in black leather with his back turned, examining an old Kahje painting. The elevator was a warm and welcoming refuge.

He wondered if he ought to have stayed in the wardrobe filming the proceedings before his inevitable, shameful discovery. At least then he could make some guaranteed money selling it to al-Jilani after Shepard fired him.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall**

Kenneth found Gabby by the main doors leaning against a statue, bored with being surrounded by such primitive items so often. She greeted him with a kind smile. For all the bone-chilling horror he'd just been through, he felt her inescapable pull on him more than ever. Hadley and Matthews didn't possess the presence of mind to rid themselves of the tracking chips placed in their omni-tools, despite proving adept enough to sneak out. Shepard had no problem transmitting their location to Gabby and Ken. They were in a club just outside the district, less than two miles away.

"So are we good to go?" she asked, wondering why he looked so pale and stiff.

Kenneth responded with a mumble and robotic nod.

"What's up Ken?"

"Huh?"

Should he respond with the truth, or take what he'd just witnessed to the grave?

She punched his arm playfully. "Sup?" she queried.

"Oh look," he said, pointing to the outside in an unconvincing attempt to change the subject, "no bug-zapper van turned up."

She sighed and shook her head. "Dammit, I thought they'd called in the exterminators by now."

"Exterminators?" said Kenneth hoping her anger at this would distract from further questioning on witnessing first-degree depravity, "they'll need the bloody Pied Piper of Hamelin at this rate!"

She led him outside to the plaza where a smooth, electric-blue car awaited them, parked by a white marble fountain.

"Not bad, huh?" she said, tapping the bonnet. "Serrice-made, T'Maya Series, though I'm sure most of these are actually just overpriced rip-offs of quarian engineering." She examined it further. "Should handle well despite its reputation for stalling, I'd say it's-"

By this point, Kenneth would have joined in with her musings, unless something was wrong.

"I take it by your silence, you…_don't _want to drive this thing?" she said.

Kenneth didn't respond. There was a faraway look in his eye, he wringed his hands.

"Look Ken, if you don't like the car, you could just say!"

"Well, uh," Kenneth droned, glad to see yet another new topic arise. "That was the first rental car place we contacted. It's not like we need to make such a snap decision."

He was talking nonsense and knew it, but forming words helped his brain filter out all the unforgiving images of Shepard and Kelly.

Gabby frowned. "It's the best place that could do us a deal on such short-notice. And yes, we _do _have to make a snap decision."

_Need to keep arguing, can still see Kelly's horndog face…_

"It just seems a bit…"

"What is it about the car you don't like, Kenneth?" she said, getting more agitated by the second. "Is it the colour, lack of legroom, what?"

"I never said I didn't like it!" he responded. "I just think we could get a better deal. You don't have to say 'yes' to the first offer that floats up, you gotta play the market. Does fulfil all our needs? Does it have multiple uses? _These _are the questions you've got to ask."

"We're rescuing a couple of idiots from certain death, not picking up the kids from skyball practice!" Gabby snarled.

Kenneth raised his eyebrows.

"It was a…_hypothetical…_y'know." She started wringing her own hands, before softening at a new realisation. "Something happened upstairs didn't it Ken?"

He looked down at the plaza's intricate mosaic.

Gabby sighed. "Get in, tell me all about it," she said, squeezing his arm then opening a door. "It's okay."

He took the front passenger seat, closing his door. She was right; he didn't like the lack of legroom, or its garish colour, but there were more pressing matters at hand.

"Lemme guess," said Gabby, starting up the engine and wearing another warm smile. "You walked in Shepard and Kelly?"

"Well…they kind of walked in on me," he admitted.

Gabby grimaced, "you mean you were looking for the-"

"Yeah."

"And you heard them comi-"

"Yeah."

"So you hid in th-"

"Yeah."

"Sorry you had to witness that." She leaned over, placing her hand on his and squeezing. This did nothing to help Kenneth's nerves. She then transferred the car's fee using Shepard's chit and the car took off, soon joining one of many streams of traffic sprawling over Nos Astra.

Gabby's grimace re-emerged and deepened at the thought. "Shepard and Kelly's room," she whispered, both awed and creeped out. "I bet their bed's got calluses on it."

Kenneth snorted, but couldn't laugh; that observation was a little _too _close to the truth.

"Careful," he muttered as Gabby exited a tunnel and swerved by a salarian-driven taxi, earning several honked horns and obscene shouts. "Gotta stay in first gear when dealing with tunnels," he added.

"I'm being careful, Kenneth!" she trilled. "And I'm also aware of the rules regarding tunnels!"

"You almost hit that guy."

"No, healmost hit me."

"Turning coming up," Kenneth drawled, blank-eyed; speaking as if he hadn't heard her.

"I know Kenneth!"

_He wants to keep talking so he doesn't have to think about Shepard and Kelly, poor bastard _Gabby thought with mixed feelings of empathy and annoyance.

"These things are easy to miss," he grumbled, now defensive. "You can't always rely on satellite naviga-"

"Ken, I'm very sorry you were walked in on by Shepard and Kelly but _please _don't think it means you can criticise my driving!"

"Just a suggestion, Gab."

They bickered all the way to their destination.

* * *

**Nos Astra, Arla Street, Club Canopus **

"I told you we should've paid a valet!" Gabby barked as they stormed into Club Canopus under watchful krogan bouncer eyes.

Drifting around a parking lot for twenty minutes, all the while missing spaces due to bickering had worn away what little patience remained in both of them.

Kenneth remained defiant. "Fifteen credits? Not likely!"

The club was similar to countless others that made up Ilium's vibrant night life; crowded, smoke-filled, constantly changing the colour of every wall, and divided into sections accommodating both drinking and dancing. After the grandeur of Armali, entering a den of such loud music and lewd conversation was a rather dizzying experience for Gabby and Ken. But, jolted as they were, the duo noticed no other humans.

"You here for those two?" said a sullen krogan bouncer from behind them. He pointed a green finger at a bar on the room's farthest side, where Hadley and Matthews were seated.

Gabby nodded. Kenneth muttered "yeah" under his breath.

"Good," grunted the krogan. "Saves me having to toss their asses out myself, I'm not gentle. I may even spare you two if you do it for me. _Now."_

Half a dozen empty glasses in front of Hadley explained his slumped, near-unconscious state. Matthews, drunk but still able-bodied, edged his stool towards a pair of female quarians who judging by their stiff backs and frequent twitches, were far from interested in continuing to interact with such lecherous humans. A scantily-clothed asari bartender watched the four of them with curious contempt.

"Got this scar in a knife fight with a krogan last night," Matthews purred, running a hand along the cut rendered almost invisible by medi-gel. "You should see _his _face!"

"That's…interesting," said one the quarians, no longer able to back away without leaving the bar's vicinity. Her friend was too frightened to say anything.

"I'mma cut to the chase." Hadley leaned forward further and wiped some beer from his lip. "Y'ever been with a human before?"

"You don't have to answer that!" the bartender interjected.

Matthews jerked his drink-addled head up. "That's impolite! Saying that without even introducing yourself!"

"You're not getting my name, that's for sure," she stated.

"Don't matter," Matthews countered, leering. "Long as you know _my _name. They call me Eternity, because I can last all night, wanna embrace me?"

She slapped him.

"Ooh!" he breathed, rubbing a sore cheek. "It's okay, it's okay…I'd be mad about it too."

"Mad about what?"

"Mad about the fact that no one'll see your eye colour again when we're done!"

She slapped him.

"Wow, that's gonna give me a black eye," he said, still not giving up. "And I could turn your azure eye midnight blue!"

She slapped him.

"That's not how you smooth-talk!" Hadley shouted, watching the disastrous exchange. "You gotta say it like this." He turned to the quarian girl again. "You've never been with a human before, and I can tell."

"How?" she said.

He slapped his chest. "Because once you go levo, you ain't goin' back, ho!"

Her friend gasped, sickened. Matthews mistook it for envy.

"S'alright, baby!" he said. "When Haddie fails, I'll take both of you: I'm ambidextro!"

He snorted and pounded a fist against the bar, amused at his own devious wordplay.

"I'm getting security," said the bartender, emptying a drink over each man's head and marching off. The quarians imitated this action, no longer afraid.

"Our amino acids may be incompatible!" a dripping-wet Matthews shouted after them, "but our fates aren't!"

Gabby and Ken's arrival couldn't have been timelier.

"Hey you," said Gabby, trying to sound casual as she gripped Matthews' damp arm and yanked. "Looks like we're heading back." She tugged again.

"Hey!" Hadley boomed, trying to focus his eyes on her, "looks whose here to join the party!"

"What kept ya?" groaned Matthews, sounding like a man determinedly holding back vomit. Gabby hooked his right arm round her shoulders and hoisted him up.

Kenneth tapped Gabby' back, there was a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh, you know us," he said to Hadley. "We couldn't find a speeder that we really liked. With an open cockpit and the right speed capabi-"

"Ken, please!"Gabby cried, trembling under Matthews' weight.

"Alright; thought it might lighten the mood," he moaned.

"Hey Kennybo-bo," Hadley slurred. "Y'ever pissed in one o' them toilet troughs that go inwards from both sides? The ones in public toilets? What I like to do to relax, right? Is…it's _really _satisfying when you piss straight in the hole in the middle, ain't it? I'm like 'yeah! Fuck you laws of physics! Fuck you Isaac Newton! Look at me! I don't gotta wait for my urine to slowly drain, I go _in _the drain!' Cool huh?"

Many times, Kenneth had secretly enjoyed the sensation of peeing straight into the hole when using a public men's room, but this was neither the time nor place. And such things were not said in the presence of a woman you desired. He ignored the question.

Their exit didn't go unnoticed.

"Who were those two?" said a turian greeter who didn't appreciate being ignored by incoming patrons.

His asari boss only shrugged. "I dunno, I can't really tell human ages, but I'm surethey were picking up their kids."

* * *

**Nos Astra, Arla Street, Club Canopus - Parking Lot**

"Remind me, where were we parked again?" Gabby huffed as Matthews' feet began dragging on the ground.

"What?" Kenneth said. "I thought you knew!"

"Me? Didn't I tell you not to forget where we parked?"

"You might have said mentioned it, buried somewhere in the avalanche of criticism!" he retorted.

" 'Avalanche,' there you go again with the exaggeration!"

"You were driving the car! You should know where it is!"

"Oh, I _was _driving? You'd never have thought it from your commentary!"

"I saved us fifteen credits!"

"You wasted twenty minutes!"

"I'm not in the mood Gabby!"

"Fine!"

They wandered around in another embittered silence. It took a further fifteen minutes to find the car, and now physical fatigue was setting in, worsening the already sour mood.

"Ugh!"Gabby grunted as she flung Matthews into the back seat. "If brains were dynamite this guy couldn't blow his nose!" She sat the technician up and tried to fasten his seatbelt without getting too much drool or alcoholic beverage on her hands.

Kenneth placed Hadley in the adjoining seat. "Wish it just wasa night of taking the kids to skyball practice."

"You wanna drive this time?" she said, with hands on the hips and ice in her voice.

Kenneth shook his head and got in the front passenger seat once more.

"Ooh!" Hadley moaned, "Sheppie's gonna kill me isn't he?"

"It…won't be so bad." Gabby's attempt to sound assured was abysmal to even her ears. "Sorry about your brother," she added.

"I'm sorry too. And Shepard knows, he won't be mad," Kenneth said.

"That Shepard…" Hadley slurred, "I may be drunk and all but still…he's fuckin' _beautiful! _He'll always be beautiful. And you guys are great, too. Even though you haven't yet admitted you want each other."

"Okay," Gabby chirped, abruptly starting up the engine and taking off. "Time to go."

Kenneth turned away from her, pretending to admire the city beneath.

In their embarrassment and anger, Gabby and Ken failed to notice Matthews lighting up something from his personal stash.

* * *

**[VIEWING: KellyGrrrl – Inbox]**

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Re: Why haven't G+K returned?

No idea, no new messages. Let's go ourselves.

* * *

The rented T'Maya was parked by a disused tunnel. Hadley and Matthews slept in the back while Gabby and Ken pondered the meaning of life, and whether or not a synonym for the word 'thesaurus' existed.

"Ke…Kenneth," said Gabby through the thick smoke cloud. "Why does the song say 'potions in a travelling shoe?' It's kinda weird, don't you think?"

"Well," said Kenneth, deciding to stop examining his palms, "what else rhymes with 'do'?"

She furrowed her brow. "Can't think of anything."

Kenneth nodded. And nodded. And nodded. And nodded.

"Ken, you're making me woozy!"

"Sorry, I forgot to stop nodding. It feels good, only my brain might fall out."

She laughed when spotting him through an opening in the cloud. "Your hair is so _pretty! _I'd touch it but…it's like silk, and mum said you shouldn't touch silk with dirty hands."

"Your hands aren't dirty, Gab," he said, bemused. "And your eyesare pretty.

"Everything's pretty," she whispered, looking out the window. "Especially the air! There's like...bubbles in it. I feel like I'm trapped in bubblewrap or something."

"I know what you mean," he sighed, nodding another twelve times.

"Gabby?" he asked after the stilling of his head, "where does the toe tag go on dead person without feet?"

She shrugged. "Ask Shepard. He knows this sorta stuff."

Kenneth sent a message.

Gabby groaned, curling up in her seat. "I'm scared Kenneth!"

"Wha- _why?" _he gasped.

"I keep seeing the band," she whispered with terror in her eyes. "And..."

"And?"

"And...they're playing different tunes to the ones I want! That's..." she rocked back and forth, her voice rose an octave. "That's horribleKenny! Why would they do that?"

"Playing different tunes?"

"Yeah! It's like...life's all controlled by _them. _And we're like...a bunch of lunatics...and they're trying to control us and keep us on the path, but we wanna play on the grass and they're like 'STOP!' Y'know?"

Kenneth shook his head. "No."

Gabby giggled, trying to find a rhythm in her rocking back and forth. _"The lunatics are on the grass," _she sang tunelessly.

"That's...that's a _good _lyric Gabby!"

"You think so?"

"Yeah I do. You should...you should totally write that down before someone else does!"

"But why would there be thunder in my ear when my head explodes?"

"Ask Shepard," Kenneth squeaked gleefully, trying to impersonate her voice. "He knows this sorta stuff."

Gabby laughed and sent a message.

"Y'know my mum wanted me to be a diplomat?" she said. "But what if right…you had to go to Nigeria, and the guy on the phone actually said 'the Niger area,' and you went to Nigeria by accident? I don't want that to happen! Who wants _that _to happen? I could never let that happen! That's the end of us! Anarchy! That's almost as bad as the band thing with the lunatics."

"I could be a diplomat," he said, feeling a surge of pride.

She chuckled. "R-really…why?"

"Becau- ooh that's shiny!" He pointed at a car going by. "Because if we were ever at war with spiders, I could, um…I…um."

"What would you do?"

"I'd…" He stopped, pressing both hands into his leather seat. "This feels like a krogan skeleton someone left in vinegar for a few days!"

"What about the spiders, Kenny?"

He looked around frantically. "What spiders, _where?" _

"In the war."

"War?"

"Yeah, the war you said-"

"Oh right. What I'd do is…" He paused again, enjoying the moment. "I'd make people put little ladders in their bathtubs, so if a spider got stuck in the bathtub, he could climb out no problem."

"Why would that stop a war?"

"It's like a diplomatic solution," he said.

"Oh."

They took a few moments to admire their surroundings. The swirling smoke was a very nice touch. It reminded them of something. Something bright...and swirling...they couldn't remember.

Gabby ended their session with a loud laugh. "Who calls a gang the _Blood Pack_?" she said. "Sounds like a feminine hygiene product!"

"Gross, but...yeah."

Silence fell, and the two sat still for almost half an hour, watching Ilium's many pretty lights.

"Hey Kenneth," said Gabby with a stupid grin. "Our names are 'Gabby and Ken!' That's…" She broke off, chortling _"…funny!" _

Kenneth ceased his intense examination of the patterns of traffic and chuckled. "Yeah I get it…" His brow furrowed. "Wait, no I don't why?"

"Our names…right?" She stopped, taking her turn to stare at the pattern of flying cars before shaking her head and snapping out of it. "Our names sound like _Barbie and Ken!" _she yelled, breaking out into insane cackles.

Kenneth's blank face didn't crease. "I don't get it," he deadpanned.

"Neither do I," said Gabby. "But still…" she giggled again, resting her head on his shoulder. "Kinda familiar."

"Kelly should give Shepard a Lord of the Rings cake for his birthday," said Kenneth with another gleam of inspiration in his daydreaming eyes.

Gabby turned towards him, burying her face in his shoulder and let out a muffled snort. "Why?"

"Because it's an ent-icing thought," he said. "Get it?"

"No."

"It means...doesn't matter." He let his own head rest on hers.

Why did his body heat up when she was near to him like this?

_I hope I'm not on fire!_

He tried to open the door and get out, but was feeling sleepy. You weren't supposed to fall asleep if you might be on fire! In his last moments of strength, he typed another message to Shepard.

_Trust. Fire is all about trust. There are three letters in 'fire' that are in 'friend.' Wait...__four.__That's every letter in 'fire!' That's..._

They were drifting...drifting...

With an uncharacteristically loud grunt, Kasumi pried the car door open and was enveloped by a billowing, contraband cloud.

"Well, isn't that sweet?" she said, coughing and waving a hand as Kelly spluttered behind her.

A sleeping Gabby was draped over Kenneth, mouth open, drooling into his chest. Kenneth was doing the same in her hair.


	17. Rivalry

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Gabby and Ken's room**

Gabby awoke to a throbbing headache, smarting eyes and no recollection of what had occurred the previous night. Even with both eyes shut she couldn't stifle the sting, and clenched them further, seeing the bright red flesh of her eyelids. It was daytime, the sun was shining in this room and a window was open, letting in occasional sighs of wind. Which room was this anyway? She shifted, feeling the pleasant softness of a bed; their bed. Kenneth's scent still clung to the sheets. She smiled at this and rolled over, forgetting all pain and doubts. She then reached out to drape an arm over him and hoped he'd remain oblivious to her caresses for another morning.

But Kenneth wasn't there. Her pain flared stronger. The room was empty, and she was still wearing yesterday's clothing but…_why? _

_Something about Matthews or Hadley, wasn't it? And a car…and a lunatic?_

Gabby groaned and slapped a hand over her searing face as the truth returned in all its humiliating glory.

_My career is __over._

She'd screwed up. She hadn't done her job, she hadn't kept Kenneth safe…or the other two men, but it was kind of hard to really feel bad about that. Her pain and confusion turned to anguish.

_Where the hell's Ken?_

The familiar beep and slide of the door opening flared in her sensitive head like a shrill alarm. Kenneth entered looking shaken but thankfully not injured or ill. Her relief was too great to express. But were the two of them still even part of this mission now? Or had their Commanding and Executive Officers finally found something to agree upon?

_Maybe Ken could try sexual blackmail based on the recent events he's witnessed. At least to get his own job back, he doesn't owe me anything._

"It's alright," he said, sensing her worries and defusing them. He sat at the foot of the bed, smiling. "We're still employed."

Delirious laughter escaped her. "How'd you talk them into keeping us?" she asked when it lessened.

Kenneth shrugged. "Didn't have to," he said shortly. "Shepard isn't even back from his newest outing yet."

"What? Why?"

"Between taking Kelly out, tracking down Jack, bailing out Grunt and Zaeed, avoiding Conrad Verner, making appointments with Liara and some new arrangement with Miranda, I'd say he's not gonna have enough time to deal with us."

"And Miranda?" she asked.

"Grounded Mathews and Hadley here. They don't seem to mind."

Gabby felt a twinge of guilt. Had she been gentle enough with the grieving technician?

"How is Hadley?" she said.

Kenneth dropped his voice to a respectful hush. "Hadley remembered what happened with his brother as soon as he came to. He's still really down. The new guy, Krios is speaking to him now. He's very helpful."

"Yeah?" Gabby didn't expect _that _from a reputed assassin. "What do you think of him?"

Kenneth grinned. "I think Matthews and Hawthorne have a new man-crush. Anyway, you gonna come downstairs or just keep asking questions?"

Gabby frowned at him, sitting up at last. "I'd better shower first, and…" she reached for the bedside table…"do something about this head," she added in a bitter undertone.

Kenneth threw the pill bottle into her lap. "I owe you for yesterday," he said sheepishly.

"Thanks." She unscrewed the cap and dry-swallowed two bitter white spheres.

"That's trusting of you," he chirped with another impish smirk. "I didn't think you'd still be okay with being offered drugs just like that."

"I'll take it, as long as you're the one giving it to me," she muttered.

Kenneth's eyes lit up, and only then Gabby realised the horrible implications her words had carried. She sprang to her feet and sped past him into the bathroom.

"Shower!" she trilled upon arrival.

Kenneth courteously waited, staring out the window and trying hard not to think about what she'd just said, or what was going on in the shower. As Gabby showered, she tried hard to not think about him thinking about what was going on in there. She took less time than usual, haphazardly drying her dark brown hair into a stringy mess and slipping on a _Live in Pompeii, 1979 _top…before discarding it for something tighter, brighter and lower cut.

"You wanna go to the ship nowthen?" she asked, wearing a determinedly cheery smile and glad to see his eyes flutter below her neckline for a moment.

Kenneth's expression soon turned uncomfortable. "Actually I've…" he rubbed his neck. "I've already been up there."

"Kenneth!"

"I'm sorry!" he said, holding up defensive hands. "It's just that…you've been out for hours and according to Mordin that was really strong stuff. I didn't want to-"

Gabby shook her head. "It's alright," she said softly. "I shouldn't be so-"

Her head gave its most painful throb yet and she slumped into the nearest armchair with a small yelp.

"I'll bring breakfast up to you," said Kenneth.

"Kenny no! I'm fine!" she protested. She tried to get up, only to fall back, thwarted by another vicious throb.

Kenneth stopped in the doorway. "Get to your feet and I'll believe you," he challenged, arms folded.

Gabby sighed. "I can't!" she hissed.

"Alright then." He turned to leave.

"Ken wait! Can you at least help me up? I got to sort my hair out."

"Looks perfect to me," he muttered without thinking.

Gabby beamed, but held her hand out nonetheless. A blushing Kenneth stepped forward and took it, squeezing perhaps more than was needed.

But the helpful pull didn't come; both just stayed there, unmoving, staring into each other's eyes. Gabby gave him a nervous smile and brushed a thumb along the back of his hand. He returned the caress.

"Ken?" she said, throat dry.

He pulled with a sudden surge of strength and urgency. Gabby yelped again and almost collided with him. They stood face-to-face, inches apart.

"Be careful," he whispered. "Never know what's next on this bloody planet."

"I'll be okay," Gabby whispered back. She jerked her head towards the door. "Now hurry up; you know how cranky I get without breakfast!"

Kenneth chuckled and left her alone.

The Power Engineer's departing footsteps were all Kasumi needed to hear, and from the confines of her bedroom she hit a switch, disarming the cloaking device.

It appeared suddenly in the corner of Gabby's eye. She flinched instinctively at first, but upon focusing her attention, she felt nothing short of awe.

A miniature model of the SSV Perugia was now gleaming from the bedside table. Gabby approached it on shaky legs, still feeling painful pangs but astounded by the ship's detail. It was just as she remembered it: a ship that personified the ethos and ability of the Alliance Navy; an illustrious construct, immaculately-crafted and physically imposing yet at the same time possessing a regal elegance. In its heyday, the Perugia had struck fear into every sworn enemy and lifted the spirits of every ally. Memories flooded back to her, most of them good, one of them heartbreaking.

_Kasumi's work, _she thought, remembering the now deactivated cloaking device. A tiny note was tucked into an exhaust port, and sure enough…

_**Gabby, **_

_**I won't tell you to stop refusing help, I won't claim this is really my business, but I will say this:**_

_**Use this thing wisely. You know what I mean. **_

_**- Kasumi**_

_**P.S. Keep the dress and shoes. **_

Gabby pocketed the note, and instantly wrote her own.

_I wonder if Kasumi left a note for the guy she stole it from. _

Gabby looked around frantically. Where could she leave this thing where Kenneth would find it, and nobody but? She picked the gift up and held it over her head. It was lighter than it looked, and caught the light with effortless poise.

"Gab!"

She jumped in surprise, almost dropping the item.

"What's that?" said her best friend, entering the room behind her.

"Nothing!"she said, cramming it into the bedside drawer with more speed than she had ever considered herself capable of.

"Right…" said Kenneth slowly. She turned to face him, beaming madly.

"Breakfast's over, I take it?" There was still a terrified sharpness in her voice.

"Yeah, we'll get something on the way to the ship," he said. "What've you got there?"

"Nothingyouneedtoseerightnow."

"Huh?"

"I said," she began, before deciding against pursuing this subject. "What's going on downstairs?"

"Grunt and Zaeed are back." He shrugged. "I didn't pick up many details; something about a guy's arm sockets. Matthews did the usual routine of almost pissing himself when he saw Zaeed. Anyway…"

He suddenly took on the appearance of a child with a brand new toy, and produced a minipad. "Look what I swiped from Hawthorne!"

She grinned and joined his side, taking a curious look at the pad. "What exactly is- oh my _god!" _

"Yep," said Kenneth proudly. "Complete list of inter-species pick up lines! Let's start with…" He cycled through the options. _"Asari…"_

* * *

**VIEWING: **_**Many Aces in Many Holes**_

**Asari:**

'What a coincidence…I have some blue pills.'

(If she's a virgin) 'Don't you think it's time you gave up your blueberry?'

**Batarians:**

'I can blind you in all four of them!'

**Drell:**

'The love I have for you is not measurable on any scale'

**Hanar:**

'This one will hear you screaming its soul name all night long.'

**Krogan:**

'If we hook up, I might get arrested for recreating the Horde.'

**Quarians:**

'Open your docking bay and prepare to be boarded!'

'Your people reallyknow how to download…but how would you like to down a load?'

'Pull the suit down, and I'll suit up!"

**Salarians:**

'You may have only 40 years, but when we're together; time itself will stand still.'

'High metabolism? Good; you'll need it to keep up with me.'

**Turians:**

'How'd you like you face covered in something other than paint?'

'It won't be first contactfor me baby!'

**Volus:**

'How'd you like to go up on me?'

'If you think you're breathless _now...' _

'Ever been to a clan-bang?'

* * *

Gabby and Ken lost all track of time as they gleefully went through every last one, laughing, spluttering and groaning until their throats were sore and legs weak. When reaching the end, they collapsed into the same armchair, Gabby on top of Kenneth, too shaken by merriment to really care.

"I've got something too," Gabby choked, dismounting him before the moment could sink in.

_Screw it, _she thought, _I may as well do it here. It'll be just as awkward._

Kenneth got to his feet, feeling a strange nervousness wash over him. "Wow!" he gasped when seeing what was in her hands. He accepted the model, reverentially holding it like he would a new-born child. "Gabby this is…_thank you!_"

Gabby wringed her hands when freed of the load. "There's um…there's something I think you should…"

He withdrew and unfurled the new note.

_**Kenneth, I'm giving you this because it reminds me of you.  
It's sturdy, it's pretty easy on the eyes  
…and when I look at it, I'm filled with pride and great memories.**_

Kenneth looked from Gabby's neat handwriting back to her magnificent gift, then back to her. Her eyes were wide with expectant fear. How could he repay such kindness?

Kenneth acted before fear or doubt could surface. He leaned forward, ignoring her wide eyes, her intake of breath, and kissed her cheek. The moment was as brief as it was wonderful. Her skin was soft and supple; _perfect. _He took in the closeness of her body, the scent of her hair, the feel of blushing skin, the-

And then Kenneth came crashing back into the real world, and true to his cowardice, ran from the room. "Gotta go!" he yelled over his shoulder. "Can't come with you to the ship, I've got things to do."

He reached the elevator wondering how much money he could spare for a gift of equal calibre. Or if he would ever find one. And how he could follow up that 'gesture' of thanks.

Gabby was left in the bedroom with a sagging mouth, paralysed limbs and heart pounding so fast she feared a sudden end. It was a few moments until she regained use of her own body. She placed a hand on the spot he had kissed.

"_YES!" _she cried, pumping a fist into the air and leaving the floor. Kenneth had never done anything like that before. Maybe her recent efforts hadn't gone to waste; maybe he _was _becoming attracted to her. Maybe taking stupid risks wasn't so stupid.

Then again, it may have just been an innocent gesture of friendship she was reading too much into. It was too early to celebrate. Well she _was _celebrating, but that didn't really matter. She opened her eyes.

…and wished she'd picked a better time to celebrate.

Tali was standing in the doorway, staring at her. How long had she been there? Had she seen the kiss? Or just what appeared to be a random outburst of unprovoked joy? Had Kenneth even noticed her when running for it? Damn that helmet and the smug facial expression it may or may not have been hiding!

"Tali! I mean _ma'am! _I…I was…" Gabby's head flapped about on a rubber neck, trying to find a door. "I was just…" At last she spotted one, right behind the quarian she didn't want to converse with again.

"Leaving?" said Tali neutrally.

"Mm hmm," Gabby squeaked, nodding like a confessing toddler.

"I won't keep you, then."

Gabby walked out with as much dignity as she could muster, muttering her thanks and slipping out of sight when the opportunity arose.

Despite that momentary humiliation and the indisputable fact the Tali would soon catch onto her feelings, Gabby wasn't quite done celebrating. She resumed her round of childish grinning, hissed _'yesses' _and fist-pumping in a deserted women's bathroom, before finally completing the proper arrangement of her hair.

Kenneth had kissed her, actually _kissed _her. It didn't even matter that he didn't want to accompany her to the Normandy. She skipped down the hallway, en route to her favourite ship. They had the rented car for a few more nights, and better than that; there were still no exterminators in sight!

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall**

Her spirits may have been higher than they had been in years, but Gabby was in no mood to answer any questions about last night's events in Club Canopus and beyond. To her relief, Thane Krios' arrival seemed to be keeping everybody else occupied. When reaching the ground floor, Gabby was able to slip past her returning shipmates with relative ease. But on her way to freedom, she caught some intriguing conversation, stopped, and hid herself behind an antique statue.

"Jeez, give it a rest you two!"

It was Goldstein, and Gabby had only heard her use that tone of voice when addressing-

"Why should we 'give it a rest?' No one else seems to mind!"

Sure enough, Matthews was already on the defensive over his newfound hero worship.

"Actually, I happen to mind quite a bit," Gabby heard Patel say. "And I'm sure he would too. It's creeping everybody out."

"And just what exactly is creepy about it?"

This time it was Hawthorne on the defensive. Gabby wondered if he resented being left out of last night's debacle.

Patel answered his question. "Because neither of you have shut up about him since his arrival here? That might be it," she said.

"We all know you're just scared of him!" Matthews retorted.

"And that's not unhealthy, considering what he does for a living," she said evenly. "It doesn't' help that he's not warmest person I've ever met."

"Is that supposed to be some kind of amphibian-related crack?" he queried, voice trembling with amusement.

She hissed icily at this accusation. " 'Amphibian-related?' " She paused for a moment, before continuing. "Oh; warm/cold blood, very mature. And to answer your question: no_._ You're the only one making the offensive jokes."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"That…old vid comparison you two keep bringing up."

Hawthorne chortled. "There's nothing offensive about that observation. Even you have to admit he doeslook like Kit Fisto, only without the dreadlocks…and in leather."

Gabby fought to restrain her own amusement. If only Kenneth was with her to debate this point.

Goldstein made a rather pitying noise. "That's one of the stupidest things you've ever said," she muttered.

"Yeah!" said Matthews. "He's way cooler than Kit Fisto!"

"Get the fuck out of here!" Hawthorne snapped. "Can he endear himself to generations of sci-fi fans with nothing but a force push and a smile? And…a really unnecessary CGI seires?"

"And an undignified death scene that was totally uncalled for considering his popularity," Joker added.

"Yeah, I was getting to that!" said Matthews. "And I never said Fisto wasn't awesome, I just don't think he could take out a whole room full of mercs without Nassana Dantius noticing."

"Dude, he's got the force!"Hawthorne barked.

Gabby heard Matthews stop. "How would biotics fare against the force anyway?"

Hawthorne stopped with him. "I think a quasi-pantheistic energy field sustaining all life would probably be able to override your average biotic."

"Thane's not average!" Matthews said, sounding disgusted at this point. "That doesn't matter anyway, he could just snipe Fisto."

"Kit would sense it from miles off!"

"Like he could 'sense' a motionless Sith Lord standing right in front of him, brandishing a lightsaber?"

"You never even answered my first question! Could Thane endear himself to generations of sci-fi fans with nothing but a force push and a smile?"

"And a cartoon, depicting him fighting underwater with stupidly over-exaggerated powers?" Matthews added.

"Fisto didn't need the spinoff, he was already a legend!" said Hawthorne angrily.

Gabby peeked out from behind the statue and saw Matthews square up to his adversary. "It's an unfair question; Thane didn't seem like the kind of guy who has a lot to smile about."

Goldstein, Patel and Joker decided to proceed without their bickering colleagues. Gabby herself casually strolled by the enraged duo, unnoticed, and glad of it.

* * *

**Nos Astra,** **Veus District, Private Docking Bay #15**

On the irritatingly long, arduous journey to Docking Bay 15, Gabby could only think of Kenneth's kiss. Why didn't she give him gifts more often? And why hadn't she bothered to kiss him before? (In a conscious state, at least) God knows he'd earned plenty of them; three years ago he'd won her heart. But whether he even wanted to do anything with it remained a mystery to her. Thankfully, she now knew just what to do in the event of him turning up later on with _any _store-bought item no matter how high or low its quality.

_And I owe Kasumi big time._

Gabby took a different route than last time to the SR-2, boarding a tech team platform from a lower floor that was slowly pulled up to the ship's underside, where the teams were still installing its new guns, piece-by-piece.

"You're right Ken, I could never have made Power Engineer," she muttered, picking up a nearby datapad and looking at a graph detailing power draw issues that needed fixing.

"Hey!" came a female voice from the platform overhead.

Gabby looked up and saw a typically gorgeous asari maiden in a tight, white jumpsuit smiling down at her. Before Gabby could ask what she wanted, the maiden leapt over the ledge and landed before her, barely making a sound as she did.

"Hi!" said the asari, straightening, beaming and holding her hand out. "You must be Kenneth's friend.

Gabby had no idea what had prompted this, but shook the hand. "Yeah…and you are?"

The asari's beautiful face fell slightly. "He didn't mention me?"

"No," said Gabby with a smile that didn't come close to reaching her eyes. "He didn't. Not a word."

_What in the blue hell is going on here? _

"Guess I'll have to try harder next time then."

"What do you mean?" said Gabby without letting a second pass.

"Oh come on!"said the asari with a patronising smile. "He is _so _cute! And funny! I wish I was working with a guy like him!"

"Uh huh," was all Gabby could manage as her blood boiled.

_The phrase 'no shit Sherlock' springs to mind._

This went unnoticed. "Anyway I- oh! Where are my manners? I'm Enetha," said the asari, touching her sternum as if Gabby couldn't see who she was referring to. "Nice meeting you."

"Yes," said Gabby slowly, still wearing a stony smile and trying to calm the beating of her heart. "Nice meeting you too."

_I don't like you Enetha. I don't like you or anything about you. _

"So is Kenny not with you? He said he was coming back later today."

"Oh did he?"

_Don't you dare call him that, only __I__get to call him that!_

"He said he was gonna give us a hand with installation if we encountered any more problems. Thing is, we have." Enetha's face fell again. "He was really sweet too, not the kind of guy who'd go back on his word."

Gabby fought to control her breathing.

_Yeah he sure is! But when was the last time Kenneth kissed __your__cheek, fuckface? _


	18. Orwell

**Nos Astra,** **Veus District, Private Docking Bay #15**

Kasumi watched from her precarious perch, high above the curved silver and black crow of the Normandy. She felt a strange tension, little-known in masters of thievery. Gabby must have met Kenneth's newest admirer by this point, and she wondered why no yells or catfight-inspired wolf whistles could be heard.

As Kasumi's curiosity turned to worry, Gabby emerged from the Normandy's underside, sooner than expected. Her movements were hurried and stiff-backed. Her head was hung, fixated on the glowing panels of the floor. Kasumi saw her take a sudden, undue interest in brushing dark brown hair out of her eyes, and recognised this as a means of hiding tears that only men could fall for.

"Guess you know how it feels Gab," she murmured sadly. "Just try not to act like Ken would."

Deciding this was enough to form an accurate conclusion, Kasumi slid down the lamppost and cloaked when hitting the floor of one of many verandas overseeing the SR-2. When reaching a satisfactory swathing of shadow, the thief switched on her omni-tool to contact Kelly.

The yeoman's answer was more delayed than usual. "Yeah?" Kelly panted, sounding breathless and flustered.

Before Kasumi could pass on her troubling news, Shepard's groggy voice came blaring out. "Who is it baby?" he said moaned, yawning.

Kasumi grimaced and held the tool further from her ear as if it were infected with something. Kelly began to answer him, only to be cut off by her lover.

"Tell him to piss off! I don't want to negotiate any more skycar insurance deals!" he thundered.

"Googleybear, be quiet!"Kelly hissed, before adopting her usual cheery tone. "Who is this?"

"It's me," said Kasumi, stifling a laugh.

"Oh."

Kasumi heard a ruffle of bed sheets as Kelly moved. Shepard groaned in protest. "What? I'm not finished yet! You can't just climb offme just cos your tool's gone off!" Kasumi heard him shout, now further in the background.

The words following this were muffled, as Kelly seemed to have slapped a hand over her device. The only words Kasumi regrettably caught from her friend were _"…my fault…upgrades?...three minutes ago…yourself off!...getting sore!" _

"Is this a bad time?" Kasumi snapped.

"No! It's – _not NOW Cuddlesticks! – _it's fine. What's happening, is Jack loose again?"

The next sound Kasumi heard could only have been Shepard storming into the bathroom to finish off solo. She tried ignored this and considered Kelly's question. "N- well, I'm not sure about that really. It's Gabby."

"Is she still sick?"

"Guess again."

"What,Kasumi?"

"Don't get tetchy!" Kasumi retorted. "I'm trying to tell you that Gabby just came down here to the ship and found out that Ken…has got a new, blue friend on the Thanix team."

Kelly gasped and the pitch of her voice flew up. "Oh my god! Does this mean he's not actually interested in G-"

"No," said Kasumi, annoyed by the feeling of Kelly's infectious panic. "Not exactly. But this new girl seems really taken with him." She sighed. "I can't bring myself to – you know – interfere? She's nice, sort of. I don't want us to just break her heart."

Kelly clicked her tongue, considering their options. "And Gabby?" she said.

"Looked ready to explode," Kasumi said. "She's heading back now. Good thing I bugged the car."

"Oh god," Kelly groaned, "we can't just throw this girl out, it'd be…unethical, right?"

"We've already done some pretty shady things for this wager," Kasumi replied. "Besides, what did you thinkwe were going to end up doing?"

"I dunno…locking them in linen closets and pushing them out to sea in a boat? Something like that."

"We need to come up with a workable plan. I'll talk to you when I learn more, bye."

She switched off her device, not before hearing Kelly moan at the sudden sensation of having her neck kissed.

"I'll be happy for you and Ken, Gab," said Kasumi under her breath. "As long as you don't turn into those two."

* * *

_It's his choice. His. I have no exclusive claim of any kind on him, _Gabby told herself for the fifth time as she exited the facility.

She felt trapped. Her whole body shook. Why hadn't he told her about Enetha? Was he waiting for the right moment?

_Deal with it girl: you could have had him…two years ago. You can't any more. _

She was shaking, her rage divided between the asari and herself.

_And even if you had any right, how the hell could you even compete? _

She reached the car and collapsed into the driver's seat, feeling as if she'd run a marathon. She could feel tears coming but held back as strongly as she could. She would not cry over this again. The last time they were in here together she'd been bitching away at him. No wonder he didn't want her.

Gabby grasped the wheel, but felt no desire to leave. She didn't want to face him and had no idea what to do with herself now. She slowly bent forward, resting her forehead on the wheel.

"He kissed me," she whispered.

_He had to. It would've been rude not to. You gave him an expensive gift, it's what friends do. Doesn't mean he has to swoon just like that._

A sharp knock on the window caused her to flinch horribly. Her nose slammed into the horn, setting it off.

"Gabby?" The voice outside was muffled but recognisable enough.

Gabby hurriedly tried to hide her face, its muscles shaking from the growing effort required to keep another gallon of tears at bay. She must've look so ugly. She tried to open her door.

"Don't go anywhere you!" Goldstein opened the corresponding door and sat next to her.

Gabby turned away. "What are you doing here?" she said, voice still thick with misery.

Her colleague chuckled. "I work on the ship too Gab, wanted to see how it's doing," she said.

Gabby nodded, still turned away.

"Gab…" Goldstein reached out and touched her arm. "I know what just happened, I saw it," she said softly.

"Saw what?" Gabby asked

"Saw that little exchange," said Goldstein.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Gabby snapped.

"Stop denying it Gabby. There's _nothing _good about suffering in silence. You're torturing yourself."

"I don't know whatyou're talking about," Gabby spat, instantly regretting it. Why was she still pretending with Goldstein? Or anybody but Kenneth on the Normandy for that matter?

"Gab, come on! It's been obvious since day one! When are you two going to stop pretending there's nothing there?"

"Well…whe-" Gabby's breath was ragged and desperate, she felt more trapped than ever. "I d-" She was hyperventilating, bright red in the face. Anger was more useful in this situation.

_Might as well take the non-existent moral high ground here._

"I can torture myself if I want!" she huffed, eyes still on the cruel world outside. "What are you going to do, call Amnesty Interstellar on me? I can-"

Gabby couldn't contain it. She broke down, shuddering and sniffling.

Goldstein lightly touched Gabby's shoulder and turned her around, seeing despair written all over her face.

_"__Gabby." _She leaned in and hugged the other woman.

Gabby was still shaking. Everything boiled under the surface.

"He loves you," Goldstein whispered into her ear.

"He doesn't."

"He _adores _you."

"I don't believe that."

"Yes you do."

"Well there are no grounds for it! I'm not rational!"

"Gab…" Goldstein gripped her tighter. "Tell me the other side of the story,"

"Wha-what?" Gabby sobbed.

"You told me how you fell for Ken," said Goldstein.

"No I didn't!" Gabby cried, still unable to control the pain. "You asked about…Marlowe and-"

"And you ended up spilling the story of how you fell in love."

Gabby felt Goldstein smile against her neck. She didn't challenge this assertion, and Goldstein took this as permission to continue.

"When do you think it started for him?"

"I don't know!" she cried. "I don't even know if he has!"

"The rest of us do," said Goldstein warmly. "You've been together so long…he musthave."

Gabby shook her head. "These aren't exactly things we talk about."

"Why not?"

Gabby managed a laugh and broke away from Goldstein's embrace. "It's awkward. Same reason we don't use your first name."

"Get in the back and lie down," said Goldstein in a manner leaving no room for argument.

"Why?"

"That was Omega-brand Tarak-O you inhaled last night, you'll be tired and nauseous for hours." She frowned and examined Gabby concernedly. "And there's this…blue, busty blow you're just suffered.

"Blow?"Gabby clenched her teeth. "I am _not _letting that woman win!"

"Win?"

"You know what I mean!" she huffed. "I don't give up that easily."

Goldstein opened her own door and stepped out into the sun. "But you stillhave some nasty drugs still coursing through your body." She walked around and opened a backseat door. "Don't underestimate that sort of stuff. Last time I tried it I almost threw myself at Hawthorne."

Gabby shuddered. "Okay, I see your point," she sighed after considering this.

"Just don't get any unsavoury ideas from that story!" Goldstein said with a chuckle and pointed finger. "You'll want to remember your first time with him!"

"Golda please! Enough jokes about it!" Gabby moaned.

Golda Goldstein's smile faltered at the utterance, but got the message. "Backseat Gab, come on," she said firmly.

Gabby groaned and dragged herself out of the driver's seat and into the back with a moody reluctance she had not exhibited since the morning of her fifteenth birthday.

"Where to?" she muttered when slumped on both seats, Goldstein at the wheel.

"Doesn't matter," said the other woman. "We can go anywhere we want, but I'm keeping you away from starships and asari."

"This is Ilium," said Gabby, sulking. "Good luck with that."

Goldstein's face was optimistic. "We'll find a way," she said. "I resisted Hawthorne's charms, didn't I?"

The two women took off into the multi-coloured majesty of the sky.

As the car joined a glittering snake of traffic, Gabby found herself gently nodding off, lulled by the residual drugs, the breaking of her heart…and a certain memory.

"_When do you think it started for him?" _

"_I don't know! I don't even know if he has!"_

She had lied. She sort of knew, well: guessed at least_. _If Kenneth truly had fallen for her at any point, it would have been around three weeks after Captain Gregory Marlowe's final visit to the Edmonton Campus.

* * *

**Alliance Academy of Engineering Technology, Sagan Hall, 2181**

"Kenny?"Gabby moaned wearily, waking from a pleasurable dream.

He'd been on her mind an awful lot lately. Since Marlowe's departure, both of them had been enjoying a wave of attention beyond what their prodigious talents usually gave. Not that she cared much for that. The important thing was their positions were safe for now. Deep down even the staff knew of Kenneth's involvement, but Marlowe had proven too busy to press a full investigation. That and the fact that nobody liked him enough to try.

But what made her happiest was Stephanie's admission that the Simulator debacle had been entirely her fault. Gabby had accepted the blonde's apology before her dismissal and departure from the campus was finalised.

She yawned and rubbed her eyes in the blue-tinted darkness of early morning. There was a sharp ringing in her ears. It took a few moments for Gabby to realise the ringing sound was coming from her omni-tool, discarded in her bedside drawer. The time on it was four thirty-three. Her heart leapt as the memory returned. The disorienting feeling of being so suddenly woken faded. Kenneth must have received the results.

_Oh god no! Kenneth…tell me it's good news!_ _Please!_

She opened the new message with shaking hands. All tiredness vanished.

_**- Gabby,**_

_**Surgery failed. Dad's gone. Don't come over, I want to be alone. **_

_**Ken - **_

The response came to her straight away.

_**- Does anyone else know? - **_

_**- No. - **_

_**- I'm going over there Ken. -**_

She switched her tool off before he could respond. The next few minutes were a blur: Gabby threw on whatever clothes she could lay her hands on in the still-dark room and slipped out, running barefoot through the corridor so her steps would go unnoticed. She was familiar enough with the building's layout to navigate without lighting, and her achievements had granted her access to most of the campus' facilities – meaning most restrictions after lights-out were waived. When reaching the downstairs exit she pulled her boots on and swiped her ID card on the door.

Even in summer, the night air carried a strange chill. She broke into a run, keeping her ID card aloft to satisfy a top-notch Alliance surveillance system.

_I'm coming Ken, please don't do anything you'll regret! _

The journey lasted far longer than usual, even at her frantic pace. She barely even noticed the huge Nikola Tesla memorial statue, shimmering softly in the moonlight.

After completing the vast course of twists, turns, card swipes and password entries throughout the west sector of Edmonton Tech, Gabby reached the deGrasse Tyson Building, short of breath and sick with worry.

A lonely bedroom light shone from the second floor of an otherwise grey sea of windows.

_Ken's room…_

Gabby stopped by the sealed double doors. She wasn't quite sure what to do, having never been in such a predicament.

_Just do something, __anything!__He needs you to stand by him, even if he doesn't know it. _

She took a deep breath and opened the doors. Three weeks ago this man had risked everything for her. She could never repay his debt, but would have a great time trying.

Gabby removed her footwear again and tiptoed inside through reception, the waiting room, canteen, past the lecture theatres, offices, several bathrooms and the locked Flight Deck Simulator. She took the stairs, as such a route would lessen her chances of waking anybody. Even Kenneth would resent more attention at this point. The stairs ended at the first floor; one of five devoted to accommodation.

Her pace slowed. Kenneth was right at the top of the next flight. If she could just reach him, everything would somehow-

A long, tanned, muscled arm stopped her. She stifled a yelp.

"Surprise, Miss Daniels!" The voice was deep, husky and dreadfully familiar.

The obstructing man switched on a light, and Gabby realised she was stood just outside the men's showers, stilled by the arm of Cassius Rose: a man as handsome as he was arrogant; dubbed the 'Male Sorenson' by his intellectual superiors and sexual inferiors alike. Cassius towered over everyone at Edmonton, and was never above flexing his muscles, tanning his always brown skin, showing off tattoos, enjoying the view from a nice mirror, jogging in revealing attire by the women's dorms or running a hand through his long, black locks.

Gabby had never had any time for 'heart throbs,' and due to recent events, probably never would. Yet even she couldn't stop her blush from flaring up once her eyes had adjusted to the light.

He had clearly just finished another marathon of early morning beauty treatment; shower included, and was now wearing nothing but a scandalously short white towel. Every muscle glistened, (almost) every brightly-coloured tattoo was on display. Beads of water trickled from his hair down those plentiful, toned abs...

Gabby shook her head and pushed the arm away. Despite this aggressive action, she saw a smile on his face when looking up. Cassius' eyes were blue and always bright. Too blue, really: they were nothing like Kenneth's unique brown. They didn't have anything of Kenneth's warmth, or jocularity in them.

"Like what you see?" he said, leaning back against the shower room entrance. "I can tell when girls are looking, you know."

"That so?" she snapped, backing away further. This was such a pointless exchange: she needed to get to Kenneth, and Cassiuswasn't going to get a damn thing from her.

"Gabby, I'm a straightforward guy." He ran a hand down his body. "All you have to do is ask. I'm right here, and my room is very close."

Anger bubbled up inside Gabby, her jaws locked together.

"What?_"_ she forced through clenched teeth.

Cassius had spent months rampantly bedding every girl dumb enough to give him a chance, but had never shown any interest in her. It was just as well, as Kenneth would have surely caught the scent. In a protective elderly brother manner, of course; she wasn't eager to get her hopes up.

He laughed in a most patronising way and lifted a thick black eyebrow, lips curling into a leer. "Am I gonna have to spell it out? I'm saying that...if you request to see what's beneath the towel, you can have it." He finished this gross statement with a wink.

Gabby snorted. "_If it fits beneath a towel that small you can fucking __keep__it! _

Tempted as she was to voice her thoughts, she held them in, as angering him would only wake more people.

"Don't be embarrassed!" he said, likely mistaking her amusement for shyness. "I can show you how a _real _man does it. You'll never-"

"Cassius! I have more important things to do right now."

It was his turn to snort. "Donnelly?" he chuckled.

"Yes," said Gabby curtly.

Cassius furrowed his brow. "So...you're off to do Donnelly?"

Gabby's blush flared up again. "No!" she hissed, "that's not what I meant! And besides, I didn't think I was your type."

This comment threw him off the unsettling trail of her feelings for Kenneth.

"Oh, don't be so sure," he purred. "Your deep voice and general abrasiveness puts a lot of guys off but…I think you're pretty cool."

Gabby folded her arms, disgusted. _The 'disarming compliment' _she thought. _How stupid does he think I am? I bet this is just a damn bet! Kenneth would never be this cruel. _

"Y'know Gab, for someone with 'more important things to do' you've spent quite a bit of time talking to me. Which tells me you have time to kill, which tells me you're gonna be here for a while. And-"

"Wow, are you always this logical?" said Gabby sarcastically.

"And," he said, pretending she hadn't interrupted. "It would be most impolite of me to let you pass through here without uh," he motioned to the loose towel, "exploring the lowlands."

_Time to call his little, conceited bluff._

Gabby smirked and leaned in, looking up into his eyes and standing on the tips of her toes until their eyes were locked and her lips were an inch from his. Cassius' face lit up with lusty, triumphant glee. She reached out and firmly gripped the towel. His whole body tensed and shivered in anticipation.

Gabby leaned in closer. Her smirk turned to a leer. She licked her lips. "I prefer the Highlands," she whispered.

Cassius' smile vanished. "What do you mean b- OW!"

She swept a leg underneath both of his, shoved him to one side and marched past. Cassius fell into the bathroom, desperately trying to keep the towel on; a tangle of limbs and linen.

"Little _bitch!" _

Not caring what kind of enraged retaliation lay behind her, Gabby flitted through the corridor and up the stairs, finally arriving at Kenneth's room.

The light was still on, and she heard laboured breathing coming from inside. He was crying, or at least close to.

"Hey!"she hissed, rapping on the door. "It's me!"

"Go away," he groaned.

"Let me in!"

"I said no!"

"Why not?"

"This is my thing Gab! It doesn't have to involve you!"

"It doesn't, but it will!"

"Gabby, you don't need my misery in your life."

"Ken, we're a team. Don't make me recite the oath."

"There is no 'oath!' We're just contracted to each other!"

Gabby's voice faltered. "There is to me," she whispered.

He sighed. She heard him get up out of bed and stagger across the room.

"Kenny," said Gabby patiently, "what would you do if our roles were reversed?"

"I'd…" Kenneth grunted, cornered by the question. "I'd probably break down the door and crush several of your ribs in the hug that followed."

"I know," she said. "But sadly, my feeble female body has its limits." She thought of Cassius. "At least where the door breaking part is concerned," she added.

For a moment it seemed he would open the door. Gabby heard his hand scrape gracelessly over the lock. Yet seconds later he slipped away.

"Gab…" he sounded close to tears again. "I've-"

"Got nothing to be ashamed of," she finished. "Now," her voice turned stern, "you know better than to try a stand-off with a stubborn woman, Kenneth Donnelly!"

He opened the door.

Gabby leapt into the room and threw her arms around the quivering, broken man before her. The word came to her lips like a prayer.

"_Kenneth…"_

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Fifth Floor, Thane Krios' Room**

"Done and done Mr Krios," said Kenneth airily, wishing Gabby was around to handle formalities like this. He stood up and stepped back, observing the room's new settings on its monitor by the door.

A deep, clicking rattle of a voice responded, causing Kenneth to wince.

"You have shown a true mastery of machinery Mr Donnelly. I've never seen anything quite like it. And please: just Thane. I make the crew uneasy enough, it seems."

Kenneth laughed, still nervous. "Don't be so sure. You've got plenty of admirers."

Adjusting the temperature and humidity of the Thane's room had been Kenneth's first time alone with him. After the uncomfortable realisation that he had seen everything the monitor had to offer, Kenneth turned to face the drell.

Thane Krios was an impressive specimen indeed. At first, Kenneth had been reminded of Kasumi: a silent-moving figure forever clad in the colour of night, lacing an effortless swiftness and proficiency into actions performed as mundane, everyday duties by the less gifted. And he supposed such comparisons could still be made, but after spending some time with Thane, curious and previously untested differences became apparent. Kasumi seemed to perform every theft and speak of every kill with a never-ending fluctuation between careless nihilism and childish joy. Thane Krios was marked by a meaningful fatalism; unable to withdraw sincerity or purpose from any action, be it a kill, prayer or bite of food.

Of course, there was no doubting the fact that Thane's appearance accentuated these truths. A black depth was found in his eyes, which were physically dark – and to the casual observer cold_. _But those able to see past their double-lidded amphibian construction found a bastion of experience, wisdom and odd warmth. Thane's healthily green skin, webbed fingers, maroon-ribbed neck and the back-turned curvature of his skull distorted features that were intrinsically human. There was enough familiarity in his physiology to establish a trusting drell/human rapport (as it was with the asari) but Thane's subtle differences promised to new acquaintances a worldview or sharing of words not found in other humans, or any other species for that matter. Like the rest of his kin, Thane had arrived with the valedictory mystique of a near-extinct species. This added to the already imposing air created by his profession, mannerisms, religious convictions and the calmed acceptance of his terminal disease.

"I believe we first met yesterday afternoon?" said Thane, somehow managing to look even more thoughtful in the dim amethyst bedroom. "You seemed to be in a hurry."

Kenneth remembered spotting a mysterious figure in black leather, lost in a Kahje relic as he had put as much distance as possible between himself and Shepard and Kelly's carnal carnival.

"Oh…that was you?" Heat spread over his face. Krios was nerve-wracking enough without making him remember such things. "Yeah," he rubbed the back of his neck and looked around idly. "Yeah I remember."

After a long, terse silence, Thane's face broke into a smile and he stood up, walking to the wall left of his four-poster with that fluid swiftness that drew so many eyes to him.

"Again, I thank you. With the completion of the room's settings, I can finally settle and personalise."

The drell opened a trunk on his bed and pulled out what looked like a snow globe. It was dull and forgettable. Several pieces were chipped off.

Kenneth held back an incredulous noise that would have bordered on a laugh had it been allowed to leave his mouth. He'd been expecting something more stirring than an item that was ten years too out of fashion for even an Omega gift shop.

Kenneth's restrained mockery must have shown on his face, as Thane addressed the anti-climax straight away.

"Doesn't make much of a first impression does it?" he said, placing the little orb on his tall, lilac bedside table.

Kenneth shook his head, and sensed another oddly convenient Gabby-related lesson marching in the direction of their conversation with ill-deserved confidence. He almost flashed back to Zaeed's 'man-to-man.'

"It is my _Eissun," _said Thane proudly.

Kenneth raised an eyebrow. "That's what it's called?"

The drell chuckled and raised a webbed hand. "No! Your first assumption was correct: it is indeed a cheap, store-bought snow globe." He looked at it again. Adoration flickered in the deep black of his eyes. "But to me it is not 'just' an anything."

"I don't understand."

With great effort, Thane looked away from the item and out the window. "An Eissun is a gift. A bridge of friendship and love connecting two people in such a way, death cannot end it."

His eyes went back to the globe, and then to Kenneth, who shivered. "The Eissun is worthless to anyone except to whom it was originally meant. It has not real monetary value, it does not look or feel spectacular. To casual observer it is just…junk."

"This has something to do with that painting, doesn't it?" Kenneth asked.

Thane smiled and nodded once more. "Come," he said.

The drell led Kenneth out into the corridor, before the colourful relic. "This was painted on Kahje, two centuries ago, but I still find it a respectfully accurate depiction of the Rakhana creation story."

Kenneth leaned in. He had never examined this one closely. The painting was dominated my an immense, almost apocalyptic tidal wave, dotted by over a thousand sharp peaks of water forming smaller waves within. Moonlight peeked from the top right corner, casting a shower of shower of silver over the dark blue storm. Kenneth moved in closer, and noticed that the further out his eye travelled, the darker the water became. He let his gaze crawl inward again. An unorthodox pattern in the bursts of light and sharp peaks began to emerge: they melded into a tightening spiral, further and further in until-

"Ah!" he exclaimed.

Thane nodded beside him. "Very good. Most don't see it the first time."

Kenneth pulled away and gave himself a few seconds to recover before diving back into the stormy depths of the picture. He had been quite dizzied. It felt as though he'd been hurtled back through time and space to very scene of Rakhana's creation. At the wave's core was a minuscule fleck of gold. Even when squinting with his eyes less than an inch away, Kenneth could still only discern vague black lines within.

Thane pulled a small looking glass from one of his pockets and held it over the black-lined gold. Magnified in the middle was an outline of what could only have been a female drell in sweeping robes.

"Sireen," said Thane reverently.

"Who?" Kenneth couldn't take his eyes off the figure.

Thane straightened, taking the glass away as his long arms returned to their usual, formal position behind his back. Kenneth looked expectantly at him.

"Engineer Donnelly, what you have looked at is the forging of the first Eissun. The figure in the middle is Sireen: one of the angels of Arashu, Goddess of Motherhood and Protection. Sireen had three sisters: Sera, Angel of Music; Sirus, Angel of Dancing; and Siha…" Thane's rasp dropped to an awed whisper…"The Greatest Warrior Angel."

"Your personal favourite, I bet," said Kenneth before he could stop himself.

"Indeed."

"What was Sireen the Angel of?"

Thane's eyes misted over again, becoming lost in the depths of silver, blue, black and gold.

"Free thought, freedom, _scepticism_ if you will: the first created being with total freedom.

Kenneth had heard this before. "She didn't 'fall' did she?" he said as the corner of his mouth curled.

"No. Arashu gave Sireen life to see if love and devotion could come about willingly. She succeeded, but still, Sireen proved something of a thorn in her side. Sireen's heart was pure and her faith genuine, but she strayed from many of her assignments. She challenged Sirus with new dances, baffled Sera with strange, new music and disputed Siha's tactics."

Thane smiled again. "Sireen and Siha were unlike in many ways. Sireen's eyes were the colour of sunrise; Siha's eyes were sunset-coloured." He shook his head. "Anyway, as Kalahira, Goddess of Oceans and the Afterlife laid the waters upon the world, she noticed Sireen, who enjoyed meditating by the waves. Sireen amused Kalahira, and decided to test the Angel's devotion to Arashu. Kalahira created an Angel of her own: Sireon. Sireon was a free thinker as Sireen was, designed to be her mate. Sireen abandoned all duties for Arashu and spent all her time with her new love. Arashu intervened, declaring that Kalahira had violated her bounds by creating Sireon. After much dispute, as the two Angels walked the entire world together, Kalahira gave in. Sireon was taken from the world and buried in the afterlife via the ocean. Before he left, Sireon told Sireen she could find him one day; the key to his prison lay in a single pebble."

"A single pebble?"said Kenneth.

"Yes," said Thane solemnly. "She had until the end of the world to find it." Thane turned away from Kenneth with his head hung low. "Just imagine it. A pebble. They are beyond number. They come in many kinds in many places. As mortals came to cover Rakhana, she searched in secret, day and night. A pebble means nothing to you or me. We cast them aside, we wade through them carelessly. But to her, they meant everything. Imagine her pain and frustration as drell after drell treated them with disdain, hid them, and destroyed them."

"Did she succeed in finding him?"

Thane's face changed. He was harder to read than ever. "Well, as you know, my planet has died-"

"Oh god sorry!" Kenneth gasped, backing away. "I should have remembered, I didn't mean to-"

"It's quite alright," Thane said. "To answer your question, I don't know if she completed her mission. Some say she found him just before the end, and that they drifted together in the waters once again before departing for the Afterlife as one. Others say her lonely form wanders empty space, longing for him. All that matters is this: she tried. Sireen fought day and night for so many years. She never gave in."

Kenneth could see the question coming.

"Do you have an Eissun, Engineer Donnelly?"

"Yeah." Kenneth certainly had one, and he wasn't thinking of the Perugia model. "I should go," he said suddenly.

_Damn Shepard and his contagious mannerisms!_

"Of course," said Thane with a courteous bow. "I must schedule another talk with Mr Hadley. Grief is a battle nobody should face alone."

"I realise that now," Kenneth blurted out.

"Sorry?"

"Nothing."

Kenneth wanted to continue the conversation; Thane seemed more trustworthy than anybody else on their mission, but Shepard and Kelly's moans had resumed and were growing louder by the second.

Kenneth headed back to the room he shared with Gabby, fell to his knees by the bed and reached for his trunk. It clicked open. With a smile, he pushed through a myriad of folded clothes datapads. It was right at the back, in its safe haven, hidden from curious eyes and perfectly preserved in its container. Kenneth did not dare pull it out for a look. He wasn't ready to share it with anyone. But he was familiar enough with it. He had delighted in it a thousand times.

It was an Eissun given to him three weeks after Marlowe's humiliation, and mere hours after a brain aneurism had ended his father's life.

Kenneth had very little recollection of what had happened upon letting Gabby in his room. An overindulgence of his alcoholic contraband stash and lack of sleep reduced the memory to a pained haze. Several hours later, after she had put him to bed and left, as the Alliance transport arrived, he discovered a hastily-written note in his pocket.

"_**The English are not happy unless they are miserable, the Irish are not at peace unless they are at war, and the Scots are not at home unless they are abroad"**_

_**- George Orwell**_

Beneath was an addition of her own.

"_**Marlowe is not content unless he shows contempt, Sorenson is only fulfilled because her head's empty, Cassius wouldn't have depth even if he had girth."**_

Kenneth laughed maniacally at this addition, but there was more written below. His heart almost stopped. Something new; something very unlike amusement yet endlessly more wonderful was born in him.

_**As for Kenneth Donnelly…**_

"_**The advancement of power engineering will never arrive until he's back from leave, he feels grief but his heroism will save many from it, Gavin met his end knowing Ken's prime was only beginning." **_

_**- Gabriella Daniels**_

Such simple words, utterly useless to anybody but him. Since that moment, Kenneth had known without a doubt that he loved her.


	19. Games

**Nos Astra Hotel, Third Floor, Breakfast Lounge**

"Hey Sleeping Beauty," said Patel brightly as Gabby shambled into the sapphire and indigo tiled room, rubbing her forehead and groaning. She was getting pretty sick of being surrounded by such ostentatious shades of blue all the time. The room's, smooth, well-polished surfaces, lit up by shafts of morning sunlight were doing nothing to help her drink-addled head either.

The lounge was a strangely quiet and peaceful place this morning, considering its occupants. Rolston, Patel and Goldstein were at the large, central table finishing off decadent meals never seen outside Ilium. Joker sat alone, by a window and Matthews and Hawthorne were playing cards in a far corner, attempting to impress Grunt and Zaeed, though this would never happen until they moved from betting sugar packets to actual prize money. The oblivious mercenary was busy showing his equally oblivious krogan protégé the fine art of killing a man with a cocktail stick – without spilling his blood and leaving evidence. Zaeed's lessons were as zealous and uncompromising as ever, despite the two's recent, lengthy battle with Nos Astra's less than friendly gambling community and Grunt's resulting wounds; some of which were still knitting. Matthews' terror of Zaeed was fading, but to the worry of everyone who actually cared (and their number was few) a strange desire to earn the aging mercenary's approval had surfaced.

Joker's boredom at being struck groundside was showing more than ever: he waved around a sausage pierced by several breadsticks while making exaggerated space ship noises, eventually crashing his vessel with a pleasant splat into an open jar of marmalade.

"You really can't handle the drink, can you Gab?" said Goldstein as she started a new crossword.

"Hmm?" Gabby mumbled. She wanted her head to clear quicker; it was hard scanning the room for a certain redhead while so badly hung over. "Where's Ke- Hadley?"

"Kenneth left for some 'fresh air' about two minutes ago," said Patel. "Hadley on the other hand, has renounced his Fratboy ways, and is doing paperwork." Patel's voice rose with each word: she still couldn't believe it. "He's been up since six, if you must know."

"Wow," Gabby croaked. She was too used to accidentally letting Kenneth's name slip out to be embarrassed, yet even in her dizzy state, she had not expected this from Hadley.

"Yep," said Rolston as he logged onto the morning news feed from a minipad, "the guy said 'life's too short to piss away behaving like a kid' or…something to that effect. Gotta respect him for it."

Matthews and Hawthorne made synchronised, disapproving noises from their secluded corner.

"Don't you complain!" Patel snapped at Matthews while Joker's Sausage-R2 lost a wing and went on a collision course with a stick of butter. "All you did was put him in danger!"

Matthews reddened and opened his mouth to respond, but faltered under her gaze. After a few tensely wordless moments, dominated only by the sound of Joker's ship coming to a violent end, the technician threw up his hands as if he hadn't played any part in that disastrous night, and left the room.

"I'm grounded, stop complaining!" he barked, sticking his head through the doorway after another uncomfortable silence, before disappearing again. Hawthorne looked, disappointed at the unimpressive heap of sugar sachets, before deciding to join his friend.

Gabby's head and general sense of misery – averted only temporarily by her night out with Goldstein, who must have dumped her on the bed beside a sleeping Kenneth – meant she wasn't quite up to the task of tolerating any more raised voices, and with Grunt and Zaeed in the room this was always possible. With another, more resigned groan she slipped out of the lounge, unaware of the three concerned looks exchanged at the central table.

"You wanna go after her?" said Rolston in a carrying whisper.

Goldstein had been respectful of Gabby's privacy over the unfolding Enetha debacle, mentioning only a new asari on the Thanix team that had engaged the Power Engineer in conversation, but the Normandy crew were a sharp bunch, and it didn't take long to connect the dots between Kenneth's recent scarcity, Gabby's misery and a long night on the drink.

Patel shook her head. "I'm more in favour of just locking them up together until the 'big confession.' This has become nothing but ongoing torture for no reason."

"Yeah, that'll work," said Zaeed with a grim nod, interrupting Rolston's response. He passed a now sharpened gravy ladle to Grunt before continuing. "Sleep and light deprivation, close confinement, no guarantee of when you'll get out…I've never seen it fail. 'Cept for this one guy, back in seventy-eight. One-eyed batarian, if you've ever heard of such a thing. Anyway, he'd arranged a two-for-one hit on this couple from Terra Nova, and it turned out they-"

"Zaeed!" Goldstein trilled. She was the only one brave enough to interrupt the demented monologues these days, even though she appreciated the weight lost by their appetite-killing power. "We're not that desperate yet. _Thanks._"

Zaeed merely grunted and resumed his lesson. "Now, to get this thing into the jugular without causing too much of a mess, you have to…"

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Third Floor, Virtual Entertainment Centre **

At first Gabby had headed to the elevator, hoping to steal another hour of sleep and delay the moment when she'd have to face Kenneth in the light of his new little blue 'friend.' But the room had become off-putting; it was where they had fallen asleep hand-in-hand, where Kenneth had actually kissed her, where Kasumi had left gifts so thoughtfully and generously. With this in mind, Gabby's attention had switched instead to the VEC.

She was glad to discover this room was likely the dimmest and quietest place in the entire hotel. It was an irritating blue, just like everywhere else, albeit a dull and dark one. A silken breeze fluttered over her face from an unseen, open window. Her mechanically-oriented instincts soon led her to the room's dominant power switch, and one click later, a miniaturised version of Nos Astra's nightlife sprang into being; a brash and overstated shower of colourful light, some flashing, some static, many changing too quickly for the human mind to track.

Once again, the decadence of Nos Astra Hotel astounded her: this room held just about every entertainment outlet in the known galaxy. Gabby recognised many vid and game simulators and sensory stimulators, all adapted to the physiology of their respective species.

Glowing consoles…weirdly-shaped controllers…endless menus and ads popping in and out of existence, all vying for her attention in their loud and intrusive ways…

Her head began to hurt again.

For the first time in her life, Gabby wished she had developed more hobbies outside the area of engineering, or at least some that didn't involve Kenneth. Time always slowed to an agonising standstill during every shore leave; and not even all the extranet's content could provide the adequate method to waste it away. A nasty leakage of Quantity Consequence 3 spoilers was keeping her off the Autoware Social Network, and she vowed to keep away from Skyedge until things were put right between the two of them.

"Hey," said the man she was trying to avoid, hidden somewhere in the ostentatious maze.

"Kenneth?" Her physical pain subsided, and far more frightening feelings returned. She heard him move at a brisk pace, every footstep becoming louder.

"You lost too?" he said.

She chuckled and hit the switch again. Gentle blue darkness ruled once more, and there was Kenneth, marked by signature signs of sleep deprivation that were so well known to her. The lids above his brown eyes appeared as if they were being held up with a great deal of effort. Short red stubble covered his otherwise colourless cheeks.

"Hello there," she said, realising she'd been holding in a breath.

They were standing several metres apart in a long, mostly empty chamber lit by nothing but what little sunlight could poke through an afterthought window on the far side. Kenneth tried a tired smile, and for a second looked burdened by every pressing sadness one could feel without admitting to.

"What's up Ken? You look-"

His laugh was sudden, forced and very uncharacteristic. "Aren't you going to ask how the great Kenneth Donnelly ended up getting lost in a room devoted to technology?"

She gifted him with her bravest attempt at a smile. "Same reason as always: Power Engineers are overrated."

Kenneth responded with another hacking laugh, stifled by the resulting yawn. His right arm looked crooked, bent behind his back. He then swiftly stepped towards the room's only solid objects: a small pile of deactivated speakers in the nearest corner, placed in a haphazard pule beneath a vestigial mantelpiece.

"I've err," he coughed, "I've got some news."

Gabby's half-smile vanished. Her breathing halted again.

"You know I've been spending some time around the ship, and you weren't there with me last time, so you may not have heard."

Feat unlike anything Gabby could have imagined coursed through her; every nagging doubt and repressed dread took centre stage; this was it. Another woman had noticed Kenneth's unmatched worth and – unlike her – had actually acted on it. Gabby hadn't been this afraid on the Perugia, she hadn't felt this useless when facing Marlowe's fury. Kenneth was going to tell her about Enetha.

"I've…I've been talking to some of the guys and girls on the engineering team and – you're my best friend so I think you should know-"

_Don't cry Gab, _she growled internally. _Just wish him good luck and walk out. Use the lost omni-tool excuse, that one always seems to work._

"…turns out our worst fear has come true," he finished.

"_Whah?"_ was all Gabby could manage.

"Yeah," said Kenneth solemnly, eyebrows raised in concern. "We've fallen _way _behind on gaming world updates. Those grease monkeys on the Thanix team looked at me like I was actually a managerial or something, I shit you not!"

The shock still hadn't left her.

"You'd better believe it!" Kenneth continued, mistaking her catatonic state for outrage and swelling up with annoyance again.

Gabby moved closer to him, and saw that his arm was crooked from an attempt to conceal something.

"So…" he sounded sheepish again. "That Perugia you gave me – which is amazing, I must add – got me thinking and…"

_Oh my god, he's been getting a gift! _She could have cried, or kissed him, or both. _He's not a two-faced bastard! He's not a two-faced anything! He has one face; and it's beautiful, and it's kind and it's…_

"Ilium to Gabby?" Kenneth sang, knocking three times on her forehead. "You still there?"

Gabby flinched at the flush of pleasure brought on by his touch, before bristling at his strength. The time had come to make another swift, on-the-spot decision. She closed the remaining gap between them, raised her head and moved in to kiss his cheek, revelling in the sweet opportunity to return his favour from the previous day.

But a coincidental turn of Kenneth's head placed her kiss a few inches left of its destination: in the corner of his mouth. She felt him twitch from an attempt to pull back, but held her ground, lengthening the kiss far beyond the friendly norm, before finally pulling away from his burning face.

After a few seconds in stupefied silence, Kenneth spoke, and Gabby got a look at what he had been hiding. In his hand was not anything that could have been called a conventional 'gift'; it was a simple minipad. In the centre was a flashy logo – one that took her right back to their Tech Academy days.

"Sorry, I," Kenneth's voice had gone hollow. "I wasn't out buying a…y'know…gift? Well, at least not an exclusive one. Uh…sorry if I sound-"

"No, no!" she protested.

Kenneth smirked, regaining his confidence. "I guess that was a wasted kiss then."

"Nah," she said before common sense could stifle her, "If anything that one was overdue. I'd say you earned it."

He opened a grinning mouth, before closing it again. Gabby was smiling, and finding it hard to maintain eye contact, wondering how well the room was concealing the redness of her cheeks.

"So what've you got there?" she asked for the sake of easier conversation.

Kenneth hit the logo, starting up a new gamer profile. "That Perugia gift, and talking to the guys at the ship got me thinking about all the stuff we used to do together on shore leave, or whenever Old Man Drummond gave us a moment's peace."

He drew back with hands upheld, as if he had somehow offended. "Now I know things are different and that this is a really, really important mission. But…with all the polish ingestion and desecrated paintings and drugs and creation myths, it'd be nice if we could-"

Gabby cut him off by placing a finger over his lips. "Kenneth: I would love to."

He smiled under the finger, and she withdrew her hand.

"What was that about creation myths?"

"Nothing."

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall**

Kasumi was surprised to find out Kelly had beaten her to another new development in their mission, and was already in the Entrance Hall waiting.

_Maybe I really am slipping, _she thought. _I should be sharper than this. _

She frowned; Jacob's continual denial of both his feelings and abundance of free time sure wasn't helping.

Samara's arrival at Nos Astra Hotel was imminent, and it turned out the shipping details connected to a fugitive she was hunting had been passed on to her by someone on the Thanix team. Shepard had requested the engineer's presence personally; he was not prepared to trust any channels of communication.

"How's Moon Pie?" she asked the yeoman, who didn't rise to the bait.

"He's glad to have probably crippled Nos Astra's Eclipse chapter beyond repair," Kelly said coolly. "And he'll be accompanying Miranda to do more of the same tomorrow night, though he refused to give me as many details." Kelly's eyes narrowed and her expression became more thoughtful. "I wonder sometimes," she added in an undertone.

"Sweetie, you wonder all the time,"said Kasumi, dreading the prospect of another paranoid monologue from her friend over Shepard's fidelity. "So, any news of this suspiciously well-informed engineer?"

Kelly shrugged. "No follow-ups from the last piece of info; no," she said. "Why?" she added after a brief pause, looking Kasumi dead in the eye. "Do you think this'll help your efforts with Gabby and Ken?"

"It would be nice to understand these grease monkeys a little better, yes," said Kasumi. "But this is more of a mission-relevant question. This planet is a cyber-crook's dream. If was still hacking and stealing without restraint I'd be in heaven. I doubt there are any home-grown locals we can trust, especially if one bad night in a snobby restaurant results in a never ending delay in exterminatory service."

"I guess you're right," said Kelly, though it was clear she had not abandoned her suspicions over Shepard and Miranda.

"Besides," continued Kasumi, "it'd be a pretty big coincidence if it turned out to be-"

"Hello everybody!" chirped a cheerful asari maiden, hurrying through the main doors towards them; though with some difficulty, as her generous bosom threatened to burst free of her dress with every step.

"Oh my god!" Kelly gasped. "Tell me that isn't-"

"Yep," Kasumi muttered. "The not-so-secret admirer." Kasumi could see the maiden's inexperience with high-profile missions; the typical confidence of Enetha's species gone. Her pace was hurried; she seemed twitchy, unable to let her eyes settle anywhere.

The sound of more controlled, authoritative footsteps then rang through the room. Miranda had entered, and was fast approaching the asari.

Seized by a brilliant idea, Kasumi grabbed Kelly by the arm and pulled her behind the nearest pillar.

"Ow! What the hell?" Kelly whined.

"_Sshh!" _Kasumi hissed, "I know how we can resolve this!" She cast a wary eye on the engineer and Executive Officer, who were themselves speaking in hushed voices. "Follow my lead, and go along with every lie."

"What are we lying about this time?" Kelly asked. "I'd like a few seconds of preparation for once!"

"We don't work with the Normandy team at all, but we've met them," Kasumi whispered. "Right now we're just leaving."

"Why?"

"She'll be prepared to talk, that's why."

"Talk?" said Kelly, clueless. "About what?"

"Just go with it." Kasumi moved them to the nearest gold-rimmed corridor where they waited.

Miranda was always terse, and it wasn't long before noticeably more nervous Enetha was heading their way. A quick glance behind them revealed Goldstein exiting a women's bathroom, halfway towards the elevator.

"We'll only get one shot at this," the thief said from the corner of her mouth. Then her voice changed as Enetha came within speaking distance. "Hello there!" she said, holding out a hand. "It wasn't us,"she motioned to Kelly, "you were greeting earlier, was it?"

Enetha shook her head with a rather shy smile. "Well…yes actually. You mean, you two aren'tworking with…" she stopped, evidently afraid of divulging information to outsiders.

"Working with who?" said Kelly, sounding quite convincing to Kasumi for once.

Kasumi took the reins again as Goldstein came closer. "Oh, the docked ship's crew? No. I'm Cara Hoy, this is my business partner Kym Pifko. We're on a business trip, Synthetic Insights if you must know."

"What's with the hood?" Enetha asked, nodding to the red flap of clothing stitched to Kasumi's shirt.

"Personal reasons," Kasumi muttered through gritted teeth. "Anyway, we've-"

"We've only stayed the night," said Kelly. "We're en route to a conference and…we've had some technical difficulties with transport, you know how company sponsors can be."

_We're losing her, _Kasumi thought. She heard Goldstein stop somewhere behind them. _And how am I going to explain this to Goldstein?_

"So…" she sneaked a glance at Goldstein, who was leaning against the wall with raised eyebrows, "we were just leaving actually. Our cab is outside."

"I won't keep you," said Enetha, stepping to one side.

Kelly and Kasumi remained static. "Oh no!" said Kasumi, "our driver can wait." She let out an uncharacteristically snobbish laugh. "We met some of the team last night, they're a pretty odd bunch. You must've had some pretty interesting adventures."

Enetha laughed, trying not to look too pleased with herself. "I'm a recent addition," she said.

"What do you do?" said Kelly.

"Engineering," the asari said, still looking like she wasn't so sure about talking to them.

"So you must know Kenneth," Kelly blurted far too quickly.

Kasumi could have kicked her. Even Enetha appeared to have figured out something was amiss in their questioning.

"And," Kasumi quickly added, "that friend of his…" she nudged Kelly, "what was her name: Abby? Gavorn?"

Kelly only shrugged, and both women looked expectantly at Enetha, who had smiled at the mention of Kenneth's name, but was just as confused over Gabby as they were pretending to be.

"Kenneth's friend?" the asari said, brow furrowed, slender finger stroking her chin. "Kenny's friend…yeah!" Her face lit up for a moment. "I met her yesterday, not sure if I can remember her name though…"

Kasumi heard Goldstein chortle, and tried to figure out how they would lie their way out of this one.

After a few seconds, Enetha seemed to have racked her memory to its end. "Oh, 'Gabby's' the one you're referring to!" The asari leaned in and lowered her voice to almost a whisper. "Flat chest? Deep, manly voice?"

Kelly's eyes almost popped out of her head and her mouth slumped open.

Kasumi bit down on her painted bottom lip. Enetha had revealed enough.

_Bingo, bitch. _

Goldstein moved in before the act could fall apart. "You guys talking about Gabby?" she said with a determined brightness in her voice. "I work with her." She started up her omni-tool, opening a photo album, and a picture of the whole crew after that.

"She does Propulsion Engineering," said Goldstein, pointing out Gabby. Her finger moved to Kenneth. "And him."

"You mean hedoes Propulsion Engineering too?" Enetha asked, taking her own turn to look shocked.

Goldstein looked her dead in the eye. "No."

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Ground Floor, Entrance Hall – Later that day**

Hawthorne's appreciative wolf-whistle welled up and cascaded through the Entrance Hall like a shrill wind. It did not come unprovoked; for a buxom, statuesque asari was striding across the lapis lazuli floor with almost sensual confidence. This asari was unlike all the others they had seen so far on Ilium; well-armed and tightly-armoured though showing smooth blue skin in all the right places.

"Oh. Their. Goddess!"Matthews gasped. He leaned against the pillar and raised his chin in an attempt to look more casual and less impressed. "How old does the file say she is?"

"Who cares?" said Hawthorne, mirroring the gesture and making it look even more desperate. "I'm sure she's legal," he added sarcastically.

The two men watched Samara go over details with the concierge for a few moments, and their mouths formed into stiff circles when she bent forwards to add her signature to the database.

"When do you think she lost her virginity?" Matthews whispered in awe.

Hawthorne shrugged, eyes still on Samara. "Seventh Crusade? Oh man, the experience_..._as long as she hasn't fallen out of practice since then."

After another few moments of silent observation, Matthews nudged his friend. "Hey, I'm not saying she's old, but when she was in school they didn't teach history!"

Hawthorne guffawed, tearing his eyes off the Justicar. "I'm not saying she's old, but a blue accordion once mistook her 'azure' for its long-lost twin!"

The two men weakened from laughter, Matthews had to lean on his friend for support.

"Nah, but seriously though," said Hawthorne when they had regained some degree of control. "I'm sure she isn't _that _eroded down there, and-"

"Perhaps when you gentlemen are done joking about my advanced age and sexual prowess," said a cool, controlled female voice, "you could move out of my way?"

Their heads snapped back to the Hall, and there she was. Samara was several inches taller than both men, and examined them with a frighteningly tranquil expression.

"Yes ma'am," they chanted in unison, leaping apart to let her pass without another word.

Their humiliation turned to fear as Zaeed emerged from the same corridor, chuckling. "Blew that one in record time, didn't you?" he growled, sounding like a disappointed father.

Hawthorne stared at his reflection in the floor and Matthews suddenly found his fingernails very interesting.

"Well why don't youtake a shot?" Matthews mumbled through a clenched jaw.

Zaeed shook his head. "Not my preference," he grunted. "I used to be attracted to asari, then one of 'em put a bullet in my knee."

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **GoldaG

**To:** KellyGrrrl, KasumiG

**Subject: **This game of yours

You HAVE to count me in.

Btw, what's at stake here? I can put 200 creds in, tops.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **GoldaG

**Subject: **Re: This game of yours

Welcome aboard!

To answer your question: 578 big ones. If you really want to join, I'll add another 22 and make it 800.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To: **GoldaG, KasumiG

**Subject: **Re: Re: This game of yours

Fine, let her in. More money for me.

* * *

**Nos Astra Hotel, Third Floor, Virtual Entertainment Centre**

All of life's worries were gone from Kenneth. He shut down the console and happily relaxed into the beanbag, still laughing.

"Time to call it quits for tonight, I think."

It was dark out. Everybody else must have gone to bed.

Gabby relaxed with him, laying her head on his shoulder. "What time is it?" she said sleepily.

Kenneth didn't know. They had spent hour upon hour reliving the height of their bygone gaming years – bringing up old stories that never lost their hilarity, swapping in-jokes while constructing new ones, arguing over combat strategies and RPG choices until they were blue in the face and never letting more than two feet of empty space grow between them.

He yawned and stretched out, knocking over two empty bowls (once overflowing with popcorn) with his feet and enjoying the excuse to drop his arm over Gabby, pulling her closer as he did.

Gabby didn't resist, in fact; he could have sworn he felt her smile against him. With each closing screen and dying light, the room grew darker, and Kenneth couldn't bring himself to move away from Gabby. He didn't _want _to move away.

"Why did we ever stop gaming?" Gabby asked, speaking into his shoulder.

He resisted the urge to move her head by shrugging. "Guess we didn't have too much choice, did we? Stupid adult responsibilities."

She giggled. "If I'd known about the amount of Drake Era II DLC they'd be putting out, I'd have chosen an easier career."

"I don't believe that!" he said. "I'd 'fall apart' without you, right mom?"

"Nah. That was just posturing in front of Shepard."

"I bloody knew it!" he laughed, squeezing her harder.

She shifted her body closer, hooking a leg over one of his, and draping an arm over his chest. Her soft breath brushed his neck.

Kenneth's heart rate quickened, but he still made no effort to stop her. "Goodnight Gab," he whispered as the last light shut off and darkness enveloped them.

She leaned up and kissed his cheek once more. "Night Kenny."

Kenneth closed his eyes and wrapped his arms fully around her, letting sleep take him.

It meant everything to have a friend like this, not that annoying, intrusive asari he had met yesterday –

- whatever her name was.

* * *

**I borrowed the "And him" line from **_**Bones; **_**Gabby and Ken's biggest influence.**


	20. Interlude

**Nos Astra Hotel, Third Floor, Breakfast Lounge**

Goldstein's discovery of Gabby and Ken wrapped around one another like tangled Christmas lights in the VEC prompted her to make perhaps the most unexpected proposal in the wager so far. She suggested suspending all competition until the next shore leave, as it appeared as though the engineers were getting along just fine unprovoked. If the couple in question united during that time, one half of the money would go towards getting them a celebratory gift, and the other half would return to its original owners, with apologies for all the madness sparked so far.

"It's perfectly logical," she said to Kelly and Kasumi the following morning at breakfast. "Kasumi wants to spend more time stalking Jacob like a total creep."

The thief nodded her agreement, hearing Goldstein's words only vaguely over the montage of stolen Nos Astra Hotel gymnasium security footage playing and replaying in her mischievous mind.

"Kelly wants to spend more time with Shepard."

Kelly, who had been typing, erasing and retyping a message to the Commander about just that particular issue, grunted her approval.

Goldstein leaned back in her chair. "And I want to spend more time ogling the ship, provided Enetha doesn't crush my head like a walnut with her biotics after that little stunt of ours yesterday. Brushes with death and nights of drunken chaos just aren't my thing, shore leave or no shore leave."

"Alright," Kasumi muttered, still daydreaming.

"Fine," said Kelly without care.

Goldstein's eyebrows went up for the hundredth time that week. She had not expected such an apathetic lack of resistance from her opponents, surely there was at least something in store from the always adventurous and risk-taking Kasumi. Was she so fixed on Jacob that inducing krell spider infestation and defacing priceless artifacts were no longer worthy pursuits? Or was this just another one of her masterful bluffs?

The truth lay somewhere in between. And even to the thief, it was apparent that the time had come to tone down their collective behaviour, at least until the crew were in a less expensive and breakable environment. Security were watching them all without rest and the Normandy's senior officers were seldom around long enough to act as a check on the staff's power.

"So…" Goldstein studied both women one last time, looking for the slightest hint of deception in their eyes. "We're cool for the next few missions?"

"Yes," said Kasumi.

"Yep," chirped Kelly forcedly as her latest message was sent.

Goldstein couldn't keep the disappointment from her voice. "Alright then."

The three women stood up and began to go their separate ways for the day.

"On one condition," Kelly added without warning, eyes on the departing Kasumi who batted her barely-visible eyelashes with an expectant smile and hand on her shapely hip.

"No cheating. I mean it this time."

The relaxed and jovial atmosphere of a typical shore leave had only just begun to descend on the crew when Cerberus proved their extreme wealth and focus once more, finishing the installation of both armour and cannon alike a mere two and a half weeks after Goldstein's newest rule was introduced. Only Shepard was not surprised by this, as he had found Engineer Enetha unusually flat and professional for an asari maiden, and assumed her to be a disciplinarian of some renown. This was true to some extent, following the maiden's encounter with Goldstein of course. Even the least attentive of her team guessed it to be something about that redheaded human she'd obsessed over for one afternoon to no avail.

Zaeed's training of Grunt reached a deadlock when the young krogan began showing the signs of entering adulthood. This was a line the mercenary was not going to cross.

"Like I've said countless times: I can handle the killing and the unecessary gunshot wounds and the moaning and the bitching and the general lack of appreciation, but I _ain't _telling that big lizard where babies come from," he told a captivated crew one afternoon in the hotel gardens.

All the unpleasant twists endured by the squad and crew on Ilium so far had only concerned matters that would be left behind once their mission resumed: none welcomed the idea of taking a krogan back onto the ship who in addition to being a perfectly-grown killing machine, was now hormonal and prone to mood swings even more over the top. Grunt spent most days in the gym or shooting gallery and was given pearls to chew, worthless statues to smash and a plentiful supply of Hemingway, Faulkner and Steinbeck - with only Shepard knowing about the literary distractions.

Samara found solace in Nos Astra Hotel's generous number of rooms devoted to meditative and spiritual practice, possessing the good sense to seal herself in beyond the sight of any lustful humans. She was joined by Thane, when Hadley had shown adequate recovery and began (to the amazement of many) spending most of his time doing paperwork and rewriting shoddy reports of previous missions. The assassin and Justicar were soon firm friends.

Jacob and Garrus passed the hours in the hotel basement's shooting gallery, carefully timing their sessions so as not to encounter Grunt or his mentor, who had started to bore even them with his war stories.

Kasumi satisfied her kleptomania with items she would always return to the strangest places, driving the ever-vigilant staff wild as no compelling evidence of her involvement surfaced. Even if any had, the caretakers, bellhops and bureaucrats of Nos Astra Hotel had their hands full with Jack, who had calmed down following Shepard's promise to return her to Pragia, but still posed a challenge to any sapient being without elite combat training.

Most unexpected of all was Miranda's change in temperament following her hushed-up night out with Shepard. The coming fortnight saw her join the crew at dinner, make conversation in a tone of voice that _didn't _terrify and even smile at the least amusing things (instilling undue confidence in the duo of Matthews and Hawthorne, but her standards hadn't fallen in any way). The Executive Officer's cold, uncompromising focus consistently surfaced for mission-related discussion without fail, but little did she know that showing a softer side of herself had boosted morale in a way she never could have predicted.

Gabby and Ken spent this brief time either avoiding the too-well-informed Tali or coming up with excuses for why neither wanted to visit the ship again for the same unwitting reason. This resulted in dual suspicion over why every excuse was always accepted without argument, but who they to complain? As Enetha worked her team without mercy, furious at why Kenneth hadn't told her about his unappealing bedfellow, they brought themselves tentatively closer together. Daylight offered them generous time to game, argue over gaming, discuss engineering, argue over engineering, and eventually reconcile before the sun went down. Night time gave them more treasured, moments of whispered conversation, hesitant touches and sometimes drowsy embraces.

During one weekend, Gabby's lovesickness took a reckless turn. She 'accidentally' left all of their windows wide open in the morning, too angered by the inexplicable breaking of their heater to close them. Bedtime began as a ludicrous bout of shivering and ended in eight hours of spooning, only five of which also involved sleeping - though Zaeed bursting in and lecturing them on window and sniper safety at three in the morning had more to do with their sleeplessness than any sexual tension.

Gabby would have descended into crippling embarrassment over the issue if Kenneth hadn't 'coincidentally' forgotten to close the windows or fix their heater the following day, dooming them to another evening huddled together in a fit of giggles. Grunt's problems kept Zaeed at bay that night; it almost made the young krogan's mood swings tolerable.

They had never been gladder to suffer a no-show from an exterminatory service (there was no real, immediate need to remind Shepard, so they let it slide).

With each passing day there was just one more joke or Tech Academy anecdote shared before they went to sleep. Just one more chaste kiss, one more caress of the hand or squeeze of the shoulder, or any other gesture that fell far enough within the confines of friendship to keep both of them hesitant and confused over the other's intentions, but grateful for the intimacy nonetheless.

* * *

**Nos Astra,** **Veus District, Private Docking Bay #15**

Gabby and Ken were the last to board the Normandy, stopped in their tracks by the ship's improvements. Almost everybody else in their volatile troupe had passed through the airlock before Gabby could even get her first appreciative words out.

"That is…" said Gabby in an awestruck voice, staring into the gargantuan dual-barrelled Thanix cannon now protruding from the Normandy's open underside…"even more awesome that I could have imagined."

True to its discreet quality, the new and almost impenetrable Silaris Armour had been revealed without any outstanding aesthetic differences from the last layer, save for perhaps a more pronounced ability to catch the glaring Ilium sunlight. Gabby and Ken didn't care for it as much as the Thanix, maybe because there had been no envy-driven, emotional falling-out over asari starship armour.

When his own state of adoring catatonia had lessened, Kenneth nudged her shoulder, grinning. "Hey Gab."

"What?" she said weakly.

"Are you surethe Normandy's still a she?"

"_Kenneth!"_ came the expected response, followed by the also expected punch in his arm.

Gabby had never really minded his little 'female energy' joke: she just wished he had included the word Gabby in his list of shes, and decided he would not get away with failing to notice her sex again.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineer's Quarters**

Same old quarters. Same old little living spaces. Same old cold, small beds. They spent far too long stood wordless in the corridor, side-by-side, staring into their rooms. Their separaterooms.

"Sooo," said Kenneth.

Many things had been said and done on Ilium that could not be taken back, and neither were sure if they loved or hated this fact. No other shore leave had ended with them returning reluctantly to the Engineering Deck, it was normally perfect for people like them: cool and dark and filled with the reassuring hum of machinery and smell of finely-polished metal. No other shore leave had ended with them returning to the ship with souvenirs that would be treasured for a lifetime: Kenneth had wrapped his Perugia model and his half of Orno T'Ratha's sacred Eye in several layers of clothing. Gabby had done the same with her own half. And now here they were, no longer satisfied with the idea of maintaining their beloved tradition of talking through the thin wire mesh. They wanted something more. Life had changed. Life had changed but stillthey were too afraid to capitalise.

"Mmmmmmm," murmured Gabby, wringing her hands. It was getting hot in there, despite the active air conditioning.

"Here we are."

"Yeah."

They turned to face one another.

"Do you want to stay up and talk inane drivel for a few hours?" Kenneth said. "My room?" he added without letting a second slip by.

She held her arm out, and he interlocked it with his own. Wearing their brightest yet shyest smiles, they marched into his room together.

"Just one thing Gab."

"What?"

"We're drinking yourcontraband stash tonight. You can quit leechin' off mine if you want us to stay friends."

"Contraband?" Gabby gasped, haughtily raising her chin, all too aware of the surveilance cameras. "I don't know whatyou're talking about."

"That's my girl!" he murmured when the door closed behind them.


	21. Words

"IT'S A TRAP!"

"_Kenneth Donnelly!_ What have I told you about quoting science fi- wait, what?"

The deck alarm never lied. Either that or this was Joker's most tasteless prank yet. The Engine Room filled up with flashing blood-red light and the ship shook violently. A hideous, metallic cry blared through the speakers, disintegrating into a muffled crackle before going silent. The noises that followed were just as unnerving; Gabby and Ken picked up a heated yet mostly incoherent exchange between their Helmsman and Commander.

"…_done fast, Joker!"_

"_Can't get…system overload…back online!"_

Gabby's terminal flashed, flickered and died with a feeble whine.

"Dammit!" she growled, rushing to Kenneth's side. "Ken, what the hell?"

Kenneth's face had turned white; his jawbone was trembling in suppressed panic and determined concentration. His fingers flew in a skilful blur over his keyboard as the ship continued to shudder.

"Whole ship of theirs just tore our firewalls a new one!" he gasped, trying to reroute backup power to the deck. "This Collector technology, it's…" he trailed off, shaking his head.

The alarm's pitch dropped and its flashing slowed, plunging them into momentary stretches of darkness.

"How's power?" Gabby said.

"It's fucked."

"For how long?"

He frowned, and through gritted teeth said, "Not now Gab!"

Gabby slammed a fist into the railing in front of them. Nobody on the ship had been okay with this endeavour, and even Shepard's sharp tongue couldn't extract any meaningful details from the Illusive Man about it. There were many things too good to be true about a perfectly disabled yet intact Collector ship floating undiscovered through space so soon after the end of their shore leave on Ilium, so easy to track, so far outside the intel of the turians' reinforcements or Terminus organisations.

Gabby and Ken were even less fond of Tali's insistence that she go along with Shepard into the heart of the ship. They had come to like the quarian in more than a professional way, and did not look forward to the idea of continuing such a mission without her innovative leadership or warm reassurances.

The only upside to their situation was the absence of Jack, who had just been toppled midway through a glass of Johnny Walker Black at the bar in Kasumi's room.

EDI spoke over the still-blaring alarm. Even the cool neutrality of her own voice had been infused with an intensified edge, almost bordering on panic.

"Engineers Daniels and Donnelly, the overload you just experienced was…" Her voice faded away into incomprehensible static. "I am currently fighting Collector firewalls in over eight thousand nodes and am taxed to capacity. You will need to restore all functions to your stations manually and prepare for evasive manoeuvres."

Joker activated the intercom, beginning his message to them with an exhausted sigh. "Guys, the Collector ship's only just started powering up! Brace yourselves, if they get their weapons online-"

"They won't!" Kenneth shouted, face still white and fingers still fumbling. "I hope…"

The oppressive screech of the alarm died down and was soon replaced by the far more reassuring whirr of the Engine Room returning to readiness.

Gabby dashed back to her own terminal, which was still on the blink. "Why didn't yours short-circuit?" she demanded, glaring at him.

Kenneth grinned and laughed madly, eyes still on his work. "Power takes priority over propulsion, Gab. I've been telling you that for years. EDI only let non-critical systems get overload-"

"Since when is propulsion non-critical?"

"Take it up with her if you don't like it!" he growled, trying to recall three passwords at once.

"Fine!"

They hadn't been able to test the Thanix Cannon yet, and preferred it if their new armour went unnoticed.

Joker spoke again. "Okay, okay…" he sounded flustered, "EDI's sent Shepard the coordinates for shuttle extraction, it's up to the team for now – _no Kelly there's nothing else I can do! – _so Kenneth, make sure everything's working down there for Gabby." He snickered. "Also, restore full power to her terminal!"

Once again, whooping and (more carefully executed) high-fives came through the speaker. Gabby and Ken reached for the intercom's button to shut it down, but their hands touched. They drew back again, faces redder than the deck had been moments ago.

"Come on guys!" Matthews said through the intercom as the shaking slowed, "not even a 'just in case we die' quickie?"

"Shut up!"Gabby hissed.

"How about a kiss then?" said Joker.

"Joker, there are better things to be a joker about," said Gabby angrily. "Why don't I tell everybody how we ended up powering the air-freshener down here?"

"I'll be good," said the Helmsman straight away.

Despite the teasing, circumstance forced them to keep all available communicative lines open, and for the next few minutes Gabby and Ken listened intently to the fighting; wincing at every explosion, husk scream, and the chilling voice of Harbinger.

Eventually the ship began to groan and shake again, and the engineers heard the gunshots intensify.

"Shuttle's moving," said Kenneth when the signal arrived.

"Fusion plant?" said Gabby, feeling dizzy from the tides of numbers her eyes had been following.

"Fusion plant's stable," said Kenneth. "Thrusters?"

"Ready," she replied. "Kinetic barriers?"

"Crap. Tali had better survive this. New armour or not, I want those things upgraded."

"We're out of time, Commander! We have to go!" Joker yelled. "Gabby! Ken! Their weapons are online!"

Gabby found she had been clenching her teeth. Kenneth fought to control his breathing.

"Strap in people," said Joker. "We're gonna make them work for it this time."

Gabby and Ken leapt forwards to grip the steel railing as the SR-2 gathered speed, still buffeted by powerful shockwaves emanating from the Collector vessel. According to their terminals, the Normandy had just avoided a massive particle beam by only a few feet.

"Ooh, not good!" Kenneth groaned, his teeth chattering from the ship's bumpy course.

"What is it?" said Gabby, struggling to hold on.

Kenneth put one hand on his terminal, using the other to maintain his balance. "Check the thrusters," he instructed.

Gabby looked down. "They're…failing! What the hell are we gonna do now?"

"I can't dodge this guy forever, EDI, get us the hell out outta here!" Joker cried as another particle beam from the pursuing ship came perilously close.

"Specify a destination, Mr Moreau."

The ship lurched once more. "Anywhere that's not here!" he responded. "And Gabby, Ken, why aren't we moving faster?"

"Not my problem!" Gabby retorted. She turned to her colleague. "Kenneth, where's that power?"

"Hold on!" he said through gritted teeth. "It's hard doing this with only one hand."

Joker sniggered.

"Shut up you!"

"Guys," said the Commander as he joined Joker's side. "We need to be at full power, _now." _

Kenneth made a whiny, frustrated noise. "I'm giving it all she's-"

"KENNETH," Gabby screamed, "DON'T YOU DARE COMPLETE THAT SENTENCE!"

Kenneth threw her one more disdainful look before his frantic work was done. "There," he breathed, forgetting the unstable floor beneath him and leaning back.

"Engaging mass effect core," said EDI.

Kenneth's relief was so great he forgot to hold on as the ship hit the nearest mass relay with the Collector still hot on the trail, firing repeatedly. The Normandy gave its strongest tremor yet and he flew backwards, head smacking the floor.

"Ken!" Gabby exclaimed. She rushed over, also forgetting the instability of their surroundings, and fell on top of him. Their faces almost collided, even though she was able to thrust her hands out in front of her.

"Hello there," he said with a dazed smile.

"Hi," she gasped breathlessly.

Moments later, the ship had stilled, and the deck's functions were returning to normal.

"Well, looks like two-nil to us," said Kenneth. "I'd say the Collectors are running out of lives."

"Yeah," she said, looking into his eyes.

He smirked. "You can get off me now, I think."

Gabby half-laughed and tried to get up, but a tightness seemed to have enclosed around her hands. "Oh no…Ken…" She'd fallen so fast, her fingers had gone through the floor grating beneath. "Ken, I can't move!"

His smirk vanished. "What?How've you managed to-"

"My fingers are stuck, _help!" _She tried to pull them out, but they were in far past the knuckle.

"Okay," Kenneth breathed. Their position was taking its toll on his body, especially below the waist. Gabby's constant writhing and moaning wasn't doing him any favours either. "Gab, hold still! I'll see if I can…wiggle out from under you."

"Okay okay okay!" She stopped moving her arms and hips, feeling her own share of aroused panic.

"Right then," Kenneth muttered, "I just have to do it a bit slower…"

He sat up so his mouth brushed the crook of her neck. Gabby breathed in sharply at the sensation.

Then without warning, a hideous pain shot through Kenneth's left ankle. "AAAAH!"

"What, what?" Gabby squeaked. His arms were around her, and his growl into her ear had sent a surge of adrenaline through her.

"I think…I think my ankle's sprained! I must've busted it when I went down."

"Wouldn't you have felt it?" she hissed.

"I was a bit distracted, what with the perilous mission and you falling on me!"

"This is the last time I show you any concern when injured!" she said. "And we need get up before Jack comes back!"

Kenneth tried wiggling free a second time, but with his ankle in such a state it proved impossible. He fell back again, now trying desperately to get in touch with his genitals through telepathy.

_Don't…you…__fucking__…__DARE__, _he thought. _Maybe if I can just…angle my hips to one side. No, she'll notice!_

They heard the soft hiss of the elevator door outside. Gabby's head dropped onto Kenneth's shoulder. "Please let it be Tali," she groaned.

The door to their left opened, and in came Hawthorne. Their heads flew up and turned to him.

"Hey guys, Shepard sent me down to check up on y-" He spotted them. "Oh my god!"

"Help us!" Gabby shouted before the taunting could begin. "Help us right now goddamitt!"

Hawthorne's mouth was sagging open, his eyes widened and shone with shocked hilarity. "Bu…but…what?"

"We're stuck, you bloody arsehole!" Kenneth barked. "Pull Gabby off me!"

"Sure you don't want me to pull you out of her?" he asked with a glowing smile.

"Hawthorne," Gabby said in a dangerously low voice, "if you pull me up, I promise I won't kick your ass for that remark."

"What am I supposed to do?" he said, still right on the edge of laughter.

"Go to my room," Kenneth said. "Get the toolbox, we'll take it from there."

Hawthorne rushed off, releasing his laughter the moment he was out of sight; he wasn't out of earshot.

A bright red Gabby looked Kenneth dead in the eye. "Toolbox? What are you trying to pull?"

"Your fingers? Out of the grating?" he drawled with a smirk that made her as furious as she was aroused.

"Uuugh! I want to hit you _so much _right now!" she screeched.

Kenneth held back his head-butting quip, as she would most likely miss its humour and interpret it as a command.

_Wow,_he thought when taking a daring look into her eyes. _Angry, flustered Gabby is straddling me. Probably shouldn't mention that I had this dream only last week, only we were right in front of the Drive Core._

"What's taking Tali so long?" said Gabby after several horribly awkward seconds. "Heck, I'd take Jack at this point."

"Really?"

"YES!"

Spittle rained down on his face. "Steady on!" he protested, "don't get excited!"

"Kenneth, being on top of you isn't quite enough to get me excited."

"What's that supposed to mea-" Kenneth stopped, aghast. Gabby was smirking. "Did you just…did you just quote you-know-what at me?"

"Yes." There was madness in her face; Kenneth had never seen her blush harder. "Who knows, maybe I'm getting used to it."

Hawthorne then created a large distraction from this thrilling moment by re-entering the room without a toolbox.

Kenneth turned to him. "Where's the-"

"Smile!" Hawthorne switched his omni-tool's camera on.

"FUCK YOU!" Gabby and Ken roared in unison.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Deck 3, Medical Bay – Later that day**

The door opened and a sheepish-looking Gabby stepped in, wringing her stiff, bandaged fingers.

"Hey," she murmured.

"Hey," said Kenneth from his padded chair, leaning to one side so his propped-up foot didn't obscure her.

"How's the ankle?" she asked.

Kenneth shrugged. "Long as I keep still tonight and cautious at work, it'll be okay. How are the fingers?"

It turned out Gabby's fingers had been badly lacerated by the accident, and medi-gel reserves were thin; most went to Tali following a nasty suit puncture aboard the vessel. Dr Chakwas had treated Gabby's wounds 'the old-fashioned way,' slowing the healing process by days, even weeks.

"They'll be fine. I can still use my terminal, but making a fist to use on your face or any other body part I consider appropriate will have to wait a while."

He snickered, albeit nervously.

Gabby only smiled at him, and her tone softened. "Hey I'm just kidding." She pulled another chair close to his side and leaned in. "I'm sorry I yelled at you down there. Before the mission, during the mission…after – you know what, I'll just apologise for all of it."

Kenneth put an arm around her, keeping his eyes fixed on a ceiling light so she wouldn't notice his blush. The post-mission atmosphere – though always an emotional affair – had been even crazier this time. A giggling Patel and Rolston had pried Gabby's trapped fingers free using engine lubricant under the hateful glare of Jack, Kelly had aggravated a bullet wound in Shepard's ribcage with an almighty hug and Hawthorne had sent his prized picture to the remaining crew with original captions while Dr Chakwas had tended to Tali, meaning the injured engineers needed to wait a while, refusing to speak to one another as they did.

"Tell me. Do the references bother you that much Gabby?"

She rested her head on his shoulder. "Nah. I'm just used to complaining. And you're a great muse for that. Like target practice."

"This is your Helmsman speaking: the Thanix Cannon test starts in less than a minute!" Joker declared to the ship. "Our maimed engineers might want to pay attention, and no; I'm not referring to you Tali. Joker out."

"Sweet!" said Gabby, who forgot her injuries and worsened the pain by rubbing her hands together excitedly.

"Gabby, help me up!" Kenneth thundered with joy in his eyes. "Time for a joke that doesn't suck."

When back on his feet (with Gabby standing by, should he fall) Kenneth cleared his throat and drew himself up to his full height. "Now witness the firepower of this _fully armed _and _operational _Thanix Ca- hey!"

Like the alarm earlier, Gabby and Ken's omni-tools fired up and flashed red. All aboard heard the unmistakeable, tremendous whooshof their new weapon. Joker either wasn't listening in on the Med Bay any more or hadn't bothered waiting for Kenneth.

"They didn't even let me do the 'fire at will Commander' part!" he whined.

Gabby touched his arm as they settled back into their chairs. "Oh well, maybe next time, Ken."

"What next time? When?"

"I dunno. When are we next due to test insane, semi-legal, cutting edge weaponry in the Terminus Systems?"

"When…Zaeed takes Grunt to Omega to get him laid?"

Gabby snorted, slapped a hand over her mouth and broke into shudders, letting the occasional squeak out.

"What?" he said, giving her a sidelong look. "No punch in the arm with your good hand, or disapproving _'Kenneth' _this time? Bugger me: those drugs must be working wonders."

"Those were standard painkillers, Kenneth, nothing more." She turned to him, chin propped on his shoulder. "Maybe you're just funny. Ever considered that?"

Kenneth's vision was fixated on the ceiling again. "I might have, once or twice…but I've got a pretty harsh critic, it seems."

Gabby gasped. "Never!Who is she?"

"Didn't say it was a she, did I Gabby?"

Her mind flashed back to his comment on 'female energy.' "No; you most certainly did _not _say it was a she," Gabby said perhaps a little too sharply.

Kenneth shifted from discomfort and cast another nervous sidelong look in her direction. What had he done to upset her now?

"How did you come to think it is a she, then?" he asked.

"Oh…no reason."

He sighed. "Guess not."

Silence again. Kenneth tightened his grip, and the two of them were soon in that familiar position; the one that had brightened so many days and nights on Ilium; his strong, reassuring grip and her sweet scent; her head on his shoulder and his hand on her waist; both of their bodies warm and grateful.

"This critic," Gabby said under her breath, "she sounds like a real bitch."

Kenneth stiffened and his grip tightened further. "Oh, I wouldn't say that!" he exclaimed. "Granted…she can really test my patience sometimes but, I don't know what I'd do without her."

Gabby kissed his shoulder. "I think she should show you more appreciation, I really do. And I don't think she knows what she'd do without you either."

"Hmmm."

Kenneth turned his head and looked straight into Gabby's tired eyes, intense and unblinking. They were almost nose-to-nose. A strange chill passed through both of them; the likes of which had not been felt for over two and a half years, even their first night in Nos Astra hadn't felt so intimate. They thought of the Perugia's broken and burning Engine Room, and what they could have shared that night. There was no Captain Marlowe on the SR-2. There were no regs against fraternising in Cerberus. The Med Bay was silent, save for the soft hum of its machinery. What was holding them back?

"Gabby?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do we fight all day and then…do this all night, and then fight all day again?"

"I've stopped trying to understand human behaviour, despite the fact that I've been one my whole life," she said, ending with a little yawn that bumped her top lip against his.

"So…we can just play the 'it's a suicide mission and we'll be as nuts as we want to' card?"

"Mm hmm," she mumbled. "Works for everything else, doesn't it? And it's not as if ourbehaviour has been the craziest. Miranda's actually started smiling."

"I'm still in shock!"

"And I hear Jacob took Kasumi up on one of her offers recently!"

"Oh yeah? Which one? She strikes me as the kinky type."

Gabby leaned in closer, until their foreheads were touching. They were speaking in the softest of whispers. Everything around seemed to melt away. "According to scuttlebutt – which can be a good thing sometimes, I guess – she claims expertise in massage-"

"Oooh!" said Kenneth.

"-and said he looked a little tense."

"Was this after he got that message about his dad?" Kenneth asked.

Gabby furrowed her brow. "Yeah, I think so. Damn, no wonder he was down."

Kenneth gulped; he hadn't meant to lower the mood. "So," he hastily added. "Do you she'll grant him a…happy ending?"

Gabby's eyebrows went up, and her lips curved into a suggestive smile. "It isn't a stretch of the imagination."

"Don't you just love it when people live up to ethnic stereotypes?"

"Sure do, my foul-mouthed, whiskey-swilling friend."

Kenneth tried to laugh, but they had run out of reasons to prolong the inevitable: and nothing in dark space or through the Omega-4 Relay could have frightened him more.

Well, truth be told there was something that frightened him more: and that was spending every day until he died wondering how much better life could have been if they had shared it together.

"Gabby," he whispered. "With all that's been going on and all that's definitely going to happen, no turning back…what the hell are _we_ waiting for?"

Gabby's breathing slowed and deepened. Not even the pain in her torn-up fingers existed any more. There was nothing but his eyes, his close body…their memories and her unquenchable desires…

Her eyes snapped shut.

_I'm so afraid._

She pulled away.

_I can't._

She leapt to her feet and started for the door.

"Gabby?" He spoke with the voice of a wounded man. She turned and saw a shocked and infuriated Kenneth confined to his chair yet still trying to pursue her.

"Don't you run again!" he begged. "Don't do this to us!"

"_Me?" _she cried. There were no tears. There was only the cold fear she had not felt since the Perugia. "You ran too, Kenneth! We were both so stupid that day!"

"I KNOW!" he bellowed. "Gabby _please! _I want us to put it right. I want to look at that gift from you and not think about the worst mistake we ever made! We were stupid for so long, but then on Ilium I realised something, and so did you-"

She cut him off with a hysterical shake of the head. "No Ken: we're stupid because we allowed ourselves to get so close! We know how dangerous the mission is, and the fact that surviving this one means we graduate to even riskier ones. Our enemies-"

"We can beat the Collectors!"

"And then what, Kenneth?" There would be no permanent prevention of the Reapers' attack.

Kenneth could only stare at her.

"I want this as much as you Kenneth," she continued as their hearts broke in unison. "I've wanted this for so many years! But the thought of…"

She saw the bodies: endless in number, floating through the lavender nebula before Sovereigns remains. How would she be able to carry on if he joined them? Why should she subject him to the same crippling grief?

"I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry but…I just _can't stand it!"_

Gabby fled. To Kenneth, the closing door might as well have belonged to a prison cell, sealing him in with his misery.


	22. Plans

**[NEW MESSAGE] **

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl, GoldaG

**Subject: **F*cking disaster

We've got a really nasty situation on our hands…

* * *

**From: **GoldaG

**To: **KasumiG, KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Re: F*cking disaster

What - Kelly's Honeymoon Syndrome? Because everybody knows about that already; and it's not the biggest surprise.

* * *

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To: **GoldaG, KasumiG

**Subject: **Re: Re: F*cking Disaster

Oh ha ha! /sarcasm

* * *

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl, GoldaG

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: F*cking Disaster

Yeah…*backs away slowly*

So I just stole today's MedBay CCTV footage (FYI, I was after Jacob's post-mission check-up before either of you accuse me of breaking the truce)

…and Kenneth spilled his guts. Gabby ran for it.

* * *

**From: **GoldaG

**To: **KasumiG, KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: Re: F*cking Disaster

Oh god no

What now?

* * *

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To: **GoldaG, KasumiG

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: F*cking Disaster

Kasumi, remember that 'Plan B' we discussed last week? I say we execute it.

* * *

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl, GoldaG

**Subject: **Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: F*cking Disaster

Let's do it.

* * *

**From: **GoldaG

**To: **KasumiG, KellyGrrrl

**Subject: **Plan B?

What are you talking about? This isn't going to result in more destruction or mutilation is it?

* * *

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrrl, GoldaG

**Subject: **Re: Plan B **(EDIT: **That rhymes!)

Just come to my room pronto.

* * *

**From: **GDaniels

**To: **KellyGrrrl, KasumiG, GoldaG

**Subject: **Enough.

I heard about your little planned intervention (Kelly's not as subtle as she thinks she is)

Forget it. I don't want any more of my personal life decided for me.

Please, I'm begging you; respect my decision. This is between the two of us.

I'm grateful for all you've done for the two of us so far, and I know your intentions have only been good (thanks Kasumi, I guess I won't be needing the dress/shoes any longer) but what both of us need is time.

I can put up with the rumours and the teasing but this is going too far. No more bets, no more tricks and NO INTERVENTIONS.

* * *

**[VIEWING: CShepard - Inbox]**

**From:** TZorah

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Status Report

First of all, thank you again for agreeing to help me with the Fleet. I know you must be sick of sorting out domestic disputes for friends, but hopefully we can get through to the Conclave without flying bullets.

The shield and kinetic barrier upgrades are going smoothly – even more so than last time. Cerberus certainly know their starships (though I hope none of us are forgetting how they came to)

And C-Sec isn't asking any more intrusive questions. Never thought I'd be glad about the extent of the Illusive Man's bribes.

There's just one pressing issue right now: I'm worried about Engineers Daniels and Donnelly. I understand their absence from overseeing the ship's upgrades during our shore leave on Ilium was due to a rather _personal _reason? Sorry – I don't quite understand how far human affection goes regarding cheek-kissing. Keelah, kissing is pretty much alien to quarians altogether. But they aren't saying a word to each other on or off-duty, and I can tell they're not getting adequate sleep.

Don't get me wrong; I'm not asking you to pull rank in that wonderfully dramatic, two-minute speech way of yours, because I'd be able to do that myself – learning from the best as I did (you're a better diplomat than you think)

Call it a hunch. Their work hasn't exactly suffered, but talented as these two are, I'm just not feeling good about our chances with morale this low.

P.S. I gave them until after our brief Tuchanka visit to bury the hat-stand (I think that's the expression?) so don't bother with their alibies when you confront them.

* * *

**From: **KellyGrrrl

**To: **xxX You Xxx

**Subject: **Don't worry baby :)

It's alright, Grunt choosing Zaeed as his Battlemaster doesn't make you any less of a man. I don't doubt you could have pulled it off, but it's so worrying when I hear about what you get up to out there :(

SOOO excited about resuming date night. I hear the Presidium restaurants are the most romantic in the galaxy...just saying ;)

Also, totally unrelated but: have you kept in touch with the Consort at all since that first email?

And I don't want to hear any more about that breeding request.

* * *

**From: **DrSolus

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Re: D&D

Commander,

Have completed full physical check-up on Engineers as requested. Dr Chakwas' input also invaluable, must remember to thank her beyond sincere verbal gesture. Iced brandy perhaps? No, too predictable; also, don't want to encourage further inebriation – am aware that yourself and the doctor reminisced about Alliance friends and shared memories, don't want to sully uniqueness of the experience with simple redo. Flowers perhaps? No, too difficult to maintain aboard starship without properly-programmed VI, easy to mistakenly interpret as romantic gift as well; don't want to look unprofessional.

Engineers Daniels and Donnelly currently still in passable working condition, but some disturbing signs present. Have noticed significant weight loss and symptoms associated with lack of sleep. Cerberus engineering a demanding job, full health ideal for more trying missions; _must _improve before we tackle Derelict Reaper.

However, physical examination can only go so far. Psychological factors central here. According to rumours (anecdotal evidence often least trustworthy basis for forming hypothesis – "scale itch needs scales" _not _necessarily true; have always found Mr Krios' behaviour most gracious; nothing in it indicative of bestiality. Will investigate Urdnot Grunt further) Daniels and Donnelly neared romantic relationship. Like I said, anecdotal evidence untrustworthy, but considerable factors pointed to this following thorough investigation of rumours. More than just rumour at this point.

Assumed they would sieze opportunity to make amends on Tuchanka - krogan notoriously clumsy with engines, much work done together without Chief Engineer Vas Neema overseeing as well. Opportunity missed it seems. Emotional stress heightened by fact that they have been enthusiastic gamers for many years and are facing temporary bans from Autoware Social Network. Nonsensical ending to Quantity Consequence 3 likely tipped them over edge when combined with personal heartbreak, results unpleasant for site moderators.

According to eyewitness testimony from Crewman Patel, both Engineers engaged in volatile argument, ending with Engineer Donnelly expressing desire to never see Engineer Daniels again if current mission is a success. Testimony trustworthy - Miss Patel gains nothing from lying. Would not suspect it of her. Engineers both driven to irrational emotional extremes. Engineer Donnelly seems to be suffering from what salarians colloquially refer to as 'Catalyst Logic' (simply called illogic among humans) - does not wish to be apart from Engineer Daniels so makes sure he is apart from Engineer Daniels so he never has to face the pain of being apart from Engineer Daniels.

Therapy required: does not make any sense.

Situation problematic: am not well-versed in finer points of human psychology. Current expert Yeoman Chambers (be sure she takes prescribed medication for Honeymoon Cystitis _and _refrains from vaginal intercourse for required time – have sent vids of alternative pleasurable practices for the two of you to consider should frustration arise) most likely candidate for joint therapy, but Engineer Donnelly's recent walking in on roleplaying-themed sexual encounter between the two of you may hinder likelihood of him opening up and trusting. Yeoman Chambers' rumoured, recent involvement in underhanded 'wager' to bring them together another problem to consider.

Decision remains yours to make, Commander. Too many variables for me to consider right now. Will talk to you in the event of further clarification.

**EDIT: **Sorry, appears as though excessive thought process made it into message. Will be more careful with editing in future.

* * *

**From: **UGrunt

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Final Submission [1 file attached]

Essay submission to: Galactic Literary Appreciation Society/Human Literature/Classics/20th Century/Criticism/Term 2

Attached: 1 TextDoc

_"How is the authority of literary texts determined? Complete provided online form with reference to at least __**three **__critical theories studied._

_Chosen texts: _

Fowles, John – 'The French Lieutenant's Woman  
Beckett, Samuel – 'Waiting for Godot'  
Pynchon, Thomas – 'Gravity's Rainbow'

* * *

**From: **UGrunt

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **Re: WTF?

Sent it to the wrong dropbox. Also, it wasn't mine.

Don't tell Massani.

* * *

**From: **ZMassani

**To: **CShepard

**Subject: **The boy

Now don't you go reading too much into this (I've got no time for this fruitcup shit usually) but I want to know for sure that he'll be taken care of, even if he is in a clan now.

I don't doubt the kid – haven't seen potential like his before.

Most important is this: he may officially be a grown man with the reputation and the breeding requests and everything; but I really don't want to hear he's overdosed on pussy straight away. Give your teenage son or daughter an asari-engineered skycar for his 18th birthday and what have you got? A mangled wreck that breaks your heart. And a dead teenager.

Grunt needs to be careful. At first, diving into the deep end may be the best idea in the world but before he knows it, he'll be listening to their problems and chasing after all the little brats all day every day. I've seen it drive just as many men to the bottle or shotgun barrel than PTSD.

And I'm not knocking Wrex's leadership either. Tough old bastard was one of the only krogan we couldn't take out back in the days of my DMZ tour with the Suns. Weren't any winners, looking back on it. I'm glad he didn't succeed in taking out Vido though, would have denied me the pleasure. One can always hope right?

* * *

**[VIEWING: CShepard – Outbox]**

**From: **CShepard

**To: **KDonnelly, GDaniels

**Subject: **Your health

The two of you will attend a joint therapy session with Yeoman Chambers during our next shore leave. I'll send you the times when we've figured out something more concrete. You may want to message the Yeoman in advance if you have any questions. Attendance is compulsory.


	23. Overload

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Third Floor, Gabby's Room**

No matter how hard she tried, Gabby couldn't supress it. Couldn't forget. Every detail lingered, as wonderful as they were horrible. She silently thanked whatever benevolent power was out there that she had not been born a drell. How could they handle it? Even the enigmatic Thane had proven unable to withhold the darker truths of his past life from the pull of scuttlebutt for very long, and Gabby couldn't imagine how painful it must be to slip into a fully-realised representation of those bygone horrors. Perhaps she could ask him for advice later. Advice on how he managed to stay so focused with such a venomous cache of torturous visions lying in wait at the back his mind.

But until that happened, Gabby was at the mercy of her emotions; a hideous mixture of spite and unassailable love. Or just two sides of the latter.

"_Time is it?" Kenneth muttered, his lips gloriously close to her ear._

_Gabby only yawned and shrugged. She took great care to overemphasise the latter motion, drawing her arms out and pushing her eager body against his. Kenneth responded by wrapping his arms around her as the initial haze of morning semi-consciousness lifted. She felt his lips brush her ear again, this time curling into a smile, and he furthered the their now mutual gesture until they were snugly spooned together, shifting back and forth, the motion of their muscles a series of shuddering spasms, unrestrained expressions of appreciation, comfort; pleasure. After the expected stab of momentary hesitance, she sighed and pulled him just a little closer, entwining their fingers as they had done on every dreary night and lazy morning. They spent so much time together, there were so many opportunities, so many sweet nothings and delicate touches and small pangs of regret over the slowness of their absurd, on-going saga of flirtation. _

"_Gab? Time?" His voice was lower but still earnest. _

"_Dunno." The bedroom was warm and bright, aglow with its trademark periwinkle. Given the strength and angle of the sun it must have been nearing midday, but neither made an effort to move beyond the scented, soft confines of the bed or the other's embrace. She felt his hand moving up and down over hers, stroking the skin which was soon goosebumped and doubly sensitive and eager for so much more. _

"_This is nice," she moaned._

"_Mmmm. It is." Neither sounded as casual as they intended. _

Looking back, Gabby had always ended the memory there – or at least ended the factual account, substituting the following events of washing, dressing and exchanging loaded dialogue with something she wouldn't dream of revealing to any psychiatrist.

She groaned.

Psychiatrist…

It was today. She'd come to adore clinging to the amnesiac opening seconds of the dawn; before reality revealed itself to ostentatiously brandish its many knives, all sharpened and ready for her heart.

She pulled the sheet around her (a starchy and stiff cover with nothing of Kenneth's familiar scent etched within) and turned away from the door. No use faking illness this time. She made a bitter sound; maybe halfway between a chuckle and a sob, maybe both in all their contradictory fullness.

Faking illness?_ – _who was she kidding? She had never been one to feign illness (her father had stamped that kind of behaviour out quickly) and her inexperience in such matters would probably fail to convince Kelly or worse, Shepard. But this time, physical and emotional exhaustion - which had likely implanted some insidious affliction beneath the surface; some dormant degenerative disease just waiting to burst forth and eat away her brain at the next enraged look Kenneth threw her way – were realities.

_C'mon girl! _Her inner voice had turned to some bizarre sound halfway between her mother's stern tones and her own. _Don't let him win. We can't let him win._

Ten more minutes, then she'd force herself to start the long march, face the bastard and collapse back into bed. Rinse and repeat. Until then, she'd just wallow in more thrilling setups to non-existent fulfilments of desire. But with a therapy session leaping around callously in the spotlight of her mind, blackening otherwise hopeful horizons, the effort proved beyond her. Something else came back to her: Kenneth's hating face; Kenneth's body shaking with malice, all of it directed at her; detesting her for entrenching herself so deeply into his life, becoming something he couldn't live without yet didn't want anymore. His words would have broken her on any ship, planet or station, in any city or colony, though she had to admit; Tuchanka's omnipresent ash and universally outspoken brokenness and decay certainly hadn't softened the blows.

_They were fighting again. Fighting over something stupid, trivial. She even couldn't remember, and wouldn't be surprised if he couldn't either._

"_When this is over you might just understand!" she'd yelled at him._

_He smiled with cruel derision, laughed as if she had become nothing more than a joke to him. Gabby would have felt better if he'd struck her or grabbed her throat. Kenneth made no effort to cleanse his response of mockery. _

"_When this is over?" He leaned in and dropped his voice to an icy growl. They were almost nose-to-nose. _

"_Gabby: when this is over, you and I are strangers. And I can't bloody wait."_

"_I wish I'd never met you!"_

She sat up in bed and faced the door again.

_God, why do I __**hate **__him so much?_

Another greyish flicker came: Kenneth laying his heart on the line for her in the Medbay; totally exposed, expressing a desire to be hers for the rest of his life, and her cowardly exit from the room.

Then came another in the surge: their last public incident, and the last time this irreplaceable and sometimes insane friendship of theirs had come to Kelly's attention, back in the good old days when a jealous outburst over Garrus had been the height of their problems (in addition to the Suicide Mission and release of Quantity Consequence 3, but seriously, who was thinking about them anymore?).

Kelly had been so calm, so sure of herself.

"_I don't think you hate him." _

"Dammit." She ran bandaged fingers through her hair. "You'd better be right, Chambers."

* * *

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Third Floor, Kenneth's Room**

Kenneth didn't sleep much anymore. Even if he could, he'd find no safe haven from the memories. His dreams would betray him, torture him with those departed tastes of what he'd come so close to. What they could have shared.

_Abandoning a final, futile attempt to still his freezing limbs, Kenneth rolled over to face Gabby. She was turned away, facing the door. Despite having no light aside from what the moon and stars could offer, Kenneth was able to discern her slender form, rapidly rising and falling in the cold. _

"_You cold?" he asked through rattling breath and chattering teeth._

_What a stupid question. His own words had steamed, white and wispy on the air._

_Gabby chuckled, stifled slightly by the unwanted motions of her own body. "Uh-huh." _

_Kenneth couldn't take it: the guilt over this perverted scheme of sabotaging the heater in a pathetic attempt to 'make a move' beneath the sheets, the shameful joy he could still feel from discovering Gabby's uncharacteristic cockup with the windows, and his equally shameful hope that this had been an intentional move on her part. All it had got him were two hours of shivering in this periwinkle freezer. He deserved the punishment and readily accepted it, though wished Gabby could be spared. _

_She turned over, and Kenneth spotted the now familiar twinkle in her eye; one that could only be seen when she smiled at him in the dark. _

"_Looks like we'll have to resort to the ol' huddling together to stay warm cliché."_

_Kenneth gulped. Was it really that easy? Or was he letting desire skew reality again? There was something in that voice of hers. She was enjoying this far too much. _

_Gabby' raised her eyebrows, now grinning. "Come on, don't be shy, I won't bite Kenny." _

_Blimey, she really __**was **__a man eater. Kenneth tried a smooth comeback but faltered, though not from the cold. She was on her hands and knees, fast approaching. There was a sly shyness in her face, a subtle challenge to follow her lead. _

_She had never been more beautiful. Dishevelled, unpretentious, perfect to him. He flinched at her touch, blaming the cold under his breath. Gabby remained unperturbed. Their embrace began with mutual gasps soon turning to laughter from the sudden rush of heat and everything immaterial that came with it. Kenneth was almost overwhelmed: her breath on his neck, their sensitive bodies squeezed together, her smooth, bare leg gently hooking itself over his._

_It was no good. Not if he wanted to keep the more obvious bodily signs of affection under wraps. Kenneth sat up and began to turn her over. He broke all eye contact as if doing so would disguise the move as a casual, everyday occurrence._

_Gabby groaned. "What're you doing?"_

"_Mmm?" He stopped. "Thought you wanted to…"_

_She propped herself up on elbows digging into his midsection. "What?"_

"_Nothing." He fell back into the pillows again and surrendered. Without a moment's hesitation Gabby had moved closer, gripping tighter. _

"_This is much better, isn't it?" she whispered._

"_Yeah." Warm as he was, Kenneth's breath was still ragged. _

_Gabby's head settled beneath his chin. Her smiling lips teased his neck with soft kisses. An arm snaked over his chest. A finger unfurled on the tip and began drawing lazy circles. Kenneth smirked. That felt like another challenge. With perhaps his final ounce of daring (at least for the night) he placed an arm around her small waist and clasped his free hand over hers. _

"_Much better," he sighed._

Then came their last night together in Nos Astra, the one he'd been reviewing and revisiting over and over again like a frustrated commanding officer in a combat simulation chamber back in Edmonton. If he'd done this, or that, or said this, or withheld that or remembered to do this…the alternate scenarios were endless, and the real thing had been utterly thrilling. No wonder he'd been so reckless after their victory at the Collector Ship. He'd already passed up one hell of an opportunity.

_The day had been long and tiring, but he knew neither of them would be able to get any sleep. Come sunrise they'd be out of here and back on board, long working hours and all. Back under Tali's watchful eye, back in a more 'professional' environment, back to all the dangers that could finally bring them together or throw them apart. _

_They were spooned together once more in the welcoming darkness of their sanctuary. Kenneth lay completely still, breathing into her hair, ever alert for the next signal. Gabby squeezed his hand until numbness set in. _

"_Kenneth…" _

_That was all it took._

"_Yeah?" _

_He trailed a finger over her thigh, up and down and up and down. _

"_Kenneth…" There was desperation in her voice. She was pleading, but for what? _

_A conflict of fear and lust raged within. His movements were hesitant but unceasing. His hand crept around her waist, then up to her belly, touching the warm skin beneath her shirt. She inhaled sharply but didn't say a word. The shirt Gabby wore was very loose at the neck, easily pulled down. She inhaled again as his lips touched the bare skin of her shoulder. He trailed kisses up to her neck, beneath her ear, on her cheek…_

_Her breath finally came out as a long, lingering moan. _

"_Gab?" he kissed her ear. "Gabby?"_

_She pulled away, turning to look him in the face before leaning in again, back into their well-practised embrace. Gabby was smiling tiredly, but there was something different in her eyes. Some longing he had never seen her give to anyone or anything. Another challenge? Another trick of the dark, of his hopelessly infatuated mind? The intensity of it frightened him: all timidity was gone from Gabby's face._

_It was his turn to gasp, as her hand slithered beneath the fabric of his own shirt, and her other silenced him by settling over his mouth. Gabby was grinning again, leaning in. This took him back…back to the Perugia, to his every subsequent fantasy. _

"_We should sleep," he blurted robotically. _

_His imagination was sufficient, he didn't need to see the hurt in her eyes to know it was there as he turned away and defensively wrapped his half of the duvet around him. _

"Chambers, Chambers, Chambers," he sighed as another empty bottle rolled across the floor to join the others. "Fix this and I'll never say another word against your demented libido again."

* * *

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Third Floor, Shepard & Kelly's Room**

"Ready to rock that therapist's chair, Dr Lowenstein?"

"Stop calling me that Kasumi!"

"Fine, Dr Chambers."

"I'm not a doctor."

"Chambers?"

"Too formal."

"Melfi?"

"Don't get cute."

"I've been nothing but cute since day one! How am I supposed to get?"

Kelly hissed incoherently and pulled two drawers on the room's dresser open. The session was still a few hours away but despite months of trying to tactically visualise its every outcome in her head she still feared a failure. She'd been wide awake since sunrise and had yet to even find an appropriate outfit for this crucial occasion; her bright pink dressing gown certainly wouldn't do.

Kasumi, attired in typical figure-hugging black, chuckled at her friend's inexplicable yet still mounting panic. "You'll have much more to worry about than clothing when you're locked in with those two for an hour, or however long it takes in the real world." She frowned, remembering the richness of Kelly's wardrobe during previous shore leaves, at least since her friend had started dating the Commander. "Wait a minute, what happened to your smart jacket with the really cute skirt?"

Kelly's blush clashed with the pink of her gown. "It's um…torn beyond repair."

"Say no more." She moved away from Kelly and swept her always-keen eyes over the rest of the room. Spotting a trinket worth stealing would alleviate her boredom. When those eyes found Shepard and Kelly's bed, Kasumi closed them, disgusted and regretful. Each of its blue glass bed knobs had been obscured by a well-wrapped leather belt, all of which bore signs of heavy use.

_Could at least have the decency to clear up afterwards, _she thought. _And what if this therapy actually works? Are they gonna follow the example of this…nymphoma-_

"Kasumi!"

The thief's uncomfortable vision cleared and her eyes opened again. Kelly was frantically waving a hand over several potential outfits, amassed upon the dresser in a crumpled pile.

"Oh right…um…" She selected two random pieces of clothing, her mind still on the struggling couple. "How about this?"

"That skirt with that top? Why?"

"Alright, alright. What's wrong with this?"

"Wow, you stilldon't think there's a colour clash going on here?"

Kasumi clenched her jaw. _Just go along with it until you figure out a way to sneak into that session undetected. _

Kelly left the bedroom in unremarkable casual wear. If Gabby and Ken would need to relax before the barest foundation of progress could be established, Kelly figured she would have to.

Kasumi walked by her side at first, but as the two of them left the hotel's sleeping quarters and reached the lounge, she was tip-toeing behind, wildly gesturing to every familiar face they passed.

"I sure don't envy you," said Rolston, more than a little amused.

Patel gave the yeoman an encouraging smile, as she didn't have it in her to impart honest commentary on the likelihood of any therapeutic success, having witnessed Kenneth's rage and Gabby's subsequent iciness first-hand. Goldstein set her coffee and datapad down to give Kelly two thumbs up, but couldn't sate her rubbernecking with such a tame gesture and leapt to the other woman's side, tearing down the floodgates of her curiosity until a torrent of incessant questions poured out.

"You gonna ask them how they managed to spend two weeks sleeping in the same bed without doing the deed?"

"No?"

"Even in the dark?"

"No."

"Kissing?"

"No."

"Copping a feel?"

"No."

"Spooning?"

"No."

"_Really?"_

"Yes. Wait…" Kelly stopped and Kasumi bumped into her. "I'm pretty sure they did the last two."

She instantly regretted answering the technician, and by the time they all arrived at the room Shepard had set aside for their session, it seemed half the ship had joined them.

"Was Gabby ever bothered by his morning wood?"

"Is it true Kenneth tried to bring that asari in for a three-way?"

"Are we ever going to find out the truth about the scale itch mystery?"

"Shut _up _all of you! I haven't even started the session yet! And when I will, I'm notgoing to be asking those questions. And if I did, I wouldn'tgive any of you the answers!"

Thin air coughed beside her.

"Except maybe you Kasumi."

The sudden sound of Gabby's genuine coughing in the next room, probably in a feeble attempt to stand strong against the effects of another miserable, sleepless night, dispersed the crew and scattered them out of sight like disturbed insects, around every visible corner and through every visible doorway. A flustered yeoman and still chameleon-ised thief were left outside the door.

"You aren't coming in cloaked," Kelly whispered. "Scratch that; you aren't coming in at all!"

"I'll respect your wishes on this occasion doc, but believe me; if I wanted to get in there unnoticed there wouldn't be a thing you could do about it."

Kelly turned away from the disembodied voice's point of origin, placed one hand on her hip and slid the other into her pocket where it found a tiny tracking device.

"We agreed on no more of these!" Kelly could almost see the thief shrugging and smirking.

"Did we? It seems in all this excitement I forgot myself," said Kasumi silkily. "Don't blame me!" she added, "you told me to focus more on stalking Jacob now that Gabby's wise to us.

Kelly flushed red and opened her mouth.

"Don't bother," said Kasumi lazily. "I'll stay in my own territory for now. Wouldn't want your little therapy session sabotaged by the thought of several undetected listening devices planted and the fact that you have no time to find any of them, would we?"

She skipped away, leaving a flustered Kelly behind, and bumping into a brooding Kenneth in the nearest doorway.

"Goto," he growled with a jerk of his head; an attempted respectful nod which looked more like a tick of suppressed savagery.

"Donnelly." She sounded calm enough, at least to her own ears. But was Kenneth really in any condition to notice?

She looked back over her transparent shoulder. Gabby was still out of sight, probably waiting for Kenneth to arrive at the session before her. But why – to send a subtle message, that she didn't care as much as he did? Or had she just broken down at first sight of him and was heading back to her room?

_Gotta stay focused where I can. _She turned back to Kenneth.

It was getting harder and harder to determine which of the Scotsman's haggard features were the result of this godawful blue found on the decoration of every asari building and which were the accurate warning signs of his recently erratic lifestyle of lonely anger and lonely drinking. His eyes were reddened, sunken into dark circles, his skin pale yet blotched in places from lack of sleep, his stubble was uneven from half-hearted attempts at shaving.

"Can I…" the words came out hoarsely. He coughed and tried again. "Can I get by?"

"Sure."

She stepped aside. _Oh Kenneth, you pitiable, strangely adorable fool. _

There it was again inside. That feeling a thief of her stature should be immune to. Guilt. _Wish I hadn't thrown Kelly off focus with that listening device remark. These two need the best therapy they can get._

Kenneth stumbled towards the private lounge where Kelly waited, stopping a few times to clear his phlegm-stuffed throat and smell his pungent breath.

Kasumi shoved off the useless guilt and found a new surge of purpose for this disastrous situation. _Guess I'll have to put these listening devices to good use._

* * *

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Second Floor, Private Lounge**

The session began just as Kelly had expected. Kenneth arrived first, looking unkempt and ill-prepared with his head hanging low, shoulders slumped and a slight smell of alcohol following his every step. After one sharp nod acknowledging the presence of his therapist, he collapsed into the couch seat opposite her chair, nearest to the window. Gabby came in mere seconds later, having evidently given up any ideas of being fashionably late. She leaned against the closed (and auto-locked) door like a socially-awkward teenager for a few painful moments before meeting Kelly's begging eyes and taking the couch seat nearest the door, positioning herself as far from Kenneth as possible.

Had the two engineers been alone with her for any other reason, Kelly would have succumbed to embarrassment by this point. Her last real encounter with Kenneth had given him an unprecedented look into her personal life. But he needed her help, and she was sure such things were no longer on his mind.

_I wonder how much he told Gabby. Did he make anything up? I could coax it out of her._

No. Focus on the task at hand was needed, even if it meant coming to terms with their knowledge of her 'thing' for statuesque superior officers in tight boxers wielding cutlasses, or Kasumi's infernal devices.

Kelly took a deep breath and sat up straight in her chair. It was far too much to expect more eye contact from either patient yet, let alone a return of her smile. "Okay," she squeaked. "Thanks for coming guys!"

She cringed. _Too bubbly. _But she may as well have said nothing. Kenneth didn't take his eyes off the window. Gabby remained fixed on the door, though every few seconds they wondered to scan one half of the room for a clock or some other mechanical teller of time.

"So, uh…" Kelly began again, this time throwing more strength into her voice. "You both got my pre-session notes, right?"

Gabby nodded. Kenneth let out an affirmative grunt with an upward inflection.

"And, just so we're clear; what were they about?"

"Summin' about dreams?" Kenneth mumbled into his hand.

"That's right," said Kelly. She activated a datapad, hoping the gesture would firmly inform her patients that their session had begun, and there was no way back. "Mordin has been…curious about how your uh…changes in daily routine may be affecting the subconscious,"

_I think that lie sounded convincing enough._

…"so let's talk about our dreams, shall we? You first Gabby."

Gabby raised her scruffy head and her dry, unused lips slowly peeled apart. Just as she finally looked prepared to talk, Kelly's datapad flashed as an unexpected new message arrived.

**- What. The. Hell? Dreams Kelly? **_**Really? **_**Weren't they discredited in psychiatric practice like a century and a half ago?**

Kelly almost dropped the pad in shock. So Kasumi _wasn't_ bluffing this time.

**- Bear with me - **she hurriedly typed almost looked engaged enough to be insulted, and Kasumi's response came far too quickly, placing a reluctant smile on Kelly's face.

**- In that teeny little room? RUN! – **

"Another listening device?" Gabby croaked as Kelly abandoned note taking for the time being and threw the pad aside. "Thought I told you and Kasumi enough was enough."

Kelly's heart raced. She hadn't expected such sharpness from Gabby, not in this condition. Kenneth's unexpected interest worsened the situation. He furrowed his brow and looked at his former best friend.

"Wassiss?" he muttered.

Gabby leapt to her feet and went for the door, slamming her fist against the unyielding red lock. "No way!" she hissed, infuriated. "I am _not _going through with this, I don't care what Shepard says!"

"Gabby _please!" _Kelly urged. She got up and approached the Propulsion Engineer with a level of caution that was usually best suited for wild animals or drunk krogan.

To her horror, Kenneth snorted at the sight. "Fancy that, Gabriella Daniels, running out on responsibility."

Kelly threw herself between the two of them, almost falling down as she did. But Gabby made no attempt to attack him, whether through self-control or paralysing anger Kelly would never know. Gabby doubled her efforts to pry open the door, teeth now clenched together.

"You're not my goddamn _responsibility _Kenneth! Even though I have been fixing your screw-ups for all these years! And I sure as hell-"

"Right. Fuck this." Kenneth got up and began looking under Kelly's chair for the room's keycard. "I am notspending another moment in here with her."

Gabby's retort cut across Kelly's. She wore a vicious smile, but would not look at him.

"What's the matter, scared? Got some sleepto catch up on?"

Kelly guessed this had something to do with their daring foray into physical intimacy during the last shore leave. And sure enough, the beet-red shade and pulsing veins of Kenneth's face all but proved it.

"Guys, calm down! If, if you could just-"

Kasumi's next message went straight to Kelly's omni-tool, and despite the thief had done, this surprised her. So much for just worrying about listening devices, now it seemed her rival could tell when her datapad was out of reach.

**- Need some help? -**

No_. _This debacle required a real backup plan. One that Kelly could be proud of for once. She closed the message and hit a new button.

"_DANIELS! DONNELLY!"_

Gabby ceased her assault on the lock. Kenneth put down the chair, colour draining from his face. It was never a good idea to bother Shepard on the job. Right now he was in the bowels of the Citadel, battling goodness knows what, hardly in the mood to take personal calls over their spat. Sounds of gunfire and grunting blared from the omni-tool and a wave of shame washed over the engineers.

"_SHOULD I REALLY HAVE TO GET INVOLVED? WELL, SHOULD I?"_

Gabby's face fell. "No sir."

Kenneth sat down again. "Sorry Commander."

Painful silence followed. Despite the tension, Kelly liked the idea of attributing Kasumi's sudden lack of correspondence to awe at her backup plan, and fought hard to conceal pride as Gabby returned to the couch and the scene returned to something resembling normality.

"Take five guys. Hell, take as long as you need. Just be sure to return before the Commander does. We'll start over then."

The door unlocked and they were away without a word. Kelly smiled down at her omni-tool's newest feature.

_So glad I got him to record that! _

* * *

**LOADING PRIVATE PROFILE: "KellyGrrrl"**

**NEW DIARY ENTRY: "G&K – lovemaking or heartbreaking in the making?" **

**Session 1**

Total session time: 73 seconds (without the yelling and fighting). A new personal worst. Yay for me.

**Additional Comments:**

F.U.B.A.R. – just as I feared.

Session 2 starts in a couple of hours, give or take. Maybe I can outdo myself again. How am I supposed to concentrate when my poor Cuddlebug's being overworked? God, I worry about him. And what he does. Now he's out with that busty Justicar all the time. And Miranda won't stop yapping when he's around, _and_ Jack wants him to take her back to Pragia. I think I need a proper, formal therapist's outfit; we're doing too much military roleplaying in the bedroom lately. I imagine he'd want to forget about the battlefield when we're having sex. I mean, yeah, I want him to be on my mind a little bit when he's out there, else I wouldn't strip in front of his armour case so often, but lately he's been talking about how much he'd like a 'normal life' so I guess a sordid affair with an Alliance shrink isn't too much of a stretch, right? I don't want to go straight into the cliché stuff (French maid, terminal repair man, janitor's closet) too quickly. Then again, I'm not sure Dr Chakwas would recomme

**WARNING! HACK ATTEMPT DETECTED. INITIATING SECURITY MEASURES. PLEASE WAIT A FEW MINUTES…**

…

…

**!**

**ATTEMPT FAILED. PLEASE RE-INSTALL ANTI-SPYWARE** **PACKAGE.**

Relax, kiddo it's only Kasumi! I'll have your feeble security back online in just a sec. There was no other way to reach you, so I thought I'd

Wait...

*reads*

Can you _ever _stay on-topic? That brain of yours, it's like Mordin on Spanish Fly! No wonder you need my help!

**EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN?**

**!**

**SHUTDOWN FAILED.**

Don't you shut down on me, Chambers! This will only take a minute.

Two things, then I'll leave you alone. First: I've sent the others away (and will be joining them, don't panic) on a surprise outing. All three of you need some space.

Second: and let me speak (type, whatevs) completely seriously here; I think it's kind of weird that you have to teach these two to trust when you've got a lot to learn yourself. I'll leave it at that.

And yes: I'm fully aware of the irony of that statement coming from a thief who just hacked your terminal and is typing this before your very eyes. But trust me, by trusting him.

You'll thank me later.

xx

P.S. Fix that entry title! I almost vomited. Good luck with the next session!


	24. Therapy

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Second Floor, Private Lounge**

"And it turns out to be this fucking…doe-eyed, hoodie-wearing…ghostly…super-annoying little eight year-old _piss weasel!"_

Kelly stopped typing and dropped the datapad into her lap, trying hard to maintain a mask of professional neutrality though feeling a rebellious eyebrow curve up nonetheless. Kenneth was now immersed in the most intense rant she'd seen in weeks. It was good to see him focus his anger on something besides Gabby, she supposed. Apathy was by far the most frustrating hindrance to work with therapeutically and at least she could draw some level of sincerity from him in this state, even if it was over an irritating video game _deus ex machina. _Deciphering Kenneth's Scottish lingo, on the other hand, would take his co-operation. Or Gabby's, but Kelly's hopes weren't up for that.

"_Piss weasel?" _the yeoman asked, wordlessly cursing the dash of red in her cheeks which joined her high eyebrows.

"Just another insult," Gabby drawled, still refusing to turn her head away from the door to the man on the couch beside her, or the woman seated opposite. "I suppose he has to be good at something," she added under her breath.

"I see," said Kelly. She made another fruitless note. "Carry on," she sighed.

"And he goes on and on and on, and all of a sudden I realise I'm holding one of those defunct game controllers, and I'm mashing the button like a madman, but you can't skip any of it!"

"Wait, you mean you were dreaming of playing this as a game?"

"No!" he snapped. "I'm just standing there, completely immobile. And then he…uh…I can't remember…something about a packet of skittles. Tasting the rainb-" Kenneth groaned and let his head fall forward into opened hands. "I dunno whatthe fuck I'm talking about."

Gabby made an almost approving noise, though her eyes remained fixed on the door's red holographic lock; the prison guard to appease, the prize that would grant her freedom. Kenneth noticed.

"What?" he demanded. "You got something to add?"

"Nothing you'd bother listening to," she muttered through teeth gritted so tightly her jaw was trembling in places from an almighty build-up of unvoiced malice. Kelly could almost hear them grinding together.

"Then keep it to yourself!"

He turned back to the yeoman, though Kelly could tell he was looking right through her, through a passage of time into five years of memories, good and bad, all the while wondering how it could have come to this while simultaneously berating himself and fate for refusing to intervene.

"Let's stay on track!" Kelly said. She pushed a box of tissues in Gabby's direction, and to her surprise, the engineer accepted without quarrel. "Any other dreams Kenneth?"

"No."

Except the one where he was transported two hundred years into the past and ended up beside a swimming pool, Gabby slowly climbing out of it wearing a red bikini and saying "Hi Kenneth…you how cute I always thought you were" as 'Moving in Stereo' played, the whole scene slowed and she began taking off-

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!"

"Okay," Kelly sighed as she made another token note and fought the temptation to use her pad's memory for a more promising endeavour, like rating her lover's various physical qualities out of ten while the hopeless duo before her prattled on.

_Progress. Progress. We're making progress. We've been in here for forty-five minutes without anyone storming out or raising their voice beyond what hotel staff deem appropriate. They're talking. To each other, in front of each other. They don't know you only brought up dreams to warm up their talking. _

This she had told herself every minute without fail since her patients took their seats, until it became her own droning, unending mantra of propaganda, beaten relentlessly into her being. She updated the minutes like a prisoner scratching new lines into their cell wall's day-by-day tally. And it wasn't like she had no problems of her own right now. Who did Kasumi think she was, lecturing on trust? The most disturbing part of the thief's little remark was the nagging doubt it had birthed; a silent, pulsing terror within that she may be right.

But with two patients in the room, a third mind descending into an intense emotional meltdown wouldn't do.

"Gabby? Anything other dreams you can recall before we move on?"

Gabby's only other recollection was involved Kenneth emerging from a lake outside Pemberley but she wasn't revealing that to anyone.

After this, Jack decided to break the increasingly painful monotony by somehow overriding the room's lock and charging in, an unlit cigar dangling from her mouth and several beer bottles in her hand. So Kasumi hadn't rounded up everybody for her surprise outing after all.

"The fuck?" she snapped, through the cigar's stifling effects. "You people _still _haven't figured this shit out?!"

She focused her enraged eyes on Gabby, who had leapt to Kenneth's side of the sofa, though this time with a hand lodged in his side, keeping him a few inches at bay in order to prevent any otherwise spontaneous bouts of leaping into one another's arms.

Kelly's spine stiffened and she gripped the sides of her chair tightly. Jack had shown signs of overall improvement since Shepard's promise to visit Pragia, but the ramifications of some twenty plus years of physical and psychological abuse didn't vanish so easily.

"Jack," Kelly said with the desperately calm, diplomatic tone of a broke parent confronted by their child wielding a priceless Ming vase over the Grand Canyon, "you know we aren't quite done yet, so would you kindly-"

"I _know _this is the best lounge in the area! So why the fuck am I not drinking and smoking in here with all the other freaks on the other side of a locked door!"

Kasumi had either returned early or lied about ever leaving the building. And couldn't resist one last inappropriate message.

**- Hit the roooad Jack, and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more! -**

"The fuck are you smirking at Chambers?!"

"Nothing!"

Kelly's hand slithered to the panic button beneath her chair. "Jack, we'll only need a few more-"

"Men aren't that hard to tame," Jack said to Gabby. She seemed more frustrated than angry. "Just…suck his dick, gargle his balls and try to shut the fuck up every so often."

Gabby's hand curled into a tight fist in Kenneth's side as her whole body temperature shot up.

"Do that and everything else is fair game, eh Kenneth?" Jack added with a smirk. She turned to back Kelly, who withdrew her crawling hand from the button. "Strange," she said slowly. "You go the extra mile and still don't get it…"

Kelly frowned. "What?" She had expected one last mean vulgarism from Jack before they were left in peace, but not this. "Don't get what?"

_First Kasumi, now her? What the hell do they think they know?_

Jack mockingly mimicked Kelly's expression, then laughed and gave the room's other occupants a final, pitying look. "God, you three are fucking stupid," she sighed, and backed out of the room.

"Stay," Kelly said. "That's forty-five minutes, I'd say it's time to take a break. Just keep the window open or something when you-"

"Yeah, yeah." Jack threw her beverages and smokes onto the couch, giving Gabby and Ken just enough time to jump out of the way and flee the room.

"Twenty minutes guys!" Kelly chirped at them, though she felt like breaking something.

* * *

**Alliance Academy of Engineering Technology, 2182**

"_Move it_ Kenneth! Ugh, you're the worst stereotype in the world sometimes," Gabby groaned, trembling under his weight as she half-dragged her stumbling, inebriated partner through the dark Edmonton Campus for what would probably be the last time.

The graduation after-party was winding down, and most of the revelry had remained indoors where it belonged, though the two of them passed quite a few kissing couples (a sight that continually forced Gabby's eyes to the floor, jeopardising both of them), and Nikola Tesla was still wearing a pink sombrero. Most of the more liberal officers had come out to dispense congratulations, all of which involved ordering or accepting several drinks. The remaining members of Alliance brass were either privately drunk, in bed, or climbing into bed privately drunk. Either way, Gabby was glad to see them refrain from laying down the law for once.

Behind them, the Lawrence Krauss Building still bled loud music into the night air. A common tradition among Alliance Campuses involved a marathon of each century's best music, though this time a malfunction had forced a restart, leading to twice as much drinking and placing the current year at nineteen ninety-four.

Kenneth's ringing ears caught the latest song's chorus and he belted it out.

"Talkin' bout _sooooooulshine! _S'better than suuuuuunshine!" he growled, somehow managing to infuse a discernible tune into the lyrics. The smell of several renowned whiskeys was on his breath.

"Sing Gab!" he laughed. "S'better than moooooonshine…damn sure…uhhhh." His voice became an exhausted rattle, like a chainsaw running low on power.

"Better than rain," said Gabby plainly.

"I said _sing!" _he croaked.

"You said my singing sounded like a constipated New York cabbie."

"Ah!" He spat on the floor. "Loada bollocks, you got the coolest voice ever," he said with a mangled smile. "And the bestestest accent too."

"Wow, you really are out of it!"

"And youare still really pretty," he countered.

She drew in a sharp breath. _He's drunk, Gabby, he's drunk. He probably didn't mean it. Stop getting your hopes up girl!_

"Ssss'dark?" Kenneth grumbled. He opened eyes already bloodshot. Gabby wished he hadn't worn his best turtleneck and jacket, even though anecdotal evidence assured her that Scottish vomiting usually in projectile manner, and the two of them were quite safe from splash-back. She decided to respond to this rather useless comment, glad to have been given a reason to disconnect from his thrilling comment on her appearance, drunk or not.

"Yes Ken, it's dark. We were in there for seven hours. You-" she burped, tasting whiskey, "-capped off Captain Morgan's supply of Captain Morgan. Remember?"

"HUH?!" he shouted, causing Gabby to almost drop him.

"Quiet Kenneth!"

They were now approaching the Bill Nye Society's party headquarters, and some members had noticed them. Wolf-whistling erupted.

"Wooooo! Go Daniels! Looks like you two finally figured it out!"

"Go Gabby!"

"Don't exploit him Gab. Seriously, you'll go to jail for that shit."

"You guys going back to his bunk or yours?"

"Shut _up!" _was all Gabby could come up with in her buzzed state.

By the time Kenneth's dorm room was in sight, they had witnessed the galaxy's first ever Autoware drinking game, stumbled through the aftermath of the galaxy's five millionth VA drinking game (an ugly affair) and laughed maniacally at the sight of a naked Cassius Rose trying to hide behind a bush, begging his fraternity to let him back inside.

"Right then," said Gabby as Kenneth, upon spotting his bedside table, went for the nearest bottle like a parched wanderer of the desert. He began retching.

"Kenny no, that's mouthwash! Kenny…Kenny that's a snow globe…Kenneth, that's your alarm clock!"

"Sorry." He burped, drew in a long, shuddering breath and began trying to pull off his trousers with his shoes still on.

"Ken stop! You'll-"

Sure enough, he went down. His fearful yell was muffled by the soft bed. Snoring followed.

Gabby's sigh became a laugh. She removed his shoes, and the bundled mass of clothing around his ankles, then turned him over and, with most of the sheet covering him, removed the jacket and turtleneck; though his surprisingly toned body was not lost on her.

* * *

"I did _not _try to eat an alarm clock!"

"Kenneth, wait your turn. Go ahead Gabby."

"Then…well…that was it. I went to bed and to sleep."

"Nothing else happened?"

"Funny Kelly, I seem to recall you saying we can't ask loaded questions. And Kenneth, you were out of it, you have no right to tell this story!"

"Guys, am I gonna have to alert the Commander again?"

"Alright, fine!"

* * *

Gabby didn't know how long she stood there, staring at him as he lay sleeping, lips curled into a drunken smile. Vague hangover worries flashed about her mind, but they weren't keeping her frozen to the spot.

_No time for inaction, _she thought. They were now Alliance Engineers, First Class, crewmen of the prestigious Perugia. _Act. _

She leaned down and kissed his forehead, stroking his soft hair and leaving her face hovering above his for a long moment, realising that for all she had and would achieve, the sum of her happiness lay not in promotions, postings and propulsion systems, but here; with him.

"Stay the same," she whispered. After squeezing his hand through the duvet and enjoying the slight surge in his smile, Gabby left him.

"Please, stay the same."

* * *

"And then I went to bed, I swear."

Silence.

"Thought I dreamed that last bit," Kenneth said after almost a minute.

Their eyes met.

"Only you were saying it to a traffic light," he added, a smile flickering on his face.

Kenneth stood his ground. He maintained the daring smile, extending an olive branch though challenging Gabby to turn this into argumentative ammunition. Gabby looked back at him, confused at first but unable to hold back the laughter as the joke dawned on her.

For just that moment, all burdens of bitterness and resentment weighing Gabby and Ken down were lifted, taking them back to the final moment of what had been the best days of their lives. Not that Kenneth's joke had been that funny; but its power lay in its necessity.

But neither of them felt any relief equal to Kelly's, who overtook them with hysterical laughter, overjoyed at such a tangible step forward and desperately grateful to Kenneth for breaking the marquee of ice surrounding them.

"I'm still mad at you," Gabby said through stubborn, continual laughter.

"Right back at ya," Kenneth countered with equal levity.

Kelly's head snapped back and forth between the two. Was it really this easy? Did love and hate exist with such a thin, indistinct line of division?

"I told you we'd freak her out," said Gabby. She smiled at Kelly, pity in her face.

"Yeah," sighed Kenneth.

_What the hell is going on?! _Kelly thought. _I'm supposed to hold the edge here!_

"Thanks, by the way," said Kenneth to Gabby. "For not revealing that other thing I did when I passed out."

"You're welcome Donnelly, though you do owe me now."

"Really? Damn. Guess now I can't tell Kelly you failed to notice Bev's tooth falling into your drink and hiccupped down your throat."

"You dick!"

"Whoops!" he sang.

"Scottish word-vomit Kelly, think nothing of it."

"Careful Kenneth, she might make us start the Apology Round early."

"_What?" _Kelly demanded.

"You gonna tell Kelly we snuck a look at her notes before this session Gab?"

"Word-vomit again Kenny. Guess we'll have to start the round early. Not that either of us can fully reveal the last five weeks of infractions to apologise for."

"Calling me Kenny again, eh?"

"Don't read too deeply into that, Mr Smooth."

"That your new email I.D. for me?"

"Maybe…"

They were both grinning like idiots now. Kelly's neck hurt from her rapidly-swivelling head.

"Wait a minute Gab." Kenneth's tone and face softened. "You er…didn't look up Kelly's notes on me, did you?"

"Of course not. You didn't either?"

"Nope."

"Good."

They exchanged shy looks, and at last treated Kelly as an actual presence in the room.

Was this Kasumi's 'lesson?' – or some perversely-humoured higher power's sign; presenting two individuals who at their lowest point could trust one another?

"Better get back to the therapy game Gab, Kelly's feeling neglected."

"Yup, we'd better. It'd be nice for her, walking away with some sense of achievement, having an excuse to play naughty shrink with Shepard."

Kelly's datapad fell. Her jaw followed.

"Whoa Gab! Dirty jokes from you now is it?! Guess I've grown on you."

"You're like a-"

"Fungus? Cancer?"

"I was gonna say 'vestigial appendage' – useless at the moment but gave some great perks in the past, kind of a novelty now."

"Thanks. And again, right back at ya."

"Guys, _please!" _

Kelly found herself on her feet, mouth dry and eyes stinging from prolonged, wide openness. They were worse cocky than despairing.

"Uh-oh. Looks like you've made her mad Kenneth!"

"So have you, Gab."

"So I have."

"Do you think she'll hurry us onto the Thank Yous round early?"

"If she does, I think we ought to thank her for providing us with an object of ridicule to vent our passive aggressiveness onto as we work out our differences."

"Not a bad idea, Ken!"

"Time's up, you two!" Kelly almost shouted. She made a frantic dive for the door.

"No it isn't," said Kenneth.

"Yes it is!" Kelly slammed a hand onto the door's lock. "We've made great progress today, time to move onto phase three, which is talking privately."

"That wasn't in your notes!" Gabby protested.

"Then consider this improv therapy."

This announcement unnerved Gabby and Ken. With Kelly in the room, both had enjoyed having a stable obstacle to prevent discussion veering into more intense emotion, positive or negative or dancing on that absurdly thin line in-between. With Kelly gone, all within them could only be vented one way.

Their sudden trepidation was not lost on Kelly. "If that sounds like such a horrible idea, I'll set your talk for the day after tomorrow."

"Why then?" Gabby asked.

"The Commander told me the Normandy's upgrades will be reviewed tomorrow, and he wants you working there; get you back in the swing of things. If we're lucky we might even be moving back to the ship tomorrow, so I'll keep you guys updated on our therapeautic schedule."

"Cool," Gabby said with failed nonchalance. "Long as the Commander isn't in on your wager."

Kelly gulped. This was the first time Gabby had brought this up face-to-face.

Kenneth's eyes narrowed. "Wager?"

"Nothing," said the two women together.

Kelly fled. Kenneth grabbed Gabby's wrist as she tried to pursue.

"Gabby…" he let go the moment she stopped resisting. "Can I speak seriously now?"

More nervous laughter tumbled out of her. "Depends. Do I have to?" But she knew her quasi-flirtatious argumentation was done for the day.

"Yes, you do."

She turned away again, but did not run. "Okay," she whispered.

"Look – you're still mad, I'm still mad, a whole lot of delicate shit's been coming out recently and…yet-"

"We're still best friends for some messed-up reason?"

"Yeah." He sounded as confused and exhausted as she. "We are."

"I just need some time."

"Gabby!"

"I know Kenneth!" She faced him again. "It's a luxury we don't have anymore. Just…"

"Tomorrow then. On the ship. While we work. Usual routine, whispers. Chambers' plans be damned."

There was something in his voice, some undeniable will that she hadn't heard from him in years. Gabby could only nod her head.

* * *

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Third Floor, Shepard & Kelly's Room**

As she reviewed the days extraordinary notes, Kelly stopped to send a single message to her still absent lover.

**Baby, **

**Sorry about the other night. You can spend as much time with your friends as you like. And don't worry about date night, you've got enough deadlines to deal with. I should be grateful enough to see you alive each time you return, considering how much you risk for us every day.**

**All my love,**

**Kelly**

"Prove me right, Gabby and Ken," she breathed as her shaking finger tapped the 'send' option. "Prove me right."


	25. Decisions

**Hotel Dai'Nara, Third Floor, Gabby's Room**

There was no way Gabby would sleep now. She felt an eerie calm, coupled with an oppressive certainty; a certainty that all the crazy shit she'd been through concerning Kenneth was coming to an end, for better or worse. They would talk this out, once and for all in just a few more hours, when the kinetic barrier tests began.

This was a feeling she had only experienced a few times; before her Tech Academy exams, her first day aboard a real warship, the Battle of the Citadel, the beginning of their current mission. There were few nerves when a big event was so inescapably close, with no turning back. And all those times it had been her ability to rationalise things that helped. She would mentally run numbers, scenarios, check the odds, make notes of what she could do to improve the situation. It was what an engineer did: check the functionality of individual components and the parts each component played in the larger construct they made up.

But her feelings for Kenneth weren't like anything else. They broke all the rules, both as individual components and whatever it was they made up. She needed something to aid her, and daybreak was drawing closer.

So Gabby decided to do the one other thing that always helped in this situation no matter what: pre-emptively check the terrain. Give herself the psychological edge by arriving on the 'battlefield' first. Maybe there all the parts would come together and she would finally figure out both them and the whole they made up. So much of this confusion had started in Engine Rooms anyway. She'd always hated being the last into a room; the first time she visited her extended family she had skipped formal greetings and hid in a bedroom, taking apart plugs for a few hours. Then there was her preparation for the disaster at Armali Palace back on Ilium.

Yes. It was settled. She would go to the Normandy's docking bay now, re-enable staff access without compromising security entirely, and wait for Kenneth there. It would be good getting closure, being able to return her full attention to work. Stop the torture they had inflicted on themselves and one another.

She changed her clothes, did her hair, washed her face with refreshingly cold water and left her room.

_I can do this. _

* * *

**Citadel, Zakera Ward, Docking Bay**

Staff access was already enabled for the Normandy. This was odd: the usual shore leave procedure was to lock the ship down entirely. Kasumi had long since grown bored of sneaking out to steal things and mess around aboard the SR-2. And when the master thief did it, she left every security measure disabled, relishing the challenge of getting through them all without disturbing EDI. And Kasumi always gave the excuse that if any undesirable followed her in, she would be more than equipped to deal with them; a sentiment Gabby agreed with.

And Gabby could only think of one person who would be able to both get in the Normandy undetected _and _decide to leave staff access enabled, so that only fellow shipmates could follow him in.

She turned back, ran to her room, and returned after requiring a certain object. She had no idea why, having never cared for superstition, but it just felt right.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

He was right where she suspected he would be: in front of the Drive Core. But he was seated this time, legs folded, head turned up at the beautiful sight like a curious child. She stopped a few feet behind Kenneth, letting her feet fall heavily enough to alert him that someone was there in case he hadn't heard the door open.

"Hi there," Gabby said weakly.

"Hi," he muttered back. He didn't turn to look at her. There was an unreadable lack of emotion in his tone.

"You couldn't sleep either I take it?"

"Obviously not."

Gabby gulped. Was Kenneth already losing hope in repairing their friendship? He was the one who had so wilfully scheduled the talk that she hoped would settle all their issues once and for all, and that was only hours ago. Where was that determination now? And he had clearly been expecting her to come after him here, so why the stoicism?

"Surprised to see you here, Kenneth," she lied.

"Are you? You should know I'm quite used to sneaking around locked down, high-level facilities at night."

Well that had caught her off guard. They didn't often mention his ABBA-related stunt unless pressed by others.

Kenneth shrugged. "Least I was. Haven't had a good chance to sharpen that skill in a while."

He switched on his omni-tool. Gabby heard conversing voices come out, but couldn't see the miniature projection accompanying them.

"What's that?" she said cautiously.

"New Francis Kitt remake," he said, still indecipherable.

And sure enough, out came the familiar drone of an elcor.

"_With great terror and awe: Omar's comin' yo!" _

Gabby laughed nervously. "Can't say I prefer it over the original."

"Yeah."

Gabby decided to challenge him. He was the one who'd convinced her to agree to some 'final confrontation' and she was damned if either were backing out now; trading forced small talk would no longer suffice.

Just as she opened her mouth to change the subject, something caught her eye. Something beautiful.

_Oh Kenneth._

In his other hand, Kenneth held his half of that asari eye they had received in Armali Palace.

"The Eye of Orno T'Ratha," said Kenneth flatly at her silence. "Asari and their overuse of apostrophes…or whatever they call apostrophes." He examined his half closely. "Wonder when they stopped believing in magic."

"Must have been thousands of years ago."

"So…just a few generations then."

"Heh. Good point. Never saw it that way."

Gabby's heart rate sped up. He had kept his half. And brought it with him down here!

"Sorry," Kenneth said suddenly, having mistaken her further silence for annoyance. He switched off the omni-tool. "I don't what the fuck I'm talking about. Three in the morning thought process, you know how it is." He sighed. "No good at talking. Never was one for diplomacy. No wonder the Alliance stuck you to me."

"Hey, they said I lacked a personal touch."

She then initiated one, sitting by him on the floor, shuffling near until their shoulders were touching. They spent a few minutes staring at the Drive Core without a word. It had the comforting, hypnotic effect of a candle flame. Kenneth's half of the Eye lay in front of them.

Gabriella Daniels decided to take a chance. She had graduated at the top of Tech Academy, seen some of the most brutal and risky fighting a warship engineer could see, and yet this seemed one of the riskiest chances she had ever taken. Gabby pulled out the object she had gone back to her room for: the other half.

"Kept yours too huh," Kenneth muttered. He still hadn't looked at her, despite their close proximity. And she still couldn't read his voice.

She gently pushed her half along the floor.

Kenneth's gaze fell from the Drive Core back to his half. Slowly, hesitantly, he mirrored Gabby's move.

The pieces flew together as if suddenly magnetised. Brilliant blue light burst from the pupil, adding itself to the glow of the Drive Core, dragging Gabby and Ken through a sea of memories: the spellbinding asari dance at Armali, the Skyllian Five game with Kasumi, the commotion of the Perugia's lower deck in battle two years ago, the hectic simulations they had done for final exams at Tech Academy, their first meeting in line at the Edmonton International Airport.

And then it was over. Kenneth's mouth was hanging open, Gabby was panting.

He turned to face her at last. "Did you see everything I saw?" he gasped.

"I think I did."

"Guess it isn't all gold after all." He picked up the now complete eye. It was warm and emitting a soft hum. Its light remained on, though no longer blindingly intense.

"It must be a neural mapper of some sort," Gabby said. "Like that implant Kasumi's got. But I think this only works for mutual memories." She shook her head, still awed. "Goddamn the asari are advanced."

"Probably based it on that weird mind meld thing they do."

"So…are you saying Kelly got us a sex toy at Armali?"

Kenneth was smirking in his special way again. "Just the sort of thing she'd ge- wait a minute, _Kelly?"_

"Oh come on, Kenneth. Us getting each half was hardly a coincidence."

"Ooooh! The super rational Gabby believes in romantic fate suddenly?"

"No." They had been apart for only hours and she'd missed this playful talk already. "I believe Kelly's been meddling with us for a while."

_Probably shouldn't divulge the full wager thing yet._

Kenneth shrugged. "Mmm. I suspected." He was looking sadly into the Drive Core again. "Should've figured this all out long ago. Should have figured a _lot _out long ago. I must be getting soft in the head."

"Don't feel bad about it," said Gabby gently. "We've all gone crazy lately."

"I told you I wanted us to be strangers if we survived this," he breathed, disgusted at the very sound of the words.

So this was what he was so torn up over.

"And I said I wished I hadn't met you," she countered, taking her own turn to feel a surge of guilt. "You're not the only screwup in this room. And you're not the only person who didn't mean it."

"So we _are _getting soft in the head?"

Gabby shrugged, smiling. "Pretty much."

"Must be the endless eezo exposure."

"That would make a lot more sense than the usual reasons."

Maybe it was the lingering effects of the neural mapper, but this suggestion of Kenneth's reminded Gabby of another time Element Zero's effect on the brain had come up.

"Wait…" she said, "so you're agreeing with Marlowe?"

"Partially. It hasn't made us ugly, has it?"

"Touché. Guess that's two things he's done for us."

"Two?"

"Well…" she looked at her feet, face heating up. "I'd say the strength of our friendship owes quite a bit to him being such a dick."

"Yeah."

Gabby decided to seize the opportunity while they were on the subject. She took a deep breath.

"Eezo-induced brain damage or not," she said. "There's something that's been on mine lately. Something you did figure out before me…or at least had the guts to mention before me."

Kenneth was sitting perfectly still. She took another deep breath.

"Just after we hit the Collector Ship, in the Medbay. You asked me something."

"Mmhm," Kenneth mumbled. Was that fear in his voice? He sounded like a man steeling himself for a final blow.

"I have an answer."

He turned back to her. The look in his eyes was desperate. He was pleading, _begging _for some sort of closure; daring her to break his heart at last and get it all over with.

She lowered her voice to a whisper, leaning in. "My answer is this: absolutely nothing. There's _nothing_ we should be waiting for."

Kenneth leaned forward until their foreheads were touching. She took his face into her hands.

"Glad to know we still think alike." he said.

Their lips met.

They moved together, just as they were meant to. Nothing in their lives worked without the other. The kiss said everything they ever wanted to say, overpowered half a decade of fear and hesitation and regret. They felt young, unmarked by the scars of the war, uncovered by the shadow of this suicide mission.

Gabby arms flew around Kenneth's neck as the kiss deepened. She moaned as she felt his hands around her waist, slipping onto the skin beneath her shirt. She ran her fingers through his hair, eliciting an approving moan of her own. They soon fell from their sitting position, knocked off balance by the rush of enthusiasm, rolling on the Engine Room floor for a few moments. Their mutual laugh (and the basic need for air) finally broke the kiss. Her heart was pounding, a newfound energy flowed through her. It was a feeling more addictive than she had ever imagined. Gabby gasped again as she felt the panels against her exposed lower back, felt the weight of Kenneth's body pressing into hers, and saw the love in his eyes. She gladly returned it.

The second kiss was even more longing, more fervent. She felt Kenneth getting to his feet, pulling her up with him, stumbling with her as they moved. Her back hit the door to the hallway behind them. She cried out as Kenneth's mouth found her neck and his touch crept below her waist; she wrapped her legs around his. Her hand flailed around wildly in search of the holographic switch. Kenneth laughed against her collarbone as he opened the door for them.

There were no more excuses to be made. There were no more Collectors or Reapers. Gabby and Ken cast aside the uncertainties of the future, taking the present into their own hands. Soon, everything else had melted away. Nothing remained but pure, unrestrained emotion; waves of pleasure.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, ? **

**Many hours later…**

Kenneth had lost track of time. He was mesmerised by the sleeping figure draped over his chest. The warmth of the smooth, flawless skin against his. The sound of her gentle breathing. The contented smile on her lips. He ran his hand over her silky hair, caressing lightly. Her eyes fluttered open, filling up with life as they found his.

"Hey there," Gabby whispered as a shameless grin spread across her face.

"Hey," was all he could manage in response. He was still shaking, dazed, intoxicated.

Gabby led a trail of kisses along his neck, stopping just beneath his ear. "You okay?" she breathed.

He gave the ceiling panels a sleepy, faraway smile. "Better than ever." He felt boneless; worn out in the best possible way. "At least now I know the full reason why they put you in charge of _propulsion_. God _damn._"

Gabby buried her face in the crook of his neck. "The best night of our lives and still you insist on the bad jokes?"

Kenneth sat up stiffly. "Sorry, I just thought-"

She silenced him with a kiss.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

They fell back on the pillow.

"So…" said Kenneth after a moment. "Seriously, though…how was-"

She took his hand, entwining their fingers, squeezing. "It was _wonderful,"_ she said firmly. "As were the two times we woke up following the first," she added mischievously.

Kenneth let out a contended yawn. Their embrace tightened.

"Good. Just making sure."

Gabby and Ken drifted towards sleep again, more calm and contented than they had ever been; finally freed from years of regret.

…and then jolted back into reality by a series of deafening knocks at the door.

"GET OUTTA MY ROOM YOU BLOODY HORNDOGS!"

"Oh god!" Gabby squealed, ducking below the sheets. "I just realised we're in Zaeed's room!"

She suddenly noticed the piles of ammunition and battle trophies as if they had just popped out of thin air. Then every other horrible realisation came: like the fact that they were scheduled to review the upgrades with the Cerberus team and their commanding officer; a commanding officer who was still keeping a close eye on their psychological wellbeing. For all she knew the whole team was already waiting outside the door, enraged at being held up by the raging lust of inconsiderate co-workers.

"GET OUT! BEFORE I BLOW UP THIS FUCKING DOOR!"

"_Kenneth!" _Gabby hissed, trying to simultaneously keep the bed sheet wrapped around herself and gather their discarded clothing. "Help me!"

But Kenneth was quite unconcerned. He tucked his hands behind his head, eyes still dreamy and unfocused, mouth curled up into a satisfied smirk.

"You worry too much Gab," he said smugly. "Where a master goes, his student follows."

"What do you mea-"

Her question was immediately answered by the sounds of Zaeed being dragged away.

"GET OFF ME YOU BLOODY LIZARD!"

Grunt's unmistakeable voice answered. "Never, _ever _interrupt a mating ritual in front of a krogan Massani!"

Gabby laughed, hardly able to believe their luck. Kenneth sat up behind her, kissing her shoulder.

"Looks like Grunt bought us a few more minutes," he said suggestively.

Gabby checked her omni-tool. To her relief she saw that Shepard and the upgrade crew weren't scheduled to arrive yet. The paranoid old mercenary must have been acting outside of official orders.

"Yeah. I'm gonna sneak in a quick shower before the others arrive."

"Oh," said Kenneth, sounding a little disappointed.

"And you're coming with me."

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Work passed by with incredible speed for Kenneth that day. It all seemed a blur, despite the importance of the mission. He had never believed he could be so happy. He would surely have to recheck his contributions for the day more thoroughly later on, when some of the giddiness had leaked out of his brain. Since finishing an unforgettable shower earlier on, he'd practically been on autopilot for the entire upgrade review.

Kenneth noticed the same behaviour in Gabby. Tali had joined them and the Cerberus team as they all ran the necessary kinetic barrier tests, leaving little time for the exchange of lustful stares and flirty conversation stacked with suggestive hints. In fact, the two of them were more muted and professional than usual that day. Zaeed and Grunt were hardly gossips, and Tali seemed too thrilled with the new multicore shielding to notice anything amiss, so their little secret was safe for now.

Kenneth took his chance when Tali became absorbed in the cleaning of a particularly stubborn engine. He opened instant the messaging function.

**- So Gabby, got any plans for this evening? -  
**

**- Tut, tut. Skipping our duties for idle chatter yet again Kenneth? -  
**

**- Come on Gab, does it really bother you still? - **

**- It would if I didn't love you - **

**[MESSAGE ADDED TO FAVORITES]**

* * *

**Author's Note: I can't thank you all enough for the support and attention this fic has received. And I can't apologise enough for my absence. I can, however, promise that more is coming for this story, and that it will be very soon.**


	26. Requests

**New fic alert: fans of Dragon Age (and House of Cards) check out The Grey Prince by yours truly.**

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **MSolus

**To: **KDonnelly

**Subject: **Just to be safe

Hope supplies of emergency contraceptive prove satisfactory. Should point out: routine Element Zero exposure creates chance of biotic ability in progeny should Engineer Daniels become pregnant. Pregnancy inadvisable, however; not well-suited to missions with low survivability rate. Upcoming Derelict Reaper venture also brings high chance of physical trauma for people in Engine Room not strapped to anything.

Recommend removal of cyanide capsules from hollowed out molars before each session. Intense kissing/fetishistic biting in fit of passion could prove catastrophic.

Also, suggest reinforcement of bed/s. Cerberus standard-issue single beds not suited for frequent human coital activity. Reinforcement required. Option to ask the Commander in private for permission to remove dividing wall and install double bed also a possibility. Would make things awkward in the event of breakup, however.

Am aware of extended "dry spell" leading up to present relationship; overenthusiastic compensating increases risk of injury; restraint required. Can supply oils or ointments to reduce discomfort. Gave EDI electronic relationship aid demonstration vids to use if necessary.

P.S. am flattered you chose me over Doctor Chakwas for discreet provision of contraceptive. Will keep up doctor/patient confidentiality without fail.

* * *

**[VIEWING: KDonnelly – Outbox]**

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 1)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **A request

So Commander, I just got back from a standard checkup with Mordin and it turns out Gabby and I aren't getting adequate spinal support from the beds down here. Do you think maybe you could spare some materials or place a requisition order from

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 2)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **Urgent alteration to Engineering Quarters required

Commander,

I've just realised that the wall separating our rooms could pose a severe fire safety hazard and would make evacuation difficult. We also aren't properly prepared for a power failure: Engineers need to be in a position where they can communicate without interruption at all times. It wouldn't be difficult or damaging to the ship: just a quick power tool to the wire mesh and it's done.

Gabby's on board with separating the walls too: it'd be no different that the situation in the Crew Quarters up there on Deck 3.

No need to consult Tali, she already knows why it has to be done.

Also, we might need a double bed to replace our current ones. Recent studies have shown that productivity in human brains (particularly those involved in STEM work) increases after sleeping in the same bed as another human. Something about shared pheromones or

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 3)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **Just a suggestion

Hey Commander,

So it turns out Cerberus spared no expense on rebuilding the Normandy, except that FBA couplings oversight, and a small problem I've just noticed with the wall. And our beds.

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 4)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **Small housekeeping issue

Hey Commander,

So, you know that thin wall separating my room from Gabby's?

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 9)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **I suck at writing these.

Titty sprinkles.

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**CREATE NEW MESSAGE**

**(Draft 21)**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **From one horny man to another

Howdy there Shepard! Mind if I ask for some money out of the budget for this monumentally important suicide mission so that I can have a wall taken down and a double bed installed?

Why, you ask? To make wild, animalistic sex with my new girlfriend easier of course!

Oh what's that? You can't spare the funds? You need that money and those resources to fight a technologically-advanced superspecies who threaten every human in the galaxy, and carry out the orders of cosmic monstrosities?

I'll just go die of embarrassment in this corner. Thanks for your time!

**[DRAFT DELETED]**

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**[Draft 37]**

**Select recipient: **CShepard

**Create subject: **Fuck. This. In. The. Cloaca.

I'll do it later.

That rhymes!

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **EDI

**To: **KDonnelly

**Subject: **Re: those private things Mordin sent you

As per your request, I have forwarded the instructional vids to your omni-tool and private terminal in the Engineer's Quarters.

I have also made several copies and sent them to the crew, with relevant information informing them of your new relationship. According to my databases, ideas flourish when shared among sapient communities, sex tips being no exception.

…that was a joke.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KellyGrrl

**To: **KasumiG, GoldaG

**Subject: **Wonderful news! :D

Looks like we won't have to go against Gabby's wishes _or _lose any of our hard-earned money on this bet. Time to call a stalemate. No one loses.

Because everything worked itself out!

That fight between Zaeed and Grunt was over the love birds using Zaeed's room. You know how krogan get around mating. To answer your questions, yes Goldstien I learned this by looking at the Commander terminal, and no Kasumi, I did not do it because I have trust issues, I just wanted to know why those boys were fighting.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **KasumiG

**To: **KellyGrrl, GoldaG

**Subject: **Re:Wonderful news! **(EDIT: **Enough with the emoticons Kelly)

Awww I'm so happy for them. And a little sad I won't be getting your money through an excessively elaborate scheme.

Learning to trust Shepard's fidelity _and _predict my questions word-for-word? Proud of ya Kelly, there may be hope for you yet kid!

The prize money is still pooled together, you know…

The only loose end is how we're gonna spend all of it. Let's not go all cliché and give it to Gabby and Ken to make their first date a memorable one (you may be improving Kelly, but I can still predict your every move.) If they can get together and risk Zaeed's wrath over getting laid without our help, they don't need our money.

* * *

**[NEW MESSAGE]**

**From: **GoldaG

**To: **KasumiG, KellyGrrl

**Subject: **Wonderful news! **(EDIT: **Kasumi's right, your emoticon overuse sucks)

That is great news. Those guys deserve some happiness, stubborn and slow as they've been on the way to it.

Agreed on the money thing too. We can still be recklessly competitive though, right girls? If we aren't gonna spend it we might as well blow it on something fun! Kasumi's got half an amusement park in that room of hers, so…poker? Could even invite Grunt, I think he might be ready at last.

* * *

**Normandy SR-2, Engineering Deck, Engine Room**

Tali decided she still had a lot to learn about humans. Things never quite went the way common sense dictated they would with humans involved. According to Shepard, Gabby and Ken would be undergoing a casual psych evaluation on the job today. She came into the Engine Room (after the Cerberus teams departed) expecting more of the same: frostiness, tension, subpar work and cutting remarks muttered back and forth whenever they assumed she couldn't hear them. Instead her Engineers had proven pictures of professionalism, arriving together on time, freshly showered, still not back to their usual chatty selves yet showing no disrespect or pettiness when work needed discussing. If anything, they were overcompensating with an excess of politeness and a dearth of eye contact. The hours went by with a speed and proficiency not seen since their engagement with the Collector Ship weeks ago. Tali supposed they were embarrassed about their behaviour (rightly so) and had come to some private truce. Maybe they were venting with vicious arguments in the unusual amount of mutual breaks taken.

Trusting there was enough air cleared to ensure their quality of work wouldn't suffer, Tali left. She needed to discuss the implications of installing a Reaper IFF with Shepard, EDI and Joker personally.

"Aaaaand she's gone," Gabby murmured.

Kenneth checked the left side of the room, Gabby the right. Neither of them did anything else until assured Jack was out of earshot and there would be no sudden guests coming in. Then they were in each other's arms, lips locked, hands eagerly wandering, caressing everything they found.

Kenneth broke the kiss far sooner than either of them would have liked. Gabby held on as tightly as she could.

"You okay?" she whispered.

"I'm fine. Just a little jittery. Can't be too careful," he said apologetically.

He wasn't wrong: between Tali, Jack, that window in the Crew Quarters, Kelly and Kasumi's nosiness, Zaeed (who was surely plotting revenge for what happened earlier) and Grunt (who handled nothing with care) hiding their new relationship seemed an impossible task on a par with the overall mission. Still, they refused to be beaten so easily. The secrecy would be fun while it lasted; a nice middle finger to all the prying interference and its crazy consequences these past few weeks.

"You're right," she breathed. "But we're still all alone, and I don't hear any-"

That was all the encouragement Kenneth needed. Their lips didn't separate again until a mutual need for air became overpowering.

"I love you," Kenneth gasped as they broke apart.

Gabby winked. "I know."

Kenneth went on as if he hadn't heard her. It sounded like he'd been rehearsing this little speech for a while. "Just thought I'd say it now, while I can. Out loud. _So _good to be able to actually tell you. I know I don't deserve this and I know I'm not good at a lot of things, and I screw up more than-"

Gabby gently put a finger to his lips. "I love you too Kenneth. I love you so much I'm going to forgive the fact that you missed my most obvious reference to _that _old vid you're obsessed with."

"Oh I noticed it alright," Kenneth said, trademark cockiness returning to his demeanour. "But I was far too proud of myself for finding yet another way to one-up you."

"Is that right, Casanova?"

"Gabby I adore you, but let's face it; we're never going to stop being competitive." He puffed himself up, pride on full display. "I got to say 'I love you' first."

"I beg your pardon!" She pulled away, pointing at their terminals like a prosecutor pointing out evidence in a courtroom. "And just what does my message earlier count as?"

Kenneth remained as puffed up as ever. "I was the first to _say_ 'I love you.' As in say it out loud, not type it."

"The man who's always messaging me during work hours suddenly doesn't count messages as conversation?"

He gave her a patronising pat on the head. "Give it up Gab, I beat you to that milestone."

There was more than one way to be competitive. _Time to take you down a peg Ken. Engage Womanly Charm Mode!_

Gabby leaned forward, whispering into his ear. "Well maybe I'm not feeling too verbal right now. Maybe I'm more interested in you…showing me how much you love me. Let's sneak off somewhere again, during our next break."

"Interested in more than just making out and then reducing the size of our suspiciously swollen lips with ice packs, huh?"

"Yes," she said with feigned innocence.

An awed look filled Kenneth's eyes. Gabby couldn't tell if this was a genuine brainwave or another joke.

"Wow!" he croaked. "I should start my own religion, because today I might become a prophet!"

"What? What are you talking about Kenneth?"

Kenneth lowered his voice. "Didn't I say all this female energy would be the death of me? We've shagged four times today; thrice in Zaeed's room and once in the showers! Dammit woman, I may be in Cerberus but I'm not upgraded like Shepard!"

"Oh come on! Pleeeease? Just one more?"

Gabby could feel a blush coming on; she wasn't used to being seductive, or being considered sexy. There was an element of ridiculousness about the whole situation; that awful too-good-to-be-true suspicion lingered. She still feared waking up on the Citadel and finding out it was all a dream.

Kenneth sighed with hyperbolic fervour, though inside he was thrilled. "Alright, one more."

Gabby was looking at him in a way that usually suggested the arrival of a brilliant new idea for engineering, leavened this time with a hint of lust.

"So, I just remembered that ladder in Jack's hidey-hole leads to the AI Core," she said suggestively. "You know, that soundproofed room no one uses."

"And? Gabby, you aren't seriously suggesting we-"

"We'll wait until Jack's out of her room first, obviously. Then we'll sneak up, 'investigate the core,' then sneak down and no one will be any the wiser."

Kenneth could scarcely believe his luck. _I__ called it a long time ago: Maneater._

"And if we get caught by her? Or Tali, wondering where we are? Or Kasumi or Kelly or the hordes of other psychotic busybodies on this ship?"

"Tell them we're 'checking the thermal ducts' or something."

"But why would we be in the AI Core? Gotta have your alibi figured out, Gab."

Kenneth started to wonder why he was making excuses for not doing this. Especially with a woman he'd loved for years. Maybe he was too used to arguing.

"We'll Shepard the usual BS," Gabby said. "Tell him we think we've neglected the AI Core as a component of the ship's functionality and want to learn more about it in order to improve our duties."

Kenneth considered the idea. "That's…plausible," he said after a moment. "Never too old to learn something new."

"Humbleness from Kenneth Donnelly? I thought you knew everything!" she teased.

"I can still learn things." He grabbed Gabby's hand, pulling her back into his embrace. "I learned how _filthy _your language is at about three o'clock this morning. I mean, I was already aware you knew your way around a curse word but good _god_ woman, you could pass for Scottish!"

"Thank you!" said Gabby, beaming. "Can't wait to give you plenty more examples."

Not willing to tempt fate with Tali back at any potential moment, they reluctantly returned to their terminals.

"Gab. Hot as all this sneaking around is, it can't last forever. When do we tell the others?"

"We'll tell them when we're damn well ready. It'd be nice for this to go on our own terms for once."

"True enough, but how are we gonna keep Zaeed and Grunt quiet?"

There was a sparkle of mischief in Gabby's eyes. "I'll tell Grunt human couples need to be the first to reveal their mating rituals to others, on their own terms, in order maximise the odds of conception."

"I…see. Interesting choice of lie there…"

"Don't worry, I'm not trying to steal sperm off you Ken."

"I'm glad to hear it. Anyway, you sure Grunt would buy that?"

"He's from an almost sterile, dying species, he won't argue. It's not like he has the attention span to do the proper research anyway."

"And Zaeed?"

"I'll threaten to tell everyone he got his ass kicked by a baby."

"That's my girl! Should cover us just fine, long as Zaeed agrees with you on Grunt's exact 'birth' day."

"You disagree?"

"Well…there was a large expulsion of fluid with a massive reptile falling into the world, followed by a naming, followed by gunshots. I'd say that's a standard krogan birth down to a T, minus the vagina and a fuckload of other eggs."

Gabby laughed. "We should celebrate the first anniversary of that day, if he's still with us in a year."

"Any excuse to drink, my dear. A happy tank-opening day to us all!"

But Gabby's smile had already vanished. "If any of us are still here in a year," she mumbled.

"Don't talk like that Gab," Kenneth urged. "We're making it."

"Kenneth how can you be so su-"

He reached over and took her hand. "I may not know everything, but I know this much: we are surviving this Gabby. I'm certain."

"Why?"

"Because we've got a hell of a lot more motivation to come back now."

* * *

**Tune in next chapter for some Legion!**


End file.
